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PODCAST

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous Real-Life Stories

"Jeremy Hanson & Dan Baker | Morning Crankers Hosts"

Morning Crankers: Your Ultimate Global Comedy News Podcast for Unfiltered Laughs!"Disclaimer all music and sound FX used in this podcast is owned by Morning Crankers and licensed through Epidemic sound! Wake Up & Laugh with Morning Crankers! 😂 Tired of boring headlines? Morning Crankers is your ultimate GLOBAL comedy news source for unfiltered laughs, real news, and the most outrageous stories happening across the planet. Join your hilarious hosts Jeremy Hanson ("Hans") and Dan Baker

comedy entertainment news

All Episodes

28:17

"Parrots, Pyros, and 464 Pounds of Trouble | Morning...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/29

On today's episode of Morning Crankers, chaos reigns supreme! We kick off with a rundown of today's National Days before diving headfirst into some of the most absurdly hilarious news you won't believe is real. First up, the "Dirty Diddler" shocks the courtroom by turning down a plea deal. Then we flap into the insane case of a woman convicted of killing her husband — thanks to a parrot’s testimony! We also talk about a man who torches his mother's house over money (hint: it’s not for bills), and

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3:10

Dead Broke Blues – A Morning Crankers Comedy Classic

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/28

You’ve got 37 cents, a busted flip-flop, and a wallet full of expired coupons—but at least you’ve got a soundtrack! Dead Broke Blues is the ultimate comedy anthem for anyone who's ever played hide-and-seek with their checking account. Brought to you by the hilarious minds of Morning Crankers, this original song turns financial despair into full-blown parody gold. With honky-tonk twang, cartoon chaos, and more sad laughs than a tax refund spent on gas, this tune delivers the giggles while your budget

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30:39

"Draft Day Drama, Robot Waiters, and Roasting the NFL...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/28

On today’s episode of Morning Crankers, we serve up a wild platter of news, laughs, and pure chaos! We break down the latest drama surrounding the NFL Draft and give our hilarious take on Shedeur Sanders facing some serious heat at the NFL roast. We also dive underground — literally — as we explore the secretive world of a Colorado Springs underground club that's making headlines. In more bizarre news, a Milwaukee judge finds himself behind bars (for real), a priceless piece of abstract artwork gets

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25:04

Made in CHINA, Paid in Blood – A Morning Crankers...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/25

Get your satirical shades on—Morning Crankers just dropped their most unapologetically hilarious original song yet: Made in CHINA, Paid in Blood. This punchy parody track tears into consumer culture, global trade irony, and the glorious absurdity of buying cheap while paying the moral premium. With savage lyrics, explosive humor, and Johnny Bravo-level bravado, this tune roasts the modern marketplace while keeping the beat loud and the satire louder. Perfect for anyone who’s ever rolled their eyes

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30:20

"Cheese Heists, Naughty Nuns & Ozark Shenanigans –...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/25

It’s a full-on Crankers Friday, and this episode is melting like a stolen block of cheddar! We dive headfirst into the mystery of $400,000 worth of cheese vanishing from Neal's Dairy (yes, cheese crime is real). Then things get spicy as we uncover the tale of Joan of Leeds—a medieval nun who said "no more nun for me" and faked her death to go chase a little... fun. In other insane headlines: a live hand grenade is found inside a chip factory in China (that’s some explosive crunch), and we debate the

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2:58

pring Time LOVE – A Morning Crankers Scent-sational...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/24

Love is in the air... and so is the scent of questionable cologne and wild Ozark flowers! Spring Time LOVE is the newest original comedy storytelling song from Morning Crankers, bringing you a skunky spin on spring romance. This toe-tapping tale follows a hopelessly romantic skunk and his sassy woodland crush in a Pepe Le Pew-style pursuit through the backwoods. It’s awkward, it’s adorable, it’s pheromone-filled mayhem! Packed with flirty lyrics, cartoon chaos, and that unmistakable Crankers humor,

