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PODCAST

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations

Melissa Bottorff-Arey

Suicide loss changes everything. The Leftover Pieces® Podcast explores life after suicide through honest conversations with survivors, experts, and grieving parents learning to live forward after unimaginable loss. Parents, partners, siblings, and friends share what it means to keep living when the world has been forever changed.Hosted by Melissa Bottorff-Arey, whose 21-year-old son Alex died by suicide in 2016, the show blends intimate conversations with survivors, healers, and mental health

health & fitness mental health

All Episodes

2:27

Grief Truth #5; August Daily Nuggets

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/08/05

“Guilt and love often feel the same.” August 5 Daily Nugget Take a breath. Let yourself arrive. Sometimes we don’t need answers — just something true to hold. Here’s today’s grief truth. Guilt and love often feel the same. Guilt is one of grief’s heaviest companions. It creeps in through the cracks of “what if” and “why didn’t I.” But here’s something I’ve come to learn: guilt often masquerades as love. It’s not always about wrongdoing — it’s about a love so deep, so fierce, th...

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2:27

Grief Truth #4; August Daily Nuggets

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/08/04

Today's Grief Truth - “Some days are lighter. Some days are heavy — and that’s okay.” Welcome, fellow griever. This is your Daily Nugget from me, Melissa, your host of The Leftover Pieces. Today we will share a moment of presence, a breath of truth, and a reminder. Take a breath. Let yourself arrive. Sometimes we don’t need answers — just something true to hold. Here’s today’s grief truth. Yes, some days are lighter. Some days are heavy — and that’s okay. There are days when your ...

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2:04

Grief Truth #3; August Daily Nuggets

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/08/03

Today's Grief Truth -" Grief is Not Linear". There’s no finish line here. No checklist. Grief is wild and unpredictable. You might feel “okay” one day — and the next, the wind knocks you flat. But that doesn’t mean you’re back at the beginning. It means you're walking through it honestly. Progress in grief doesn’t move forward like an arrow — it spirals. It folds back on itself. It teaches you again and again what it means to hold love and pain in the same palm. If today feels hard...

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2:04

Grief Truth #2; August Daily Nuggets

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/08/02

Here’s today’s grief truth. “It’s okay to laugh and cry in the same hour.” Grief is full of contradictions — and also full of truth. One moment, you’re sobbing in the car because their favorite song came on. The next, you're belly-laughing at the memory of something wild they once did. That swing? That unpredictability? It doesn’t mean you’re unstable — it means you’re human. We are wired to hold both heartbreak and humor, joy and sorrow, love and longing. You are allowed to...

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5:34

Grief Truth #1; August Daily Nuggets INTRO

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/08/01

Hello Fellow Griever— and Welcome Back. If you’ve been wondering where I’ve been… you’re not wrong. July was quieter than usual here on the podcast (totally quiet!) — but it wasn’t in vain. Behind the scenes, I’ve been pouring myself into some powerful new offerings: two brand-new grief coaching programs — each with their own beautiful workbook now published and available — and the long-awaited launch of The Lighthouse Community.--- >LINK HERE The Lighthouse is a sacred space just for grie...

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13:57

Getting Real About Grief ‘Coaching’; Why I Do This &...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/06/15

Welcome today fellow griever. I appreciate you, I see you and thank you so much for listening and if you can, please ---Support the show Today, I’m taking you behind the scenes — not just of the podcast, but of why I do all of this. Spoiler alert: it’s not about making six figures. Not even close to what it's about! It started with a mic, a grieving heart, and the hope that I could create the kind of podcast I couldn’t find after losing my son Alex to suicide. And in many ways, most ways tha...

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11:53

New Ways to Heal Together; What’s New at The Leftover...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/06/01

Welcome today fellow griever. I appreciate you, I see you and thank you so much for listening and if you can, please ---Support the show You may have seen soft mentions of some new things I’ve been building — maybe in your inbox or on social — and today I’m diving all the way in. If this is the first you’re hearing of it, then welcome — you’re right on time. In this heart-led episode of Down the Rabbit Hole, I’m walking you through what’s new — and what’s next — here at The Leftover Pieces™. ...

