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Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists

Husband and Wife are two non-believers who have always wanted to read the Bible. Why would we subject ourselves to this you might ask? From our perspective it helps us understand where the Christians around us, here in the Midwest, are coming from when they quote the Bible at us. Husband is basically an Atheist and wife leans Agnostic but mostly Atheist and we’re just having some fun at the Bible’s expense while learning more about what our neighbors claim we’re going to hell over. Hosted on Acast

religion & spirituality philosophy

All Episodes

30:32

What the Macaroni?

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2026/01/07

So… we accidentally finished 1 Maccabees. Like, fully. The last chapter. The end. Nobody noticed. Because we are professionals (derogatory). This episode is the frantic, hilarious cleanup where we admit we didn’t plan ahead, then immediately pretend it was all part of the bit, welcome to “What the Macaroni”, aka “what the hell happens between the Old Testament ending and the New Testament showing up like it owns the place.” We dig into the Intertestamental Period, those “400 silent years” that

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24:33

1 Maccabees Chapter 16: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2026/01/06

Simon “I’m too old for this shit” Maccabee finally taps out and hands the family blood-feud business to his sons, because nothing says “healthy succession plan” like immediate warfare and a leadership hand-off sponsored by help from heaven (sure, Jan). John (a.k.a. “Johnny Boy,” because this book refuses to give anyone a unique name) marches out with 20,000 troops to deal with Kendabias, and somehow the most dramatic obstacle is… a brook. A whole army is terrified to cross a brook. Not a raging

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40:19

1 Maccabees Chapters 11 - 15 Q&A: Bible Study by...

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2026/01/05

Pronouns? Useless. Names? Recycled like a church bulletin. In this 1 Maccabees 11–15 Q&A, we finally stop the “he said to him who said to him” madness long enough to make a damn Seleucid cheat sheet, because this book is basically Mike and Bob: Hellenistic Edition. Demetrius I is dead (yes, dead), Demetrius II is the current problem, Antiochus VI is a puppet kid, and Antiochus VII rolls in like “I’d like Judea back, please.”Jonathan spends Chapter 11 playing kingmaker and switching allegiances

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22:47

Chronicles’ Post-Exile PR Spin

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/31

If you’ve ever wondered why the Bible tells the same story twice, once like a gritty crime documentary and once like a motivational church brochure, this one’s for you. We pit 1–2 Samuel + 1–2 Kings (the Deuteronomistic “everything is awful and here’s why we deserved it” edition) against 1–2 Chronicles (the post-exile “we can rebuild, babes” rewrite), and the contrast is chef’s kiss for anyone who enjoys theological side-eye.In Samuel/Kings, the vibe is tragic realism: “Why did we lose our land?”

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24:00

1 Maccabees Chapter 14: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/30

Demetrius finally gets scooped up like a sad little political Pokémon, and the text immediately slams the fast-forward button into “and then everything was chill forever” mode… allegedly. 1 Maccabees 14 is basically propaganda karaoke: Simon gets credited with “peace,” while the chapter quietly admits he took cities, removed “uncleannesses,” and ran off anyone inconvenient, because nothing says stability like “no one resisted him.”Then we get the biblical equivalent of corporate email chains: Rome

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29:56

1 Maccabees Chapter 13: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/29

Simon steps up after Jonathan’s betrayal-and-capture situation turns into a full-on “Greek politics but make it messy” episode. 1 Maccabees 13 opens with panic—Trifon’s marching, everyone’s terrified, then Simon does the classic leader move: pep talk, fortify Jerusalem, and start tossing people out of cities like it’s a casual hobby (“Simon says get the f*ck out” becomes the unofficial theme). Then comes the ransom plot that screams “This will definitely work”—Trifon claims Jonathan’s being detained

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1:20:56

1 Maccabees Chapter 10: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/18

This week on Sacrilegious Discourse, we slog through 1 Maccabees 10, a chapter that’s basically Game of Thrones if every character was a walking pronoun problem and every plot twist was solved with a gift basket. Alexander Epiphanes shows up, grabs territory, and Demetrius responds like a petty ex—“NO, I’M the king!”—and suddenly everyone’s trying to buy Jonathan’s loyalty like he’s the swing state of Judea.The highlight: political bribery dressed up as “friendship.” One guy offers tax breaks and

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47:28

1 Maccabees Chapter 9: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/16

This week on Sacrilegious Discourse, we crack open 1 Maccabees 9 and immediately get hit with seasonal chaos (“Jingle bell, jingle bell…”), plus a refresher rant about the book’s absolute felony-level pronoun abuse. Husband and Wife are begging the text to pick a “they” and stay there—because it keeps swapping who the subject is mid-sentence like it’s trying to start a fight.Chapter-wise, the big headline is: Judas goes full macho “die with honor” mode instead of doing the sensible thing (retreat,

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30:38

1 Maccabees Chapter 8: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/15

1 Maccabees 8 is basically ancient geopolitics with the world’s worst pronoun problem. We spend half the episode doing live “pronoun triage” just to figure out who’s conquering whom (again). At one point, the text produces a sentence so cursed you both stop to verbally stare at it in disgust. Then the chapter swerves into full Roman propaganda: “Rome is so valiant… and also valiant… and did we mention valiant?”—plus a highlight reel of Roman wins (Spain mines, elephants, tribute, yada yada) while we

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37:11

1 Maccabees Chapter 5: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/04

Judas Maccabeus is back, and this time he’s on full genocidal tour mode. In 1 Maccabees 5, our hosts walk through a chapter that reads less like “faith heroism” and more like “war crime highlight reel” — burning people alive in towers, slaughtering “all the males,” torching temples, and then calling it holy victory. They dig into how the text frames this as righteous defense while clearly crossing the line into mass murder, drawing sharp (and uncomfortable) parallels to modern “we’re just defending

