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PODCAST

The Greatest Movie Ever Made

The Greatest Movie Ever Made

With countless films produced during the course of over a century of film history, determining the greatest movie ever made seems like an impossible exercise. Thankfully, Justus Burkitt and David Scandura — God"s favorite idiots — have taken on this Sisyphean task. Join these two film fanatics each week as they meticulously and rigorously review a wide range of movies, painstakingly searching all corners and niches of film history to once and for all find the Greatest Movie Ever Made.

tv & film film reviews

All Episodes

02:27:28

Episode 24: Blue Valentine

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/02/16

David’s mandated Valentine’s Month takes a depressing turn this week as our hosts explore the loveless marriage at the heart of Blue Valentine. Certified Wife Guy Justus meets his match with Ryan Gosling’s deadbeat balding husband Dean. David fantasizes about torturing Bobby Ontario. Is the dog that dies at the beginning of this movie more worthy of mourning than the slowly decaying marriage of Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams? Check into this sketchy sex motel and find out on this episode of The

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01:56:07

Episode 23: My Bloody Valentine (1981)

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/02/09

David’s February podcast takeover continues with this holiday slasher straight from the Great White North! Welcome to Valentine Bluffs, a cozy Canadian town known for its love of Valentine’s Day and mining-themed slasher villains. When you’re done getting hot and heavy with your Valentine down in the bowels of the Hanniger Mine, head over to the Cage to hear the spooky bartender recount the legend of the Valentine’s Day curse. Say hello to Mabel at the laundromat, join Hollis in the local junkyard

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02:00:02

Episode 22: Crash (1996)

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/02/02

David takes control of the podcast for the entire month of February with a slate of romantic and Valentine’s Day-themed programming! In this episode, he yanks the steering wheel and turns onto the highway to horny town with David Cronenberg’s dark tale of car crashes and sex. Should Crash be the next big Hollywood cinematic universe? Why do women in this movie only take one boob out? And, most importantly, is any of this freaky car crash sex hot? Tune into The Greatest Movie Ever Made to find

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02:30:39

Episode 21: Snowpiercer

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/01/26

This week, David and Justus board the rattling ark for a steampunk train ride to discuss Bong Joon-Ho’s Snowpiercer. Justus loses his mind about how freezing a dude’s arm and smashing it with a hammer is a pretty awesome torture method. David, on the other hand, unveils his Advanced Willy Wonka Theory and how this film applies to it. And together, the boys both agree that the protein bars made of bugs kinda look delicious. Grab a hand axe and fight back against the ruling class on this

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02:01:17

Episode 20: Tootsie

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/01/19

This week’s episode finds our hosts once again out of their element as they discuss the feminist and LGBT readings of this comedy classic. Hear David go wild for a young Geena Davis, Justus vehemently stan Teri Garr and both of them relentlessly talk shit about Dustin Hoffman’s Michael Dorsey. Plus, tune in for a brief story about Justus’ stint as an extra in an episode of Westworld. That sounds fun! Whip out the lipstick and get ready for another installment of The Greatest Movie Ever Made! Tootsie

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01:50:29

Episode 19: Who Killed Captain Alex?

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/01/12

This week, David guides Justus through the wild and wonderful world of Wakaliwood, a Ugandan film studio based in the slums of the country’s capital, Kampala. They’re discussing the studio’s breakout international hit, Who Killed Captain Alex?. Filmed for a shockingly low budget of less than $200, this wholly unique action comedy has amassed an internet following and brought the Wakaliwood team onto the world stage. What the heck is a “video joker?” Is this the best usage of Seal’s “Kiss from a

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01:56:53

Episode 18: Best of 2023

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2024/01/05

David and Justus aren’t interested in doing any actual work to start the New Year, so this week, they kick back, crack open a couple of cold ones and talk about the highs and lows of the 2023 film season. Join them as they reflect on a wild year of box office bombs, Hollywood strikes and that beautiful time when the movies were simultaneously ruled by a nuclear physicist and a plastic girl doll. We’re counting down the top 5 best movies of 2023 on the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Music: “Fractals” by

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01:58:58

Episode 17: Sunset Boulevard

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/12/29

The American Film Institute rated Sunset Boulevard #16 on the 2007 edition of their 100 Years…100 Movies list. This week, the legacy of this acclaimed film is sullied and tarnished by appearing on the TGMEM podcast! Tune in to hear Justus and David peel back the layers of the film noir classic to get to the bottom of this seedy tale of Hollywood’s darkside. Together, they uncover mysteries like the Black Dahlia Murderer’s foray into killing monkeys, Cecil B. DeMille’s boundless bloodlust for horses

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01:59:33

Episode 16: The Muppet Christmas Carol

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/12/23

Gather the family around the fire for a cozy holiday installment of the show as your resident Muppet hosts discuss a Christmas classic from their childhoods. What is Christmas like on Arrakis? Are Statler and Waldorf in league with the Cenobites? Is the Ghost of Christmas Present ripping farts under his huge coat? How did a frog knock up a pig? Is the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come’s face actually a giant spectral butthole? Join us for these and other holiday hijinks on this festive and fun episode

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03:04:56

Episode 15: Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me with...

