The Nuance Diaries

23:26

If ICE takes me

The Nuance Diaries ·

2026/01/30

I want to tell you a story. It is 2018, and I am a recent college graduate.I’m 23 years old. My high school best friend and I decide to take a little trip to Montreal. We’ve never been. It seems like a really fun idea. She knows French. It felt like a cool thing to do. And we’re in New York City, so it’s a short flight.We get on the plane early in the morning. It’s a very full flight. Boarding was hectic. I remember it being really hard to get our overhead storage and throw things in. Whatever, it

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5:47

I have something completely new to share

The Nuance Diaries ·

2026/01/22

I’m so ‘scited*. I’m ‘scited to share this new thing I made.*Scared and excited, as Glennon Doyle would say.More excited than scared, though.When I thought about posting on Instagram, threads, and even TikTok, I felt more scared than excited.And so, I’ve decided to share this with you, and only you, first.What is this? What’s she sharing?Cards. Custom, handcrafted cards. Created by me, with new oil pastels, and an old Emily Brontë quote (Head to substack to see them!) At first, I thought that this

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3:36

what if the wind was a knife?

The Nuance Diaries ·

2026/01/15

What if the wind was a knife?Swooshing aroundSlicing invisible cutsInside you, right through youEverydayWhat appears to bea breeze to everyone elseis lethal for you Thousands of invisible cutsCountless invisible cuts No one can understandThey ask, “What’s the matter?”Because they can’t see you bleeding That same wind that circles you like a hitmanTransforms into a calming breeze in others’ presence It’s like waking up to the barrel of a gunWith heavy invisible bullets that never leave a

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15:00

An Excursion of Truth

The Nuance Diaries ·

2026/01/07

Click to Subscribe + Read The Full Post Here Hi everybody. Happy New Year.I can tell 2026 is going to be the best year ever because nothing objectively horrible and unimaginably awful has happened yet. It’s all been sunshine and rainbows everywhere.I, for one, am bringing a squeaky clean slate into the new year. New year, new me. 2025 Alexa? Never heard of her. I want to be unrecognizable.The sky is also green. And I’ve decided I don’t like Wicked anymore. And I actually don’t think Jonathan Bailey

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3:28

An Ode to Autumn on The Winter Solstice

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/12/22

Check out this post inside the https://thenuancediaries.substack.com for further reading and listening! The days are getting shorterThe nights are growing long.The birds will be migratingTaking with them all their songsThe air is crisp and chillyWe’re trading shorts for scarves‘Tis autumn, ‘tis autumn, ‘tis autumn.The leaves are changing colorLook at their vibrant huesThe tree branches will be bareBut they’ll bloom again, tooGrab a jacket, dear, it’s chillyThe wind is blowing through‘Tis autumn,

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16:12

The “Wise Beyond Her Years” to “You’re Amazing” Pipeline

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/12/17

“I’m tired of being amazing. I don’t want to be amazing anymore.”The single sentence becomes the crux of the show and of modern motherhood. Jenny Kaminski (Dakota Fanning), a hardworking publishing executive, meets Marissa when they’re hiding out in the bathroom at a school event. The two forge a friendship over twinning in the same dress and dealing with the same dilemma. They are tired of the platitudes their husbands serve them, of doing it all at home and at work, and being told they can have it

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7:42

Kind Eyes on the Lower East Side

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/12/08

I saw a stranger with really kind eyes a few months ago on the Lower East Side.This man with kind eyes looked like he was in love with this girl.I thought to myself, Will anyone like that ever fall in love with me? Would they love me if they knew who I was? What I’d been through? The dark shit clogged inside me? I realized a year or so ago that whenever I pictured my future self, she looked different from how I do now. She had straight long hair, and always looked more together than me. I’ve been

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11:55

Why I'm Not Putting Up My Gigantic Christmas Tree

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/12/04

The basic answer? I don’t want to.If someone wheeled a beautifully decorated tree into my house, I wouldn’t turn them away.If I woke up to a perfectly decorated Hallmark movie-style house in Vermont, I’d be delighted (and also a little terrified that I’d been robbed/kidnapped.) But because life is not a holiday movie, the job of decorator/mover/organizer falls to me. And this year, I’m putting in my notice.I really do historically love the holidays. I love cheesy Christmas movies, gorgeous,

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9:51

My Inner Critic is An Angry Sports Fan

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/12/01

Important housekeeping update over here about paid vs. free subscriptions! I sometimes look in the mirror and think, “Weren’t you supposed to make something of your life by now?”It might sound mean — but it’s one of my tamer negative thoughts.I try to think of all the things I’ve accomplished and the friends I love, who I know love me back.It’s not that I’m not grateful — there’s just this boulder in my path that I keep coming up against again and again and again. And I can’t quite figure out what

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7:59

Why do I love this place that’s never loved me?

