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PODCAST

Couples Therapy In Seven Words

Dr. Bruce Chalmer

Be Kind, Don‘t Panic, and Have Faith. Psychologist Dr. Bruce Chalmer and educator Judy Alexander talk about relationships, interview fascinating guests, and answer your questions.

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

44:08

Parent Rx – How to Communicate with Your Child: An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/11/07

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/6po5SBY5QMQ.How can you talk to your kids to soothe them and get through to them, rather than shut them down? Our guest in this episode, Dr. David Marcus, has worked with families dealing with high-conflict divorce, and advocated for children with courts and family lawyers. He tells us about his work, including a very moving story about silent sessions with a 15-year-old girl, and the delightful sport of “Mad Ball.” Dr. Marcus’s website is

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35:37

Marrying America: An Interview with Jeremy Nelson

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/10/31

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/vhzae0ucbjQ.What’s the difference between dating and courting? Why do so many women pick guys on dating apps who later turn out to be bad husband material? Our guest in this episode, Jeremy Nelson, has created a dating app with a very different approach, one that promotes intentional courtship with a view toward marriage, rather than hook-ups. Jeremy’s website is https://marryingamerica.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our

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51:08

A Family Story of Anorexia: An Interview with Nancy...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/10/24

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/7FQ3i_dWbBk.Our guests in this episode, Nancy Levine and Rachel Levine Spates, are a mother and daughter who collaborated on a book called Light: A Family Story of Anorexia. Their book is a beautifully written, insightful, and courageous recounting of Rachel’s struggle with anorexia, and how their family was affected. The book is available anywhere books are sold. Here’s the Amazon link:

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44:28

The Passion Paradox: Can Passionate Love Last?

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/10/17

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/KD19fzxYYgg.What happened to the passionate love you had when you first got together? Is it possible for that kind of love to last? We talk about Bruce’s latest book, The Passion Paradox: When You Feel Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other. It’s a workbook that helps couples find their passion again, or if not, to decide how to move on. The paradox of the title refers to the needs we have for both stability and intimacy; we need them both, but

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27:26

Soulful Power: An Interview with Christian de la Huerta

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/10/10

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/TjcflWWUghM.Our guest in this episode, Christian de la Huerta, talks about his own journey toward spiritual transformation, and how he helps people along their own journeys. His most recent books are Awakening the Soul of Power: How to Live Heroically and Set Yourself Free and Conscious Love: Transforming Our Relationship to Relationships. Christian’s website is https://soulfulpower.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast

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24:43

The Meta-Serenity Prayer

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/10/03

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/cXEgVCnBIq4.You’ve heard of the Serenity Prayer, especially in the context of 12-Step programs such as AA. But what is the Meta-Serenity Prayer? In this episode, we talk about it. Why did Bruce invent it? What does it have to do with faith? Along the way, we also talk about what kind of couples therapy might actually help you, as opposed to wasting your time or making things worse. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to

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44:33

From Hot Mess to Therapist: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/09/26

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/xvDCFU85faA.Our guest in this episode, Caroline Kobylinski, overcame a history of emotional chaos, substance use, eating disorders, and toxic relationships. She’s applied what she learned through those struggles to helping both individual clients and couples. And she does it with humor and refreshing forthrightness. We had a lot of fun talking with Caroline. Caroline’s website is http://www.cwkcounseling.com. Do you have ideas for topics or

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38:56

Dating in Your 40s and 50s: An Interview with Padmini...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/09/19

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/UG6QrQsK-Uo.Our guest in this episode, Padmini Pandya, has lived and worked all over the world. She shares her experiences, especially in the area of relationships. Padmini’s website is https://www.youtube.com/@PiecesOfMissMini. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer’s newsletter right from our homepage. Our sponsor is The Blue Tent: Erotic

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54:54

Rebuilding Intimacy After Shame: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/09/12

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/7rhyEG5S260.Pornography can be addictive. Our guest in this episode, Chandler Rogers, has founded Relay, an app that helps people with their recovery. We talk about Chandler’s own experience that led him to found the app, how connecting with other people in an atmosphere of supportive acceptance can help heal the shame, and ways couples can rebuild their relationships after a partner discovers behavior they experience as a betrayal. Chandler’s

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57:47

What If Therapy It’s Not Therapy You Need? An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/09/07

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/VuKfsIb8Fe4. Is everyone mentally ill? Or is it possible that most of us need support from a caring human being, rather than treatment of a diagnosed illness? Our guest in this episode, Dr. Alison Greco, is reanimating an idea from last century: paratherapy. She is training people in what she calls Structured Emotional Support, to provide help for people who might need psychotherapy, but want help. Alison’s website is https://para-thera.com/. Do

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33:55

You’re Miles Apart and Still Love Each Other: Now What?