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3:04

Can I Hold You Again? – A Morning Crankers Comedy Ballad

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/24

Pour one out for your broken heart and belly laugh with Can I Hold You Again?, a teary-eyed yet side-splitting comedy song from the lovable lunatics at Morning Crankers. It’s the anthem for every soft-hearted romantic who's ever ugly-cried to a breakup text, sent that late-night “u up?” message, or tried cuddling a body pillow with a name. Dripping with fake sincerity and real hilarity, this track hilariously flips heartbreak on its head with parody lyrics, dramatic vocals, and all the cringe of

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3:56

Love is a Dumpsterfire – A Morning Crankers Original...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/24

Get ready to fan the flames of chaos with Love is a Dumpsterfire, the latest unhinged anthem from Morning Crankers! This original comedy song hilariously dives into the flaming wreckage of modern relationships—awkward dates, explosive texts, and emotional meltdowns included. It's raw, ridiculous, and weirdly relatable. If you’ve ever loved, lost, or simply watched someone else's relationship combust like a fast food bag on fire in a back alley, this track is for you. Set your earbuds ablaze and

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31:26

"Real Men Don’t Exfoliate: The Heist of Manhood &...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/24

On today’s Morning Crankers, we unleash our brand-new comedic banger “Real Men Don’t Exfoliate: The Heist of Manhood”—a testosterone-fueled anthem for the gritty, the grimy, and the gloriously un-groomed. We break down April 24th’s National Days (spoiler: still no “National Bacon-Wrapped Chainsaw Day”), celebrate Missouri leading the charge in nuclear energy (BOOM, baby!), and explore groundbreaking feline science—do cats' buttholes actually touch the furniture when they sit? The answer may scar

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22:13

"Aliens, Chupacabras & Snickers Coffins – Hump Day...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/23

Welcome to the Morning Crankers Comedy Podcast—where news meets nonsense and Hump Day hits harder than a chupacabra on your deck! In today’s wild ride: 🛸 We dig into a declassified CIA document on remote viewing—yes, the government actually tried Jedi mind tricks.🇷🇺 Then it's off to Russia, where a KGB doc claims aliens turned soldiers into stone. Medusa? E.T.? We’ve got thoughts.🦌 A deer wanders into a YMCA in Kentucky, probably just looking for yoga and a protein shake.⚰️ A man is laid to rest

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31:16

"Pee Science, Snakeheads, and 1955 Wife Tips –...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/22

Buckle up and brace yourself for a wildly hilarious ride on Morning Crankers, where today’s show dives headfirst into the absurd, the scientific, and the downright retro-ridiculous. We kick things off by honoring the April 22nd National Days (some of them will blow your mind), then reel in a whopper of a story about invasive snakehead fish spotted in Missouri waters—yep, the ones that can breathe air and walk on land like creepy little swamp zombies. But wait—there’s more! We dig up a 1955 magazine

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33:27

🎙️Morning Crankers – Monday Madness: Celebs Say the...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/21

Buckle up, buttercup, because this Morning Crankers Monday is a rollercoaster of ridiculousness and revelation! We’re serving up a full plate of chaos with the dumbest celebrity quotes ever uttered—from “is the moon part of the Earth?” to “I don’t believe in mirrors”—yes, these are real. Then, it’s time for a patriotism-powered twist as Toyota announces plans to manufacture the Rav4 in the USA (finally!). We brush up on the best electric toothbrushes—because your gums deserve greatness.Plus, The

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35:17

“Reincarnated Toddlers, Beach Trash, and the Sperm...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/18

Strap in, folks—this episode of Morning Crankers is a wild one! We kick things off with the National Days of April 18th (because apparently, every day needs a holiday). Then it gets real strange, real fast: a 3-year-old claims he's been reincarnated, correctly identifies a village, his past home, his killer, the body location, AND the murder weapon. Someone get this kid a Netflix deal. We dive into the grossest beach cleanup story from New Jersey—spoiler alert: you’ll never look at the ocean the

