PODCAST

TIL: Absurd Short Stories

TIL

Every day a new absurd story

fiction comedy fiction

All Episodes

1:11

The Whirling Wonder of the Ventriloquist Vegetable...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/09

Welcome to another episode of the Absurd Short Stories podcast, where the ordinary becomes extraordinary, and the mundane turns into the unthinkable. Today, we have a tale that’s just ripe with whimsy - "The Whirling Wonder of the Ventriloquist Vegetable Medley". Gather around, dear listeners, as we dig into the roots of this peculiar narrative. It was a sunny day in the small town of Verdant Valley, a place known not only for its lush landscapes but also for its unusually talented

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3:06

The Unbelievable Tale of the Ballet-Dancing Bear

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/08

Welcome to another episode of Absurd Short Stories, where the mundane merges with the marvellous, and the everyday entwines with the extraordinary. Today’s tale whisks us away to a world where the rhythm of the improbable beats strongly. Let’s dive into 'The Unbelievable Tale of the Ballet-Dancing Bear'. In the quiet town of Beethoven’s Brook, where the most exciting event was the annual pie-baking contest, something extraordinary was about to transpire. Residents were abuzz with the news

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3:26

The Beguiling Tale of the Quantum-Jumping Quail

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/07

Welcome, dear listeners, to another episode of "Absurd Short Stories," where the ordinary takes a back seat, and the extraordinary drives us into realms of delightful nonsense. Today, I bring you "The Beguiling Tale of the Quantum-Jumping Quail." Prepare yourselves for a journey that defies not just logic, but possibly even physics as we know it. In the quaint village of Quirkville, hidden among the rolling hills of somewhere and nowhere, lived Quentin, the quail. But Quentin was no

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1:03

The Peculiar Adventures of the Cake-Juggling Capybara

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/06

Once Sparkles, the heavyweight South American rodent, gained a rambunctious reputation in the Amazonma Circus as an exceptional cake juggler. "Watch out!" the toucan cry, as another chocolate gateau would go soaring through the air under the threads of a creeping vine, with Sparkles, dispatching them in an erratic flutter. One day, a cake went awry, propelled too high into the towering canopy, crash-landing, and creating a frosted blizzard upon the squawking audience. Sparkles' panic

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The Outlandish Escapades of the Yoyo-Twirling Yak

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/05

In the windswept plains of the mountainous regions, lived Yogurt, a yak with an unusual hobby - he was the savant of yoyo twirling. Early each frosty dawn, as other yaks lazily munched on green pastures, Yogurt could be seen coordinating trick-shots and walk-the-dog stunts with effortless panache using his homemade coconut shell yoyo. One sultry afternoon, a band of bewildered mountaineers stumbled upon Yogurt's performance and were utterly flabbergasted. "Good heavens!" sputtered a

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The Eccentric Escapade of the Harmonica-Playing Hedgehog

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/04

In the lively land of Limerick, a harmonica-playing Hedgehog held notorious renown. Harold the Hedgehog was no regular prickly creature, he had a harmonica attached to his snout that he played with a melodious effortlessness so enchanting it made the trees sway to his rhythm. One peculiar day, Harold's harmonica mysteriously vanished. The forest sank into an eerie silence. Gathering his courage, Harold embarked on a quest, navigating the labyrinth of Limerick's dense foliage. When he

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The Surreal Saga of the Tightrope-Walking Tomato

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/03

On a sunny Tuesday afternoon, a tomato named Tim clambered onto a tightrope, attracting a bewildered crowd of fruits and vegetables at the local farmers' market. Tim, garbed in a miniature sequined outfit, held a tiny balancing pole in his leaf-like hands. The crowd watched in stunned silence as the perfectly round and ripe tomato delicately balanced himself on the rope and began to inch forwards. "Why, Tim!" gasped the astonished sweetcorn, Susan. "Since when do you walk the tightrope?"

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The Absurd Antics of the Paddleboarding Pineapple

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/02

There once was a pineapple named Patricia who had a passion for paddleboarding. She lived on a tropical island where the surf was always up and the sun always shone brightly. Using the leaves on her crown as a makeshift rudder, Patricia navigated the turquoise waves with an innate understanding of the ocean never before seen in a piece of fruit. "Whoosh!" Patricia would yell as she rode the crest of a wave, her green crown cutting expertly through the sea spray. The seagulls squawked in

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The Perplexing Tale of the Capoeira-Practising Carrot

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/03/01

Once upon a time, in a place far removed from logic and reality, a Capoeira-practising Carrot named Carl managed to attract quite the following. He had a fiery, intense personality and an unshakeable belief in the power of folk martial arts. His favorite place to strut his stuff was in the dense confines of the garden vegetable patch, which he claimed mimicked the jungles of Brazil. "Stand back, everyone," he would call out, his voice gruff, like two pieces of sandpaper rubbing together

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The Eccentric Exploits of the Apparition-Spotting...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/29

In the quiet town of Beetleburg, perched upon the swaying stalk of a sunflower, lived Hopper, the grasshopper, an unconventional entomological enigma, known for his alleged ability to see and converse with apparitions! "Oy there, Matilda! How's the afterlife treating ya?" he’d chirp cheerfully, addressing a transparent ladybug apparition hailing from Victorian times, according to Hopper's claims. Peaceful Beetleburg was astir when Hopper's whispered conversations with invisible entities

