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PODCAST

Magellans at the Movies

Nathan Magalhaes

Welcome to Magellans at the Movies, the outrageously popular* new podcast about all things movies brought to you by Nathan “I-can’t-believe-I-ate-the-whole-thing” Magalhães and his brother Elliot “Who-on-Earth-is-going-to-listen-to-a-podcast-we-make” Magalhães! (*Outrageous popularity pending) Join the brothers Magalhães (Anglicized as Magellan) as they bicker and banter about movies no one has seen or cares about or that have already been analyzed by far sharper minds than their own every week,

arts visual arts

All Episodes

54:40

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Magellans at the Movies ·

2023/01/06

Pirates. During their heyday in the 16th-19th century when the combined rises of mercantilism, imperialism, and naval technologies sparked an explosion of commercial, exploratory, and political sea-travel, piracy was synonymous with murder, thievery, and rape, but in one of history’s most impressive spin campaigns, the modern image of the historical pirate has had a thorough cleansing resulting in the romantic figure of the swashbuckling hero we know today. One of the principal examples of this

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84:02

The Magellans 2022 Recap Spectacular!!!!!

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/12/30

2022, what a great year it has been for people who haven’t been elected British Prime Minister or for people who haven’t bought Twitter. Really, it’s been a good year who did very little proactive. Unfortunately the Magellans have been very proactive this year, taking in a multitude of cinematic offerings and in this gigantic episode they will be bringing their thoughts on the superlatives of those offerings. But not content to merely survey the film landscape the brothers are also sharing their

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42:35

The Muppet Christmas Carol

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/12/23

Christmas, according to the song it’s the most wonderful time of the year. The holiday’s superlative status is derived from different factors according to different people. Maybe you’re really into cholesterol and enjoy stuffing your face. Maybe consumerism is more your thing, and you just love adding to your material wealth. Or, if you’re a pair of emotionally stunted young men from rural Iowa whose only mental escape from the 9-5 cubicle awaiting them was film, Christmas is probably most

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44:35

All Quiet on the Western Front (2022)

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/12/17

War, what is it good for? It’s a question that has hounded philosophers, humanitarians, politicians, Fallout protagonists, and more. Throughout history many people at some point in their life have paused to consider whether humanity’s most destructive method of conflict resolution might be more trouble than it’s worth, and some of those people, upon reaching a negative conclusion, have put pen to paper in the form of anti-war books, paintings, and movies. One of the most famous examples of this is

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52:44

Sky High

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/12/09

When people think about the ways in which they would improve the high school experience, there are probably a wide range of elements they mark out as being particularly painful for all who experience it. Buildings with all the aesthetic flare and functional layout of a three-year-old’s pillow fort. State-approved lesson plans capable of reducing even the most dynamic, vibrant subjects into the educational material of a strong dose of valium. Lunch food derived from recipes written by homicidal

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54:14

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/12/02

We’ve just been invited to an eccentric billionaire’s island home, and you know what that means: vacation time! Grab your trunks, your sunscreen, and ninety-nine bottles of beer to be appended to the wall and distributed communally one by one over the course of the trip because we are paradise bound! We’ll probably be drunk by the time we get there because that’s a lot of alcohol, but, after a greasy burger sees to your hangover, you should get out there and enjoy the island’s amenities! Gaze in

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49:26

Spider-Man (2002)

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/11/25

Spider-man. If you’re a member of today’s youth, upon whose childhood Disney’s film franchises could feasibly claim an executive producer credit, the name probably evokes images of Tom Holland. Spider-man in his most recent iteration was part of an established brand before he even thwipped his first web in Captain America: Civil War, and his further appearances in Avengers movies as well as his own trilogy of smash-hit films have only thrust the character to greater heights. For the cranky,

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57:37

Everything Everywhere All at Once

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/11/18

What if I told you that an infinite set of universes existed and was open to you as long as you’re willing to wear a funny earpiece and lick the nearest traditionally un-licked thing? “Fiddlesticks!” I hear you say. “Why, that kind of poppycock is fit only for speculative fiction!” You’re quite right, O reader of the outdated vernacular, but don’t be so quick to dismiss speculative fiction such as this. When you’re dealing with limitless realities, you of course have a limitless toybox from which to

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50:41

Godzilla (2014)

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/11/11

Nature can be both awesome in its complexity and beauty and terrifying in its power and scale. The diseased raccoon sifting through your garbage can at midnight may appear like a gentle, majestic citizen of the forest, but fail to treat it with respect and reverence and you will know the wrath of nature. That’s enough about how I got my new rabies shots, though, let’s talk about Godzilla, the diseased raccoon of the monster movie world. Godzilla is a staple of the very medium of filmmaking, a

