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PODCAST

The Dysregulated Podcast

Elliot Thomas Waters

Follow my journey through the chaos of mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is at the heart of this podcast — every episode told through my own lens, with raw honesty and zero filter.This is a genuine and vulnerable account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future.

health & fitness mental health

All Episodes

26:49

My Therapy Reflections #10 - Fire and Fury

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/07/04

Send Me a Message! In this episode of My Therapy Reflections, I explore my latest psychology session, which admittedly wasn’t particularly productive. With my mind in overdrive from lack of sleep, stimulant dependency, and sheer frustration at life, I spent most of the session ranting—about how I’m not getting the help I need, how my life feels worthless, how all the suffering and sacrifice hasn’t led to the happiness I thought it would. I leaned hard into that old belief that there are winn...

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26:25

Fortnightly Check-In #47 - Perfectionism and Frustration

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/06/24

Send Me a Message! I've been working on a deeply personal episode about retroactive jealousy, but my inner critic has been relentless in sabotaging my attempts to record it. This is going to be my most revealing episode yet, explaining how retroactive jealousy has been my borderline personality disorder's "weapon of choice" throughout my life. But as I explain in this episode, my mind is stopping me from getting on with the job! I also take a brief look at the current NSW mental health syste...

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29:55

Bringing The Noise: Becoming The Squeaky Wheel

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/06/20

Send Me a Message! In this episode, I share my ongoing battle to getting help from the mental health system in reducing my medication load. And progress continues to be hard to come by. I share the latest letters my GP has sent off to Bloomfield Hospital and ISMHU, pleading for an inpatient stay to safely reduce and taper off my psych meds. I open up about the financial barriers to private care, the paradox of needing to make anxiety-inducing phone calls just to access treatment (for a...

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30:05

The Discharge Papers #8 - Breaking Point

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/06/18

Send Me a Message! The Discharge Papers returns — but not all of it is good news. In this episode, I read through my latest discharge papers from the Mater Mental Health Hospital, offering an unfiltered and completely vulnerable look at what actually happens during a psychiatric assessment in an emergency department, during my most acute mental illness battles. • The hospital notes describe me as articulate and intelligent, with strong insight into my mental health • Diagnoses l...

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6:57

The 4AM Wakeup

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/06/13

Send Me a Message! Awake up at 4 AM and recording from my car, I'm sharing some thoughts during a tough winter period where both physical illness and mental health challenges have been colliding. Winter has always been difficult for me, and getting sick complicates many of my energy-dependent coping strategies for managing my mental ill health. Burnout is a tough foe to battle, along with the various disorders that I’m up against. But the fight for peace of mind rages on! — Follow my j...

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8:44

Fortnightly Check-In #46 - Cold and Frozen in Fear

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/06/05

Send Me a Message! Follow my journey through the chaos of mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is at the heart of this podcast — every episode told through my own lens, with raw honesty and zero filter. This is a genuine and vulnerable account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future. Support the show To support the show, CLICK HERE You can follow me on Instagram: @elliot.t.waters

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44:05

DBT Skills: Opposite Action

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/30

Send Me a Message! Opposite action is a powerful DBT skill that helps us override our automatic emotional responses by choosing behaviours that counter what we're feeling. This skill works by strengthening neural connections between our prefrontal cortex and amygdala, physically changing our brain to improve emotional regulation. • Identifying what emotion you're experiencing (anxiety, anger, sadness) • Understanding what your emotion is urging you to do (avoid, lash out, isolate) • Conscio...

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7:05

Mental Health in Limbo: Trying to Force the Issue

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/28

Send Me a Message! Elliot explores the challenges of being stuck in a "mental health holding pattern", while waiting for professional guidance on medication changes. • Recounting a recent visit to Mater Hospital seeking help to reset medication and establish a new baseline • Attempting to reduce Seroquel dosage independently, resulting in disrupted sleep patterns during a week of early starts • Using State of Origin football as a crucial psychological anchor during a difficult period • Expe...

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7:35

Back to the Mater: Searching for Answers

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/22

Send Me a Message! I’m drenched, exhausted, and dragging myself through the rain—because I’m about to blow. This is a real-time recording, on my phone, just moments before I walked through the doors of the Mater hospital. Not in crisis, but not far off. I’m tired. Tired of the medication merry-go-round, the constant inner turmoil, the anxiety and depression. Im also tired of my inner critic telling me I’m not “bad enough” to deserve any help. But, I didn’t show up for fun. I didn’t walk from...

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7:50

Fortnightly Check-In #45 - Still Waiting

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/20

Send Me a Message! When silence falls on The Dysregulated Podcast, it usually means something's amiss. Today, I'm breaking that silence with a raw, unfiltered check-in from the front seat of my car at Nobbys Beach during an East Coast Low storm system. Despite feeling spaced-out and fatigued, I needed to let you know: I'm still here, still fighting. The past week has been unlike anything I've experienced before – mood swings cycling every 5-10 seconds, bouncing between slightly depressed an...

