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PODCAST

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere

Gill Sims Jo Middleton

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere is a hilarious podcast from authors, bloggers and great friends, Jo Middleton and Gill Sims. In it, Gill and Jo kick back with a cocktail, or a delicious glass of wine from our partners Laylo, https://drinklaylo.com/, and have a bit of fun discussing random topics including but not limited to, parenting, hormones, menopause, weird nineties sex tips, and relationships. Oh, and we also proffer advice we are in no way qualified to give in our regular problem page slot.

comedy parenting

All Episodes

34:56

Joanna Lumley and Litter Trays

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/08/01

This week we are HOME ALONE! Well, Jo is, Gill relates the tale of her disapointment that her beloved husband decided to stay at home and not go on a work trip. We discuss the joys of ready meals, Jo confesses to some dubious eating habits and Gill explains what an 'empty' is, for the benefit of non-Scottish listeners. We also dwell on the bliss of uninterrupted access to the remote control and no one judging your choices, Jo shares her tips for a visit to Swindon, and Gill reveals why her

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34:56

Joanna Lumley and Litter Trays

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/08/01

This week we are HOME ALONE! Well, Jo is, Gill explains how her beloved husband thwarted her plans by deciding not to go away for work and instead to 'spend time' with her. Jo confesses to some dubious eating habits, and Gill explains what an 'empty' is, for the benefit of any non-Scottish listeners. We also dwell happily on the joys of solitary TV watching, Jo shares her tips for a trip to Swindon, and Gill reveals why her husband refuses to enter the WW2 bomb shelter in her garden (NOT a

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36:26

Cathedral Bells and Combine Harvesters

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/07/25

This week, we're talking Imposter Syndrome, following Jo's minor breakdown after attempting to advise teenagers at a Careers Evening and explain the podcast to them (easier said than done), there is some speculation about several hot vets, and we wonder why imposter syndrome seems to affect women much more than men. Also, Jo's famous nest of pants gets a mention again!

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36:21

Fleeces, Feminism and Fighting.

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/07/19

This week we're talking about Caitlin Moran's newest book 'What About Men?' and her assertations that feminism has 'gone too far' and it is down to women (and more specifically Caitlin Moran) to solve the (very real, often terrible) problems faced by men today. We are unconvinced by any of this, and take some umbrage with many of her statements. Gill conducts some highly scientific research and reflects she may have scarred a man called James for life, and Jo reveals why you should not invite

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43:08

Adult Colouring and K-Holes

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/07/11

This week we are celebrating the little known holiday of National Etch-A-Sketch Day, and talking about all the toys we wished we'd had as children and never got, like the Mr Frostie we both longed for with all our hearts, and of course, the game to end all games- Mousetrap. We also discuss the favourite toys we did have, and ponder with horror some of the toys now available to small children. Jo also shares her early ambitions to be an estate agent, Gill reveals why Shakespeare performances in

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31:22

Robots VS Sheep

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/07/05

This week, Jo and Gill explore the brave new world of AI- alas, some sterling research about it from Jo results mainly in Gill being very confused about what it’s for and saying ‘but I could do that’. Jo enjoys an AI inspired cocktail and Gill decides it is all too much and just talks about farm animals instead!

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35:21

Miracle Gro and Go Carts

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/06/27

This week it is BARGAIN week (what do you mean every week is bargain week on this podcast- rude)! Gill challenges Jo to do a Home Bargains Haul, Jo does not quite enter into it in the spirit Gill had hoped, but she does provide a useful comparison test of Home Bargains mini Echo Falls vs Tesco Garage mini Blossom Hill wines, and we chat about our best bargains over the years, from charity shops to TKMaxx. Then Gill ruins all this wholesome chat at the end by sharing some eye opening new knowledge

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33:44

Bum Bags and Boxed Wine

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/06/20

This week we are talking SUMMER! We have lovely summer drinks, there is some concern about whether or not Gill was naked as we recorded, (spoiler- she most certainly was not, Gill is a professional, who would never podcast with no clothes on), and why men feel the need to remove their tops as soon as the temperature even thinks about creeping up. We also discuss Jo's latest date, which was compromised due to something she refers to as 'bottom mischief' (it's definitely not what you're thinking)

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36:23

Sancerre, Scones and Socks

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/06/15

It's our extra special Guernsey Episode, where Jo and Gill go on a very important work trip that was in no way a jolly and definitely not a holiday! If you missed our Instagram and Facebook Live from Guernsey, or even if you were lucky (!) enough to be party to it, join us to hear about the rest of our trip- from Gill's attempt to drown Jo in treacherous waters, the now famous SconeGate, and tales of sleazy waiters, doubtful attempts at bartering and killer attacks by vicious Franken-Plants.

