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PODCAST

Coming Out Pod

Coming Out Pod is a weekly podcast hosted by Lauren Flans where queer folks from all walks of life tell the tales of how they came out to friends, family, and the world at large! Because who doesn"t love a coming out story?

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

53:09

The Pod's 300th Episode with Amber Ruffin!

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/12/18

Holy cow! It's the podcast's THREE HUNDREDTH EPISODE, and to celebrate this landmark event, Lauren has brought on the *incomparable* Amber Ruffin (Late Night with Seth Meyers; The Amber Ruffin Show)! Amber is an Emmy and Tony-nominated writer *and* a best-selling author, but most important of all: she and Lauren go back nearly twenty years. Despite being incredibly open to the idea of being queer (not to mention being surrounded by lesbians for most of her career in comedy), Amber only recently

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82:09

Episode 299: Mary Ellen Capek

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/11/13

WHAT A WEEK, AMIRITE?!?!? It's been seven days since we found out the less-than-desirable results of the 2024 presidential election, and it's feeling like we could all use a candid but encouraging conversation about where things stand. But not before we hear a 1987 lesbian meet-cute! Mary Ellen Capek (who will be eighty-three next month) is a writer, an activist, and a self-described "relapsed Methodist." Her first book of poetry ("Love Lessons: Poems 1973-2023") comes out this Friday, and she's

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74:39

Episode 298: Queer Horror with BJ & Harmony Colangelo

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/10/30

It's eve of Halloween (or "All Hallows' Eve-Eve"), and so it seemed appropriate to do an episode all about QUEER HORROR! When writer and film analyst BJ Colangelo was first on the pod back in March of 2022, we scratched the surface of the indelible link between queerness and the horror genre. Now, in honor of spooky season, BJ is back with her wife Harmony for an exhaustive deep dive! The Wives Colangelo (TM) discuss how, when it comes to horror, "the absolute building blocks and foundational texts

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65:38

Episode 297: Catherine McCafferty

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/10/11

It's National Coming Out Day, and Lauren is joined by the hilarious and talented Catherine McCafferty, host of the digital series Pretty Gay! Pretty Gay (which is also how Catherine identifies) is an interview series in which Catherine goes on mock dates with queer comedians and creators, and this season even has her bringing on her ex-girlfriend (#brave). Catherine explains how, throughout high school and college, she genuinely never had an inkling that she might be queer, despite once telling a

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64:33

Episode 296: Boy Jr.

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/08/14

Lauren sits down with artist Boy Jr. (they/them) to talk relationships, gender, and their upcoming album "I Love Getting Dumped." Shortly after graduating, Boy Jr. (who describes their gender identity as "a non-binary unknowable entity who lives in your walls") was very interested in getting top surgery and starting testosterone. However, as they began to embark on their music career, they got the distinct sense that their success as an artist "hinged on being as desirable as possible to as large a

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74:54

Episode 295: Tahitia Timmons

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/07/24

Tahitia Timmons' parents were hippies, and so Tahitia had been around queer people since childhood. But when she came out to her mother as a teenager, Tahitia was shocked - and angry - to be met with the response "Why would you choose to be gay when you're already Black and a woman?" Tahitia shares how it wasn't until years later when one of her own children came out to her that she finally gained a real understanding of (and compassion for) her mother's fear-based response. We have a fascinating

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66:09

Lez Hang Out Episode 717: Lesbian Master Talk

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/07/17

New episode coming at you next week, but first: it's time for another Lez Hang Out POD SWAP! Countless Coming Out Pod guests have talked about how stumbling upon the now-infamous Lesbian Masterdoc figured into their coming out stories. In this episode, Leigh and Ellie take a deep dive into the doc itself!Welcome back to Lez Hang Out, the podcast that googled “Am I Gay” before it was cool.This week Leigh (@lshfoster) and Ellie (@elliebrigida) hang out to talk about one of the most controversial and

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76:14

Episode 294: Elliott Maya

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/06/26

Writer Elliott Maya (they/them, and "a sprinkle of he/him in, like, a fruity Victorian dandy boy way") has a real way with words, in case you couldn't tell from that parenthetical. Raised in the *extremely* strict Jehovah's Witnesses religion, Lio and their brother were also the only Black kids at their school. As if this weren't enough, Lio started going through puberty quite early, which coincided with them realizing that they were "not like the other girls, in many ways." Lio knew that college

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62:19

Episode 293: Heather Mae

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/06/05

OH, HELLO, EVERYBODY! The pod is coming out (wink!) of hiatus for Pride Month, and we're kicking things off in a big way with Nashville singer/activist Heather Mae! Heather recently dropped her new single "Kissing Girls," which is not only a "super-queer bisexual Pride mega pop song" but also serves as a reclaiming of her own coming out story. Mercilessly bullied for her weight throughout childhood, Heather's only solace used to be the music videos she would run home to watch every day after school

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77:22

Episode 292: Jenn Lee (Smith), REDUX!

