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TIL: Absurd Short Stories

TIL

Every day a new absurd story

fiction comedy fiction

All Episodes

The Zany Expedition of the Poker-Playing Barbary Macaque

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/26

In the far east of Kalimantan’s verdant jungles, there chimed laughter against the lush foliage-- the Barbary macaques run a poker game. Now, these were no ordinary apes, but clever primates with a knack for poker. They had their little card-deck, old and worn yet beautifully handcrafted from coconut leaves. "King Mac, deal the cards," chattered Jolly Jack, the second in command, flipping a banana chip into the fertile green pot. With focus pinned onto the game, a fiery debate sparked

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The Capricious Chronicles of the Polka-Dancing Peacock

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/25

It was a fine morning in Montmartre's zoo when Cyril the Peacock stunned everyone with a twirling feathered polka. Bystanders exchanged looks of disbelief, while the nearby parakeets squawked in time to the beat. Decked out in his royal blue and emerald plumage, Cyril danced like a dervish, feathers fanning out spectacularly, his eyes displaying an previously unseen cheeky mischief. "Well I'll be a monkey's uncle," gasped the Zookeeper, Mr. Poppinjay, his eyes widened to the size of saucer

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The Whimsical Tale of the Saxophone Serenading...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/24

Once upon a time, in a tranquil patch of meadow overrun with neon dandelions, lived a salamander called Sam. Now, Sam was no ordinary salamander. He possessed an eccentric talent that flabbergasted the entire animal kingdom - the scaly amphibian could serenade beetles, butterflies, and beyond using a pocket-sized saxophone! "This one goes out to all you night-time nibblers!" Sam would announce, blowing heartbreakingly beautiful melodies into the moonlit meadow that made even the crickets

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The Bizarre Journey of the Vintage Car-Collecting...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/23

Once there existed a humble lobster named Larry who had developed an inconceivably peculiar interest, collecting vintage cars of all things. Larry, unlike his fellow crustaceans, showed no interest in burrowing under rocks or scavenging food from the ocean floor. Instead, he spent his days exploring forgotten shipwrecks, scavenging for disused cars that had fallen victim to sea demise. "Darn it, Larry, stop bringing these rusted heaps of junk down here! They're an eye-sore!" complained

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The Eccentric Escapades of the High-Jumping Hedgehog

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/22

There once was a hedgehog named Hector, who did not own a collection of needles, but instead held a fascination for heights. So much so that he shunned conventional hedgehog habits and dedicated his life to perfecting an extraordinary high-jump. "Watch me soar," Hector would declare, using acorns as a makeshift starting point. With gusto far greater than his size, he'd charge, leap, and vault over the dew-kissed blades of grass, much to the shock of local critters. One fine morning,

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The Wondrous Whirl of the Whistling Watermelon

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/21

On a sweltering summer day in Silicon Valley, a watermelon happened upon a most unusual artifact — an ancient copper whistle. Curious, it pursed its non-existent lips and blew a smoky note so mellow, so enchanting, that it put the gossiping finches to a pause. The watermelon, who just moments ago was languishing in the heat, felt an inexplicable burst of energy. "Well, isn't this delightful," said the watermelon gaily, its rind trembling with newfound vim and vigor. Rather than simply

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The Unsettling Undertakings of the...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/20

Once upon a bizarre Tuesday, Mike, a humble praying mantis with an unusual hobby, decided to put up a solo pantomime show. No, the praying mantis community wasn’t known for their theatrical leanings, but Mike was anything but your average mantis. “The world needs laughter,” Mike would often say, adjusting his invisible hat and primping his pretend mustache under his oversized leafy home. His insect-sized white gloves, despite their constant stumbles, were his prized possessions. Late

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The Far-fetched Fable of the Sudoku-Solving Scorpion

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/18

In the tiny town of Trinkleberry, a spectacle had arrived and it wasn't the carnival. Meet Speedy, the Sudoku-Solving Scorpion who took the town by storm. Perched atop an old mahogany table, before a gigantic newspaper-printed Sudoku, Speedy scuttled about in a frenzy creating an interesting sight for all spectators. With tiny tweezers held precariously in his miniature claws, he'd pick up a stamp-like number and attach it in the correct square, exhibiting a strange but remarkable aptitude

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The Daft Diary of the Crossword-Solving Cucumber

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/17

On a drizzling Tuesday evening in a niche grocery store, a vibrant cucumber named Claude gathered quite the crowd of astonished grimacing squashes and confused-looking radishes. Equipped with a magnifying glass and a tiny graphite pencil, he was perched over a half-finished crossword laid out on a miniature wooden lectern. With a bewildered grocery store owner standing silent in awe, Claude was absolutely engrossed in finding the perfect fit for "6 down: Juicy summer fruit (9 letters)." He

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The Delightful Deeds of the Magic-Performing Porcupine

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/16

Can you imagine our fuzzy neighbor ever so dramatic performing magic tricks? Well, then meet Peter Porcupine, the spellbinding maestro of porcupine illusionists! Peter possessed a peculiar hat from which he pulled out all kinds of things - pineapples, pears, plungers, parachutes - all with the flick of his quill. One afternoon as Peter settled into his daily routine, a crowd gathered around him, waiting for that day's big trick. With a grand flair, Peter muttered his magic words, focusing

