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PODCAST

Sexvangelicals

Jeremiah Gibson and Julia Postema

Sexvangelicals is a podcast about the sex education the church didn"t want you to have, hosted by Julia and Jeremiah, two licensed and certified sex therapists.

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

58:11

S10E1: How to Say Goodbye Well

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/10/13

Over the last four years, we've written podcast episodes about the sex education the church didn't want you to have. One of the most threatening things for a high-control religious system is a goodbye, which results in actual transitions away from these groups that are secretive, forced, and avoidant. In this episode, we describe an intentional, proper goodbye, from the perspective of how we structure intentional final sessions with our clients. Also, this is the last official episode of

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01:00:20

S9E11: Ask a Sex Therapist: Does Body Count Actually...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/09/29

This summer, we've answered the most common questions that we receive as relationship and sex therapists. And this week, we answer one of the most common questions: Does body count actually count? We live in a culture that views your sexuality based on how often you access it. Men who are deemed to have accessed sexuality a lot are viewed as "studs". Women are simultaneously valued and devalued based on how often they have sex. In Evangelical systems, folks who have sex before they get married are

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01:01:54

S9E10: Ask a Sex Therapist: What If I Think I Am (or...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/09/03

This summer, we're reflecting on the ten most common questions we hear from our relationship and sex therapy clients. We often hear folks talk about their sexuality in negative ways, comparing their sexuality, consumption of porn, and masturbation practices to that of addiction. We self-diagnose as sex addicts, or we diagnose our partners as sex or porn addicts. And in doing so, we eliminate the opportunity for curiosity, to learn about our fantasies, our curiosities, our erotic templates, and

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46:47

S9E09: Ask a Sex Therapist: What Happens if I Come...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/08/19

This summer, we're reflecting on the ten most common questions we hear from our relationship and sex therapy clients. Growing up in a high control religious space means that queer people often have to repress their sexuality, and may not come out until their late 20s, 30s, or later, which has significant impacts on sexuality and relationship development. We are thrilled to have Dr. Joe Kort, host of the Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast and author of Side Guys, to talk with us about

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35:48

S9E08: Ask a Sex Therapist: What Happens at a Play...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/07/29

This summer, we're reflecting on the ten most common questions we hear from our relationship and sex therapy clients. In the last few years, we've increasingly heard couples asking about play parties, sex parties, cuddle parties, and the like. Opportunities to practice touch, sexuality, and play in intentional spaces. We are thrilled to have Ally Iseman, founder of Passport2Pleasure, as our guest. Ally helps couples and communities organize play spaces, establish clear expectations for what happens

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01:04:42

S9E07: Ask a Sex Therapist: What if I Want to Have...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/05/19

This spring, Julia and Jeremiah are answering ten of the most common questions they hear from clients, exvangelicals, and the larger cultural zeitgeist. One of the most common questions is "What if I want to have sex with other people?" In this episode, Julia and Jeremiah are joined by Becs Waite and Jimmy Bridges from the practice This Space Between to talk about factors, considerations, and first steps for those interested in opening up their relationship. Join Julia, Jeremiah, Becs, and

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57:15

S9E06: Ask a Sex Therapist: What Do I Need to...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/05/04

This spring, we are answering ten of the most common questions that we hear as sex therapists. This week, we're exploring the question, "What do I need to consider when I have sex for the first time?" We created six different scenarios that a person might have for the first time: A general first time sexual experience, and considering what you disclose (and don't disclose) ahead of time. Oral sex and stimulating another person's clitoris or penis A same-sex sexual experience. Anal sex. A

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52:34

Episode S9E05: Ask a Sex Therapist: How Do I Have My...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/04/21

This spring, Julia and Jeremiah are answering the ten most common questions that we receive as sex therapists. In this episode, they explore the question, "How do I have my first orgasm?" If you haven't had an orgasm before and you want to have orgasms, messages about "just taking it off the pedestal" and focusing on other areas of pleasure can be really minimizing and dismissive, even if, in the long run, they are helpful. J+J are joined by the amazing Erica Smith, sex educator and founder of

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46:21

S9E04: Ask a Sex Therapist: What Happens if Sex...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/04/06

This spring, Julia and Jeremiah are answering ten of the most common questions they hear from clients, exvangelicals, and the larger cultural zeitgeist. One of the most common questions is "What happens if sex hurts?" In this episode, Julia and Jeremiah are joined by Dr. Camden Morgante (@drcamden on Instagram), author of the new book Recovering from Purity Culture. They reflect on how to address and reduce the physical and emotional pain that a repressive situation or larger culture, such as

