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PODCAST

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life

We are Simon & Lorra. A married couple. Mum & Dad to three kids... One in his 20s, one at uni, one fast approaching her teens. We love each other to bits but we also realise that we want to kill each other a lot. One day that quote will probably be used against one of us in a court of law. Each episode, we"ll chat about our marriage, love life, kids, London, relationships, anything relevant in the news and we"ll recommend anything we"ve seen, played, read or listened to. Contact us on

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

29:42

#HAWSTL 062 - CHOCOLATES & MOONSHINE

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/11/22

Hello. We recorded this one a few days ago but it's been full-on and we forgot to upload it.Today we talked about...• What each of us brought into the studio.• Having a bad morning.• Not the UAE anecdote they were expecting.• Lorra's haircut.• Turn-offs.We're going to try to get a few more pods in before Simon's 50th (Thursday 25th Nov).See you next time xSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/husband-wife-sentenced-to-life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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1:00:32

#HAWSTL 061 - 7 PILLARS TRIBUTE (RIP-OFF)

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/11/11

We thought we'd record a few specials on the run-up to Christmas, doing our own versions of some of the podcasts we listen to, love, admire, etc. Today it's Alan Davies' Seven Pillars - Which we highly recommend. Alan is a lovely bloke and a great interviewer. It's also worth checking out his biography (audiobook) 'Just Ignore Him', a very moving account of his childhood life. Back to today's podcast... Alan asks his guests about seven things in their lives. The subjects are...• Celluloid (film,

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35:05

#HAWSTL 060 - PERCY PIGS ARE OVER-RATED

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/11/06

Hello you! Sorry it's been a while. Illness has swept through the family and, as you'll hear, has landed on the worst person possible! Today we talked about...• Simon (you guessed it!) feeling really poorly.• Simon out gigging during unsociable hours.•Looking forward to hosting Christmas Fayres.• Honey podcasting and setting up a school business.• Lorra expecting a Christmas Megamix.• Reminiscing about Fantasy Reboot.• This year's Christmas adverts (links below).• Marks & Sparks upping their

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30:14

#HAWSTL 059 - THERE'S BEEN A MUH-DAH!

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/26

Hello you! On today's episode, we talked about...• Simon considering recorded some new music for the podcast.• Simon's Loaded Veggie Sweet Potatoes - Look: https://bit.ly/3EkMdfc• Poorly kids and a sofa-ruining lateral flow test.• Halloween preparations.• Your cheesy-beans-on-toast feedback.• Opening the Pandora's Box of how much should be spent on Simon's 50th.Today we recommended...Greg Davies in 'The Cleaner' (trailer): https://bit.ly/3GoeAKXThe new 'Blankety Blank' (trailer):

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41:04

#HAWSTL 058 - CANDLES & IMODIUM

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/23

Hello you! We're back. From the last pod to now was supposed to have been a very sexy time but it didn't quite work-out like that. It never does, right?Today we talk about...• Illness sweeping through the house.• Poorly women vs poorly men.• Levels of in-house illness & the signs.• Garlic & wine armpits.• A 2am (forced) dad-drive.• Calling-out 'pretentious tea twonks'.• The cheesy beans on toast argument.• Lorra's PS$ 'Overcooked' addiction.• Discovering 'GeoGuessr' (late to the party).•

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31:49

#HAWSTL 057 - SEX BACK-HANDERS

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/20

Hello! As you'll hear, Lorra was on the verge of 'erupting' throughout this podcast. It's a more thrilling ride than Die hard III. Today we talked about...• A dodgy & very late burger delivery.• Wife's organising what Simon calls "Sex Back-handers'.• Immodium as foreplay.•How do we fare on a big list of parenting fails.• Emails AND videos on good parenting from school.• Simon's cousin has a baby.• His text reaction.• His voice text reaction.We had to end abruptly for obvious reasons but we'll be

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35:27

#HAWSTL 056 - IT'S A SPORTS MASSAGER... HONESTLY!

