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PODCAST

Rabbit Troop Sucks

Mysteries Emerge Productions

Transmitting from Denver, Colorado, lifelong friends Paul and Mike (and guests) examine obscure, forgotten about and often overlooked films.

tv & film film reviews

All Episodes

76:44

In Hell

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/11/11

Tournament fights? No! Prison fights and beatings? Yes! There is a lot of hardship in this prison for Jean-Claude Van Damme. He does become besties with a moth, so we have that! Lawrence Taylor will narrate many-a situations to keep it all together. La-Mar joins us on this voyage In Hell. RTS will avoid messing around with JCVD. There is too much Van-damage! Don’t forget, you’re messing around with Van-dingo!

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59:24

Project: Metalbeast

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/11/04

If you develop a plan to inject yourself with werewolf blood, it’s a bad plan! RTS goes on a scavenger hunt for werewolves. Are you going to play a drinking game for werewolf appearances? Well, you are going to be sober by the end of this film. Why does all the synthetic skin have to turn hard? Why is the soundtrack so epic? Why is Barry Bostwick so mean? You might want to join Debbie for that glass of vodka!

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127:00

The Midnight Hour

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/10/31

It’s Halloween! Happy Halloween from RTS! We take a look at this made for TV film from the 80’s! The lead, Phil (Lee Montgomery), wins Halloween costume of the year! Who doesn’t want to fall in love with a dead cheerleader? This soundtrack is killer (all puns intended)! LeVar Burton does not read you any books! Where is our invite to the Pitchfork Cove Halloween shindig? Always invite witches! La-Mar and Nemo join for this RTS Halloween spooktacular episode that includes thrown candy and plenty of

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79:20

The Sentinel

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/10/28

This is our first listener suggestion! Thank you, Andy, for your recommendation. Alison (Cristina Raines) just wants to live her best life in New York in her infinitely large apartment. A bunch of ghost creeps have other plans for her! What secrets does a blind recluse priest hold? Is Ava Gardner your real estate agent? Is Jerry Orbach directing your wine commercial? Is Jeff Goldblum unbuttoning one too many of his own shirt buttons? RTS would still live in a haunted house for the low cost of $400

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101:18

Trick or Treat

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/10/21

Start playing your vinyl recordings backwards. That’s the only way you are going to get the real answers you have been looking for. Also, you’ll get to summon and meet a legendary rocker, Sammi Curr! Don’t blame RTS, Marc Price did it! Also, when are we all going to this pool party we have heard about? Leslie invited us. Is that cool? Gene Simmons is Nuke! Ozzy Osbourne is a reverend! Don’t get sucked into rock’s messages! Why can’t these crispy demon rockers ever play it cool? Wait, this does seem

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100:00

TerrorVision

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/10/14

Attention! Listen to the alien on your television! It’s warning you! But, if you don’t pay attention to that in your pleasure den or dome, then you have options. Fancy a drink made by Spiro? Want to hang out in a basement bunker and eat some lizard tails? Swing with mom and dad? O.D. will share his musical genius with you. Suzy, run while you can! RTS needs your alien satellite feed! There are whispers of some of the haunted places in Denver. If the ghosts don’t get you, the aliens will.

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81:08

Spookies

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/10/07

A man jumps through a wooden door! Is there anything else to know? Probably! What plans did that kid have? How many people are driving around? Why is someone’s dad hanging with these kids? Why are these people here? How long does it take until you become a mansion creep? Isabelle deserves so much better! RTS has many questions about this film. Also, bring back ALL the episodes of Are You Afraid of the Dark?!

en-US

95:43

Fortress

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/09/30

Play it cool at the border! RTS warned you! You are now taking a grand tour of the fortress you’ll be staying in forever. Chris makes his RTS debut within this underground prison! La-Mar joins us as well. This is the most action-packed crowd RTS has recorded. If anyone else joined, we would be taken to the fortress! But Kirkwood Smith would be our companion. So, that’s cool! And, there are many Christopher Lambert laughing impressions. Try not to intestinate anyone!

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101:22

Trancers

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/09/23

The future seems bleak! When coffee is “going to cost you,” RTS would leave that future too! Rico makes his RTS debut to analyze a story about time traveling Jack Deth. The main character is named JACK DETH! Helen Hunt is into it! The Trancer franchise begins here! You think you know someone and sometimes they just turn into a “trancer.” That’s a real squid move!

