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PODCAST

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily

Celebrity memoirs aren’t like normal books—they’re fun! Join comedians Steven Phillips-Horst (@gossipbabies) & Lily Marotta (@lilyblueyez) as they rifle through the diaries of drug-addled starlets, oddly obsessive restaurateurs, brass-knuckled female realtors, and boring gay politicians’ even more boring gay husbands, finding fertile ground for searing cultural insights and juicy gossip. Martinis not included.

comedy books

All Episodes

56:59

Lana “Del Taco” Rey

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/04/19

Reading Lana Del Rey’s bookViolets Bent Backwards Over the Grass Under a bridge looking over the freeway Thinking of LA Thinking of nothing Lana make me a weird stew Sepia toned photos of kitchensLana you stay in your room Jealous of your orange trees Lana with your trad cosplay Watching basketball on low volume Driving to Macy’s in your big truck Lana, can I come over ? Do you have gays? Do you like girls? Boyfriends only…Lana, write me a poem please $28.99 To get the explosive second half of

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1:38

VIP Teaser: Don’t Call It Nawlins

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/04/14

TGIF! We’re cruising down to the Big Easy, as Steven recounts the first half of his wild trip to New Orleans. Snooping maids! Celebrity gossip! Haunted real estate! And are TV shams chic?? Plus—Lily shocks the world with a heartwarming, gender-affirming semi-nude encounter in the YMCA “run-down Sheraton vibes” women’s sauna. To hear the whole thing, go to http://patreon.com/cbcthepod See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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55:12

Marina "Guy's Girl" Abramović

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/04/12

The podcast is present. Throw on your best Yohji dress, we're going to the opening for Slavic seductress, mistress of MoMA, and iconic performance artist—Marina Abramović—and her durational memoir, "Walk Through Walls." From growing up under the communist regime of Tito's Yugoslavia to becoming the Queen Bee of the contemporary art world, living with the Aborigines, getting poisoned with pulverized diamonds, beaten by your own mother for sleeping messily, a rigorous discussion of

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53:23

Lance “Cosmonaut” Bass

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/04/05

I’m Gay! Head to Orlando and frost your tips as we dive into former *NSYNC member Lance Bass’s bestselling memoir, "Out of Sync." We discuss his rise to fame in the Mississippi state fair circuit, breaking away from famously abusive manager Lou Pearlman, the faux Backstreet rivalry, coming out to Reba’s head of PR, his nonexistent relationship with Justin Timberlake, dating OG gay celeb Reichen Lehmkuhl, and being so closeted he literally wanted to launch himself into space. Bye Bye Bye we do NOT

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55:57

Paris "Blockchain Queen" Hilton

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/29

That's hot! Cash in your inheritance, we're checking into Hotel Hilton with OG heiress and miniature canine enthusiast—Paris Hilton—and her appropriately titled new blockbuster "Paris: A Memoir." The inventor of the selfie and lynchpin of modern celebrity is back with a shocking tell-all: from the horrific abuse she's suffered at "troubled teen" schools to becoming the highest paid DJ in the world, naming all her dogs after cryptocurrencies, reviving Heatherette, how The Simple Life invented the

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48:46

Whoopi "Very Scatological" Goldberg

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/22

Icons only! EGOT winner and The View's current warden Whoopi Goldberg finally makes her CBC debut with a deeply random book of advice "If Someone Says "You Complete Me," RUN!: Whoopi's Big Book of Relationships." From almost getting married to Ted Danson to actually getting married to three other guys, possibly being asexual, definitely being a lesbian icon, her attraction to Minions, obsession with farting, and how we all define intimacy, there's a big cache of critical romance data to unpack—and a

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2:49

VIP Teaser: 36 Tracks

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/17

TGIF, cowgirls! We're giving you the stan breakdown no one asked for—our exclusive review of all 36 tracks of Morgan Wallen's new album "One Thing At A Time," which just went to number one on the Billboard 200. Can you come back from racial controversy? (Yes). Is Morgan really sober? (No). Did God invent the concept of the bar? (Yes). Who is the real Drake of country? (Hint: It's Sam Hunt). All this and more in our spirited, no-holds-barred acoustic Nashville session. Howdy! To hear the whole

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58:38

"Casanova"

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/15

Buongiorno! Hop in a gondola back to 18th century Venice, as we raid the little black book of the most infamous male slut in history—Giacomo Casanova—and the abridged version of his memoirs, "The Venetian Years." From the Spanish Inquisition to dildos of antiquity, incest, male wigs, Catholicism, feminism, and why castratos were the original trans girls, this is a fiery journey through the history of passion. Call me, x Plus! In the VIP Lounge this Friday—we give an exhaustive review of Morgan

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60:41

Jackson "Cat Daddy" Galaxy

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/08

Paws up, club kids! Sharpen your claws and get out the wet food, we're chasing mice with Jackson Galaxy—star of Animal Planet's "My Cat From Hell"—and his furry folk odyssey "Cat Daddy: What the World's Most Incorrigible Cat Taught Me About Life, Love, and Coming Clean." From the Boulder music scene to feline abortion, how to not anthropomorphize your cat, guardians not owners, not getting hired due to white dreads, and all our childhood kitty memories, this is one purrfect trip to the pound

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2:37

VIP Teaser: Queer Fine Dining

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/03

TGIF, ladies! No tenderqueer is spared in Steven's blow-by-blow review of the new, very expensive haute quisine restaurant HAGS. We also discuss the TikTok phenomenon of "Borgs," why no one leaves their door unlocked anymore, and wonder if any food can really be an aphrodisiac. Please drink responsibly. Hear the entire 45-minute episode here: http://patreon.com/cbcthepodSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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54:48

