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PODCAST

Braised Bits

Jesse Eigner and Lance Pauker are two comedy chefs in New York City. On stage, they constantly cook up piping hot bits that might burn your mouth if you"re not careful. But in your earbuds, the bits are braised, slow cooked to precision and carefully considered. Braised Bits is an hour of observational humor, good humor ice cream bars, and even some Humor Esiason mixed in. We"re talking food, we"re talking sports, we"re talking awkward situations and the never-ending tide of technological

comedy improv

All Episodes

01:48:45

#72 Weather Locklear

Braised Bits ·

2021/04/16

Support the podkitchen on patreon! 00:00-00:30: Lance reads an ad for pod sponsor Joey Fatone it Up 00:45-03:00 : The chefs burst into the kitchen and realize they are "getting up there." 03:00-10:00 The chefs plug ugly the patreon, talk Zachary Snackery's papal neighbor, and chat some meal prep pertaining to the padmadres briskets. 10:00-12:30: The chefs chat more about egg and pepper hero's and the sopranos. 12:30-27:00 So seductive. Jesse takes us to the Comedy Shop and shows us what he's

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01:30:28

#71 Laminate Bargaetze

Braised Bits ·

2021/04/09

Support the podkitchen and check out the Braised Bits patreon! patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00-00:57- Jesse reads an ad for Aaron Boones’ Looney Tunes. 00:57-1:31- Jesse wakes up Lance from his meditation and the chefs dip into a fresh episode of Braised Bits. 1:31-2:55 - Lance and Jesse reminisce about the dream cast of games that the dreamcast gaming system had back in the Jason Day. 2:55- 5:00 - The chefs discuss the fears that come along with living next to a golf course as well as Jesse’s

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01:31:45

#70 Inoculated on Heaven's Door

Braised Bits ·

2021/04/01

Support the podkitchen on patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00-00:30: Lance reads an ad for new pod sponsor Ross Perot-gies 00:30-7:00 The chefs unleaven another episode intro, and Jesse devises a late night show in which Lance is the host. Lance notes that this would be the least enthusiastic late night show of all-time. 7:00-18:30 The chefs reminisce about the "Battle" option of Mario Kart 64, and then dive head-first into some juicy meal-prep involving both Podfathers--Droad ordering an

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01:41:37

#69 Precise Is Right

Braised Bits ·

2021/03/26

Support the podkitchen on Patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits Show notes: 00:00-00:30: Jesse reads an ad for this week's sponsor, The Arkansas Razorbacks Braiserbacks 00:30-2:00: The chefs start out this episode by flexing their Eric Musselman knowledge 2:00-12:00 It's the 69th episode, which takes Jesse back to Spanish class and Pillsbury Innuendo-boy. The chefs then discuss the strange world that is public school foreign languages classes in America. Lance bags up Jesse when he reveal

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01:29:14

#68 Grayson Allen Wrench

Braised Bits ·

2021/03/19

Check out the Braised Bits Patreon! patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00 - 00:30- Lance reads an ad from previous sponsor Waluigi Squeegees. 00:45- 02:18- The chefs dip into a fresh episode of Brasied Bits and Jesse shows off a new pimp my ride. 02:22-04:15- Lance is off his equilibrium due to daylight savings and checking accounts. 04:15- 06:07 - Lance adjusts all of his clock goodens to the new time and Jesse admits it will probably take him until Marcus Maye to do it. 06:07- 08:39 - The chefs reminisce

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01:41:22

#67 Kebab Woodward

Braised Bits ·

2021/03/12

00:00-00:38- Lance reads an ad for Al Gore-Tex. 1:15-2:18 - The chefs fully submerge into the episode and discuss how beautiful the Floyd mayWeather was on the day of their recording. 2:18-3:17-Jesse and Lance reminisce about how their teachers use to take the classes outside occasionally on a Nice, France day. 3:17-5:06 - The chefs officially welcome the braiserbacks to the episode and discuss the true value of a 2/3 fraction. 5:06-8:34- Lance unintentionally submerges himself in the nice weather

