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PODCAST

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya

Studio71 & Confetti Cannon

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya features a pair of grizzled gay ghouls sitting on chairs, holding microphones, and discussing their fabulous lives in Tinseltown. (featuring occasional forays into movies, television shows, and air-conditioning) The New York Times called them models, moguls, actors, influencers, drag queens, RuPaul"s Drag Race contestants, and even humanoids. If one thing can be said about these two preternaturally gorgeous queens" podcast, it"s that Trixie and Katya

comedy comedy interviews

All Episodes

63:20

Nobody's Snowballing in This Economy with Trixie and...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/07/12

In a world where one's public image is everything, we here at Bald, LLC would like to propose a different route: that of radical honesty. Have a small penis? Wear it like a tiny, proud badge. Hairy in all the wrong places? Include that despicable rat's nest in your nude pic. What we're trying to say is stop trying to be something you aren't, and live your life as the disgusting, disfigured, and completely unlovable quasi-human-being that you've always known yourself to be. Follow Trixie:

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49:33

A Hot Masseuse Has Sex with Freddy Krueger with...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/06/28

Do you find yourself frequently having dreams about a burned, disfigured man wearing a dirty red-and-green-striped sweater and brown fedora? In these dreams, does said man make pun-based jokes and threaten to kill you? Has your bed recently tried to eat you? If so, you may have unintentionally roused the ire of a certain "Mr. Frederick Krueger." While a horrific death may be in your future, we offer the following option: propose a mutually-agreed-upon sexual romp with Freddy in exchange for your

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53:04

Happy Pride! Make America Gape Again! with Trixie...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/06/14

Do you frequently experience an itching or burning sensation? Is discomfort in your posterior region a regular occurrence? Do you have night terrors involving killer clowns & bed-wetting that may have led to a divorce? Trix Pads™ with cooling Katyamine lotion are here to save your marriage, ease your discomfort, and soothe that burning ass. Side effects may include chronic perspiration, sudden-onset bilingualism, and the sprouting of a superfluous third nipple. Happy Pride, Everyone! Follow Trixie:

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54:41

A Heavy Pour & Three Oscillating Fans with Trixie and...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/05/31

We here at Bald Headquarters, LLC are thrilled to announce our new collaboration with Fleügghendorfen Air Conditioners! Straight from a snow-drenched chalet in the Bavarian Alps comes Europe's oldest and most-respected HVAC specialist, Fleügghendorfen Air Conditioners. As Trixie deals with the vocal cords of an 80-year-old cigar smoker and Katya is finally on the road to recovery after quadruple hip-replacement surgery, the one thing that brings both of our esteemed hosts a respectable degree of

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67:34

Eating Cheetos on the Floor of the Met Gala with...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/05/17

Actor, drag queen, comedian, & musician Kelly Mantle visits Katya in her dark layer of sewing and sequins! They discuss Kelly's experience on the Trixie and Katya Live tour, her ridiculously long IMDb page, and the self-confidence perils of acting alongside genetically-perfect Hollywood a-listers. You can currently see Kelly on the Trixie and Katya Live tour and starring as Sheila on the OUtTv/Amazon Prime sitcom, The Browns. Follow Kelly: @KellyMantle Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya:

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58:38

Sun-Dried Hot Dog Legs with Trixie and Katya

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/05/03

Some of us have gams that appear as if they were sculpted by the gods themselves on the apex of Mount Olympus. Others, however, have legs that seem like they were dry-cured in the basement of a French farmhouse next to a beautifully-marbled Andouillette sausage. We'll let you decide if this episode is about the former or the latter. To learn more about microdosing THC, just do a quick search online or go to Microdose.com and use code: BALD to get free shipping & 30% off your first order. To

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75:09

Live from the Moontower Comedy Festival with Trixie...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/04/19

To celebrate our 75th episode of the auditory smegma we call The Bald & The Beautiful, we were planning on either making out with strangers underneath the 101 overpass or recording a live episode at the beautiful Paramount Theatre in Austin, TX as part of the Just for Laughs Moontower Comedy Festival. We opted for the latter. Enjoy the utter exquisiteness that is the next 60 minutes of your life, you disgusting heathens. Special Thanks to: Dustin S. and everyone at the

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51:02

How to Properly Wash Your Genitals with Trixie and Katya

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/04/05

As the Trixie and Katya grand tour exits the green, moist forests of the Pacific Northwest and meanders east towards the lumps and bulges of the Rocky Mountains, we check in with our favorite role models to learn about penile hygiene, flatus consumption, and how to make a real difference in this crazy thing we call life. If you aren't properly motivated to better yourself, spread love to others, and join a cult after this episode, then perhaps you should stop listening to this podcast. Follow

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54:21

Revisiting the Art of Dating: "Fisting is the New...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/03/29

As the massive Trixie and Katya Tour starts its journey to a destination filled with tears, sweat, and a ton of dirty underwear, we revisit the low-stress times of 2021 where we gathered in a small studio to chat about Cheesecake Factory's Skinnylicious Menu, wigs in movies, and our unadulterated love of Panda Express's orange chicken. This episode begs the question, "Will Trixie and Katya survive a months-long live tour together?" Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch

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67:34

The Face Giveth and the Face Taketh Away with Trixie...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/03/22

