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PODCAST

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets Pop Culture

Political Humor Today"s News / Caloroga Shark Media

In the spirit of The Daily Show, Last Week Tonight, and yes, even those Pod Save America guys, we’re cutting through the chaos of Trump’s second term and the Democrats’ sudden hot streak. From Zohran Mamdani shocking New York to Gavin Newsom redrawing democracy with a kombucha in hand, we’ll break down the biggest stories with sharp humor, a little parody, and zero political homework required. Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

comedy stand-up

All Episodes

5:10

The Haunted Christmas White House

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/12/05

From Washington DC where it’s not only the weather that’s frightful, this is Ballot. Melania’s Christmas décor goes full Tim Burton with mugshot LEGOs, butterfly swarms, and candelabras fit for a haunted mansion. Portland lights “the tree” — carefully avoiding the word Christmas — amid chants, land acknowledgments, and performance-art politics. And in New York, the city’s Christmas tree titans wage a turf war straight out of The Sopranos. Turns out holiday cheer comes with muscle.Unlock an ad-free

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4:19

Trump Declares War On “Affordability” — Then Roasts...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/12/04

Trump’s latest economic sermon turns into verbal Twister as “affordability” becomes both his favorite word and his sworn enemy. JD Vance gets roasted to his face while trying not to blink. And in a sharp detour, we head to America’s emergency rooms, where marijuana users are learning the word “scromiting.” It’s economic whiplash, political humiliation, and medical horror — all in one festive package.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get all our shows on any player you

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4:25

Trump Nods Off As His Cabinet Turns Into ‘Adult Daycare’

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/12/03

President Trump’s marathon Cabinet session devolves into doodles, typos, third-person motivational speeches, and a boom-mic Q&A nobody asked for. Russell Vought is drawing Bob Ross landscapes, Pete Hegseth arrives as the “ssecretary of war,” and Trump tries to prove he’s “sharp” by saying “Trump is sharp.” The meeting ends with table-slapping, shoulder-thumping, and enough chaos to qualify as an office Christmas party gone horribly wrong.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark

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4:47

Trump Goes Full Thumbs-of-Fury While DC Freaks Out...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/12/02

President Trump unleashes a late-night, one-hundred-sixty-post Truth Social rampage featuring conspiracy theories, political enemies, and his Home Alone 2 cameo… because why not. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth turns Franklin the Turtle into a festive war criminal. And Washington loses its mind because Usha Vance wasn’t wearing her wedding ring at a volunteer event. From DC where you should wear your wedding ring — seriously, wear it — this is Ballot. Portions of today’s show were made with the help

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7:20

Sleepy Don? Report Says Trump Slashes Workday, Naps...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/12/02

A bombshell report says Trump has gutted his schedule by nearly forty percent, is rolling into “official duties” after lunchtime, and keeps dozing through appearances — all while insisting he’s in peak shape after a mysterious MRI he can’t quite explain. The White House calls it transparency. Critics call it a presidential siesta.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get all our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple

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4:37

Trump pardons two turkeys - are the turkeys in The...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/26

President Trump pardons Gobble and Waddle while taking a swing at Biden’s “invalid” autopen turkey pardon. Melania sets a record with the shortest Christmas tree ceremony in White House history, delivering a drive-by “beautiful.” Plus: Trump teases a Ukraine peace deal and personally revives Rush Hour 4 like he’s running a Hollywood agency with nuclear codes. A very twenty-twenty-five Thanksgiving.We’re going to try to take the holiday weekend off but its 2025 so there’s bound to be 40 crazy things

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6:47

Trump eyes Jackie Chan comeback PLUS DC wants you to...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/25

Trump wants a Rush Hour reboot and is pitching Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker like it’s nineteen ninety-eight again. Meanwhile, Usha Vance sparks online chaos by simply not wearing her wedding ring to Camp Lejeune. And the DOT launches a new crusade to stop America’s worst airplane gremlins as holiday travel hits record levels. Patrick digs into Hollywood dreams, ring conspiracies, and why flying now requires both patience and combat training.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark

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5:17

Greene quits Congress, Trump feuds with the Giants,...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/24

Marjorie Taylor Greene is cashing out and tapping out — quitting Congress after a spectacular breakup with President Trump while quietly watching her net worth explode from seven hundred thousand to twenty-five million. Patrick breaks down the political soap opera, Trump’s midnight tariff rants, his five-a.m. meltdown over the New York Giants, and the Thanksgiving-deadline Ukraine plan that blindsided Europe and sent Zelensky scrambling. It’s political musical chairs with a side of holiday

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6:51

“Arabic Numerals” Freakout, Trump–Mamdani Summit, and...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/21

From Washington DC, Patrick Gutfield breaks down a truly chaotic Friday: viral outrage over “Arabic numerals,” Trump’s tense meeting with New York mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani, the President’s explosive reaction to lawmakers warning troops against illegal orders, and the White House defending Trump calling a reporter “Piggy.” Plus, Trump renews his crusade to get Jimmy Kimmel fired — again.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get all our shows on any player you love, hassle

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5:43

The Other JD Vance, Trump’s Desk Theater, and MTG...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/20