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01:34:17

#66 GabaGooGoo Dolls

Braised Bits ·

2021/03/05

Support the podkitchen on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits 00:00-00:30: Jesse reads an ad for this week's sponsor, Immanuel NesQuickly. 00:30-05:00 The chefs have trouble turning on the oven this week and wonder if they're no longer a la mode. Lance affirms that he's is a median man. 5:00-9:15: The light enes banter continues as the chef discuss the New York City restaurant health rating system, one you have to C to B-lieve. Pod nemesis Eric Seidel gets fleshy and burns Jesse with a

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01:45:04

#65 Elon Must Listen

Braised Bits ·

2021/02/26

Support the podkitchen on Patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00-00:30: Lance reads an ad for this week's sponsor, Bill Burrata. 00:30-04:30: The chefs note that the pod is now old enough to get the COVID vaccine, and they talk their jersey numbers as youths. Lance does a Ms. Puff act out, and Jesse invents a new COVID vaccine sitcom. 04:30-06:00: Lance shouts outs Aaron Z for leaving a great review Barrymore. They then plug the patreon, and use valuable podcast time to discuss show logistics

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01:29:57

#64 Cuban Whistle Crisis

Braised Bits ·

2021/02/19

00:00–00:30- Jesse reads an ad for old spice girls. 00:30-3:00- The chefs submerge Ibaka into the podkitchen with a whistle and a heads up to the Braiserbacks that this episode was recorded a week Cleanthony early. 3:00- 04:26- The chefs discuss the Joy Behar of cooking up Braised Bits but how tedious some of the kitchen cleanup can be. 04:26- 7:34- Jesse and Lance cher how family members have tried to assist in their comedy careers and how they don't reveal parm that they do comedy to strangers

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01:46:00

#63 Greta World Peace

Braised Bits ·

2021/02/12

Support the podkitchen on Patreon! Patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00- 00:34- Lance reads an ad for Russel Crowflex. 00:43-2:52- The chefs fully submerge into a fresh episode and Jesse reveal parms that he once bought an ab belt from an infomercial. 2:52-4:31- Lance gives credit to Kate for coming up with a new term (submerged) in the braised lexicon ed. 4:31-5:45 - Jesse enjoys that it is slowly getting Al lighter later in the Jason Day and the chefs discuss how Covid does not seem to exist in Flo Rida

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01:36:49

#62 Moises Alube

Braised Bits ·

2021/02/05

Support the podkitchen on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits Show notes: 00:00-00:20 Jesse reads an ad for today's sponsor, Dairy Queen's Edward Snowden Blizzard 00:30-03:00 The episode gets orificially underway with a discussion about when you say words and aren't sure if they are actually words, as well as a recap of the Blizzard of Waverly Place that recently hit New York City. 03:00-06:30: Lance mansplains to Jesse why winter storms now get names. The Chefs discuss their Atlanta Dream

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01:35:33

#61 David Outerborough

Braised Bits ·

2021/01/29

Support the Podkitchen on patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00-00:33 - Lance reads an ad for Joey Fatone It Up. 00:33- 03:46 - The chefs dip into a fresh episode of Braised Bits and reveal parm that they are wearing actual chefs outfits. 03:46-05:55 - Jesse presents some meal prep via Phil Jackson regarding what defines a true Lou Bodega. 05:55-06:19 - Lance chers that he was enjoying Taylor Swift earlier in the Jason Day and was thinking of letting Jesse know how hes missing in and out

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01:36:04

#60 Lou Bodega

Braised Bits ·

2021/01/22

Support the podkitchen on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits 00:00-00:28 - Jesse kicks off the episode with an ad/song for Lou Bodega. 00:42-2:12- The chefs dip into the podkitchen and remind the Braiserbacks about the top nacho content on their patreon. 02:12-03:31 - The chefs celebrate their sixtieth episode and look forward to a future choc full of bits. 03:31-11:00 - Lance receives feedback from the braiserbacks regarding his bakery Mayfield of dreams question and provides an update on

