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PODCAST

"Fine" Dining

Michael Ornelas

Comedian Michael Ornelas dives deep into the stories behind your favorite chain restaurants like Domino"s, BJ"s Restaurant & Brewhouse, and Long John Silver"s before determining if they are better or worse than Chili"s: the most mediocre restaurant in America.

arts food

All Episodes

55:17

Hot Dog on a Stick (Part Two: Review) feat. Monis...

"Fine" Dining ·

2024/01/17

Getting in touch with our inner degenerates! Restaurant Fiction podcast host Monis Rose is here to wax romantic over the "character" of the original Hot Dog on a Stick kiosk by the Santa Monica Pier There's nowhere to sit, so the boys pick a dragon/pirate ship playground as their venue Public beachside seating has empty beer bottles and even a used Magnum love glove nearby... Military helicopters are circling us overhead and it makes us ask What's Going On Over There? Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius

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41:18

Hot Dog on a Stick (Part One: Eat Deets) feat. Monis...

"Fine" Dining ·

2024/01/10

Heinz-enberg runs these streets! Restaurant Fiction's Monis Rose joins Michael to pretend to learn the Eat Deets about Hot Dog on a Stick because he already knows everything Michael does a Keyser Söze walk to hide his limp from Monis [Audiodrama segment] Turf wars over who can sell Dodger dogs on which corners Alex Borstein berates Michael's preferences in hot dog condiment Hot Dog on a Stick is also known for its lemonade, which started as a Muscle Beach health drink with honey The history of the

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01:04:02

Buca di Beppo (Part Two: Review) feat. Mike Perkins

"Fine" Dining ·

2024/01/03

We're diving back into Joe's Hole! Comedian Mike Perkins is back once again to represent Italy in the case against the food at Buca di Beppo Michael & Mike are just a couple of Midfellas The breadiest love-making session ever is What's Going On Over There Buca di Beppo's decor is funny how? The portions at Buca are insane, as two men individually order a family style entree each The dessert is "diabetes in a glass" according to the boys' server Chip psychoanalyzes the characters on the Buca di

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38:13

Buca di Beppo (Part One: Eat Deets) feat. Mike Perkins

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/12/27

I took a real Italian to Buca di Beppo! We're joined by comedian Mike Perkins to dive into inauthentic Italian slophouse, Buca di Beppo Hear all about the Pope's room, the "vulgar" decor, and the fact that Buca's founder literally intended to "poke gentle fun" at Italians in this week's Eat Deets Learn the rather interesting translation of Buca di Beppo Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius XIV is anti-work You could have bought the entire franchise for a few million dollars... The Mother's Day debacle is

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58:32

Texas Roadhouse (Part Two: Review) feat. Michael Moore

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/12/20

The Roadhouse Devil feeds at dusk! We're back with friend and magician Michael Moore to talk about the atmosphere, service, and food at Texas Roadhouse Willie's Corner, the suspicious absence of floor peanuts, hoedowns, and taxidermy galore Some concerning verbiage from the service team has the Michaels speculating the presence of an otherworldly, Lovecraftian being skulking about the area in this week's What's Going On Over There? A three-part audiodrama addressing said monster Maxwell gives his

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43:51

Texas Roadhouse (Part One: Eat Deets) feat. Michael...

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/12/13

Stay tuned to the end: new outro song!! Michael is joined by friend and powerhouse of a man, Michael Moore (no relation to the filmmaker/documentarian of the same name) to dine at Texas Roadhouse The restaurant started as a spot in a mall in Indiana, so it was neither a roadhouse nor Texan, but that didn't stop owner W. Kent Taylor from building an empire after giving up on opening a Colorado-themed restaurant Learn all about the history of the chain dubbed the "Loudest Restaurant in America" in

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48:49

Katz's Delicatessen (Part Two: Review) feat. Joyce

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/12/06

NYC's legendary deli gets reviewed! We're in New York City! Michael's girlfriend Joyce joins him once again to talk about the hectic atmosphere, a hunky meat carver, and the matzo ball soup she's waited her entire life to try Katz's Delicatessen has so many lines and ordering stations that the chaos proves challenging to our duo Killer Mike walks by the table What's Going On Over There with the segration of those paying via card vs. those paying with cash? Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius XIV laments

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29:16

Katz's Delicatessen (Part One: Eat Deets) feat. Joyce

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/11/29

Katz's restaurant experience drops next Wednesday! Michael's girlfriend Joyce joins Michael in New York City, and they dive deep into the history of the world-famous deli that's over 100 years old in this episode of Eat Deets Katz's Delicatessen has been a staple of New York culture, amplified by its appearance in several movies and TV shows, most notably When Harry Met Sally Current owner Jake Dell has rules for how to conduct oneself at Katz's to avoid being thrown out Michael & Joyce address

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52:03

Gordon Biersch Brewery (Part Two: Review) feat....

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/11/22

The review for Gordon Biersch is here! All Elite Wrestling & Ring of Honor's "Pretty" Peter Avalon joins Michael to review the restaurant of the week The Gordon Biersch Brewery that Michael & Peter hit up closed its doors just 7 days after the boys dined there Peter eulogizes the Burbank Gordon Biersch Ever wondered what it'd be like living in a Buffalo Wild Wings? Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius the XIV takes offense to vulgarities Michael pitches a restaurant-themed wrestling gimmick to Peter

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26:32

Gordon Biersch Brewery (Part One: Eat Deets) feat....