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The Whimsical Antics of the Trumpet-Playing Tumbleweed

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/28

Once upon a sunbaked alley of dusty Arizona, blazed the cactus-clad home of Toby, the trumpet-playing tumbleweed. This wasn't your run-of-the-mill, dusty, sun-bleached tumbleweed tumbling along with the gusts. Toby was a comically curly-twigged, chap with a golden trumpet snugly held in the few thicker tendrils of his unique anatomy. Every evening as the sun dunked itself in the golden-orange horizon, the desert came alive with the melody of his alluring symphonies. "Folks, gather 'round

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The Infinite Intrigue of the Sushi-Rolling Starfish

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/27

In the insignificant speck of an obscure beach far from the world's prying eyes, a starfish named Stella, oddly fascinated with Japanese cuisine, had a peculiar penchant for rolling sushi. Stella spent her days and nights, bending and twisting, immersed in creating perfect rolls of sushi, each more delicious and beautiful than her last creation. Even the seagulls and the crabs of the beach couldn't resist the aromatic allure of Stella's sushi. One day, a one-eyed seagull named Maxwell

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The Zany Expedition of the Poker-Playing Barbary Macaque

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/26

In the far east of Kalimantan’s verdant jungles, there chimed laughter against the lush foliage-- the Barbary macaques run a poker game. Now, these were no ordinary apes, but clever primates with a knack for poker. They had their little card-deck, old and worn yet beautifully handcrafted from coconut leaves. "King Mac, deal the cards," chattered Jolly Jack, the second in command, flipping a banana chip into the fertile green pot. With focus pinned onto the game, a fiery debate sparked

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The Capricious Chronicles of the Polka-Dancing Peacock

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/25

It was a fine morning in Montmartre's zoo when Cyril the Peacock stunned everyone with a twirling feathered polka. Bystanders exchanged looks of disbelief, while the nearby parakeets squawked in time to the beat. Decked out in his royal blue and emerald plumage, Cyril danced like a dervish, feathers fanning out spectacularly, his eyes displaying an previously unseen cheeky mischief. "Well I'll be a monkey's uncle," gasped the Zookeeper, Mr. Poppinjay, his eyes widened to the size of saucer

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The Whimsical Tale of the Saxophone Serenading...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/24

Once upon a time, in a tranquil patch of meadow overrun with neon dandelions, lived a salamander called Sam. Now, Sam was no ordinary salamander. He possessed an eccentric talent that flabbergasted the entire animal kingdom - the scaly amphibian could serenade beetles, butterflies, and beyond using a pocket-sized saxophone! "This one goes out to all you night-time nibblers!" Sam would announce, blowing heartbreakingly beautiful melodies into the moonlit meadow that made even the crickets

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The Bizarre Journey of the Vintage Car-Collecting...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/23

Once there existed a humble lobster named Larry who had developed an inconceivably peculiar interest, collecting vintage cars of all things. Larry, unlike his fellow crustaceans, showed no interest in burrowing under rocks or scavenging food from the ocean floor. Instead, he spent his days exploring forgotten shipwrecks, scavenging for disused cars that had fallen victim to sea demise. "Darn it, Larry, stop bringing these rusted heaps of junk down here! They're an eye-sore!" complained

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The Eccentric Escapades of the High-Jumping Hedgehog

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/22

There once was a hedgehog named Hector, who did not own a collection of needles, but instead held a fascination for heights. So much so that he shunned conventional hedgehog habits and dedicated his life to perfecting an extraordinary high-jump. "Watch me soar," Hector would declare, using acorns as a makeshift starting point. With gusto far greater than his size, he'd charge, leap, and vault over the dew-kissed blades of grass, much to the shock of local critters. One fine morning,

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The Wondrous Whirl of the Whistling Watermelon

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/21

On a sweltering summer day in Silicon Valley, a watermelon happened upon a most unusual artifact — an ancient copper whistle. Curious, it pursed its non-existent lips and blew a smoky note so mellow, so enchanting, that it put the gossiping finches to a pause. The watermelon, who just moments ago was languishing in the heat, felt an inexplicable burst of energy. "Well, isn't this delightful," said the watermelon gaily, its rind trembling with newfound vim and vigor. Rather than simply

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The Unsettling Undertakings of the...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/20

Once upon a bizarre Tuesday, Mike, a humble praying mantis with an unusual hobby, decided to put up a solo pantomime show. No, the praying mantis community wasn’t known for their theatrical leanings, but Mike was anything but your average mantis. “The world needs laughter,” Mike would often say, adjusting his invisible hat and primping his pretend mustache under his oversized leafy home. His insect-sized white gloves, despite their constant stumbles, were his prized possessions. Late

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The Far-fetched Fable of the Sudoku-Solving Scorpion

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/18

In the tiny town of Trinkleberry, a spectacle had arrived and it wasn't the carnival. Meet Speedy, the Sudoku-Solving Scorpion who took the town by storm. Perched atop an old mahogany table, before a gigantic newspaper-printed Sudoku, Speedy scuttled about in a frenzy creating an interesting sight for all spectators. With tiny tweezers held precariously in his miniature claws, he'd pick up a stamp-like number and attach it in the correct square, exhibiting a strange but remarkable aptitude

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