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PODCAST

Beyond Success

Are you a high achiever who"s worked hard, found success, but still feels like something"s missing? Do you wonder what the point of it all is, and long for deeper meaning or love in your life? Welcome to "Beyond Success," the podcast for high achievers seeking fulfillment, happiness, and true purpose. I"m David Tian, Ph.D., Leadership Coach, Certified IFS Therapy Practitioner (Level 3), and a former university professor. I"m also a proud father and husband. I bring two decades of experience,

education self-improvement

All Episodes

34:48

Why Do We Crave Women We’ve Only Just Met?

Beyond Success ·

2023/03/16

=== “Hi David, Why do we crave women we’ve only just met? And why are we depressed when we get rejected when asking for a longer relationship? What's behind it, and how do I tackle this situation? When I meet a new girl, I’m happy and I jump around — my life is full of joy. I think about her all the time, and I’m in a needy state… even though the chances for a long-term relationship at this point are still miles away. So, how do I control my feelings in a healthy way? A way so I don’t get destroyed

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29:30

What You Need to Find Purpose in Life

Beyond Success ·

2023/03/09

Few people know their true purpose in life and even fewer follow their purpose on a regular basis. Most people lack hope, joy, and meaning. It robs them of any happiness they used to have in life. They don’t feel motivated to do anything Struggle to roll out of bed at 10am Procrastinate for hours about brushing their teeth And it looks like the Tsar Bomba exploded in their room They’re chained to their desks. Secretly want to strangle their boss. Hang off the edge of their seats, desperate for

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39:41

How To Succeed With Women

Beyond Success ·

2023/03/02

Do you want a long-term relationship, or do you want lots of casual, hot sex? Reason I ask: a “one-size-fits-all” approach when dating women doesn’t work. What’s worse, is mixing up the approaches, and applying the wrong approach. For example, if you optimized your dating life for short-term, promiscuous sex… Then you’re making it near impossible to find a healthy, happy, and fulfilling relationship. The opposite is true as well. If you try and optimize for the long-term, then your chances of

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40:39

How Sexual Shame is Sabotaging Your Love Life

Beyond Success ·

2023/02/23

“She stares deeply into your eyes, with a playful smile across her face. She races across to the far right corner of the room, and flicks off the switch with her left hand. Your eyes haven’t adjusted to the new lighting, it’s now pitch black, and you can hear her shifting around near the bed… She’s getting undressed. The nerves start to kick in. Your stomach starts to churn. It’s finally happening — and you’re not prepared. After what feels like an eternity, she’s completely naked, with the sheets

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33:11

Most dating problems are therapeutic problems

Beyond Success ·

2023/02/16

For men struggling to get a date, dating techniques do nothing but: Batter their self-worth Make them feel ashamed for not living up to “expectations” of what a man should be Ruin their self-confidence And sabotage their chances of finding true love As these men apply dating techniques in the real world… Their hands tremble, their knees quake, their lips shake, they choke up, and they sweat bullets when talking to a girl. Why? Because dating techniques are a bandaid over a gaping wound — the

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35:07

How To Access Your Natural Attractiveness

Beyond Success ·

2023/02/09

In order to find a loving relationship, you need to become somebody you’re not. You need to rock a new haircut, fill your wardrobe with designer clothes, and hit the gym 24/7. You need to morph into Sean Connery’s James Bond. Charming, handsome, seductive, and irresistible to modern women. Here’s the thing: If you’re seeking a long-term relationship, this is easily the worst advice you could ever listen to! Now, if you're optimizing your life for a short-term fling, have at it. Be the “player.” But

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35:46

Terrific at Tinder, but Terrible at Relationships?

Beyond Success ·

2023/02/02

There are 3.9 billion women in the world. And trying to attract every single one of them is damn near impossible. But when men optimize their Tinder profile for short-term hookups, that’s what they’re trying for — they’re making themselves “mass-market” to attract women. And this never works. Instead, they become a commodity — “just another player.” And when their potential soulmate sees them… She’s physically repulsed — and doesn’t want anything to do with them. So, if being “mass-market” doesn’t

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31:29

Most Men Are Listening to the Wrong Dating Advice

Beyond Success ·

2023/01/26

Do you want to be ‘the man’, a ‘player’, or a so-called ‘bad boy’? I’m going to assume a big, fat no. Most guys aren’t looking to bed 50 women every week. They’re looking to settle down with a beautiful, attractive, and mature wife — not endless one-night-stands with club bimbos. And this is where Andrew Tate, Fresh and Fit, and other pick up artists are steering you in the wrong direction. Their approach is optimized for these club bimbos. It’s great for when you’ve just left a divorce, and want

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40:31

Great at Hookups but Horrible at Relationships?

Beyond Success ·

2023/01/19

Men feel like they lack true purpose and meaning in their relationships. Why? Dating apps and most dating advice promote short-term dating strategies that only work on immature women. These strategies leave men without meaning, purpose, and true connection when they try to settle down. That’s if they can even settle down at all… When you’ve spent years programming these short-term strategies into your mind, it’s near impossible to break these habits. When that happens, you become a repellant for

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43:35

Who Are The Right Type of Women For A Successful,...

