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PODCAST

Divorce University Online

Tammy R. Ferreira

Tammy (Child Custody Coach) shares her experience and insights gained from her own divorce and subsequent step family. She also worked alongside her late husband, Attorney Thomas D. Ferreira, for over 15 years as a paralegal and mediator before beginning her child custody coaching practice in 2019. Thomas passed away on May 1, 2023 and Tammy continues to share the wisdom she gained from Thomas through the years as well as her own perspective. Tammy specializes in helping parents who are dealing with

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

38:00

Standing Your Ground in Child Custody Cases

Divorce University Online ·

2022/11/02

Standing Your Ground in Child Custody Cases – Episode 215 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Often in child custody cases, we see one parent who is sick and tired of the other parent’s crap! Can you relate? But being overly inflexible can also increase conflict and cause you to look uncooperative to the Court. So, the secret is to strike a balance between being kind and cooperative while also being able to draw clear healthy boundaries. So, what does that look like in a practical sense

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31:56

Start Creating

Divorce University Online ·

2022/10/25

Start Creating – Episode 214 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Last week, we focused on how to stop negative thoughts. However, once you’ve accomplished stopping the negative thoughts, how do you move forward into creating the life you want? How do you make a permanent shift in your mindset that allows you to build a post-divorce life that you love? What strategies will increase your changes for happiness and success? For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com

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34:58

Stop Imagining

Divorce University Online ·

2022/10/18

Stop Imagining – Episode 213 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Are you constantly worried about “what if”? What if I lose custody? What if the Court gets it wrong? What if I don’t have enough money to cover my bills? Many divorcing people are plagued by “what if” simply because divorce is such an unknown for most people. And the unknown creates uncertainty and fear. In this episode, we talk about these fears and how you can stop them. For more information, please visit us at

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32:08

Everybody Hates Me

Divorce University Online ·

2022/10/11

Everybody Hates Me – Episode 212 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Many times people are in a terrible state of mind in the beginning of their divorce or child custody case. That can lead to some equally terrible behavior. If you make this mistake, it can start to feel like everybody hates you, from your ex, to your kids, to the Judge. But do they really or are you just caught in a case with a bad reputation? And either way, how do you turn it around? For more information, please visit us at

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38:45

Every Problem Has a Solution

Divorce University Online ·

2022/10/04

Every Problem Has a Solution – Episode 211 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In divorce or child custody issues, much of the discussion centers on who is to blame for various problems. To solve problems, we need solutions, not blame. In this episode we talk about how to reframe your thinking into focusing on the problem. By doing this, you can find a solution to most any problem you face. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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32:48

Marital Hatred

Divorce University Online ·

2022/09/27

Marital Hatred – Episode 210 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, we discuss the concept of “Marital Hatred”, a term coined by a therapist named Terrence Real. According to Real, there is a certain amount of hatred for your spouse that is normal in a marriage. But as many of us have experienced, that hatred can hit a tipping point that ultimately leads to divorce. Then you’re dealing with divorce hatred, which becomes the ultimate slippery slope. For more information, please

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38:17

The Divorce Storm

Divorce University Online ·

2022/09/20

The Divorce Storm – Episode 209 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. We weather many “storms” in our life. Sometimes they are physical storms such as natural disasters and sometimes they are emotional storms. In this episode, we draw some parallels between the two and discuss the critical need to make the right decision at various stages. Decisions that, in a natural disaster, can mean life or death and that, in an emotional disaster, can feel like life or death. For more information, please

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39:19

Men vs. Women

Divorce University Online ·

2022/09/13

Men vs. Women – Episode 208 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. As men and women, we come at life from very different perspectives. As we work with divorcing couples, we see recurring parents of conflict that comes during the relationship, at the point of breakup, and especially after the split. And yet, the Court expects us to set aside our feelings and “act like adults”, which means get along. In this episode, we help you view both perspectives, which may help you have a better understanding

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32:17

The Humbling Experience of Raising Children

Divorce University Online ·

2022/09/06

The Humbling Experience of Raising Children – Episode 207 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When we’re new to parenting we have a vision of the future with our children. But what happens when your vision meets your reality, and they look nothing alike. No one signs up to be a parent half the time. When you are dealing with child custody issues, reality can become further and further from your vision for your children. You aren’t alone. For more information, please visit us at