As the sun sets and twilight arrives, the ghosts of magic hour appear on the horizon. Your callused hands work furiously to finish attaching the buttons to a new pair of slacks that hide your tiny calves while simultaneously accentuating the hills and valleys where the boys reside. As you take a break to demand that the lotion be placed into the basket, you place your new face on top of your own, marveling at the gentle beauty and the exquisite cheekbones. Your breath is momentarily lost as you

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57:58

Bald, Fat Silly Putty with Googly Eyes with Trixie...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/03/08

As the sun rises over a stark, barren desert landscape, you open stained hotel blinds and squint your eyes as they adjust to the sudden brightness beyond the glass pane. You catch a slight whiff of your heinous morning breath, careless about its effect on others as it's been nine days since you last saw another human being. The difference between day and night has begun to blur, as time has ceased to exist. Has this Christopher Nolan movie been on for two hours? Four hours? Six hours? Does it even

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52:34

Holding a Large Fish on Machu Picchu with Trixie and...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/02/22

There are times in life when it seems as if the entire world is against you. Nothing is going right, everything feels a bit off, and you just want to crawl into a hole and disappear. In those times of despair, don't fret, honey. Everything you need to live your most glorious life is neatly and efficiently contained in today's episode of Bald. From serial-killer dating tips to useless trivia to cleaning advice for gentleman's relish stains, the following hour of audio will brighten your smile, your

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47:10

A Coat-Hanger Encased in a Hot Dog with Trixie and...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/02/08

The steady advance of technology marches on, continuous and unceasing. In 1900, less than 10% of families owned a stove, a phone, or had electricity. Fast forward 122 years, and through the real-life miracles of latex, hair implants, and 3D scanning, sex dolls are ready to take their rightful place at the throne of humankind. Let us be the first to give a warm welcome to our squishy, clammy overlords. Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch our podcast on YouTube:

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53:12

Gorgeous Devours Cute with Trixie and Katya

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/01/25

The low hum of The Macarena wafts into your one-bedroom apartment, the source of the 90s earworm a vague mystery. Dusk is slowly dawning on the other side of the thin, sun-rotted curtains. Murder She Wrote is just concluding on The Hallmark Channel as you turn off a dusty lamp and grab a chilled Ensure from your mostly-empty refrigerator. After your wig is safely ensconced on a styrofoam bust on the vanity, you struggle to open your blood-pressure pills with arthritic fingers made all the more

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59:22

Building a Fake Hospital in Your House with Alexis Stone

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/01/11

The sun is beginning to set behind a rusty white sign made of corrugated metal on top of a barren hill. A crisp breeze meanders through the "HOLLY", past the "WOOD", and down through the fetid streets of Tinseltown, carrying with it the scent of concealer, latex, sadness, and the sudden realization that Los Angeles is built upon an inherently-ridiculous foundation of misplaced hopes and dreams. It is within this setting that makeup artist, model, and visual chameleon Alexis Stone joins Trixie and

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51:16

The RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 14 Premiere...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2022/01/05

With the season 14 premiere of RuPaul's Drag Race only days away, Trixie and Katya take a stroll down memory lane to discuss the highlights, the lowlights, and everything in-between from the entire history of Drag Race. All from the comfort of a balcony at dusk. Don't miss the season premiere on Friday, January 7th at 8/7c only on VH1! Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo Big thank you to @Phoebe_Bing_Bong for the exhaustive RuPaul's Drag Race research! To listen

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49:01

Perfect Don't Need No Polish with Trixie and Katya

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2021/12/28

As 2021 comes to a not-so-glorious close, let us reflect upon the things that matter most to us in a world filled with death, destruction, and chaos: reupholstered couches, scathing movie reviews, and the solemn act of cancelling otherwise-amazing New Years Eve plans in favor of binging TV whilst wearing a popcorn-dispensing hat. From all of us here at the Bald & Beautiful headquarters, Happy New Years you filthy troglodytes. Believe it or not, we'll see you in 2022. Follow Trixie:

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51:00

A 2014 Hyundai Elantra for Christmas with Trixie and...

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2021/12/21

'Twas four days before Christmas, and all through the club, not a single bear was stirring, not even a cub. The fishnets were hung, by the faux fireplace with care, in the hopes that Trixie and Katya, would magically sprout thick, luscious hair. They were comfy and nestled, all snug in their beds, whilst questions of "Who would play her?" danced through their heads. When out on the boulevard, there arose such a clatter, it was their crazy neighbor Andre, dressed like the Mad Hatter. He yelled up to

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53:32

Sniffin' for Coq Au Vin with Trixie and Katya

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2021/12/14

The fragrant garland has been lovingly hung, a faint scent of Douglas fir is carried on the breeze, and a nip is clearly in the air. As the decorative gourds from Thanksgiving slowly decay in a rusty dumpster next to the backdoor of a shady Thai restaurant, it's impossible to ignore: the holiday season is upon us. And what better season than the winter solstice celebration to discuss the best local Sniffies stairwells & parking garages, memorable visible p*nis lines, and the definition of "too

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64:49

Little-Known Michelle Branch Facts with Michelle Branch

The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya ·

2021/12/07

From music stardom as a teenager to a Grammy win with Santana to numerous appearances on TV and Film, Michelle Branch has been an icon of rock and pop music for more than two decades. This week, the insanely talented singer and songwriter joins Trixie to discuss her illustrious career, her family life, and everything in between. Follow Michelle: @MichelleBranch Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To listen to our podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT Don’t forget to

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