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PODCAST

Social Skills Coaching

While everyone wants to make themselves and their lives better, it has been hard to find specific, actionable steps to accomplish that. Until now... Patrick King is a Social Interaction Specialist, in other words, a dating, online dating, image, and communication, and social skills coach based in San Francisco, California. He’s also a #1 Amazon best-selling dating and relationships author with the most popular online dating book on the market and writes frequently on dating, love, sex, and

society & culture self-improvement

All Episodes

19:13

Getting Kinky

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/26

• Exploring kinks, however, is never a bad thing. To do so, it’s important to understand how a kink you come across, including yours, may have arisen. There are typically five theories on the matter: adjacent brain theory, Pavlovian conditioning, pain, gross-out theory, and subjective normal theory. • Yet, knowing your kinks and how they formed is of no use if you don’t feel comfortable enough in bringing them up. You may find it easier to bring it up as a side topic purely to gauge reactions

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12:51

Communication Started Out Nonverbally

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/23

Body language has a much broader range of possible interpretations. Generally, a relaxed body takes up space, while an anxious body contracts and wants to conceal and comfort itself. There are too many specifics to list in a bullet point, but just keep in mind that the only true way to analyze body language is to first know exactly what someone is like when they are normal. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at

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13:04

The Laws Of Logic

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/19

Finally, it’s important to understand logical arguments—especially illogical arguments. This is how you determine the truth and validity of what is being said. We hear these every day but may not pick out their logical flaws. You can think of these as a combination of math and argumentation. There is the conditional statement (X -> Y, true), the converse statement (Y -> X, usually a flaw), the inverse statement (Not X -> Not Y, usually a flaw), and the contrapositive statement (Not Y ->

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07:28

What Actually Turns Women On

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/16

Make a woman feel safe, understood, and respected, and sex will never be an issue. Make her feel valued for the unique person she is. Play with mystery and discovery. Be genuinely interested in what makes her happy and what her needs are, rather than approaching the relationship primarily with your own needs at the forefront. Oh, and it doesn’t hurt to tell her often that she’s hot stuff.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttractionShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at

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09:06

Meet Your Own Needs

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/12

Obstacle 2 is a VERB mindset—playing victim, acting entitled, awaiting rescue, or blaming others. A healthier mindset is based on taking responsibility for our own thoughts, feelings, and experiences. We can do this by first noticing feelings, asking what unmet needs create that feeling, and then exploring ways to meet this need ourselves.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more

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10:04

The Critical Thinker

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/09

Next, we come to critical thinking. Critical thinking is concerned with questioning answers rather than asking questions. It seeks to take nothing at face value and provide a three-dimensional and nuanced view of a topic or stance. Without that, you are by definition jumping to conclusions or relying on someone else’s word—an opinion without inquiry is a weak one. We can practice critical thinking through a series of questions.Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3n6a2fzShow notes and/or episode

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14:47

Everyone Has The Ability To Be A Great Lover

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/05

Many sex tips focus on either specific techniques or exploring kinks to improve your sex life, but that’s not what really matters. Studies have shown eight specific elements of great sex: presence, connection, intimacy, communication, authenticity, bliss, exploration, and vulnerability. This is empowering because it means literally everyone has the ability to be a great lover; it just takes time, energy, and attention.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttractionShow notes and/or episode

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14:26

The Body, The Face, And Clusters

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/05/02

Finally, we get right into the thick of it. How can we read and analyze people just through sight and observation? We cover two primary aspects: facial expressions and body language. It’s important to note that though many aspects have been scientifically proven (with physiological origins), we can’t say that simple observations are foolproof. It can never be definitive because there are too many external factors to take into account. But we can better understand what typical things to look for and

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10:18

A Skeptic’s View

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/28

One methodical way to seek truth and simulate curiosity is by embracing skepticism. No, it’s not about being cynical or simply refusing to believe what people tell you. Rather, it’s refusing to blindly believe what people tell you and requiring evidence and facts. In this way, a skeptic is quite similar to a scientist utilizing the scientific method. No answer is required here, and only understanding is sought. Skepticism requires slowing down your thoughts and thinking like a scientist.Hear it Here