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29:55

Nothing Succeeds Like Success

Divorce University Online ·

2022/08/30

Nothing Succeeds Like Success – Episode 206 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. A big part of success is momentum. But how do you gain momentum when it feels like life is only handing you lemons? Of course, you make lemonade. Join us as we discuss “making lemonade” even in the midst of trials like divorce. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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37:43

Who Can Do It? Anyone

Divorce University Online ·

2022/08/24

Who Can Do It? Anyone – Episode 205 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When you see other people succeeding, whether in family life, career, or a hobby, it’s easy to think about how lucky that person must be. What we don’t see is all the time, effort and energy that went into their accomplishment for days, months, or even years. The good news is, if you have a dream, you can accomplish even if you’re in the midst of divorce or child custody chaos. For more information, please visit us at

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35:31

My Child Hates Me

Divorce University Online ·

2022/08/16

My Child Hates Me – Episode 204 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When you’re struggling to maintain a relationship with your child in a co-parenting situation, it’s easy to start claiming parental alienation. But, family systems are much more complex than simply blaming one parent. If you’re alienated or being accused of alienation, this episode will give you insight into the possible reasons why and what you can do to fix it. For more information, please visit us at

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33:06

Happiness Makes You a Better Parent

Divorce University Online ·

2022/08/09

Happiness Makes You a Better Parent – Episode 203 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Happy parents are better parents. Happy parents produce happy children. You owe it to yourself and your children to intentionally cultivate happiness regardless of your present circumstances. So, how can you be happy despite the inherent negativity of divorce and child custody issues? For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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29:58

Your Hidden Power

Divorce University Online ·

2022/08/02

Your Hidden Power – Episode 202 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Your hidden power is something available to everyone and it can be a huge help, not only during divorce but in any life crisis you are experiencing. Listen now as we explore your hidden power and give examples of how you can use it to your advantage. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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32:35

Why Your Children MUST Be in Therapy

Divorce University Online ·

2022/07/26

Why Your Children MUST Be in Therapy – Episode 201 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Therapy is something we always suggest to divorcing parents for their children. Today, we discuss therapy in the context of the emotional strain on children of transitions and the emotional damage that’s done when one parenting isn’t meeting the needs of the child. And, why the Court is often ill-equipped to recognize these nuances. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com

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35:33

Best Interest of the Child

Divorce University Online ·

2022/07/19

Best Interest of the Child - Episode 200 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Best interest of the child is one of the most misunderstood concepts in family law. The law varies state to state and Thomas, of course, is only licensed in California. But this concept has many commonalities and in this episode, we’ll help you understand what Best Interest of the Child is and what it isn’t. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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37:21

Listener Questions Answered

Divorce University Online ·

2022/07/12

Listener Questions Answered – Episode 199 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, we answer several listener questions. The topics include appearing in Court, financial considerations when determining custody and grandparent rights. We also give a shout out to one special listener. For more information, please visit us at www.divorceuniversityonline.com. Thanks for listening!

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33:11

But…….I’m Right!

Divorce University Online ·

2022/07/05

But…….I’m Right! – Episode 198 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. When you know you’re right and the other parent is wrong, it can be very hard to disengage from a disagreement. This is true in any relationship whether a marriage or not but it becomes even more of a problem during divorce. Being right can be important, especially if the safety of your children is at risk. But many times, we’re giving our energy to an argument that ultimately doesn’t really matter. So, how do you determine

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30:42

Seashells By The Seashore

Divorce University Online ·

2022/06/28

Seashells By The Seashore – Episode 197 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. In this episode, we share a heartwarming story about a father that regularly took his children to hunt for seashells on the beach. For his daughter, these became very fond memories and she even kept her collection of seashells as an adult. But her father had a secret about the adventures that the daughter never learned until her father became elderly. How can this secret help you in your custody and coparenting

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30:56

Are You Chasing Sunk Costs?

Divorce University Online ·

2022/06/21

Are You Chasing Sunk Costs? – Episode 196 of the Divorce University Online Podcast. Sunk cost is an economic term used to describe costs that in the past and should not be considered in the current financial analysis of a project to help determine whether the project is worth pursuing financially. This theory can be applied to divorce to help you determine whether you should continue fighting or consider letting go. In divorce this issue reaches far beyond financial aspect because divorce also takes

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