PODCAST

Ficta Inferno

Maya Baker

Dramatic readings of terrible fanfictions/fiction from the internet

fiction comedy fiction

All Episodes

02:08:17

Bad Blood Part 1 (When did Harry get a gun!?!?)

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/09/06

As we get into spooky season, we start the crossover of the Walking Dead and Harry Potter. Did we ask for this? Not really...but let’s start the madness!

01:21:50

PXrn Princess Episode 5 (0/10 would not recommend...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/08/30

With our final episode (for now) of PXrn Princess coming to an end, we are left with questions and more irritation. I don't think I've hated a character more, considering this is all original and just blah. We will return when we've gathered out wits and unlocked more...since I ain't paying no cash for this pile of trash. Next Sunday we'll be diving into a whole new story, of zombies and wands.

01:31:33

Pxrn Princess Episode 4 (When I say shotgun you say...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/08/23

We delve deeper into rants on just how unstable Mary-Sue Ivy Lynn is and just what it is she does at the tattoo shop. We're still not entertained nor amused by her, and apparently no one can do anything unless she is there or it is said in front of her. Just one more episode after this and we will be taking a bit of a break to...digest...whatever it is that has gone on here. Also, in social media news, we now have a Tik-Tok if any of you are interested. See more of our hi-jinks at

01:29:27

Pxrn Princess Episode 3 (I can’t even anymore with...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/08/16

Nothing really progresses. There’s a lame attempt at humor followed by the author obviously trying to set up a multitude of relationships up for later. We later come to ask ourselves why we are here, where we are going, and when will the suffering end? And Paul’s back!

01:50:58

PXrn Princess Episode 2 (There’s a very series lack...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/08/09

Oooohh we’ve got a badass here! Not really though: Mary-Sue Lynn Whatever Her Name Is lives the thug life(?) but it’s just really confusing to her character and we still have no idea who half of the people in this story are, but they keep treating us like old friends that know EXACTLY who we are, how we like our drinks mixed, and say our name as we walk through the door- we are too embarrassed to say I know none of them. There’s also a bunch of moments that go ‘This couldn’t have possibly happened

01:29:01

Pxrn Princess Episode 1

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/08/02

It's original fiction time again, and let's just say hold onto your hats as we roll into the world of the porn industry and chubby chasers...as according to an author who can't use the right there/they're/their or here/hear to save her God damn life. Ivy (her name will be forgotten often) is a triple threat of an artist living with her roommate Aubrey and is next door neighbor's to one of her favorite authors (surprise surprise). Everything gets twisted turned upside down as a Porn Star and Porn

00:51:13

The One Where They F@ck The Raptor (Raptor Carer Part 2)

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/07/26

Just a warning here, there is a graphic depiction of a character engaging in sexual intercourse with...a...um...dinosaur...it sure is something traumatizing for us all! The main character (whose name is forgettable) accepts her new reality rather instantaneously. The danger that gets introduced here never gets mentioned again, at least there's an ending to this madness.

01:17:28

The One Where They DON'T F@ck The Raptor (Raptor...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/07/19

Not even in our wildest dreams would we think that someone would make a fan-fic like this, it's utterly...strange. Without any spoilers for the whole story, the first part involves a Mary-Sure, ripped actions from the film, and then a whole bunch of other weirdness involving raptors. It doesn't get freaky this time around to say the least.

01:02:20

True Love Never Dies (MIKE NOOTON RETURNS!!!)

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/07/12

Will we ever understand the purpose of some of these fics? Bella is a cheerleader (again), Mike is somehow the love interest, and Edward is the new kid in town (his eyes are red?). At least this time Edward sounds like a person talking normally, thought the same cannot be said for Bella.

00:52:55

FaCe ThE StRaNgE Part 4 (Short read BUT SERIOUSLY IT...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/07/05

Never has there been more of a tale of woe, than Dally and her edgelord harem...finally they get on with the plan, Harry kidnaps a baby, Heiei and Dally's relationship isn't all sunshine and sparkles, we get another new character that shows up for like one chapter, and then we get a strange and lackluster sort of ending that just...ends, but it's still an ending nonetheless.