A man named James Donald Vance Jr. was arrested for threatening to kill President Trump and Vice President JD Vance, leading to the most confusing Secret Service paperwork in American history. We dig into Trump printing out his own social media posts like a one-man scrapbook, Keith Urban performing an LGBTQ+ anthem at Mar-a-Lago, and the latest MAGA-versus-MAGA meltdown as Marjorie Taylor Greene calls Trump a “traitor” while standing with Epstein survivors. It’s the kind of political circus where

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8:18

Trump Defends MBS, Melts Down Over Epstein Files, and...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/19

President Trump shrugged off the murder of Jamal Khashoggi with a casual “things happen,” snapped at reporters asking about the newly released Epstein emails, and even called one “Piggy.” We break down the jaw-dropping accusations in the Epstein files, Trump’s increasingly frantic denials, the White House’s very creative explanation for letting an American flag hit the ground, and the House’s lopsided 427-to-1 vote to release the documents. Plus: the lone “no” vote, Clay Higgins, and the Senate’s

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5:51

Trump reverses on Epstein files as tensions rise with...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/18

Trump suddenly shifts course and urges House Republicans to release the Epstein files after weeks of trying to block them, sparking a feud with Marjorie Taylor Greene. At the same time, rising tensions with Venezuela collide with talk of possible negotiations as U.S. warships sit off the coast. And in the entertainment lane, Trump renews his demand for NBC to fire Seth Meyers — amplified by an eyebrow-raising signal boost from the FCC chairman fresh off a weekend at Mar-a-Lago.Unlock an ad-free

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5:35

A Billie Eilish vs Elon Musk war? That sounds fun!

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/17

From Chicago — where President Trump demanded troops for the non-existent “Miracle Mile” — Ballot breaks down a day of presidential confusion, late-night energy bragging, and celebrity fury. Trump’s geography gaffe sets the tone as ABC’s Jonathan Karl reveals the president’s frantic no-sleep routine, prompting the White House to insist he’s basically immortal despite MRIs, bruised hands, and mid-event nod-offs.Then Billie Eilish jumps in swinging, blasting Elon Musk over his trillion-dollar payday

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4:38

Megyn Kelly Defends 15… Trump Ducks Questions… and...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/14

Megyn Kelly set the internet on fire after arguing a defense so deranged it made even her fans recoil. Then: Trump holds a foster-care event at the White House and delivers a speech that instantly went into the Word Salad Hall of Fame — complete with a mangled “adopt the general population” line and a right hand that looks like it fought a stapler and lost.Plus: Kai Trump hits the LPGA Tour and posts an eighty-three that would make most golfers fake an injury, though she insists she “outdrove the

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5:57

Trump calls Epstein emails a 'hoax'

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/13

Patrick Gutfield unpacks the latest political circus: Donald Trump's Truth Social meltdown over newly released Epstein emails. The president's response? Classic deflection - calling the potentially explosive documents a "hoax" and demanding everyone look at the government shutdown instead.We're breaking down the emails that suggest Trump might have known more about Jeffrey Epstein than he's letting on, while he's frantically waving the shutdown flag like a magician trying to distract the

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8:51

The Airports Are About to Get Even Worse

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/12

America’s skies are in meltdown as the shutdown leaves air traffic controllers unpaid, flights grounded, and Trump promising mystery bonuses from “some place.” Laura Ingraham actually does journalism for once, grilling him on housing, China, and chaos in the skies. And in corporate land, Paramount tells workers “five days a week or hit the eject button,” and six hundred take the parachute.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get all our shows on any player you love, hassle

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5:41

MAGA Dating Meltdown in Washington, and Elon Musk’s...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/11

The Washington dating scene is on fire — and not in the fun way. We dig into new reporting on why pro-Trump singles are struggling to find partners in the bluest city in America, where 92% of voters went Democrat and MAGA staffers are now speed-dating each other at partisan mixers because they’re tired of being called fascists on Hinge. You’ll meet the women who moved to D.C. looking for “masculine, faith-driven providers” and instead found overworked political guys who ghost after six weeks because

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5:31

Inside Trump’s $300M Golden White House Ballroom:...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/10

Conservative host Glenn Beck says Trump personally told him the real reason he’s tearing down the East Wing and replacing it with a 90,000-square-foot, gold-soaked, bulletproof ballroom: foreign leaders only respect “power and wealth,” and Trump wants them to feel like they’re walking into a palace. We explain how Trump fast-tracked demolition, bypassed normal review, and greenlit a project that’s expected to cost around $300 million and seat more than triple what the old East Room could handle —

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7:15

Yes, We Clone: Brady’s Dog, Mamdani’s Win & Trump’s...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/07

Zohran Mamdani makes history as New York’s first Muslim mayor, Tom Brady clones his dog because of course he does, and President Trump decides to celebrate his eightieth birthday with a UFC fight on the White House lawn. From politics to pets to the Octagon, it’s another totally normal week in America.Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get all our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other

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6:45

Yes, We Can… Sing! Trump Melts Down as Mamdani Rises...

Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets... ·

2025/11/06

It was a bad week to be Donald Trump and a great one for anyone who likes seeing him lose. Democrats swept major races nationwide—Zohran Mamdani made history as New York’s first Muslim mayor, Gavin Newsom outmaneuvered Trump’s redistricting games, and Abigail Spanberger flipped Virginia blue. As Trump raged in all caps on Truth Social, off-Broadway found hope and harmony in Forty-Four, a new musical about Barack Obama’s presidency. Because when politics gets too grim, there’s always a song about

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