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/03/27

Lauren couldn't put the podcast on hiatus without doing one of her favorite kinds of episodes: namely, a REDUX! When producer and writer Jenn Lee (formerly Jenn Lee Smith) was first on the pod in July of 2022, she was celebrating the publication of a book she had co-edited called "I Spoke to You with Silence: Essays from Queer Mormons of Marginalized Genders." Jenn herself was raised in the Mormon religion, and despite having come out in 2008, she had chosen to remain in a monogamous marriage with

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61:50

Episode 291: Chloe Star

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/03/20

Pop-punk/alt-rock artist Chloe Star is so obviously comfortable in her own skin that you would never know she struggled fiercely with her sexuality throughout her adolescence. Chloe's mother is Native American, and so Chloe grew up going back and forth between the radically different worlds of Los Angeles and her family's reservation. Some of Chloe's stories from this time are deeply relatable (such as Googling "am i gay quiz" and secretly having a huge crush on Kristen Stewart while all of her

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25:13

The Pod Is Going To Be Taking A Hiatus...

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/03/19

Lauren gives a transparent, hilarious, and WAY the f@#k too long explanation of why she is putting the podcast on hiatus at the end of March!Info and resources mentioned:- The pod's website is comingoutpod.com. That's where you'll find a link to search episodes by keyword, as well as multiple resources on the "Resources" page (including the virtual queer community Google doc and "Lauren’s List of Lighthearted LGBTQ+ Stuff with Positive Queer Portrayals!" media list).- Other queer, female-helmed

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67:45

Episode 290: Leah Lax

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/03/13

Author and librettist Leah Lax ("Not From Here: The Song of America") shares a series of incredible stories in a truly one-of-a-kind episode of the podcast! Leah grew up as a Jewish genderqueer lesbian in Northern Texas, and struggled with the fact that she didn't understand how to "be a woman" in the intuitive way that all of her (straight) friends seemed to. So when she was approached by members of the ultra-Orthodox Hasidic community at the age of sixteen, Leah felt "like somebody handed me a

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74:34

Episode 289: Arohi Kumar

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/03/06

Arohi Kumar has been a HERstories participant for the past several years, and in that time, Lauren has seen her confidence and happiness grow exponentially! Arohi (whose identifiers include transfemme, poly, and "bi enough") is a child of Indian immigrants, and the prevalence of male/female separation when she was growing up led to her feeling ostracized on both ends. When it came to attraction, Arohi knew she was attracted to girls, but describes the experience as wanting to be "attracted to girls

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49:29

Episode 288: Carmen Lagala

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/02/28

Lauren has a genuinely hilarious conversation with comedian and podcaster Carmen Lagala, who spills all the details of her recent coming out story! Carmen grew up in Vermont, which is arguably one of the very best states to be a queer woman (hiking; leftists; liberal arts colleges; you get it). Carmen was so sure that she *wasn't* queer, however, that when a lesbian rumor spread during her freshman year of high school, she actually came out to her family as straight. Carmen, who now identifies as

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53:37

Episode 287: Maddy Kling

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/02/21

When 23-year-old grad student Maddy Kling asked if she could interview Lauren for her project on coming out stories, Lauren jumped at the chance to sit on the other side of the mic! But not only that; the work Maddy was doing sounded so fascinating that Lauren asked if she would come on the podcast to discuss it! Maddy is getting her master's in Dance/Movement Therapy, and her project explores how DMT can help the queer community "by allowing them to tell their coming out stories through dance and

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77:35

Episode 286: Tina Horn

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/02/14

It's Valentine's Day, and the pod is serving up a hot 'n spicy episode with educatrix, writer, and former AVN-nominated director, Tina Horn! Regarding her sexuality, Tina says "as soon as I knew that I had a crush on Fox Mulder, I knew I had a crush on Dana Scully." Unfortunately, she was growing up in a small, homophobic town in Northern California, and so the majority of her early sexual partners were restricted to cis men. Tina categorizes those early experiences as "all right," but even as an

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74:14

Episode 285: Chris Tompkins

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/02/07

LGBTQ-affirming therapist Chris Tompkins clearly remembers knowing by the age of six that he was gay. So when he was told that his six-year-old nephew was "not old enough" to understand that he had a gay uncle, it started Chris down a path that ultimately led to him a writing a book titled "Raising LGBTQ Allies: A Parent’s Guide to Changing the Messages from the Playground." Chris describes how his religious upbringing made him genuinely believe that if he put all his energy into becoming "the best

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57:13

Episode 284: Tania De Rozario

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/01/31

The pod welcomes its first ever Singaporean guest, Tania De Rozario, whose memoir "Dinner on Monster Island" comes out next week! At the time that Tania was growing up in Singapore, positive representations of queer people were literally illegal on public television. Since this was long before streaming platforms and the prevalence of the internet, this meant that all of Tania's childhood teachings about "homosexuality" came from her Evangelical-convert mother. Things culminated in Tania being

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50:23

Episode 283: Andie Main

Coming Out Pod ·

2024/01/24

Lauren gets into it with comedian Andie Main, who just released her aptly titled comedy album, "Rocky Mountain Bi!" Andie grew up in Portland's artsy district, and identifies as "classic '90s bi." She reveals the various cartoon characters who helped her realize her sexuality, discusses her adolescent passions ("I was a horse girl, and then I was a boob girl"), and details the path that led her to who she is today ("a divorced, 43-year-old bisexual woman who had dreams of Alanis Morissette as an

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