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/17

Hello you! We popped-in to the spare-room-cum-studio for a quick (although not as quick as Simon would've liked) chat.Today we talked about...• The studio temperature.• The Marks & Sparks poll result.• The start of Christmas shopping.• Excessive advent calendars.• A quick veggie review of a brunch we went to.• The monster that is post-brunch-Lorra.•Simon's flies & Michael McIntyre's nut.• Poorly Honey's Covid test.• Simon's first radio show from Expo 2020.• His subsequent dad-brain

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1:00:01

#HAWSTL 055 - SCRATCH MY BUM SPOT

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/15

Hello you! It's Friday morning and, for the first time in months, we're back in our home studio to record ep.55 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life) and it's a WHOPPER today... What the Beano or Whizzer & Chips used to call a 'bumper edition'!Today we talked about...• Riding high in the charts against some of our favourite podcasters.• Your votes and reviews (Please leave us one!)• Lorra's bin-recycling laminate.• Sick kids.• Driving on "parental daze" auto-pilot.• The curry-on-rice

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41:01

#HAWSTL 054 - BADLY-TIMED LIBIDO

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/12

Hello you! Another recording in the car, as we sat in a car park (the Cat Stevens car park) waiting for Kid3 to finish performing arts. Today we talked about...• Last episode's depression-cast.• Double broken air-conditioning nightmare.• Sleeping (or not sleeping) on the floor.• Toddler tantrums vs moody teens.• The Squid Game email we got from school.• Lorra got her nails done... For someone else's birthday!• What's the male equivalent to women getting their nails done?• A falling-out and Lorra's

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40:22

#HAWSTL 053 - SHAG SHEET & CHUNDER CHART

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/10

Hello you! Well, after several misfires and an entire recording we decided to bin, we finally got around to recording an episode. It's been a week. Far too long but, as you'll hear, we having been in a great frame of mind. And, as it World Mental Health Day, we thought it appropriate and important to put this out.Today we talk about...• Broken air-conditioning.• The mental pain of missing our son.• Free time dilemma.• Simon talks about depression.• Renewing Lorra's car. A lovely financial surprise!•

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30:21

#HAWSTL 052 - BACK TO LIFE BACK TO REALITY

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/03

Hello. Second attempt to upload this one as it all disappeared last time. We recorded in our Dubai kitchen as Simon cooked roasted red pepper linguine and Lorrra sat in the Lay-Z-Boy recliner drinking a caramel & hazelnut latte. You can see the finished dish here: https://bit.ly/2ZSqKeyToday we talked about...• The cyclone heading our way.• Lorra's hatred of Simon's Insta foodie posts.• The shock of the early rising.• Separate school drop-offs.• Back to work for Simon.• Lorra's mid-morning

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29:17

#HAWSTL 051 - THE PERFECT BAD BOY PERCENTAGE

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/02

Hello you! A quick catch-up as we walked Charlie around the lake behind our villa. It was too hot. We went from normal to drippy during this recording... And not in a good way. Today we talked about...• Back to work eve.• An urge to watch the new James Bond.• Getting back in the kitchen with veggie enchiladas.• Lorra not liking the word 'poo'... And some worse suggestions.• Dubai parents' complex pick-up/drop-off schedules.• Lorra's dread of an empty house tomorrow.• The travel playlist.• The bad

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33:47

#HAWSTL 050 - COCKTOBER

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/10/01

Hello you! We recorded today's podcast on a sunn7, blue-skied, 40ºc drive to Parkview Hospital's Covid Drive-Thru, so Simon could get his, erm, fit-to-work test done. Today we talked about...• The rules of radio.• Simon's different October hashtag list.• Lorra's car clock discrepancies.• Blowvember.• The launch of Expo 2020 Dubai.• Our emotionless, problem child.• A Leo update.• How to trick him into texting us.• Lorra's 'Would You Rather?'• The best & worst things about being back.• An