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/11/15

Get Part 2 next Wednesday! All Elite Wrestling & Ring of Honor's "Pretty" Peter Avalon joins Michael in Burbank to learn all about the restaurant of the week Gordon Biersch Brewery stands behind the claim that they invented garlic fries Michael dives into the Eat Deets about Gordon Biersch Gordon Biersch cost Oskar Blues Brewing approx. $32,000 from a cease & desist Michael drops knowledge about Shakey's Pizza Parlor's prominence in the Philippines An embarrassing story from 25+ years ago about

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01:22:23

The Melting Pot feat. Rhyan Schwartz

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/11/08

"Fine" Dining is back to weekly releases! The Melting Pot is in the midst of a renaissance, with ambitious expansion goals Michael details the changes moving into the new season Learn about the history of the franchise in Eat Deets (fka Resty Fact Round-Up) Guest host Rhyan Schwartz gives Michael someone to eat all the cheese that our host refuses to touch Michael rebrands cheese to ch**se Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius the XIV shares his wealth of knowledge to give The Melting Pot advice on their

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01:00

Season 2 Trailer

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/11/01

The search for mediocrity continues! Join host Michael Ornelas as he gets in the trenches for more chain restaurants than his arteries can handle. Each episode, he'll be joined by a different guest host, and no eatery is off-limits. Season 2 will include fast casual and even fast food spots as the caloric floodgates have been opened. Kicking off November 8th with guest host Rhyan Schwartz, Michael pays a visit to The Melting Pot for some fondue. This season, you can also look forward to

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01:14:32

TGI Fridays the 13th: Season Finale

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/10/25

Season 2 starts November 8th! TGI Fridays is dark, red, and honestly feels like a murder room. Appropriate for the season Michael is joined by friend Sandy Rose to deliver the Resty Fact Round-Up while Garrett goes to town on Michael's bidet. Learn how TGI Fridays original incarnation was drastically different from what we know it as today Michael's pineapple son Juicy Jr. dons the mask as Juice-Son Vorhees in a terrifying murder spree homage to the Friday the 13th horror film franchise JUB issues

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58:11

Marie Callender's Restaurant & Bakery: DILF Depot

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/10/11

Do grocery store pies taste better in their restaurant of origin? Not by much! Marie Callender's Restaurant & Bakery feels like a slice of Michael & Garrett's childhoods, a wood-paneled wonderland that feels like a dentist's office waiting room Garrett details the history of the franchise in this week's Resty Fact Round-Up, including a history of "Pie Spies" Marie Callender's proves to be a haven of "old" The winner of the Septemburger Bracket $500 Giveaway is announced! Michael falls asleep in the

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01:14:42

Johnny Rockets & the Heavy Chair Heist

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/09/27

The last quarterfinal match of Septemburger has arrived! Johnny Rockets is a genuine-hearted homage to the diners of the 1950s, which Michael would have been all about if this wasn't a "Sports Lounge" location Garrett details the history of the franchise in this week's Resty Fact Round-Up Septemburger match 4: Umami Burger vs. Johnny Rockets The You-Must Bowl has both Michael & Garrett crying, but insisting they're fine A CHAIR HEIST!! What's Going On with the restaurant's photographer snubbing our

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01:11:14

Umami Burger's Rise & Fall & Slight Re-Rise...

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/09/20

Septemburger's #1 seed, Umami Burger is up to bat! Michael has an axe to grind after the best burger in Los Angeles changed up their recipe a few years back Garrett outlines the rise and fall of Umami Burger in Resty Fact Round-Up, and why they have a shot at regaining respect once again Septemburger will pit Umami against Johnny Rockets next week What's Going On with Umami feeling like it's still going through the pandemic? The service staff definitely noticed they were being reviewed and changed

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01:32:40

Red Robin feat. John Angeli (Terror Firma)

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/09/13

Septemburger rolls along with the #5 seed, Red Robin! Michael & Garrett are not just joined by indie horror film producer John Angeli, but they're outright sponsored by his new movie Terror Firma Garrett outlines the surnameless "Sam" who founded Red Robin by annoying the heck out of anyone who would listen with his one Red Robin song More of a deep dive on the history of the franchise in Resty Fact Round-Up Septemburger match #3: Red Robin vs. Outback Steakhouse Forget the burgers, Red Robin's got

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46:27

Septemburger Has Arrived!! (Fuddruckers vs....

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/09/06

It's the burger battle of the year as Septemburger is now upon us! The tournament kicks off as the 8 entrants are announced and seeded Maybe the most badass theme song ever Garrett details the history of the hamburger in Burger Fact Round-Up #3 seed Fuddruckers faces off against the #6 seed Applebees #2 seed Islands faces off against the #7 seed Bob's Big Boy First round scoring for #4 seed Outback Steakhouse ahead of its match-up next week against the #5 seed Red Robin JUB will help you generalize

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01:16

Septemburger Kicks Off! (Trailer)

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/09/04

It's the best month of the year: It's SEPTEMBURGER! The first annual Septemburger tournament kicks off with the following match-ups: Bob's Big Boy (7) vs. Island's Fine Burgers & Drinks (2) Fuddrucker's (3) vs. Applebee's (6) Plus, the boys review Outback Steakhouse (4)'s first round burger ahead of its match-up next week against Red Robin (5). Yummmmm! Download the full episode this Wednesday wherever you get your podcasts! Music by: James McEnelly (@Ramshackle_Music) We're on Patreon! Get an

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01:17:28

Twin Peaks: The Revenge Breastaurant feat. Emma Danger

"Fine" Dining ·

2023/08/23

Michael & Garrett get back at Michael's niece-aged cousin Emma Danger for sending them to Hooters last time she was on the podcast! Twin Peaks is a breastaurant founded on the premise that Hooters had become "too tame," and lived up to that idea in its early years amidst scandals and indecent exposure charges Garrett fulfills his You-Must Bowl duties by donning Insane Clown Posse facepaint and consuming this meal while embodying the Juggalo lifestyle Even a little Judge Judy is more Judge Judy than

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157 results

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