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PODCAST

Coming Out Pod

Coming Out Pod is a weekly podcast hosted by Lauren Flans where queer folks from all walks of life tell the tales of how they came out to friends, family, and the world at large! Because who doesn"t love a coming out story?

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

96:59

Episode 186: Silencing Our Teachers

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/02/16

As you're no doubt aware, there is some *truly* awful legislation making headlines lately. These bills and laws not only severely impede teachers' ability to, well, teach, but also make educators vulnerable to lawsuits for simply talking about race and gender issues in the classroom. It's real Handmaid's Tale stuff. To better examine how dire the situation is, we brought on two *tremendous* queer teachers, B (they/she) and Andie (they/them), who hail from Pennsylvania and Ohio respectively. They

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67:19

Episode 185: Mariko Tamaki

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/02/09

We've got award-winning author Mariko Tamaki (DC's "Crush & Lobo"), whose queer YA novel "Cold" just came out this week! Mariko came of age at an all-girls private school in Toronto, and thought her disinterest in boys was just because she was a late bloomer...until she got to university, and discovered Montreal's '90s queer scene. Mariko's story includes being schooled by lesbian elders about the complicated dynamics within the queer community, a moment of desperation when she ABSOLUTELY NEEDED a

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74:43

Episode 184: Jenn McCalley

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/02/02

In a real lovefest of an episode, we're joined by Nicole's former youth group advisor, Jenn McCalley, who Nicole came out to twenty years ago as a wee baby queer! But that's not all: in true "circle of life" fashion, Jenn is now recently out as a baby queer HERSELF!!! Now a social worker and married mother of two, Jenn realized early in the pandemic that not living her full truth was affecting both her marriage and her mental health. Jenn talks about what it was like to come out as bi at

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76:12

Episode 183: Mike Mizwicki

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/01/26

We sit down with Nicole's dear friend and concert-going buddy, Mike Mizwicki! Mike grew up in an Irish Catholic family in Chicago, so suffice to say he was surrounded by an ever-present machismo factor. But even as a child, he could tell from other people's reactions to his behaviors and interests that there was something about him that was "wrong or different." Mike pays homage to Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss (the guiding gay light of his youth), and we talk for the first time about the

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67:17

Episode 182: Regan Aliyah

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/01/19

In a mere twenty-two years on this planet, Regan Aliyah (Club Mickey Mouse) has already forged a career as an actor, rapper, spoken word artist, choreographer, and more! Regan started working professionally at the age of twelve; as a result, she never really focused on herself or her personal life because she felt she had to prioritize her outward-facing persona. She teaches us all about The Lesbian Masterdoc (TM), reveals her cartoon crushes, and tells the *adorable* story of how she met her MMA

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77:21

Episode 181: Germana Belo

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/01/12

We're joined by Germana Belo, co-writer of the award-winning, *very* sexy and sapphic web series RED, as well as a brand new series that she and Nicole wrote TOGETHER! Growing up in Brazil in the 1980s, Germana feared that the feelings she had for women (especially Brooke Shields...) were a sin, or even a curse. She talks about falling in love with her first therapist at the age of eighteen (classic!), and shares how to this day she often feels like she is "too gay to be bi, and not gay enough to be

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62:50

Episode 180: Nikki Garza

Coming Out Pod ·

2022/01/05

We're starting the year off right with actor/content creator/all-around-joyful-and-hilarious-human-being, Nikki Garza! Nikki explains how she's distanced herself from the term "body positivity" as she's watched it come to mean insecurity in general, as opposed to the actual marginalization of othered bodies. Nikki prefers the term "body confidence," and discusses how so many people are attracted to fat folks...but want to "love you in private" (yes; even ultra-accepting queer people). We also

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65:38

Episode 179: Listener Mailbag 2021!

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/12/22

You know it, you love it, you can't live without it - it's our third annual LISTENER MAILBAG EPISODE! We had some *great* questions this year, including how to recognize the subtle differences between aesthetic attraction, sexual attraction, and being attracted "to the person," and an epic four-part question about polyamory. Plus, we tackle that tale as old as time itself: why does EVERY queer woman on dating apps want to go on a fu@#ing hike?!? 'Tis the season to hunker down under some blankets and

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70:44

Episode 178: Stelle

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/12/15

We hear a raw, inspiring story of survival and resilience from our guest, Stelle. One of eight children, Stelle grew up in an extremely isolated religious cult started by her father in rural Oregon. Among other things, cult life entailed corporal punishment, and teachings that women must submit to their husbands unconditionally. Stelle shares how she managed to free herself, and recalls the point at which she was able to start considering her sexuality. It's a story that is truly unlike any we've

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87:13

Episode 177: Raising A Trans Kid

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/12/08

We have a beautiful conversation with Lauren's buddy, “Jay,” who tells us the story of his daughter’s coming out, and shares his own experience as a “cis hetero male dad” raising a trans child. At three years old, Jay’s AMAB (Assigned Male At Birth) daughter began giving “insistent, persistent, and consistent” signals that she felt she was a girl. Jay discusses what he and his wife observed in their daughter’s development, and speaks candidly about the challenges parents of trans kids face,

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78:06

Episode 176: Queer Sex Educator Gabrielle Kassel

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/12/01

Sexting, libido, and dildos, OH MY! These are just a few of the things we go deep into (you're welcome) with queer sex educator Gabrielle Kassel! It's a *very* uncensored ep of the pod as Gabrielle shares the questions she is most frequently asked in her particular line of work. Gabrielle, who defines sex as "any meaningful act of pleasure," blows our minds by laying out the difference between spontaneous desire and responsive desire, and discusses how to cultivate an environment where it's easier

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80:04

Episode 175: Poly Thanksgiving!