Andy “Corner Bistro” Cohen

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/03/01

It's the Baron of Bravo, the King of the Housewives, the Warden of the West Village— Andy Cohen!— and his delirious memoir "The Andy Cohen Diaries: A Deep Look at a Shallow Year." Travel back to 2013/2014 as the inventor of women recounts in painstaking detail every boozy brunch with Kelly Ripa, stays single, loses weight, lives for activations, dishes about Theresa Caputo and Kathy Griffin, and provides an historically significant account of gay male life in the 21st century. Plus! In the VIP

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61:05

Nora “Cuisinart Class” Ephron

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/02/22

I’ll have what she’s having! Tuck into your favorite Jewish deli with our most iconic New York writeuse, Nora Ephron, and her poignant treatise on aging, “I Feel Bad About My Neck.” From face creams to facing death, the invention of the studiously unfussy dinner party, Rosie O’s happy meal toy collection, and how the simultaneous introduction of Julia Child and birth control changed the world—this is a touching tribute to the neurotic white woman who lives inside us all. AND! In the VIP Lounge

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57:00

Shannon “Skinemax” Tweed

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/02/15

Calling all bunnies! It’s Canadian Playboy model, softcore pornstar & wife of KISS frontman Gene Simmons—Shannon Tweed—and her sultry “Kiss & Tell.” From growing up on a mink farm in Dildo, Newfoundland (look it up) to becoming Hugh Hefner’s primary partner, this is one turbo-charged trip to tittie-town. AND! For the first time in CBC history, Steven’s iconic cousin Monica calls into the pod to share her own wild stories of partying at the Playboy mansion. Yes, there are monkey

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59:46

Barbra “Actual Gay Son” Streisand

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/02/08

Mama, can you hear me? Say hello, dolly to the OG funny girl— it’s Babs!—and her coffee table book/renovation diary “My Passion For Design.” The siren of stage and screen has compiled a bewildering tome chronicling the painstaking construction of her Malibu Dream Home, including its period-accurate Mill House with antique water wheel, sumptuous screening room, koi pond (with no orange fish), and yes, her infamous underground mall. From Tiffany lamps to Thomas Kinkaide, pocket doors to pocketbooks,

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65:04

“Prince Harry” Part 2

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/02/01

Fancy a cuppa? It’s part two of our explosive investigation into Prince Harry’s “Spare”— and the tea is piping, innit. From Meghan’s sad dad to Harry’s Botswana tattoo, why Eat Pray Love makes you cultured, the Nazi costume, getting HIV tested with Rihanna, murdering the Taliban, not sitting with your partner at a wedding, and Meghan and Kate’s nuclear cat fight—this is a scorching tale of blood, patriotism, and gastropubs. PLUS! In the VIP Lounge this Friday—Lily quizzes Steven on the British

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60:17

“Prince Harry” Part 1

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/01/25

You know the story. You’ve seen the headlines. Now hear the very first episode in our groundbreaking two-part series on the most explosive book of the year—Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex—and his shocking tell-all “Spare.” From Frogmore to Balmoral, Meghan’s traumatized puppers to Meghan pretending not to know who Diana is, their first date at Soho House, is Harry the Kourtney?, poverty cosplay at TK Maxx, and tripping on shrooms in Courtney Cox’s house—this is just the tip of the royal iceberg. God

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56:22

Jenny “Tiny Little Mouse” Slate

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/01/18

Crank the twee-meter up to Wes Anderson—we’re playing house with Cobble Hill’s eensiest weensiest comedienne, Jenny Slate, and her absurdist memoir “Little Weirds.” Magical realism meets Freshman year personal essay in this Dickinsonian teacup of cuteness, as the self-described “rabbit” unloads her colonial Massachusetts sexual anxieties and processes Trump’s election via poetic non-fiction about being small. From quiet trips to Scandinavia to being afraid to order wine, this ep will have you

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60:22

Jackie “Toxic Black Belt” Chan

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/01/11

Kung who? Pour one out for the original Drunken Master—global action superstar Jackie Chan—and his high-flying 2015 memoir “Never Grow Up.” From his childhood class dysphoria to becoming the most toxic millionaire in Hong Kong, buying watches for all your boys, cheating on your wife, why Mao was a narcissist, shitting on set, Communist Party propaganda, and Lily’s tween foray into karate—this one’s gonna hurt. PLUS! In the VIP Lounge this Friday—2023 predictions, Zero Dark Thirty, and a hot new

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4:08

VIP Teaser: Stop Celebrating Everything

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/01/06

Happy New Year! The gals eviscerate end-of-year Instagram carousel culture, Lily revisits Atlantic City and has size dysmorphia in the Big & Tall section, Steven reviews Monkey Bar, and we learn that sometimes the best table in the restaurant… is the one you’re already at. Subscribe here to listen http://patreon.com/cbcthepodSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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54:55

Brooklyn “Parsons Dropout” Beckham

Celebrity Book Club with Steven & Lily ·

2023/01/04

Grab your Leica, we’re steaming up the dark room with Brooklyn Beckham and his fine art photography coffee table book, “What I See.” The eldest son of Posh Spice and David Beckham takes us on a journey of family vacations, having a hot mom, having hot siblings, dressing like a Bieber lesbian, why it’s hard to photograph elephants, and ultimately proves to us that he is capable of vision. Plus! In the VIP Lounge on Friday, get the lowdown on New Years nonsense, and a slew of restaurant reviews:

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