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/12/16

David and Justus welcome Valerie Moffat to discuss Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, and together, craft a podcast episode as inaccessible, impenetrable and complex as the world of Twin Peaks itself. Only the most seasoned Lynch-heads should dare to venture forth, as our trio gets deep into discussions about all the intrigue, garmonbozia and incomprehensible bullshit packed into this theatrical chapter of David Lynch’s nightmarish magnum opus. Brew yourself a damn fine cup of coffee and get

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01:41:06

Episode 14: Santa's Slay

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/12/08

David and Justus ring in the holiday season with the show’s first listener request as they tackle the direct-to-video holiday slasher Santa’s Slay! In this film, legendary wrestler Bill Goldberg dons the red coat of a Satanic Santa Claus who descends upon a small township to spread some holiday fear. Stay tuned for deadly suplexes, sharpened candy canes and bad puns as we kick off the holiday season on the Greatest Movie Ever Made! Santa’s Slay (2005) is directed by David Steiman and stars Bill

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02:13:35

Episode 13: Heathers

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/12/01

This week on the show, Justus, David and Winona Ryder ascend the dog-eat-dog social hierarchy of Westerburg High School to try to join the Heathers. They soon find out that three preppy rich girls are the least of their worries as they must face off against teachers who exploit teenage suffering, violent airheaded jocks, stoner cops, a pathetic weasel kid with lots of opinions about society and his building-demolishing, mustache-twirling a father that may or may not be Batman’s greatest nemesis

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02:44:14

Episode 12: Boogie Nights

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/11/16

On this week's show, David and Justus sink 13 inches deep into the glitz and glamor of the golden age of porn with Paul Thomas Anderson’s Boogie Nights. Stay tuned for penetrating conversations about America’s favorite himbo/actor/rapper/devout Catholic/violent racist, cinema’s premier cuckold, the show’s wildest Surprise Alfred Molina yet, a heartbreaking performance from Philip Seymour Hoffman and a shockingly large prosthetic Johnson. Crank the 70s funk, slip on your roller skates, unzip

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02:17:46

Episode 11: Rango

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/11/09

This week, David and Justus tackle their first family animated film and also try (and fail miserably) at their first family-friendly episode. It’s Rango, the only film in history to ask, “What if Johnny Depp was a lizard cowboy?” Our boys follow Rango to the lowly frontier town of Dirt and meet a colorful cast of anthropomorphic cowpokes and outlaws alike, including a bizarrely cockney Gila monster, a colony of bat-riding inbred mole rats, a spooky spider tailor/undertaker and a sexy gunslinging

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02:34:41

Episode 10: Ip Man

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/11/03

David and Justus take a trip to Hong Kong on a quest to study the ancient art of kung fu movies, starting their journey with Wilson Yip’s Ip Man. Along the way, they will face many trials and foes, including Jeffrey Dahmer’s taste in horror movies, the merciless vengeance of Lorraine Bobbitt, David’s unavoidable impulse to quote Kung Pow! Enter the Fist, Donnie Yen’s insane punch combos, a Japanese colonel who just can’t help but shoot every character that minorly inconveniences him and — most

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02:24:09

Episode 9: Trick 'r Treat

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/10/26

Gather round, ghouls, ghosts and dipshits for the most terrifying Horrorthon tale yet! Carve a jack-o-lantern and put those finishing touches on your costume as you listen to David and Justus discuss this cult classic horror anthology. Join a school principal with devious afterschool activities, frisky college co-eds with dark secrets, a group of kids up to Halloween mischief, a grumpy old man running from his past and an adorable trick-or-treater in a burlap sack who’s there to make sure they all

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02:55:30

Episode 8: Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight Part 2...

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/10/22

This week, we find our heroes knelt before the throne of the Sultan of Schlock, Tony Moschetti, begging for enlightenment. Unto them, he has bestowed a mysterious gift — a Polish horror comedy with an infamously negative critical reception. Is Poland the world’s largest Call of Duty multiplayer map? Do the Polish know how to make a hot dog? Will the Podmaster’s recording software survive this foolhardy undertaking? And does anyone on earth think this is the Greatest Movie Ever Made? Nobody Sleeps

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00:17:28

Horrorthon Bonus: Justus Reads a Scary Story

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/10/20

Episode 8 is delayed a by few days, so in the meantime please enjoy Justus narrating his short horror story "Shitter". Music: Fractals by Karl Casey and White Bat Audio

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02:27:02

Episode 7: Friday the 13th

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/10/13

Howdy campers! This week, our Halloween Horrorthon continues with a trip to summer camp to talk about the archetypical 80s slasher film. Leave your hockey masks at home, folks, but be sure to pack your slutty jorts, Native American headdresses and itchy old lady sweaters. Campers are sure to enjoy activities such as strip board game night, third-act coffee boiling and Mrs. Voorhees’ strength training class. Join Kevin Bacon, Crazy Ralph and your camp counselors, David and Justus, for slasher movie

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01:57:37

Episode 6: Prince of Darkness

The Greatest Movie Ever Made ·

2023/10/06

Justus and David kick off a month of Halloween horror programming with John Carpenter’s underrated middle chapter in his so-called “Apocalypse Trilogy.” Pour yourself a tall glass of Satanic Baja Blast and settle in because Justus is going to gush about this movie like he’s a physics student who’s just been stabbed with a broken bicycle by Alice Cooper. As for David? Well, let’s just say that neither the Holy Ghost nor the God plutonium will save him from Justus’ ire. These demonic hijinks and more

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