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33:13

1 Maccabees Chapter 4: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/02

Judas Maccabeus is back on his murder tour, and 1 Maccabees 4 turns him into the ancient Near Eastern John Wick with a Bible plug. The hosts walk through Judas outsmarting “Gorgeous” Gorgias and his chosen cavalry (which obviously implies there’s a sad pile of very unchosen horse guys somewhere), dunk on the propaganda-level casualty reports, and side-eye a story where thousands of enemies die and somehow not a single Israelite stubbed a toe.Once the bodies hit the floor, the text swerves hard into

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1:02:25

1 Maccabees Chapter 3: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/12/01

In this episode, the heathen duo dive into 1 Maccabees 3, where Judas Maccabeus rolls up in his giant breastplate, steals a fancy sword, and proceeds to “defend God’s law” by killing a lot of people—aka, the Bible’s favorite hobby. They recap how Antiochus IV Epiphanes tried to erase Jewish identity, desecrate the temple, and outlaw all the “penis-chopping things” (circumcision), then follow the narrative as Judas is framed as a heroic lion… who also sounds suspiciously like the protagonist of a

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58:32

Enoch Warm-Up

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/10/29

We’re pre-gaming Enoch—the apocryphal fever dream Christians can’t stop half-quoting when angels get horny and giants show up. Consider this your atheist field guide to the Watchers, their disastrous “heavenly HR violations,” and how this book helped turbocharge demon lore, apocalyptic fanfic, and every YouTuber who thinks fallen angels invented metallurgy just to ruin your day.We also get into why Enoch didn’t make the Protestant cut, how it still haunts modern theology, and the messy overlap with

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42:52

Life of Adam and Eve Part 2

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/10/08

We pick up where things got gloriously unhinged: Eve gives birth and the kid stands up and sprints off like the Gingerbread Man. Yes, still canon in this wild text. From there, the hosts unpack why the scene mentions “twelve angels and two virtues” (no, not moral traits—an angelic rank), then riff on hierarchy, bowing, and celestial office politics. It’s irreverent, nerdy, and exactly the kind of Pseudepigrapha detour we live for.Adam then launches into a sweeping prophecy dump—Temple, dispersion,

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27:41

We Finished the Old Testament!

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/09/10

Cue the confetti: we officially wrapped the Old Testament—and yes, we took a moment of celebratory silence (not prayer… obviously) before plotting what’s next. This one’s an on-air planning sesh where we celebrate the milestone and lay out how we’ll untangle the Bible’s utterly bonkers ordering—because the OT you grew up with is the same content as the Hebrew Bible, just shuffled by theology and tradition rather than history.We break down Tanakh = Torah + Nevi’im + Ketuvim (law, prophets, writings)

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43:35

Malachi Chapter 3: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/08/20

Malachi 3: Tithes, Threats, and That Petty Little “God’s Naughty List”📝 Episode Summary:We dive headfirst into Malachi 3—the Old Testament’s penultimate guilt trip—where God allegedly sends a “messenger,” talks about refiner’s fire, and then pivots straight into shaking down the peasants for tithes. Yes, the chapter that prosperity preachers love to tattoo on their wallets makes a cameo, and we drag it appropriately. We also point out the weird chapter break (why does 3 basically start in 2?)

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1:22:02

Moon Sh!t and Menstrual Calendars

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/07/23

Moon Shit and Menstrual Calendars: How Judaism Synced Up with Space📝 Episode Summary:Strap in for a lunar-laced detour from our usual Bible bashing as we dive headfirst into ancient Israel’s moon obsession, and no, not in a sexy Wiccan way. This isn’t your typical “let’s stare at the stars” moment. We’re talking about how the Jewish calendar was built around the moon’s ass and how fire poles, moon seekers, and period-powered mysticism ended up shaping entire holy festivals. Yeah, it’s weird. Yeah,

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1:20:52

Zechariah Wrap Up: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/06/28

Zechariah's Prophetic Fever Dream: Donkeys, Flying Scrolls, and the Jesus Retcon📝 Episode Summary:Hold onto your chariots, folks—this episode is a wild theological autopsy of Zechariah, where prophecy, PTSD, and political propaganda come together like a DIY apocalypse starter kit. The hosts finally wrap up the Book of Zechariah, dissecting its two-part structure (First Zechariah: dreams and dates, Second Zechariah: undated messianic mayhem) while dunking on the absurd Christian rewrites that claim

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1:20:09

God’s Top 10 Kill Streaks (episode 1)

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/06/23

Lot’s Wife, Onan’s Pullout Fail, and the Egyptian Baby Massacre📝 Episode Summary:Welcome to the blood-splattered kickoff of our new series, “God’s Top 10 Kill Streaks – Old Testament Edition,” where your favorite heathens dive headfirst into Yahweh’s most unhinged murder sprees. Starting at number 10, we salt-shame Lot’s wife who was turned into a sodium statue for the crime of looking back while her hometown gets nuked. That’s right: no name, no dialogue, just divine vaporization for having a

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36:50

Zechariah Chapter 14: Bible Study by Atheists

Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists ·

2025/06/20

Zechariah’s End-Times Dumpster Fire: Rape, Rotting Flesh, and Holy Crockpots📝 Episode Summary:Brace yourselves, heathens, we’ve reached the flaming finale of Zechariah, and boy, does it go out with a bang (and some divine rot). In this final chapter, God makes sure Jerusalem is properly plundered, the women are raped (again—because Yahweh loves a war crime), and half the city gets dragged into exile before He bothers to lift a celestial finger. The hosts dive headfirst into the horror show,

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