01:06:05

FaCe ThE StRaNgE Part 3 (Edward is a NICE GUY and HOW...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/06/28

God the writing is still bad and the language is just foul; like how can someone write this much trash??? Edward fuels the belief of the friend zone and Harry is into some heavy drugs apparently.

01:18:55

FaCe ThE StRaNgE Part 2 (How many pregnancies have to...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/06/21

So we're at part two and it is far more confusing than what the Readers thought it would have been. Yikes we've got more drama, baby daddy drama, fusion drama, death drama, and mama drama. That's not even all of it, my soul is dead inside. Just take me now Satan! Also more of our auditions to be in a death metal band!

00:56:21

FaCe ThE StRaNgE Part 1 (Ma’m there’s too many...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/06/14

A Harry Potter based Fan-Fiction which is someone’s deluded equivalent of Blood Raining Night. Dally (Delly, Delhi, Della, Bella) just found out she’s a witch on top of being a vampire! Thus she goes to Hogwarts and begins an adventure with a useless Edward Cullen, an anthropomorphic hedgehog, and far too many anime husbandos.

01:06:40

I Will Be Beautiful (The one where we're kind of...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/06/07

Oh boy, how to even explain this one? Only a few chapters in and we're banging our heads against the wall. Meet Jackie, a Freshman in High School who has no other character trait than being overweight and having the world against her because of that. On top of that she's a werewolf with a mate who looks and sounds like every white boy ever, who just happens to be an Alpha...not a lot of the system of this is explained or shown. Apparently the story got moved from Wattpad to a site where you have to

02:05:06

My Inner Life Part 10 (The End?)

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/31

In this two hour long finale, we bring you the end of this epic disaster that is known as My Inner Life, and nothing happens. I mean something happens, but really nothing happens and it just...ends. Like some many of these bad tics, there is no real conclusion. But really, it was the friends we made along the way that really count...and the shared trauma.

01:17:36

My Inner Life Episode 9 (Barren Seas and D*cks...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/24

We continue with Chapter 20, it was Chapter 20 right? Our brains have been turned to mush at this point with how long this chapter had been at the end of it. We see more of the gaudy Griffin city, which is in the North, and the Griffin High Council. We improvise a lot on this one, so bear with the giggling and the night direct story-telling we present; trust me our version is slightly more entertaining.

01:51:22

My Inner Life Part 8 (The Black Mountains, in the...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/17

Suddenly this becomes more of a Gothic novel as we take you into a completely made up place that's probably ripped from a better piece of literature than this. We spare ya'll from more of the cringe-worthy dialogue and tiger sex, trust me- it's nothing new >.> we're almost to the end of this guys!

01:22:48

My Inner Life Part 7 (Down once more)

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/10

We enter the water temple ‘cause apparently Dark Link is evil and Jenna can’t have him running around and boinking any hole in existence, she’s the only one that can have Link Jr I guess?

01:41:17

My Inner Life Part 6 (The one where if you play the...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/06

After Sunday's fiasco, we bring you the fixed and extended version! Hopefully this lives up to expectations. We experience the shortest war in fantasy history, the most annoying ceremonies (not as graphic as the bonding one thought *shiver*) and the most questionable childbirth scenario, this one makes Reicheru's pregnancy seem more logical!

00:29:16

Barbie Q. The Grill that fell in love with Christian...

Ficta Inferno ·

2020/05/05

Due to the disaster of our Sunday episode, we present you with this short reading of a small yet hilarious fic. The previous My Inner Life episode will be taken down and re-recorded, again sorry for the inconvenience but without further ado: Meet Barbie Q, a grill all the way from Vietnam that only wants to be taken home and enjoy her life as a grill, yet everything changes when a certain Mr Grey picks her up.

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