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/11/21

I thought I was going to wrap up the “The Best Showgirls are a Wicked Kind of Wonderful” series this week, but after seeing Wicked For Good last night —- that’s not where I am mentally; I want to reflect on this iconic film in a different way. (I will finish that series soon though, don’t worry!)Below is a thread that I posted (on threads, where I’m posting more commentary) before passing out on my couch last night. I woke up to thousands of likes and reposts and shares and replies. I’m so grateful

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11:00

How Did We Forget That Famous People Are Human?

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/11/14

I hate this part of internet culture where something happens and we all immediately want to comment on it and give our hot takes. And I especially hate how quick society is to make light of something very scary and serious just because it happened to a celebrity.I also hate how righteous people can be - as if having a keyboard gives us the right to say what kind of behavior is okay and not okay.I will say, though (at the risk of sounding righteous), that it’s deeply unsettling to be seeing memes

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17:48

What Mamdani's Victory Means to This Native New Yorker

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/11/05

Welcome back to The Nuance Diaries! I write what sensitive, deeply feeling people are thinking but don’t say. AKA the stuff you usually save for the group chat.Free subscribers receive occasional free posts, and paid subscribers ($7/month) receive at least 1-2 essays a week + access to The Authenticity Library + my full archive of 150+ posts.I spent yesterday, November 4th 2025, desperately trying to keep my anxiety at bay.I turned the oven on and forgot to put my dinner in. On the subway, I very

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1:05

The Waves are Calling

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/10/30

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit thenuancediaries.substack.comI wrote this song before and after one of the worst anxiety attacks of my life. The first verse or so came to me on the F train, coming home from Gowanus, Brooklyn. And then the rest came to me very quickly, almost 24 hours later, when I was back in my body.It was the first time that I had really, really intense physical anxiety that wasn’t accompanied by depression. They are the best of friends, depression

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15:17

The Least Problematic Woman In The World Inspired My...

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/10/16

Dylan Mulvaney didn’t change her name when she transitioned — but her one-woman show inspired me to change mine. The name of my newsletter, that is.Dylan briefly discusses nuance at the end of her iconic one-woman show, The Least Problematic Woman in the World. Something about hearing that word, in the context she presented it in felt like a lightbulb moment.I was like, ‘Oh, right, nuance. This very nuanced world we’re living in.”I really can’t tell you how I jumped from that thought to, “I should

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0:35

Salt Air

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/10/14

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit thenuancediaries.substack.comIf you’re new here, welcome! Here inside the nuance diaries (formerly Wild Cozy Free), I write the things that highly observant, deeply feeling people are thinking, but rarely say aloud. Writing is how I attempt to make sense of this sharp, messy, imperfect, wild world.Paid subscribers ($7/month) get at least one essay each week + access to my archive of 140+ posts and podcasts + other fun perks, while free

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16:32

The Best Showgirls are a Wicked Kind of Wonderful pt. 1

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/10/10

If you’re new here, welcome! Here inside the nuance diaries (formerly Wild Cozy Free), I write the things that highly observant, deeply feeling people are thinking, but rarely say aloud. Writing is how I attempt to make sense of this sharp, messy, imperfect, wild world.Paid subscribers ($7/month) get at least one essay each week + access to my archive of 140+ posts and podcasts + other fun perks, while free subscribers get an occasional free essay (like today’s!) and previews of paid ones (like

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14:16

The Surprising Reason I Love Bushwhacking

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/10/07

People are often taken aback when I talk about my time at The Mountain School. I don’t really blame them; if I met me, I would probably be surprised that I’d spent four months on a farm in Vermont when I was 16, too.But I did. And I loved it.I loved seeing the stars at night. I loved the community that my semester formed. I even grew to love the animals that horrified me at first. (I still don’t get too close to cows, goats, or chickens. I give them their space - we respect each other.) I found out

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11:59

Taylor Swift Isn't Going to Save the World

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/09/30

The swiftie in me kind of died writing that. But it’s true. She can’t. To be clear, Taylor has saved my world many times over. I vividly remember hearing ‘Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind’ in my childhood/teenage bedroom, and being forever changed.And yet, as powerful as Taylor’s music has been for me, she alone cannot save the world, and we have to stop acting like it.We have to stop acting like Taylor could end wars and genocides with social media posts, rallies,

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11:46

Storybook Undone: Behind the Lyrics

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/09/24

I wrote the song Storybook Undone almost exactly two years ago after signing a copy of the Best Women’s Stage Monologues of 2022, an anthology in which I’m featured.Here in this book you will find 70 very diverse monologues written for women. These pieces present great acting challenges, and actors will have the pleasure of sinking their teeth into this sublime material while continuing to perfect their craft in their online or in-person workshops. The monologues all come from plays. Read these

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6:44

Please Stay, Please Stay, Please Stay

The Nuance Diaries ·

2025/09/10

I am *not* a licensed mental health professional.RESOURCES available at AFSP and 988 and NAMI and one of my favorite resources for Black women and non-binary individuals, The Loveland Foundation. (These are also copied again at the end of the post.)Today is suicide prevention day. As I sit here writing this, it’s the night before. I had no idea that today was the exact day, as I was writing all this- truly. Eerie.I was going to publish this another time, but now I feel like it has to be today.I

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