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48:31

Spirited Away

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/11/04

Baths, you may know them as those mini-swimming pools you used to clean off in when you were young and had time for anything more luxurious than a five second rinse in the shower and a few spritzes of Axe body spray, but that’s just because your mindset isn’t cosmopolitan enough. Around the world, baths aren’t always individual experiences where you burn your skin off with whatever toxic waste they make store-brand shampoo out of, sometimes, as in the traditional Japanese sento, they’re group

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54:52

The Shining

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/10/28

Everyone hates winter, or at least everyone who has good opinions on seasons dislikes winter. And every writer has some amount of self-loathing going, otherwise they would pursue a more lucrative career such as working in masonry. And even further, it seems like everyone in the 80s hated their family, so when Jack Torrence took a job being stuck in a hotel with his family for the winter to attempt to write the next great American novel, maybe he should have known it would not go well for him. But it

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73:41

The Magellans on the Movie-Makers

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/10/21

The director. When it comes to the process of making movies there are few positions that hold the promise of greater acclaim for success or more ruthless criticism for failure. Rightly or wrongly, the director of a movie is sort of the face of the production. If an actor turns in a shoddy performance, we might say that they were given poor direction. If the cinematographer has apparently confused a dynamic, engaging visual style with the constant use of Dutch angles, we may assume that the pushy

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51:58

Hot Rod

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/10/14

You know, it’s at times like these that I like to pause and reflect on what makes a good movie. Why do some legends of the silver screen leave us cheering with rapturous abandon, chattering excitedly to our seatmates about the experience we have just shared while others see us walking out of the theater in disgust, our delicious snacks abandoned and our outlook ever so slightly dimmed? I can’t answer that question for you, loyal listener, but I can say that, for me personally, the former category is

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59:15

Memento

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/10/07

I can hardly wait! Memento is unsurprisingly difficult to follow, but those that endure the initial confusion will be rewarded with a truly special movie about how reality is constructed through memory and perception all wrapped up in Nolan’s classically sharp writing and cast of immensely talented actors. If you know anything about Memento it is almost certainly its novel structure, told backwards from the perspective of a man with retrograde amnesia on a mission to avenge his murdered wife

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59:17

Steve Jobs (ft Will Spalding)

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/09/30

A little plastic, a little glass, and a reason to rule all, that is myself- Marcus Aurelius if he was a computer. It is with these powerful words in mind that Steve Jobs (probably) set out to usher in the information age by providing every man, woman, and child with the means to access an increasingly intelligent, versatile series of electronic brains capable of processing and performing ever-more complex tasks in an ever-more complex and evolving digital universe. Was he pleased that the most

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50:25

The Grand Budapest Hotel

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/09/23

Greetings! Welcome to Magellans at the Airport Travel Agency, I’ll be helping you for today. Looking to get away from it all but not sure where to go? Eager for a relaxing stay in a refined, high-class environment? Well let’s take a dive into this file here and see what we can’t scare up for you. Hmm, the Bates Motel? Nice place but the showers are a bit dodgy. Hotel Earle? Run by the Coen brothers but I think it burned down a while ago. The Overlook? I think they’re in the winter season and you DO

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55:52

Se7en

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/09/16

Murder. Hopelessness. Darkness. The creeping, oppressive fear of life’s monstrous emptiness that spreads in the brain like a malignant tumor and drowns all light and joy in a grim tide of crushing resignation. Bleak stuff, yes? Maybe for silly sheeple like you and I who believe in things like hope, objective truths, and some kind of logically defensible moral structure, but for director David Fincher, nihilistic conceptions of humanity’s bottomless capacity for evil is the stuff of Christmas cards

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47:20

Finding Nemo

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/09/09

Fish, probably the most unwelcome thing to find on a pizza aside from maybe a heaping helping of crude oil. You probably don’t think that much about fish as you go through your daily life, and unless you’re a sociopathic dentist trafficking kidnapped fish to your equally unhinged niece to murder, they’re not terribly concerned with you either. This mutual indifference does a great disservice to both our species, however, because, as we see in the 2003 animated classic Finding Nemo directed by Andrew

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44:03

Hell or High Water

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/09/02

So, your mother has just died, leaving her estate in your care, but the rapacious bank with which she did business spent the last few years of her life squeezing pennies out of her pocket with sadistic glee. You’re a divorced dad who wants to do right by your children and leave them the family ranch that has just been found to be oil rich, but the bank is closing in, ready to foreclose and reclaim the house. What’s an enterprising young Texan like yourself to do? The answer, as any hard-jawed,

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46:14

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Magellans at the Movies ·

2022/08/26

If any franchise can be described as rivaling Star Wars’ world-dominating ubiquity, it’s probably Marvel. Beginning with a film charting a billionaire’s efforts to essentially make himself a terminator suit powered by a miraculous new energy source in a cave with nothing but scraps (a premise that, despite Jeff Bridges’ incredulity, comes off as hard-core realism compared to the more . . . imaginative plots of the later films), the MCU currently churns out content at a rate even Call of Duty finds

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