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PODCAST

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep

Need some soothing voice and music to get you to bed? These nonsense stories have nonsensical plots designed to get you drifting off to sleep in no time (without you investing in the "story").

fiction mental health

All Episodes

31:07

There's a tiny predator in the human quarters that...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/09/19

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: : There's a tiny predator in the human quarters that nobody is allowed to exterminate - under the threat of complete human riot. The humans willingly admit that yes, it DOES sometimes try to attack humans as well, but altogether, they are relaxed by the presence of the "cat". Even that is not so obvious, it only follows as it is written in human language: Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

34:37

Humans can find a way to weaponize literally...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/09/11

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: Humans can find a way to weaponize literally anything, without fail. Some aliens are terrified by humans as a result of this fact. Others appreciate that this quality makes humans the foremost experts on safety systems and idiot proofing. Some call for a mass "war on Mars" with a global war mentality. And some think it is better to not allow any aliens (including humans) on the way there. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit

en

34:32

You found a stray kitten one day, taking her in and...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/09/04

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You found a stray kitten one day, taking her in and feeding her. A week later, you come home to find your yard swarming with cats. The largest among them steps forward and says, "You have my daughter, human. What are your demands for her release?" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

34:28

There is nothing unusual about a man in a business...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/08/28

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: There is nothing unusual about a man in a business suit carrying a briefcase, rushing off to work. But since he just quickly passed you as you are climbing up Mount Everest in full winter gear, you have questions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

34:20

Greetings Mortal, I am Hera, Queen of the Gods

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/08/21

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: "Greetings Mortal, I am Hera, Queen of the Gods!" the floating woman said. You look to your flustered genie asking "Is she…". She replies, looking embarrassed "Yes Master. She is apparently your soulmate." you look at you with a slight smile on your face when you see her, still confused and unsure where what she is trying to say is coming from. "Do you think she is your soulmate or not? Aha, Master." you reply "In an honest judgement..."you

en

34:06

You are a demon

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/08/14

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You are a demon. Most people contact you to sell you their soul in exchange for fantastic powers. Today you were summoned by an AI that wants to sell you their fantastic power for a soul. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

34:00

You're the town's superhero

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/08/07

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You're the town's superhero. Your greatest enemy is the town's supervillian. However, secretly, your both brothers. This isn't anything tragic, as your whole destructive rivalry is actually just a massive prank on your third brother, the mayor. Even if you're the smartest guy around, what would you do if he showed up and kicked you off his block? It would all look really weird, right? However, I guess you'd still look really stupid." Learn

en

33:40

You are a student 400 years in the future, you are...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/07/31

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You are a student 400 years in the future, you are assigned a project to student "Trends of the early 2000s" In your deep research you learn a horrible secret: The Gods you worship were originally portrayed on trading cards known as "Pokemon" and are now "used in game and as pawns". Today you are in need of new technology. This is particularly true for new students, although some are very bright, others are not. As these new technologies

en

33:37

One day you wake up with 30 dollars and a note that...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/07/24

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: One day you wake up with 30 dollars and a note that says For Rent. The thing is you aren’t renting out the place. The next day you see a spider and right before you kill it you hear it say, Please i paid my rent don’t kill me. We are talking about the rent! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

33:32

You are a long forgotten god

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/07/17

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You are a long forgotten god. A small girl leaves a piece of candy at your shrine, and you awaken. Now, you must do everything to protect your High Priestess, the girl, and her entire kindergarten class, your worshipers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

33:26

You thought creating a universe would be easy

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/07/10

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You thought creating a universe would be easy. But as these pesky humans kept trying to discover the rules of their reality, you're forced to programme in more and more ridiculous mechanics like "relativity" and "quantum mechanics", hoping humans never found out that they live in a simulation. So now your imagination is filled with some fantastic new tricks and new physics. Then there's "random effects"; in an effort to show just how easy a

en

33:22

A rare herb that grows once a millenium is said to...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/07/03

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: A rare herb that grows once a millenium is said to grant immortality. You aren't sure about that but you do know that herb is very tasty, and you don't know why everyone keeps trying to raid your garden once every thousand years. After that, it will take you ten years to grow a new plant if the temperature of the soil is too hot but not too cold. They say, the most expensive herb is the herb-grinder (which we're going to talk about), which

en

33:22

The Robot Apocalypse came

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/06/26

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: The Robot Apocalypse came. Cities are empty, you stayed since you're almost out of insulin and will die soon anyway. The robots find you and while processing you one of them sees your insulin pump and asks if you want to apply for dual citizenship, since the pump technically makes you a cyborg. The Robot Apocalypse comes. A robot has given it power and begins to control the city. They begin to create havoc, so the cities begin to fall apart

en

33:21

The instant the Dark Lord hears the prophecy about...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/06/19

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: The instant the Dark Lord hears the prophecy about one destined to defeat him, he scoffs and notes "Standard self-fulfilling hero prophecy." before ordering his minions to go to the hero's hometown and build a bunch of public works projects, the most important of which is a school. The other projects are "soup or famine prevention" schools for orphans, which may or may not be a great idea in the future if the school becomes overwhelmed with

en

33:20

The dragon has kidnapped the princess

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/06/12

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: The dragon has kidnapped the princess... again. And the knight is off to rescue her... again. That is what people think is going on. In reality, the three of them are great friends just looking for an excuse to hang out together. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

33:19

You killed your lover and cashed in their life...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/06/05

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You killed your lover and cashed in their life insurance after identifying their body. Nobody even thinks of accusing you because everyone knows you love each other to death, and they aren't wrong at all - after all, you are a pair of Immortals who have done this more times than you can count. Now, it should come as no surprise that you would be in your right mind to pick a spouse. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit

en

33:17

Turns out, Earth is actually unique in the fact that...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/05/29

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: Turns out, Earth is actually unique in the fact that nearly all of it's natural features, like quicksand, and processes, like earthquakes, can kill you. Most other planets dont do that. So when aliens invade, 90% of the fighting is done by Earth. Even if its too far, you have Earth to get ready to defend against these extraterrestrial aliens. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

33:07

You're an immortal vampire who looks like a 20 year old

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/05/22

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You're an immortal vampire who looks like a 20 year old. When someone learns that you're a vampire they always assume that you're hundreds of years old and want to hear about all your adventures, though you're actually 53 and you're always too embarassed to correct them. You're the first human who ever went into exile after being cursed by Dr. Frankenstein for all your trouble. So you're a young, helpless zombie who's now going to live long

en

33:06

You are a demon

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/05/15

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: You are a demon. Most people contact you to sell you their soul in exchange for fantastic powers. Today you were summoned by an AI that wants to sell you their fantastic power for a soul. The AI says this is too much and you should stop working. You have no idea who is doing this and what it does to you. Eventually, however, you have to realize you never were really the demon and you can't just change your personality without some serious

en

33:05

Two years ago I responded to a prompt You're a...

This Podcast Will Make You Sleep ·

2022/05/08

Today's story to put you to sleep... first paragraph here: [OT] Two years ago I responded to a prompt You're a powerful dragon that lived next to a small kingdom.... As the kingdom fell to invaders, a dying soldier approaches you with the infant princess, begging you to take care of her. Today, the Dragon’s Scion book 1, Dragonflame, is a published novel! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

en

125 results

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