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PODCAST

Your Other Family

Your Other Family

We’re a pending nonprofit ministry encompassing the storytelling missions of Your Other Brothers and Your Other Sisters. Join us as we integrate faith, sexuality, and gender. Together.

religion & spirituality christianity

All Episodes

01:20:12

YC060: Fear

Your Other Family ·

2020/03/27

The coronavirus pandemic has consumed the planet. In this time of widespread uncertainty, how do we not be afraid? What other things in life cause us dread? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for what's sure to be a "time capsule" of a podcast. We dive into how the current coronavirus crisis is affecting our daily lives, and we also cast the conversation beyond this pandemic -- starting with our relational fears, and then spreading to fears for our sexuality and spiritual fears. Namely, we ask this question:

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01:17:10

YC059: Favorite Blogs!

Your Other Family ·

2020/03/13

We've written over 300 blogs here at YOB since 2015, and we gathered four of our site's authors to discuss our favorite ones -- recorded in front of a couple dozen people, no less. That's right, it's our first-ever LIVE recorded podcast with a digital audience! We invited our Patreon supporters on Facebook to watch and participate in the discussion with comments and questions for this episode's cast: Tom, Ryan, Dean, and Matt. It's a real "Avengers" gathering as each of us reads our personal

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01:15:53

YC058: Loneliness v. Solitude

Your Other Family ·

2020/02/28

Have you ever felt lonely within your sexuality? Do you choose loneliness or does loneliness choose you? Extroverted or introverted, do you embrace regular solitude, treating it as a spiritual practice? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on the divergence of loneliness and solitude. We talk about the healthy and not-so-healthy ways we cope with loneliness and how we seek out solitude. Additionally, we talk about the dynamic of living alone or with others as single gay/SSA men, forecasting

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01:18:28

YC057: Gay Sex and Hookups

Your Other Family ·

2020/02/14

What led to your having gay sex for the first time? Can you separate the physical from the emotional in gay sex? How many times have you had gay sex, and would you consider yourself a sex addict? It's a throwback episode with three of our original YOB cofounders: Tom, Dean, and Matt. We talk with Matt about his journey and struggles with gay sex and hookups. It's a raw, courageous chronicling of his story as a pastor's kid – a story still being written to this day. We also catch up with Dean and

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01:25:16

YC056: Pornography

Your Other Family ·

2020/01/25

Do we talk about pornography too much as the Church or not nearly enough? Do we "talk about talking about" pornography or do we actually talk about it? Pornography is more accessible than ever before and, increasingly, more aggressive. It's a struggle and an addiction that has reached and claimed all people: gay, straight, men, and women. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob as we take a deep dive into the science and story of pornography. It's one of our classic episodes that we're reopening in a new

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01:17:05

YC055: Mentors

Your Other Family ·

2020/01/11

In the spirit of resolutions, self-improvement, and growth in this new year, we're talking about mentors: those wise, sage-like figures who guide us through this life. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob talk about their favorite mentors in books and movies, sharing some of their own mentorship experiences from years past. What qualities do all these figures share in common? We also discuss the concept of mentoring a new generation -- including whether we feel we're even capable of such a thing. It's an awesome

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01:21:19

YC054: Holiday Singleness

Your Other Family ·

2019/12/14

It's an undoubtedly difficult season for many in our community, and we talk about singleness during the holidays: the disconnect, the loneliness, and the finding of hope and joy when hope and joy may feel so far away. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob share their stories of holidays past and present, answering some listener questions along the way, including the concept of spending the holidays with chosen family versus blood family, and whether we've ever been asked if we've found that "special lady" yet. We

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01:47:08

YC052: Chosen Family

Your Other Family ·

2019/10/11

For better or worse, we all start with families of origin. But what of this concept of families of choice? A chosen family that goes beyond blood and DNA? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on chosen family: what it means for the LGBTQ+ community, what it means for believers in Christ, and what it means for this overlap of communities like YOB, Revoice, and beyond. Beyond our awesome conversation on chosen family, it's a special episode for other reasons: our first episode back in the "Jewel

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02:09:47

YC051: Attachment Styles w/ Taylor Zimmerman

Your Other Family ·

2019/09/06

We're diving deeper into emotional attachment with special guest, Taylor Zimmerman! Taylor's blogged at Spiritual Friendship and spoken at Revoice. He's a University of Chicago student currently pursuing his third (3rd!) master's degree with interests in philosophy of religion, theology, and psychoanalysis — and how they all come together. Taylor talks to us about attachment theory and the four attachment styles: secure, ambivalent-preoccupied, dismissing-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. It's the

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01:30:19

YC050: Emotional Attachment

Your Other Family ·

2019/08/02

We're back! After a brief summer hiatus, we return with our landmark fiftieth episode. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob sharing stories of emotional attachment: the good ways we attach to other men, and the not-so-good ways we attach. We open the episode by catching up on our summer trips and activities, and Tom gives some clarifications from our previous episode on "Letting Go." We also have our "manly morsel" segment (it's always been called that), talking about Jacob's shame of Grubhub and what Ryan