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01:00:51

S9E03: Ask a Sex Therapist: Does Planning Sex Kill...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/03/24

This spring, Julia and Jeremiah are answering ten of the most common questions they hear from clients, exvangelicals, and the larger cultural zeitgeist. One of the most common questions is "Does planning sex kill the vibe?" In this episode, Julia and Jeremiah talk about the distinctions between planned and spontaneous sex. While many of us desire spontaneous sex, the reality is that, for many of us, sex is more planned than we might realize. And that's fantastic! Join Julia and Jeremiah for a

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57:05

S9E02: Ask a Sex Therapist: Are My Genitals the Star...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/03/10

This spring, we're answering the most common questions that we receive about s*xuality. A lot of questions revolve around our genitals. How are they supposed to look? How are they supposed to function? What happens if they don't function the way that they're "supposed to function"? In this episode, we challenge three assumptions about our genitals. Your worth as a human being is defined by how your genitals look or function. The thing that lets us know we've had a successful s*xual experience is

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40:08

S9E01: Ask a Sex Therapist: Can My Relationship...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/02/24

Deconstruction is the process of re-evaluating the worldview and behavioral expectations of a specific community. Talking openly about sexual experiences that exist outside of purity culture dictates is one of the fastest ways that a couple from a high control religious context may begin deconstructing. Season 9 of Sexvangelicals explores ten of the most commonly asked questions that we receive as sex therapists. And it starts with perhaps the most stress-inducing question of all: Can my

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02:26

Ask a Sex Therapist Trailer

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/02/21

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34:22

Bonus Re-Release: Loving, Living, and Leaving the...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/02/18

We are thrilled to re-release part two of our conversation with NPR National Correspondent Sarah McCammon. Sarah is the author of the book The Exvangelicals: Loving, Living, and Leaving the White Evangelical Church. In the age of a second Trump presidency, it's imperative that we discuss the history of the Evangelical Church and politics, purity culture, gender performance, and healing. In part two of our re-release we discuss how there are a lot of memoirs, social media comments, and dialogue

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43:14

Bonus Re-Release: Loving, Living, and Leaving the...

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/02/10

Last March, we had the opportunity of interviewing NPR national correspondent Sarah McCammon discussing the strategy and implementation of rigid conservative values in her book The Exvangelicals: Loving, Living, and Leaving the White Evangelical Church. We are re-releasing both our conversations with Sarah in honor of the paperback release on February 18th. In this episode, we discuss the relationship between Trump and Evangelicals, the rise of religious NONES, why folks stay in EMPish

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03:58

Moving from Deconstruction to Reconstruction Trailer

Sexvangelicals ·

2025/01/13

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53:03

Episode #86: Letting the Dust Settle: Finding Your...

Sexvangelicals ·

2024/12/30

Letting the dust settle allows us to step out of the reactionary space and evaluate our own lives and relationships. In our final episode of the series "How to Practice Social Justice Without Being a Jackass", Julia and Jeremiah talk about how to make decisions based on values that are important to you and your family system. A proactive process, rather than reactive process, also makes it easier to make relationships with people who align with your values. Check out our conversations about:

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51:01

Episode #85: Letting the Dust Settle: Grieving...

Sexvangelicals ·

2024/12/02

We close our series on How to Practice Social Justice This Election Season with a two-part episode called "Letting the Dust Settle". We now know the outcome of the election. For many folks, there's an enormous amount of fear, anxiety, and dread about the behavior and decisions of the incoming administration. There's also a tendency, especially on social media, to respond to every negative step that the Trump administration makes. In these two episodes, we distinguish between a reactive sense of

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01:04:53

Episode #84: How to Have Relationships with People...

Sexvangelicals ·

2024/10/29

We've tried to hold two seemingly oppositional positions during our podcast series "How to Practice Social Justice This Election Season Without Being a Jackass". 1) We do not support fascism, most notably showcased by the 2024 Republican Party. 2) We support having relationships with people who think differently (and may vote differently) than we do. To help us navigate this, we invited Sarah and Nippy from the A Little Bit Culty (@alittlebitculty) Podcast to join us. They talk with us about

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01:14:16

Episode #83: How to Navigate the Tension Between...

Sexvangelicals ·

2024/10/22

For many Exvangelicals, there's an enormous pressure to move into spaces of advocacy for civil rights, especially two weeks before the 2024 Presidential Election. However, advocacy can easily replicate systems of criticism, moral superiority, and shaming, especially when there's un- or under-addressed fear, trauma, anger. We're thrilled to have Sally Gary (@sallygary) and Karen Keen (keen.kr) from Centerpeace (@centerpeaceinc) to talk with us about how to navigate the tension between advocacy and

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