Beyond Success ·

2023/01/12

Women. Can’t live with them, can’t live without them. This is definitely true, and there are certain types of women you must avoid like the plague (unless you like dealing with suffering, feeling helpless, and an empty bank account.) Before you think, “Oh yeah, I’ll just avoid the clubs and meet someone with morals,” I have to stop you right there. There’s proof that shows there are women who are “fake, good”, and merely pretend to be moral. And there’s also proof that women who hit up clubs are the

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44:00

Revealing My Personal Therapeutic Journey: Insights...

Beyond Success ·

2022/12/29

There are two big myths most people believe—my former self included—about therapy which sabotage their results. Especially over the long-term. Even if you have initial success on your therapeutic journey, believing in one of these myths can undermine your progress. The result? You're back to square one, and believe therapy just can’t work for you. But it’s the myths, not the therapeutic process itself, responsible for you snapping back into your old patterns. That’s why in this episode, I’m

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29:02

The Secret Strength of Sadness

Beyond Success ·

2022/12/22

Sadness is something most guys struggle with. But it’s the one emotion they repress the most. And this repression leads to increased stress, anxiety, and depression. Not only that, the increase in cortisol associated with stress can lead to changes in heart rate, motivation and sleep. Worst part? Men who repress their emotions are more likely to visit McDonalds, drink Jack Daniels on a Wednesday, and smoke a pack a day — which leads to women finding them unattractive. This creates a vicious

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39:39

How Self-Acceptance Transforms Painful Emotions

Beyond Success ·

2022/12/15

Last week we covered how “pain is not an emotion.” Ok, great. But what do you do about an emotion that feels painful? In today’s episode, you’ll discover exactly how to deal with painful emotions (even if you’ve been to an IFS therapist before and it didn’t work.) You’ll also discover three emotions that immature people consider to be painful. Listen now! Show Highlights Include: How to murder the feelings of anger, fear, shame, inferiority, and anxiety by mastering these 4 emotional skills (our

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34:02

Make One Simple Shift For True Happiness: Pain Is NOT...

Beyond Success ·

2022/12/08

Pain is not an emotion. Bold statement, I know, but emotional pain actually comes from resisting the emotion that you consider to be painful. In other words, it’s not the pain that’s hurting you, it’s the emotion you find painful. And only when you locate the specific emotion will you be able to achieve emotional resilience, endurance, control, regulation, and become an antifragile man. Locating the specific emotion is obviously easier said than done. But you’re in for a treat. In today’s episode,

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42:18

No Part Of You Is Evil: IFS Therapy & Schwartz's "No...

Beyond Success ·

2022/12/01

Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer, and John Wayne Gacy. Without a doubt, some of the sickest individuals to roam America in the 20th century. But according to IFS Therapy & Richard Schwartz’s book, “No Bad Parts”, they aren’t pure evil. But hang on, if they aren’t pure evil, then who is? — and does the concept even exist? In today’s episode, you’ll discover the answer to this question at (5:42). You’ll also discover the concept of “blending” to understand the forces behind evil intentions and actions

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40:48

Psychology of Black Panther 2: Your Shadow Work

Beyond Success ·

2022/11/24

Shadows are repressed parts of you that have been exiled, disowned, and thrust into your unconscious. In other words, they’re still there — and causing you untold amounts of pain and suffering. The worst part? You might think you killed it off, or you might not even be aware these shadows are still a part of you. But if you know how to encounter, understand, unburden, and integrate your shadows, it will result in lasting happiness and unconditional love. In fact, taking these 4 steps are required to

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29:53

Why Your Ego Is NOT The Enemy: How to Resolve Inner...

Beyond Success ·

2022/11/17

Socially awkward guys don’t get girls, that’s the cold, hard truth. But hiding your social awkwardness and anxiety isn’t the answer either. When you repress, exile, and cut out your social anxiety in order to feel good about yourself, you force it further into your subconscious. And when you cram it into the depths of your brain? it’s still active, and it’s still there sabotaging your success, but now you’re no longer aware of it. That’s the bad news. The good news? You can leverage your social

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53:59

Psychology of House of the Dragon & the Myth of Pure...

Beyond Success ·

2022/11/10

Immature boys subscribe to the belief of “pure evil.” These boys need to seek out the hero’s journey. They need to seek out “good” vs. “evil.” So they can categorically define somebody as a hero or a villain. But guess what? Clinging onto this worldview in your 30’s and 40’s is the best way to live a life devoid of passion, unconditional love, and sex. Believing in this outdated ideology causes tremendous heartache. Your protective forcefield gets deployed, physically and psychologically. Because of

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38:41

Why Voicing Your Insecurities is a Form of Emotional...

Beyond Success ·

2022/11/03

Here’s a true story: James was at a party with his girlfriend. There was a hilarious, tall, and handsome dude who kept making her laugh — obnoxiously loud. She was giving him attention and practically ignoring James. And the jokes he made? They fell flat on their face — she didn’t laugh at all. At first, he started to think, “Damn, I suck.” But after a while, his mind began to race with questions: Is he actually funny, or is she laughing way too hard to get his attention? Should I bring this up

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44:22

Psychology of She-Hulk: Appreciating Women's POV

Beyond Success ·

2022/10/27

Do you struggle to understand modern women? Sometimes, they’re downright confusing. They cry when they read a book. They give hints instead of telling you what’s wrong. And they base their decisions entirely on emotion. But here’s a reality check: while the other men who figured women out are having a warm, connected, and passionate relationship… You’re sitting on your sofa at 10:30pm — alone. If you want to date modern women, you need to understand them. But don’t worry. In this episode you’re

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