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/08/17

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/i3vNYsGMDtc.Why do couples so often start off passionately in love, and over time end up feeling miles apart? And if you’re in that situation, what can you do about it? In this episode, we talk about how that happens and how to deal with it. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer’s newsletter right from our homepage. Our sponsor is The Blue

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48:43

Overcoming Shame: An Interview with Malisa Hepner

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/08/08

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/B4933wXvmY8.Our guest in this episode, Malisa Hapner, told us she maxed out the Adverse Childhood Experiences questionnaire—which means she went through an enormous load of trauma. Judy and I found her journey of overcoming shame and finding compassion for herself and others to be inspiring, and I hope you do too. Malisa’s website is https://linktr.ee/Mdhepner. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and

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01:06:30

Managing Conflict in Relationships: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/08/01

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/s5dehbrTc84.Why are couples surprised when they first experience conflict with each other. And how can they manage it without freaking out? Our guest in this episode, Dr. Jessica Higgins, works with couples to help them get past problem patterns and turn toward each other. Dr. Higgins’s website is https://drjessicahiggins.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also

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50:46

It’s Not About the Dishwasher: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/07/25

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/qcNpMScyLWE.I’ve worked with couples for whom how to load the dishwasher has been the topic that has brought them close to divorce. What’s going on? Our guest in this episode, Talia Bombola, applies insights from psychodynamic therapy to help couples and individuals figure out what’s going on, and save themselves from a lot of misery in the process. Talia’s websites are https://www.therapywithtalia.com/ and https://taliabombola.com/. Do you

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42:41

Spaghetti on the Wall: An Interview with Kristan Swan

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/07/18

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/oSYU5GCa0YM.Our guest in this episode, Kristan Swan, has been a landscape designer and business coach. We talk about how her work helping entrepreneurs has often overlapped with the kind of relational work that Bruce does with couples. Kristan’s book Spaghetti on the Wall is designed to help people learn more about themselves and thereby make better decisions. She has also developed an eight-week workshop called “Discovering Your Spiritual

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40:33

Two Jewish Boomers Visit Germany and Talk About...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/07/11

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/NFNHWEpG2nM.In my book Betrayal and Forgiveness, I define forgiveness as an “inside job.” Among other things, that means that you can forgive people who have committed acts of pure evil—because forgiving just means you can think about what happened without being consumed by anger or panic. Forgiveness is about healing yourself. To paraphrase Anne Lamott, forgiveness gets the rat poison out of you. Then you can think about how to handle the

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40:39

Food, Family, and Memories: An Interview with Joan...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/07/03

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/inmBJ6AlwNU.Judy and I had the great honor and delight of interviewing the doyenne of Jewish cooking, Joan Nathan. Our interview took place on a cruise along the Main River in Germany, where we were on a tour of Jewish historical sites along the Main and Rhine. Joan was on the tour, and we all had the magnificent experience of a bistro meal with her, using her own recipes. We’ll be doing another episode about how the experience of touring

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41:12

Solutions for ADHD Couples: An Interview with Lisa...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/06/13

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/B7buGaYYF98.Couples in which one or both have a diagnosis of ADHD can encounter some particular challenges. Our guest in this episode, Lisa Rabinowitz, specialized in working with ADHD or otherwise neurodiverse couples. She tells us about how she helps them find their way to more satisfying relationships. Lisa’s website is https://counselorforcouples.com/. The assessment tool that Bruce mentioned is at https://forms.gle/1Pj8MUQDH2cYfbVW7. Please

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05:00

Short Take #5: Betrayal and Forgiveness

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/06/09

Welcome to Short Take #5. In this series Judy and I talk about some of our (well, mostly my) favorite topics in bite-size morsels.Today’s topic: Betrayal and Forgiveness This short take is about…well, betrayal and forgiveness. What is betrayal? And does forgiveness mean you’ll restore your relationship? Please subscribe and review us! Visit our podcast website, ctin7.com, for more about our podcast, access to past episodes, and links to contact us to make suggestions and sign up for a time to be

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48:21

Does Therapy Culture Discourage Millennials from...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/06/06

For the video of this episode, go to https://youtu.be/OtUSEC7Fk58.Why are so many Millennials deciding not to have children? How does therapy culture affect how young people view the prospect of becoming parents? Judy and I talk about a New York Times article by Michal Leibowitz that discusses this. She organized her article according to stanzas in Philip Larkin’s poem “This Be The Verse,” which famously concludes, “Get out as early as you can / And don’t have any kids yourself.” Along the way, we

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