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82:28

Double Dragon

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/09/16

What kind of ancient Chinese talisman do you have? Our friend Nemo makes her RTS debut to discuss this and a hunky boy smokeshow. Do you want to join Power Corps? Probably not! Whips, fists and mystic powers! 90’s attire and night gangs. Just another night on the town – especially for the Lee brothers. Will Bo Abobo eventually go on Iron Chef? Robert Patrick becomes a samurai demon. What do these gangs do during the day?

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77:36

Martin & Orloff

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/09/09

The dangers of wearing an eggroll costume are revealed. Warn the spareribs! If you have a mayonnaise face, RTS will tell you, friend. La-Mar joins in on the analysis of the analyst. Leave the children’s backpacks out of this! Avoid bathroom sinks! Are you willing to join the Mint Julep Club? Also, “this is going to be good for you.”

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76:48

Brainscan

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/09/02

RTS are jealous over Edward Furlong’s sweet pad! Outdated technology! Yes, please! Games sent to players in the mail! 4 discs to rule them all! Love is when you and your neighbor spy on one another! There’s the Trickster and metal! How many witnesses are there? So, there are more witnesses? Okay, we know this game! More witnesses!

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68:16

Highway to Hell

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/08/29

Chad Lowe is eloping with Kristy Swanson. Hell cop had nothing on Ben the dog! Orpheus and Dante meet the entire Stiller family! Did you think Beezle would be bad? What if his name was Dr. Satan? We also learn the quickest way to hell is sex, drugs and rock n’ roll. Hell cars! Hell portals! Hell cop! What the hell? RTS have a hell of a good time.

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95:36

Freejack

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/08/26

Don’t Call RTS when you are freejackin’ it in San Diego! Mick Jagger is the best friend you could ever have! We have friends too! Our friend La-Mar is back! You do NOT want to be on the spiritual switchboard. Maybe you do. We don’t judge. Boone is simply the coolest! Estevez! Russo! Sir Hopkins! Buster Poindexter! Sherbet!

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66:31

An Evening with Beverly Luff Lin

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/08/19

If you aren’t “feast[ing] on snacks” during this podcast, your loss! Gross drinks from Emile Hirsch! Aubrey Plaza lets in the “party man” and sells us on her broken heart. Why did Jermaine’s character get 14 candies from his grandmother? Adjay’s vegan “Grains of Paradise.” Craig Robinson is Scottish? Jacob Wysocki is hauntingly fabulous. Matt Berry should be in everything! RTS approves of all of this! But forget cousin Puney!

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61:36

Disorderlies

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/08/12

Our friend La-Mar is back! Don’t make bad bets when you have The Fat Boys on the scene! Were they ordered to be the worst or the best? How many Miami gun rooms do you own? Ray Parker Jr. ninjas his way into this film! Shout out to Roller City! Inspired by The Fat Boys, RTS discuss their first video camera dance video. No!

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64:19

Crimewave

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/08/05

Does Sam Raimi know he did this film? RTS does not know. $36 dollar dance contests! After a tussle, women in ornate scarves come to the rescue in Denver. The day Roger Rabbit died. Highspeed chases and highspeed nuns. Did Bruce Campbell say this movie “escaped”? Was he right? EXTRA! EXTRA! What is going on?Our friend Michael Dooley stops by and plays us a song.“Peaceful High Below” written and performed by Michael Dooley.https://www.facebook.com/michaeldooleyproject/

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91:28

Ping Pong Summer

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/07/29

We have our first guest! Our friend La-Mar makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut. Together, RTS goes on an epic summer vacation with Ping Pong Summer! Have you been filling your slushed iced drinks to the top? Have you had a breakdance battle? Where is your smorgasbord of food? Does “sorry” only count in church? Do you even know Tedwardo?

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69:12

She's Out of Control

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/07/22

This movie is out of control! Find out Siskel and Ebert’s hate! Meet a young Matthew Perry. Join RTS and their discussions of this strange tale. Also, Alyssa Milano does not play Tony Danza’s daughter, and that is the biggest crime of them all.

en-US

94:20

American Rickshaw

Rabbit Troop Sucks ·

2022/07/15

All RTS needed to know is that there is an ancient Chinese witch. Boat sex? An Olympian medalist too? How is there even time for rickshaw-ing?

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181 results

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