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14:11

How To Own Your Emotions

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/25

• The purpose of all communication, whether we know it or not, is to meet our needs. We can become better communicators (and improve our relationships) if we learn to properly understand, take responsibility for, and meet our own needs before we approach others. We can also improve communication by learning to proactively meet our own needs. • We can take steps to minimize or remove the obstacles standing in the way of effective communication. • Obstacle 1 is not knowing ourselves and

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10:45

Defense Of The Ego Is A Nasty Habit

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/21

Loss, rejection, uncertainty, discomfort, humiliation, loneliness, failure, panic . . . all of these can be defended against using certain mental tricks. These mechanisms are there to protect us from experiencing negative emotions. They work in the moment, but in the long run, they are ineffective since they rob us of the opportunity to face, accept, and digest inevitably negative emotions as they crop up. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are

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11:25

Curious As A Cat

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/18

The first and most natural way to probe below the surface is through cultivating curiosity. There are five types of curiosity, each of which can be a motivation for asking questions: joyous exploration, deprivation sensitivity, stress tolerance, social curiosity, and thrill-seeking. However, curiosity will rarely come easily or naturally, especially about things we don’t have an innate interest in. So, we need to generate that same approach through other methods.Hear it Here -

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08:29

Defense Of The Ego

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/14

Finally, we come to defense of the ego. This is one of our most powerful motivators, but it is mostly unconscious. Simply put, we act to guard our ego from anything that would make us feel psychologically less. In doing so, it is so powerful that it allows us to bend reality and lie to ourselves and others—all outside of our conscious awareness. Defense mechanisms are the ways that we avoid responsibility and negative feelings, and they include denial, rationalization, projection, sublimation,

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07:43

Acts Of The Amorous Nature

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/11

• At this point in the book, you may have a better understanding of how to reach your goal of mating. However, in reality, your goal is sustained mating within a relationship. How can you make sure the sex is good enough to do that? • Many sex tips focus on either specific techniques or exploring kinks to improve your sex life, but that’s not what really matters. Studies have shown eight specific elements of great sex: presence, connection, intimacy, communication, authenticity, bliss,

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15:49

Battle Social Influence

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/08

The last way we must struggle to keep an open mind and clarity of thought is concerning our social influences. The people around us can determine what we think and do, no matter how hard we try. This was proved in the Asch Conformity Test and the Milgram Shock Experiment. It doesn’t matter how open-minded you are; your environment can push you strongly in one way despite your best intentions.Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3n6a2fzShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at

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10:34

The Pyramid Of Needs

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/06

Next, we move to the pyramid of needs, otherwise known as Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. It states that we are all seeking various types of needs in various points in our lives; when you can observe which level other people are in, you can understand what they are seeking out and motivated by. The levels of the hierarchy are as follows: physiological fulfillment, safety, love and belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization. Of course, this model, as well as the next one, also functions

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12:43

Selflessness Is Sexy

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/04

Despite our own internal confusions, there are certain scientifically proven traits we do seek in mates that are more related to biological imperatives. We are subconsciously drawn to excitement and arousal, fulfilling gender-specific arousal triggers, a sense of humor, and masculine and feminine voices. Research shows that while smiling and expressing happiness can make people like and trust you, when it comes to relationships and dating, this is not always the case: men find smiling, happy women

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12:06

Listening And Nonviolent Communication

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/04/01

The four principles of Marshall Rosenberg’s non-violent communication are: observations, feelings, needs, and requests, in that order. First make neutral observations instead of judgmental evaluations. Next, seek to explore feelings and not opinions. Be careful about using “you” statements or attributing blame, and instead take responsibility for your own experience. Next, connect your feelings with any unmet needs with the format: “I feel X because I need Y.” Finally, end with a respectful and

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18:10

Our Inner Child Still Lives

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/03/30

Any discussion on motivation must begin with the pleasure principle, which generally states that we move toward pleasure and move away from pain. If you think about it, this is omnipresent in our daily lives in both minuscule and huge ways. As such, this actually makes people more predictable to understand. What is the pleasure people are seeking, and what is the pain they are avoiding? It’s always there in some way.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts

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11:11

Triggers For Attraction And Arousal

Social Skills Coaching ·

2022/03/28

Despite our own internal confusions, there are certain scientifically proven traits we do seek in mates that are more related to biological imperatives. We are subconsciously drawn to excitement and arousal, fulfilling gender-specific arousal triggers, a sense of humor, and masculine and feminine voices. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttractionShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation

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284 results

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