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27:31

🎙️ Crankers Throwback Showdown: “Who Said That?”...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/17

In this nostalgic and nutty episode of Morning Crankers, we crank it back to the golden days with our hilarious new segment “80s/90s Who Said That?” — can you guess which icon dropped the quote? From sitcoms to action flicks, it’s a blast from the past with a Cranker twist! Then we hit another level of stupid with some jaw-dropping headlines, including a Kentucky restaurant doing something so bizarre it might actually be genius. 💡🍽️ We also take a spin through politics as Kamala Harris announces

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35:56

Morning Crankers Hump Day Harmonies: “Sent to China”...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/16

On the April 16, 2025 episode of Morning Crankers, we’re back with another wild Hump Day Harmonies banger—this time it’s our brand new comedy song “Sent to China” roasting taxes, bureaucracy, and everything that mysteriously vanishes after we pay Uncle Sam. 💸🇨🇳 We also dig into today's National Days (spoiler: there's some weird ones), and we go full Cranker-mode on Tax Day frustrations that have the average American fuming. You’re not alone—anger is in the air and wallets are empty! 😡💵 Then we

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29:34

Toilet Eggs, KFC Toothpaste & the Minecraft Movie...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/15

Buckle up for another chaotic ride through comedy and curiosity with Morning Crankers! On this April 15th edition, we celebrate some of the weirdest National Days you’ve never heard of—because who doesn't want an excuse to eat weird snacks and blame it on the calendar? 😎📆 We’re talking about KFC-flavored toothpaste (yup, you read that right), a woman who proudly dyes her Easter eggs in the toilet, and a nasty new outbreak: ringworm from trying on clothes. We also dig into the surprising success of

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32:25

Poop in Space, Joggers with Glocks & the Bulgarian...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/14

It’s a cosmic comedy collision on this episode of Morning Crankers! 💥 We’re launching headfirst into absurdity—starting with NASA’s $3 million quest for a better way to squish space poop 🚀💩. Then we flip into Conspiracy Crackdown where we ask the BIG question: Is there life after death... or just overdue taxes? We talk about the tragic story of a former LSU wide receiver, the Menendez brothers’ courtroom twist, and a bizarre tale involving a Bulgarian football team that feels like it was written

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46:13

Morning Crankers: Monkey Trades, Torpedo Bats &...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/11

Hold onto your coffee, folks—this episode of Morning Crankers is an all-you-can-eat buffet of bizarre headlines, hot grill recipes, and hilarious history! We kick things off with a mouthwatering spin on potato skins—Spinach Artichoke Potato Skins—perfect for your Weber grill cookout. Then we spiral into the strange as we uncover the story of a woman who tried to trade her foster child for a monkey (no, really). In our fan-favorite Crankers Drunk History segment, we uncork the French-Mexican Pastry

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28:45

"Crankers Bad Bosses – Toxic Leaders, Comedy Rants &...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/10

It’s Thursday, and Morning Crankers is serving up another hot pot of comedy, chaos, and questionable wisdom! On the 4/10/25 episode, we launched a brand-new segment: Crankers Bad Bosses—where we exposed the worst of the worst in workplace leadership. From micromanaging maniacs to passive-aggressive post-it leavers, we told the stories, cracked the jokes, and gave you the therapy you didn’t know you needed. 💼 Ever worked for a boss who scheduled meetings just to feel powerful? We got you.🤣

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33:31

Love Is a Dumpster Fire – Hump Day Harmonies, Dire...

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous... ·

2025/04/09

Get ready for a wild ride on this week’s Morning Crankers Hump Day Show (4/9/25)! We kicked things off with our fan-favorite segment Hump Day Harmonies, featuring the ridiculously relatable original hit “Love is a Dumpster Fire”—because nothing says midweek like emotional chaos with a beat! But that’s just the start...🐺 Scientists are actually cloning dire wolves now—yes, the Game of Thrones kind (minus the CGI)!🎬 Left-wing film legend Oliver Stone surprises everyone by agreeing with Trump on a

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