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The Amusing Anecdote of the Fire Breathing Guinea Pig

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/15

Once upon a time, in the idyllic suburbs of Pepperville, lived a peculiar Guinea Pig named Gatsby. Unlike his kin, Gatsby was not content with the life spent idling away in his cage, munching on hay, and occasionally rolling in his translucent exercise ball. Gatsby yearned for excitement and fervour that these suburban afternoons lacked. Much to everyone's astonishment, Gatsby, after surreptitiously watching an episode of a fire-breathing dragon on television, decided to become the world's

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The Outlandish Odyssey of the Graffiti-Spraying Aardvark

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/14

In the surreal suburbia of Spinwheel Springs, infamous as the land of the upside-down strawberries and the sidewalk-chewing earthworms, there prowled a peculiar creature - Ollie, the graffiti-spraying aardvark. With his superior schnoz, aqua-green goggles, and an unending supply of spray cans in his backpack, he prowled the lavender-lit streets at night, transforming the plain eggplant purple buildings into riveting vistas of magical absurdity. One fateful evening, while Ollie was in the

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The Spectacular Expedition of the Tarot-Reading Flamingo

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/13

In a fanciful marshland tucked between spectacular overlooks of mountains frozen in time, lived Fernando the Flamingo, an outlandish vision in cherry and peaches with a penchant for tarot card reading. Decked out in a paisley waistcoast, often found hunched over a crystal ball with tarot cards fanned out before him, Fernando had a reputation spreading across the kingdom of animals. From sunup to sundown, animals queued to have their fortunes revealed, and interpreted by the pink

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The Cosmic Voyage of the Moonwalking Meerkat

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/12

Underneath the starry firmament, the desolate desert lost its usual sizzle, exchanging it for the cool blue blanket of dusk. Enter Milky Way Micky, the anthropomorphic meerkat with a wildly uncanny talent: moonwalking. "I'm going stellar," he whispered into the winter breeze, his meerkat monocle glistening under the moonlight. His moon boots clung to his tiny paws, ready to do their namesake justice. Suddenly, an alien cucumber - one-breasted and antennaed, dropped down from space. "I

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The Absurd Antics of the Limbo-Dancing Squid

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/11

In the heart of the Pacific Ocean, there was a peculiar phenomenon - Toby, a common reef squid, who developed an uncanny interest in limbo dancing. With his flexible body and trailing arms, he was indeed a sight to behold. "Move over coral, it's time for some under-sea fun!" he would shout, as he gracefully danced beneath an ever-lowering limbo stick made of kelp, dodging any jellyfish that dared to get too close. The creatures of the deep sea gathered around, their eyes wide with

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The Surprising Adventures of the Harmonica-Playing Hare

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/10

In the whimsically warped world of Wackadoodle Woods, there lived a hare named Herbie, who, unlike his brethren, was far more interested in the golden harmonica he found by a waterfall than in burrowing or foraging. Herbie's audacious ambition was to be the best harmonica player the animal kingdom had ever witnessed. "I'll play so good that even the weeping willows will sway and the howling wolves will stop to listen!" he proclaimed. One sunny afternoon, Herbie decided to put up what he

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The Outrageous Antics of the Kite-Flying Kiwi

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/09

In the peculiar pastures of placid New Zealand, there resided a kiwi named Keith with an insatiable fascination for kites. This unassuming, flightless bird was confounded by the concept of anything non-flying soaring among the clouds - a realm otherwise reserved only for those with wings. Keith was not deterred by his lack of flight, instead he succumbed to an obsessive enthusiasm for kite-flying that was both peculiar and captivating. To the utter amazement and, at times, the bewilderment

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The Unbelievable Adventures of the Paratrooping...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/08

It was just an average evening in the small town of Vigglesworth when the first reports of a flying fruit began to trickle in. "I swear it, it was the strangest thing!" Mrs. Pennington gasped to her knitting circle, "I was outside pruning my roses when this... this pomegranate, dropped out of the sky! Nearly knocked my wig off!" The pomegranate in question, perfectly ripe and seemingly commonplace except for its mode of transport, sat innocently on her table, basking in the wonderment of

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The Farcical Fable of the Pogo-Stick-Leaping Lobster

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/07

In the coastal town of Bubbling Bay, a spectacle like no other caught the attention of every seafood-loving citizen. Squinty, the local lobster with an odd penchant for pogo-sticking, was attempting the impossible: he was challenging the town's greatest pogo-sticking champ, a teenage human named Seamus "The Flying Seahorse" O'Brien. To add to the absurdity, Squinty was an unwieldy lobster, his claws clacking constantly against the pogo-stick; nonetheless, his determination won the

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The Baffling Behaviors of the Macaroni Sculpting...

TIL: Absurd Short Stories ·

2024/02/06

Once, in an otherwise ordinary animal encampment in the heart of suburban Nebraska, lived a mongoose named Monty. Monty was not like his peers; rather than spending his days digging tunnels or preying on snakes, he found his joy creating avant-garde sculptures out of macaroni. "Monty!" his mongoose friends would scoff, "What practical use does a pile of pasta have in our society?" Ignoring their skepticism, Monty pressed on with his artistry, his tail twitching with delight as he worked on

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TIL: Absurd Short Stories

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