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/11/24

Our DMs have been overflowing with a veritable cornucopia of polyamory-related questions, so seeing as tomorrow is Thanksgiving, we thought we'd bring not one, not two, but THREE poly folks to the table to discuss loving in abundance! Morgan (@chillpolyamory) provides peer support for poly folks, and nesting partners Bear & Fifi (@bear.n.fifi) offer intimacy coaching. They were all kind enough to cover topics such as "relationship anarchy," jealousy, "compersion," agreements, scarcity vs. abundance,

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59:48

Episode 174: Natalie Garcia

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/11/17

It's deeply embarrassing for a queer podcast to go 3+ years without featuring the founder of an animal rescue, but that all ends TODAY! Natalie Garcia lost her dog Maggie Mae in an unthinkable accident, but the tragedy inspired her to create MaeDay Rescue. Eleven years later, MaeDay is one of the most popular rescues in Los Angeles - in fact, it's where Nicole got Dobby! Eventually we manage to pull ourselves away from talking about dogs long enough to dig into Natalie's coming out story, which

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76:01

Episode 173: James Barnes, The Trans Coach

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/11/10

Get ready to have your pants charmed off (consensually) by James Barnes, aka The Trans Coach! A corporate trainer who specializes in LGBTQ education, James transitioned almost seven years ago, and today has a wife and two small children. But he started out in a family of missionaries, and was groomed from an early age to be a pastor due to his ability to effortlessly connect with people. James shares how the discomfort of house-hunting as a trans person unexpectedly led him to his dream career, how

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75:21

Episode 172: Mariela Mulder

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/11/03

In a truly one-of-a-kind episode, we talk to American ex-pat and professional jazz saxophonist(!) Mariela Mulder, who has a very unique set of circumstances: for a harrowing year, Mariela taught in Kuwait, and agreed to speak to us candidly about what it's like to live in a country where it's illegal to be gay. From the queer students and adults who risked coming out to her, to the secret location where "women go to meet each other," Mariela shares it all!Insta: @marielamulderMusic:

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70:42

Episode 171: Dave Chappelle's "The Closer"

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/10/27

Because the world needs more white cis people sharing their views on Dave Chappelle!!! In all seriousness, we explain up top why it felt necessary to address "The Closer," and how we hope this episode amounts to getting sh*t out of our systems before having a trans guest on to discuss. We share some opinions we KNOW won't be popular! We do some yelling! Lauren mentions Ashlee Marie Preston a billion times! We hope you'll listen.FOLLOW:@ashleemariepreston@hopegiselle@raquel_willis@janayathefuture

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62:22

Episode 170: Eileen Hanley

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/10/20

It's our most VISUALLY STUNNING episode yet, with a guest whose coming out story spans Maine, Scotland, and Alaska! Eileen Hanley (Crazy Hot: The Podcast) always thought/knew she was bisexual, but internalized biphobia and an eight-year relationship with her boyfriend made her feel like she'd somehow be "lying" if she came out. She tells us about her deliciously awkward first sexual experience with a woman, and explains why EVERYONE is crazy hot! Also, we come up with a fun new nickname for Lauren's

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37:20

Episode 169: Coming Out Day '21!

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/10/11

SURPRISE! It's our annual National Coming Out Day minisode! More and more, we hear folks in our community say that they're "tired" of coming out stories, and would rather see queer people "just living their lives." While we definitely want to see that, too, we not-so-surprisingly think that coming out stories are still ESSENTIAL! We get to the heart of why we so strongly believe this, in addition to talking about celebrities who came out this past year, and some lesser-known coming out moments in

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80:33

Episode 168: Rebecca Ashley

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/10/06

We have a mind-expanding conversation with aroace lesbian and mental health advocate, Rebecca Ashley! Rebecca uses the label of "lesbian" in addition to identifying as asexual/aromantic, and one of the first things we discuss is the ostensible contradiction between those terms. Rebecca does an incredible job of shedding light on alllllll the different kinds of attraction *beyond* just sexual and romantic; plus, we dig into squishes vs. crushes, alternate types of life partnerships, and The Golden

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69:24

Episode 167: Fawzia Mirza

Coming Out Pod ·

2021/09/29

Fawzia Mirza (Her Story; Signature Move) started out as an actor, but soon realized that the roles available to queer, Muslim, South Asian women were not exactly...plentiful. So she began writing her own work, with the goal of centering folks who are all too often just "friends of the center story." We discuss the pressure put on queer female relationships to be EVERYTHING, and the difficulty of having your entire queer identity tied to your very first partner. Also, Fawzia's "Summer of

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