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54:50

My Therapy Reflections #9 (Part A) - Befriending My...

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/07

Send Me a Message! In the next chapter of My Therapy Reflections, I share a very significant IFS (Internal Family Systems) breakthrough that has reframed how I view some of my darkest moments. When life feels too loud and too bright (which is most of the time), I tend to mentally retreat, like hiding in a tunnel—a cold, dark place that where I sometimes I can sleep for days. But this session revealed something surprising: my internal parts weren’t trying to trap me there like I had thought. ...

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13:40

Wash Out - Rain and Intense Mood Swings

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/05/01

Send Me a Message! In this episode, Elliot records from inside his car as rain pours down outside, reflecting nicely the turbulence felt within all week. Battling extreme and rapid mood swings that have left him exhausted and overwhelmed, Elliot shares how poor sleep, stimulant medication, grey weather, and sensory sensitivities have compounded to intensify his struggles. As the rain falls mirroring his rapidly dropping mood, he offers listeners a genuine glimpse into the exhausting reality ...

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12:09

Fortnightly Check-In #44 - The Waiting Game

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/04/23

Send Me a Message! Follow my journey living with mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is the driving force of this podcast, and through this lens, my stories are told. This is a raw, honest, and authentic account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future. Support the show To support the show, CLICK HERE You can follow me on Instagram: @elliot.t.waters

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48:41

My Plea for a Medication Reset

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/04/12

Send Me a Message! After years of trying a myriad of psychiatric medications—SSRIs, SNRIs, NDRI's, Tricyclics (TCA), mood stabilisers, antipsychotics, stimulants, benzodiazepines, and everything in between—I’ve reached a breaking point. Nothing has truly worked, my anxiety has never been worse, and the side effects are piling up. My body’s jittery, my mind’s exhausted, and I’m stuck somewhere between sedation and overstimulation. In this episode, I open up about my plea for a full medication...

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10:45

My Journal #6 - The Pressure Builds

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/04/06

Send Me a Message! The next instalment of the "My Journal" series sees me having a look at a very recent entry. So recent in fact it was written just yesterday. Unfortunately the tone of the writing is bleak. I explain how across all facets of my life there is pressure building. Pressure for change, the need to perform, and how anxiety derails every effort that I make. No podcast goes this deep into what it is like living with mental ill health. -- Follow my journey living with m...

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15:49

Fortnightly Check-In #43 - Road Trips, CBD Oil and...

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/04/04

Send Me a Message! I’m back! It’s been a little while between episodes, but in this check-in, I bring you along for the ride—literally. I talk about my recent solo road trip to the Gold Coast (via the very chill detour through Nimbin) to watch my beloved Newcastle Knights take on the Titans. The trip was meant to help me slow down and de-stress... but let’s be real, it didn’t quite go as planned. From battling anxiety on the open road to grappling with post-trip blues (and watching the Knigh...

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13:28

When Anxiety Terrifies Me

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/03/14

Send Me a Message! This week, anxiety hit me in a way that genuinely scared me. Not just the usual panic or dread—but the fear of anxiety itself. When it spirals beyond my control, when I’m bedridden for days, sweating, hiding from the world, and feeling powerless to stop it… that’s when the real bad thoughts creep in. I felt like anxiety could take me down at any moment, and I wouldn’t be able to get back up. But somehow, I crawled out of my anxious den. I went for a run, got a haircut (des...

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21:24

DBT Skills: Pros and Cons

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/02/28

Send Me a Message! Discover Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) with 'The Dysregulated Podcast'! Episode #3: Pros and Cons Support the show To support the show, CLICK HERE You can follow me on Instagram: @elliot.t.waters

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13:36

Fortnightly Check-In #42 - The Battle Against Anxiety...

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/02/26

Send Me a Message! Follow my journey living with mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is the driving force of this podcast, and through this lens, my stories are told. This is a raw, honest, and authentic account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future. Support the show To support the show, CLICK HERE You can follow me on Instagram: @elliot.t.waters

en-au

95:34

My First Kiss: The Spark That Lit My BPD

The Dysregulated Podcast ·

2025/02/15

Send Me a Message! In this episode of The Dysregulated Podcast, I take you back to one of the most pivotal moments of my entire life —my first kiss. But this isn’t just a nostalgic teenage memory; this was the moment that set everything in motion. From high school struggles and crippling self-esteem issues to the deep insecurities that shaped my identity, this night ignited something far bigger than I ever could have realised at the time. Looking back, I can see that this was the spark that ...

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222 results

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