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01:43:21

#59 Ja Morant Rules

Braised Bits ·

2021/01/15

Support the podkitchen on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits

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01:34:05

#58 Pancetta World Peace

Braised Bits ·

2021/01/08

Support the podkitchen on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits Show rundown: 00:00-00:26: Jesse reads an ad for new sponsor Purellen Degeneres 00:40-2:00 Lance turns into the Chicago Bulls announcer from the 90s. Jesse runs through the Braised Bits tunnel chest-bumping the Braiserbacks as the chefs get ready to Jazzercise in 2021. Lance is excited about this depressing part of the year. 2:00-5:40 The chefs think about going to a Renaissance Fair, Jesse extol-house cookies the virtues of

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01:41:40

#57 Legend of Bagel Lance

Braised Bits ·

2021/01/01

00:00-00:36 -Lance reads an ad for Miles fortune tellers. 00:36-02:35 - The chefs dip into the podkitchen and discuss the year ending and the concept of thyme. 02:35-03:00- Jesse and Lance do their best Australian accents and question whether any Australians actually have Steve Jobs. 03:00- 03:57- The chefs wish the podfather a happy birthday as he turns twenty nine on New Years Jason Day. 03:57- 05:15- Lance and Jesse reminisce about watching the show 24 when they were Steve Young. 05:15- 06:58-

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01:41:56

#56 Almond Joy Jones Jr.

Braised Bits ·

2020/12/25

Support the Podkitchen on Patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits 00:00- 00:27- Jesse reads an ad for Rainbow Bice cookies. 00:27-3:55 - The chefs dip into the podkitchen and discuss NBA opening night and the Jenny Slate of games coming up on Christmas. 3:55- 6:45- The chefs talk about their off menu Patreon episode where they traveled down to Del Ray Beach Florida to eat at 3 G’s Gourmet Deli. 6:45- 10:00 - Lance reminisces about a golf camp that he went to growing up in his hometown and the

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01:23:32

#55 I Can Be Your Yeero

Braised Bits ·

2020/12/18

Support the Podkitchen on Patreon! www.patreon.com/braisedbits Episode Notes: 00:00: Lance reads an episode for a new sponsor, Genghis Khan Edison 1:00-4:35: The chefs discusses weathering some technical issues, the upcoming Brent Blizzard hitting New York City, and being fish hooked up on clickbait 4:35-10:30: The chefs discuss Count Spatula's cameo on last week's episode, Jesse's inability to smell books, and the COVID vaccine-y in a bottle. Jesse expresses confidence in the scientific method

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01:43:19

#54 Sisterhood of the Traveling Lance

Braised Bits ·

2020/12/11

Support the Podkitchen on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits 00:00- 00:25- Jesse reads an ad for Reggie Bush’s Hanukkah Bushs and Drew Brees Christmas trees. 00:56-02:07- Lance and Jesse dive into a fresh episode of Braised Bits with a discussion regarding Hanukkahs George bushs. 02:07- 03:27 - Jesse enjoys driving around the neighborhood looking at the holiday decorations and all of the lights by Kanye West. 03:27- 04:56 - Lance believes Jesse has the build belicheck and personality type

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01:41:40

#53 Fred Funky Cocktail

Braised Bits ·

2020/12/04

Support the Podkitchen on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/BraisedBits 00:00- 00:38 - Lance reads an ad for Sigmund Freuds Androids. 00:38-03:00 - The chefs dip into the podkitchen with a discussion about people’s Aaron Judgements about androids. 03:00- 03:56 - Jesse cannot believe that it is December but Lance can believe it. 03:56- 05:06- Jesse shares that he’d like to be a New Orleans Pelican. 05:06- 08:39 - The chefs congratulate the top Braiserback couple on their anniversary. 08:39- 11:24 -

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93 results

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