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01:38:06

YC049: Letting Go

Your Other Family ·

2019/05/10

Pull up a chair as Tom talks about the recent decision to remove our first 39 podcast episodes. Join Tom, Ryan, Jacob, and Dean for a vulnerable conversation on letting go. Letting go of people, letting go of the past, and letting go of the future. Because if we can't let go of old things, how can we ever let new things in? Before we dive into the nitty-gritty, we talk about Tom's Lenten "masturbation cleanse," his recent trip to a monastery, the "perfect friend date," and possibly rebranding our

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01:36:33

YC048: More Intimacy

Your Other Family ·

2019/04/12

What happens when intimacy with another fails to fulfill or runs out altogether? Can we ever ask for more intimacy? Can we trust again when intimacy is lost? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the second of our two-part discussion on intimacy. We revisit last month's episode with an insightful listener comment about spiritual intimacy as well as a response on same-sex intimacy from one of our straight male listeners! We share more of our most meaningful intimacy stories, including how one particular

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01:49:05

YC047: Intimacy

Your Other Family ·

2019/03/16

Intimacy is scary, and intimacy is vulnerable. Intimacy can be shared or rejected. Intimacy is special and sacred, and intimacy is everyday. Intimacy is sexual and emotional, physical and spiritual. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the first of a two-part deep dive into intimacy. The brothers define intimacy, likening it to a fire, discussing the differences and nuances between intimacy and vulnerability. They also talk about their first forays into intimacy many years ago and what the cornerstone of

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01:37:17

YC046: Church Inclusion w/ Matt Stevens

Your Other Family ·

2019/02/16

Many SSA/LGBT+ people struggle to find inclusion in the church — a safe place at least, and a nurturing place at best. This episode, we bring a very special guest onto the show. His name is Matt, who among other claims to fame (which we waste little time diving into), also pastors at Ryan's church and oversees Ryan's ministry to non-straight people, Intersect. We dive into their ministry relationship and overarching friendship, also discussing with Dean issues of sexuality, singleness, safety, and

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01:22:17

YC045: Self-Care

Your Other Family ·

2019/01/19

Is self-care selfish? How do we commit to healthy practices across all areas of our lives, not just physical ones, as men? Join Tom, Ryan, and Dean for a healthy discussion on self-care to start the new year! We talk about new year resolutions, one-word themes, and bring back good ole SPERM counts (spiritual, physical, emotional, relational, mental) for checking in with one another. There's a lot of diversity in the room as we talk about what good self-care means to each of us. We also add another

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01:31:21

YC044: Jesus

Your Other Family ·

2018/12/14

Who is Jesus? What role does Jesus play in our stories and our struggles? Join Tom, Ryan, and first-timer Kevin for a long overdue discussion on the cornerstone of this entire community: Jesus. We talk about our individual beginnings with Jesus, our favorite Jesus stories, and how Jesus intersects our sexuality and masculinity. We also make a startling revelation about the viral "Vintage Jesus" videos from many years past. We meet Kevin to start the show, and we continue our new intro segment: "The

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01:37:33

YC043: Body Image

Your Other Family ·

2018/11/10

How do men experience body image compared to women? On a physical level and an emotional level, what does it mean to possess a healthy male body image? And how do our sexualities tie into our body image? Join Tom, Ryan, and first-timer Jacob for a discussion on male body image. We talk insecurities about body shapes, friendship desirability, penis size, balding, and our innate sense of masculinity. We also premiere a new intro segment, "The Brother Beat"! Or something. Where you can listen to us

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01:59:45

YC042: Generations

Your Other Family ·

2018/10/12

How have our culture -- and we ourselves -- understood and expressed issues of sexuality across the generations? Join Tom, Ryan, and Marshall for a conversation on these varying generational perspectives: Tom and Ryan as millennials and Marshall as a baby boomer. We discuss how the generations have addressed sexuality and "coming out" over the decades, accessibility to pornography and promiscuous outlets, the "gay" identity and male-on-male cuddling, and the biggest thing in culture we'd like to see

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01:34:26

YC041: Why Side B

Your Other Family ·

2018/09/14

Why do we choose a traditional, "Side B" sexual ethic as men who follow Jesus? Do we choose this life solely for our convictions or in spite of them? Do we live out a gay/SSA celibate life with joy or in angst and suffering? Tom welcomes Ryan and Matt for a discussion on why we're Side B, as opposed to "Side A" (gay-affirming), and where these labels even come from. We include some formerly Side A perspectives within our community and dive into the challenges we face as gay/SSA men of faith. We also

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20:48

The YOBaLOGUE: Teaser

Your Other Family ·

2018/09/01

We just launched our brand new monthly bonus podcast on Patreon: The YOBALOGUE. It's sort of an "epilogue" to our regular show and a continuing dialogue with you, our faithful followers, featuring listener calls, comment feedback, cut content, and more. We'll debut these episodes every month on Patreon just for supporters, but here's a 20-minute sample of our 40-minute premiere! In which Tom suffocates while recording in his studio wardrobe (slash hoping he falls into Narnia). In this teaser, Tom

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