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PODCAST

The Openlove101 Show

John & Jackie Melfi

This is your show to discuss open relationships, the swinger lifestyle, consensual non-monogamy - however you describe it, we"re here to talk about it. Your podcast is hosted by John and Jackie Melfi, the force behind the industry famous colette swingers clubs and the award-winning blog Openlove101.com. With over 20 years of combined experience in open relationships and coaching thousands of couples, they are here to share with you the trials, tribulations, passion, and positivity of love and the

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

09:56

Is sex all about penetration?

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/03/07

#66 - We talk about what to do if someone in a couple is having trouble staying hard during a swinger encounter and address common misconceptions about swingers always having perfect sex. Since staying hard can be challenging for some men, we discuss ways we can take pressure off our male partners and how sex isn't just all about penetration. To learn more about open relationships and the lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

09:17

How to handle a bad swinging experience

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/02/13

#65 - So what do you do if you had a bad time or experience in swinging? Do you throw in the towel and call it quits? Or figure out a game plan on what you can do in the future if it happens again and how to move forward from here. Today we discuss some things to think about in case you have a bad swinging experience! To learn more about open relationships and the lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

18:29

Creating an open relationship with your partner!

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/02/08

#64 - Approaching your partner about wanting to explore an open relationship can be a difficult, sometimes extremely awkward conversation. But it does not have to be. If you can understand your intent and take responsibility for it, then you will be able to frame your proposition in a way that does not antagonize your partner. It’s important to know the status of your sexual relationship and ascertain if either one of you has unmet needs and desires. By laying the foundations of excellent

09:33

Definition of swinging

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/01/24

#63 - What is swinging? Yes we can look it up in the dictionary, but we also wanted to talk about what is behind the scenes of swinging and not just the physical activity of it. Let's talk about the foundation of swinging and what it takes to truly "swing." To learn more about open relationships and the lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

10:33

Does Fantasizing About Someone Else Mean Cheating?

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/01/17

#62 - A couple asked us if it's bad to fantasize about someone else while being intimate with your partner. Is that wrong? Is it cheating? Is it bad? Let's dive into this rabbit hole of fantasy talk and where it could go! To learn more about the open relationship swinger lifestyle, visit: https://www.openlove101.com

13:50

Coming Out and Dealing with Fear of Being Judged

The Openlove101 Show ·

2023/01/03

#61 - You're into what?!? You know what you're doing is wrong, RIGHT? Yes, that could be one of the knee jerk responses you could face if you come out as being in open relationships. Thus, it's understandable if it's scary to not tell anyone about your lifestyle preference. Today, John and Jackie talk about their rather different stories on how each of them came out and the consequences of what happened next. To learn more about the open relationship swinger lifestyle, visit:

22:10

Dating apps, ghosting and social media

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/12/26

#60 - Today we will be talking about the difference between lifestyle dating apps and their mainstream counterparts, if we consider a message non-reply as ghosting, and whether social media makes being in the lifestyle easier or more difficult. We dive into the reasons why being open and honest is vital, and how that can help you to live out the life you want, on all fronts. Finally, we explore some of the cities, states, countries, and continents that are more open to the lifestyle and freedom of

0:00

Single Men Club Etiquette

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/12/26

#59 - For single men entering the club for the first time, it can be confusing to know exactly how to act. Club etiquette is standard for all who attend but it’s important, for single men particularly, to know how they should conduct themselves to ensure that everyone involved is always on the same page. The first thing is to know exactly what you’re getting yourself into, that means doing the appropriate research and, for our club specifically, making sure that your membership documents are signed

07:58

53 Relationship Questions from Jackie

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/12/20

#58 - One of the fun things you can do with your partner is play a little question game that sparks conversation. It's a free and simple thing you can do anytime - during a long car ride, over the dinner table, or just lounging on a lazy Sunday afternoon. What was your first impression about your partner? Have you started to do something because of each other's influence? Do you trust each other? These are just a handful examples and we'll hear a few more from Jackie! To learn more about open

56:09

Open communications and relationship coaching w/...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/12/12