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5:25

Welcome to May 31; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/31

"Hello --It is May 31st and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 5: The FINALE for may 2025 Daily Nuggets Day 31: Today’s truth is: "You're still here. That matters." Idea: Completion, continuation, and gratitude. Day 31. We made it. This is something! THANK YOU You've shown up—for 31 days—inside your grief, your he...

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4:10

Welcome to May 30; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/30

"Hello --It is May 30th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 5: The 3 Day Wrap -up for the Month Day 30: Today’s truth is: "Life, what is it but a dream?" Idea: The surreal nature of life after loss. Grief makes reality feel hazy — like you're walking through someone else's life. Or maybe the world i...

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3:56

Welcome to May 29; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/29

"Hello --It is May 29th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 5: The 3 Day Wrap -up for the Month Day 29: Today’s truth is: (Finale echo) "I can't go back to yesterday..." Idea: Reinforcing transformation. We began this month with this truth and return to it now — because some truths don’t get easier, only more f...

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4:05

Welcome to May 28; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/28

"Hello --It is May 28th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 28: Today’s truth is: "Why did you come out here at all?" Idea: The isolation of grief. There are days when grief makes you question your place in the world. You might feel like a shadow of yourself. Or l...

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4:29

Welcome to May 27; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/27

"Hello --It is May 27th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 27: Today’s truth is: "It sounds uncommon nonsense." Idea: Navigating unhelpful advice. Grief comes with opinions — often terrible ones. "Everything happens for a reason." "They wouldn't want you to be sad." "...

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88:02

Blackbird; A Mother's Reflection on Grief, Loss &...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/26

Welcome today fellow griever. I appreciate you, I see you and thank you so much for listening and if you can, please ---Support the show Today, I release a recent conversation with Betsy Thibaut Stephenson to talk about her son Charlie who was a smart, witty, reserved, and was (silently) living with being 'unmotivated' & being depressed. Despite doing what seemed like all of the right things, Charlie, a rising senior in college, died by suicide in July of 2022 at only 21 years old. It was...

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3:53

Welcome to May 26; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/26

"Hello --It is May 26th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 26: Today's truth is: "I shall be punished... by being drowned in my own tears." Idea: Emotional overwhelm. Have you ever felt like grief might consume you? If you let it in, would it pull you under for good? You're ...

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4:12

Welcome to May 25; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/25

"Hello --It is May 25th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 25: Today’s truth is: "Why is a raven like a writing desk?" Idea: Unanswerable questions. This is one of those questions that has no answer. It's a shared experience, much like the ones we ask in grief: Why my ...

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4:01

Welcome to May 24; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/24

"Hello --It is May 24th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 24: Today’s truth is: "Then you shouldn't talk." Idea: The silence around grief. Sometimes, we silence ourselves — afraid to be too heavy, sad, or too much. It's not easy to express these emotions; we all strug...

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4:00

Welcome to May 23; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/23

"Hello --It is May 23rd and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 3: Control & Surrender Day 23: Today’s truth is: "Try again: draw a long breath..." Idea: Starting over. Some days, you start over five times before noon. And that’s okay. Grief doesn’t care about linear progress — it just asks that you...

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4:03

Welcome to May 22; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/22

"Hello --It is May 22nd and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 4: Resilience & Reclamation Day 22: Today’s truth is: "It's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards." Idea: Creating forward-looking memories. Grief keeps us anchored in the past—the moments before, the final day, the last words. That's not...

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4:22

Welcome to May 21; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/21

"Hello --It is May 21st and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 3: Control & Surrender Day 21: Today’s truth (revisited) is: "I can't go back to yesterday..." Idea: Accepting life as it is now. Let's revisit this truth: You can't go back. And it's cruel — because back there is where your loved one s...

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4:07

Welcome to May 20; "We're All Mad Here" DAILY Mental...

The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations ·

2025/05/20

"Hello --It is May 20th and welcome to Wonderland Fellow Griever. — “You’ve just stepped Down the Rabbit Hole — where mental health meets madness after loss. This is your daily dose of truth, grief, and yes, just the right bit of madness.” WEEK 3: Control & Surrender Day 20: Today’s truth is: "Begin at the beginning... and go on till you come to the end." Idea: Getting unstuck. Grief can make even the most straightforward steps feel like climbing a mountain. It's okay to feel ...

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