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42:53

Swiping Right and Shrubberies

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/06/06

It's the AMA Episode (Ask Me Anything) with a selection of questions sent in by you, our lovely listeners! We discuss pretty much everything you can think of, including wedding crashing, alfresco sex, avocadoes, one night stands, fish curry, the legalities of various means of dealing with in-laws, dessicated coconut, and of course, cocktails, dogs and Tinder!

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35:38

Loathing and Lilt

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/05/30

This week we are discussing a topic extremely close to both our hearts- namely grudges and revenge. Jo tells a heart breaking story of victory being snatched from her eager youthful hands in a book quiz, and Gill reveals why there is a boy out there called James who wronged her when they were seven and who she would definitely still punch if she saw him because it is a matter of principles! We also share our top tips for the best possible punishment for those foolish souls who cross us! So don't

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35:07

Russian Spies and Sausage Sellers

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/05/24

This week it is the Hangover Episode, where we finally answer our most frequently asked question, which is of course- what exactly happened in Brighton? We also talk about some of our other most notable drunken moments and painful mornings, and we have some brilliant contributions from all of you too!

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32:42

The Headmaster's Cup and Car-tinis

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/05/16

This week, we attempt to give some helpful advice for any parents who have children going through exams at the moment- however the best advice we can come up with is 'Have a stiff drink', so we quickly move on to discussing our own illustrious (in Jo's case) and less illustrious (poor Gill) results, before Monty Don becomes the hot topic and to Gill's horror, despite harbouring most improper feelings for Monty and his potting shed, Jo reveals she does not even watch Gardener's World! Also, a

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35:18

Fury, Feet and Flatulence.

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/05/10

Welcome to the Rage Episode! This week, we're all about the Meno-Rage, the Road-Rage, and the general Outrage of being middle-aged women who are tired of taking the shit the world throws at us! We also explore a new potential career for Jo, discuss an unexpected menopause side effect, and Gill attempts to give dubious dating advice based on her own very shallow values and lack of moral fibre. We also get a bit too over excited about taking our bad language to a new level for the podcast-

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35:29

Turquoise Gloves and Tiaras

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/05/02

Welcome to our very special (early) Coronation episode! We had high hopes of suggesting wholesome tasteful and patriotric Coronation themed activities, but we spend most the episode wondering if, in fact, our remarks might land us firmly in the Tower for treason. Gill also has to explain to Jo how swans work, Jo's doubtful trouser situation is called into question, and we ponder what it would be like to eat a seagull (but definitely not a swan). We do however come up with a great idea for a

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43:22

Kids or Pets?

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/04/25

This week, to celebrate National Kids and Pets Day, we are comparing our children and our beloved animals, to see which are better. I think you all know the foregone conclusions, but we rate them on topics such as Smells and Cleanliness; Obedience; Cost; Embarassment and Usefulness.

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32:21

The Mental Load

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/04/18

This week, we are having a bit of a chat about the dreaded Mental Load, and why it almost always seems to fall on women? There is some ranting (especially about people who describe fathers as 'babysitting' their own children), there is some science, and there is (obviously) some railing against the Patriarchy (sometimes we wonder if we should have called this podcast 'F*ck the Patriarchy'). If you are feeling overwhelmed, overworked, misunderstood, and a bit alone, hopefully this episode will at

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34:45

TCP and Turtle Wax

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/04/11

Today, we try to have a serious conversation about the various Procedures women are put through and that we put ourselves through, whether these are necessary gynaecological treatments, or frivolous cosmetic fads. We start out being quite sensible, talking about Important Topics like how men and women cope differently with pain, and how too often, women are just expected to put up with discomfort. Jo also decides to share some curious Somerset beauty tips and Gill reveals her unshakeable devotion

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30:35

Chocolate Rims and Creme de Menthe

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/04/04

This week, we're talking about Easter, ahead of this weekend's festivities. At least we're trying to, but it all goes terribly wrong when Jo dramatically reveals she has never read I Capture the Castle, which causes Gill to question their entire friendship, such was her distress. It's all OK though, because we decide to start a cult of our own, and Jo suggests the Ginger Sex God Rick Astley as a suitable deity to worship, to cheer Gill up, because that's the sort of thing that real friends

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39:04

Moral Dilemmas

It"s Five O"Clock Somewhere ·

2023/03/28

This week, we are trying to decide if we are good people or not (OF COURSE WE ARE!) by discussing a series of Moral Dilemmas. We hypothetically muse on whether or not we could ever kill someone, and would we help to bury a body, and we also talk about more realistic dilemmas like telling a friend about a cheating partner, the ethics of eating avocadoes (Gill is very smug because she does not eat avocadoes under any circumstances, but Jo slightly knocks her off her moral high ground by pointing out

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66 results

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