#57 - In most committed relationships, open and honest communication is hard to come by. Men struggle to be vulnerable in an attempt to preserve their testosterone-driven manhood, while women choose not to share because of fears of being dismissed or, worse, misunderstood. Our guest, Alexandra Stockwell, understood the power of possibilities that lay within relationship coaching when she became a marriage and intimacy expert, making the switch from medicine. She found that helping couples through

15:19

Introducing CNM to your partner

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/12/06

#56 - Ok so you're interested in this consensual non-monogamy thing, but how do you tell your partner about it? How do you approach the topic and introduce them to CNM without freaking them out?! Listen to this (perhaps together) and discover how! To learn more about open relationships and the swinger lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

33:00

Unicorns and being sexually open vs being in the...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/11/29

#55 - David and Alex of Desirous Party and Dirty Vibes join us to answer questions about unicorns, why being sexually open is not the same as being in the lifestyle, why it's unfair to be restricted from playing with a certain gender, if size matters, and how toys can affect your relationship and the stigma around it. To learn more about open relationships and the swinger lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

41:56

The UNTOLD Secrets of Lifestyle Events w/ Dirty Vibes...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/11/15

#54 - David and Alex of Desirous Party and Dirty Vibes share how they started their lifestyle events company and how you can best prepare for an event. They give their advice for first-time lifestyle partygoers and how to avoid jealousy and other uncomfortable situations. To learn more about open relationships and the swinger lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

26:44

Intense emotions, lower sex drive and swinging...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/11/01

#53 - Lots of Q&A answered today with our guests J and Angie of Average Swingers: 1) how do you handle the intense roller coaster of emotions in the lifestyle? The high highs and low lows. 2) My gf and I wanted to know if the lifestyle can help with a low sex drive due to a medical procedure? 3) Do you have any inside jokes with your swinger friends that "normal people" don't get? 4) What are your thoughts on connecting (emotions) with people you swing beyond just sex? 5) My wife is concerned about

33:01

Accidental Cheating with J and Angie from Average...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/10/24

#52 - The definitions of monogamy and non-monogamy might be straightforward, but how people interpret them isn’t. What counts as cheating? Are there grey areas? J and Angie from Average Swingers join us to discuss Tracey Cox’s recent Daily Mail article about what she calls 'accidental' cheating and how she believes woke culture is changing the rules on infidelity. We share our perspective on what counts as infidelity and highlight the importance of open, honest communication when it comes to

23:37

Polyamory, swapping partners and going to swinger clubs!

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/10/11

#51 - Today's Q&A talk will be covering why you don’t have to have an emotional partner to embrace open love, advice on how to overcome your reluctance to swap partners if you’re a newbie, and how you can get past jealousy issues if they arise. We also hear the story of a couple who wants to visit a swingers club but each with a different intention. To find out where you can find other women to swing with if you are a lesbian couple, the age of the oldest swingers John and Jackie have ever met, and

28:34

Why we swing

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/10/04

#50 - Monogamy is the relationship model that is drilled into most people from a young age, and while it may work for some, there are other models that work better for others. In today’s episode, we discuss the origins of our open relationship and what we love about being consensual non-monogamists. All relationships, including ours, have their issues, but for us, being intimate with other people has enhanced our relationship with ourselves and with each other in so many ways. Dismantling a lifetime

47:25

Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy with...

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/09/27

#49 - More and more people are talking about attachment theory these days, but many of those conversations focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. What if you’re looking to create secure, happy attachments with more than one partner? Today’s guest is Jessica Fern, a psychotherapist, public speaker, trauma and relationship expert, and the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy. In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals,

19:18

Biggest Challenge in Open Relationships & Trust

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/09/19

#48 - We dive deep into two questions we got asked by our viewers: 1) What's the biggest challenge of being in an open relationship? 2) How do you navigate an open relationship? Boy, did that open a can of worms to talk about it! To learn more about open relationships and the swinger lifestyle, visit https://openlove101.com

13:54

Etiquettes, labels & predetermined definitions

The Openlove101 Show ·

2022/09/13

#47 - Q&A 1) I’m looking for a friends with benefits as a single swinger without getting into a relationship or being a third wheel. Advice? 1) I’m very inexperienced in the lifestyle and accidentally became a unicorn who was invited to a private pool party at a couple's home. Tips? To learn more about open relationships and the swinger lifestyle, visit: https://www.openlove101.com

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