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45:23

#HAWSTL 049 - A 7-HOUR FLIGHT THAT TOOK 39 HOURS

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/30

Hello! Happy International Podcast Day. It'd be rude not to do one, right? Today, from our garden in Dubai, we talked about...• Being honest about depression.• Leaving the lovely cottage.• One last Asda.• Being useless at doing 'Britain'.• Shady Skoda Sat-Nav.• Dad motorway warnings.• Petrol shortage shenanigans.• Missing flights.• People being horrible to Emirates staff.• Excess baggage pillock.• Moving-in to Caffe Nero.• Missing another flight.• Expensive hotel and pizza decision.• Late results.•

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33:31

#HAWSTL 048 - BRISTOL DIARIES: OUR LAST GOODBYE

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/27

Hello you! This is the final installment of our 'Bristol Diaries' podcasts. We've recorded it on Sunday evening, sitting in the garden of our cottage, shortly after getting back here, after saying goodbye to our 'fresher' son, Leo, until at least Christmas. We will be in the car before 8am, heading to Heathrow and, eventually, Dubai, so we won't have time for recording and editing in the morning. We talked about...• Getting our 'Fit to Fly' tests at Cabot Circus.• Walking through town, accompanied

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37:48

#HAWSTL 047 - BRISTOL DIARIES: BAD NEWS FOREPLAY

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/26

Hello on what is our last full day in the UK. We're both feeling very emotional as several chapters are about to close. Today we talked about...• Feelings!• Leo's bike & an awkward drop-off.• The market and the dungarees.• Bristol's lack of good Italian restaurants.• Bristol getting horrible again.• The brilliant M-Shed & Bristol's history.• Crepes & people watching.• Walking through town as it closed.• Not the Saturday evening we'd hoped for.• Strictly Come Dancing.• Not making sweet,

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41:31

#HAWSTL 046 - BRISTOL DIARIES: EXTINCTION REBELLION...

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/25

Hello you! A very overcast morning in the cottage garden today. Today we talked about...• Finishing Bob Mortimer's fantastic audiobook.• Feeling fed up about snarky teens.• Honey & Mamma Mia in Dubai.• Everywhere for kids being closed.• Slightly cheaper Bristol parking.• A badly-designed bridge for vertigo.• The shops in Bristol Arcade.• Arabic fail.• Extinction Rebellion.• Christmas Steps and a lot more hills.• Cabot Tower & Brandon Hill Park.• More squirrel-whispering.• Walking along the

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1:03:00

#HAWSTL 045 - BRISTOL DIARIES: UNI MOVING-IN DAY

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/24

Hello you! Well, a massive day yesterday. A day that most parents are building up to from the day their babies are born. A day of high emotion, mixed feelings, stress, heartache, pain, sadness, grief... The lot. A slightly longer pod today because there was a lot to talk about. We start with Lorra in tears, as the weight of er first morning with her boy hit home. We also talked about...• The comfort of Radio 2.• The default direction for stirring.• Leo getting up early for once... And his nerves.•

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31:50

#HAWSTL 044 - BRISTOL DIARIES: SEVENTY FIVE QUID

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/23

Hello you! It's D-Day, the D standing for 'Drop-Off'. It's a biggie. It's something we've been building to, stressing about, fearing and dreading. Towards the end of this podcast, Lorra gets very emotional. IF you're going or have gone through the university drop-off, you'll get it. However, we also caught up about yesterday and this lot...• A Fred West update.• Heading for a big day out but feeling flat.• Wookey Hole via Rock of Ages.• A picnic at Cheddar Gorge.• A grumpy sweet-shop tosspot.•

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50:11

#HAWSTL 043 - BRISTOL DIARIES: FRED WEST INSANE...

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/09/22

Hello. First of all, apologies for the lack of podcast yesterday. We explain all on the podcast. It all got a bit heavy. So, today we talked about...• The failed podcast.• Lorra's inability to work out directions.• Taking Betsy Pearl in our morning walk.• A visit from Lorra's parents.• Simon's bridge nerd-out.• Clifton Suspension Bridge and fear of falling.• A grim Burger King.• Watching "Everybody's Talking About Jamie".• Richard E Grant's bad Sheffield accent.• Disappointing Asda experience.•

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