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PODCAST

Intimate Judaism

Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn

Our monthly podcast, INTIMATE JUDAISM, addresses intimacy and healthy sexuality in the context of Jewish family life. We raise conflicts and challenges and candidly offer solutions while remaining firmly within the bounds of Torah and Halacha.

religion & spirituality judaism

All Episodes

31:04

Ancient Love in Modern Times: Celebrating...

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/08/02

The 15th of Av , also known as Tu B’Av, is a minor Jewish festival which in modern day Israel is celebrated as a holiday of romantic love, not unlike Valentine’s Day. In this mini bonus episode, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss the Mishnaic origins of this day, and compare ancient and modern day beliefs about love. To purchase I Am For My Beloved: A Guide To Enhanced Intimacy For Married Couples by Talli Rosenbaum and David Ribner, go to

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31:08

“Date 'Em 'Til You Hate 'Em”: A Visit with Netflix...

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/05/21

Not since Yenta from Fiddler on the Roof has there been a matchmaker as famous as Aleeza Ben Shalom! Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum for a rollicking discussion with the colorful, engaging and entertaining host of “Jewish Matchmaking.”

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50:48

(50) Like Fine Wine: Sex After 50

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/05/02

What happens to the sex life of couples during middle age? Does the familiarity of long-term marriage breed sexual boredom ? Does aging reduce sexual interest? What happens when intimacy is no longer mediated by nidah laws? Listen to Rabbi Scott interview Talli as she presents surprising research findings and insights that will dispel myths about sex in midlife and beyond.

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56:28

(49) Sexual Compatibility, Condom Use, Defining...

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/03/19

In our annual Q&A episode, Talli and Scott answer many questions and discuss numerous issues dealing with Judaism and intimacy, including whether avoiding sex before marriage means a likelihood of being sexually incompatible with your spouse, how to proceed when you start off shomer negiah and then... you're not, finding porn on your husband's intenet history, coping with changes in libido, defining Jewish sex, the halachic attitude towards using a condom, and more. We appreciate your many

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50:06

(48) Is There a Modern Orthodox Shidduch Crisis?

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/02/21

The shidduch crisis refers to the phenomenon in the Orthodox Jewish community whereby eligible single persons, especially women, have difficulty finding a suitable spouse. While there are definite differences between the way dating for marriage is approached and conducted in the Hasidic, Yeshivish and Modern Orthodox worlds, there are also some similarities. Recently, a research study was conducted to better understand and promote awareness regarding the struggles that many Orthodox Jewish

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47:08

(47) Unmarried and Dating in Midlife: Navigating...

Intimate Judaism ·

2023/01/15

Whether divorced, widowed or never married, seeking a new relationship is complex. While each individual has his or her own unique experiences and perspectives, being unpartnered in midlife usually represents mourning for having loved and lost, or not yet having experienced the joy of partnered intimacy. Added to this for Orthodox Jews, are conflicts around non-marital physical touch. Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum in a discussion meant to encourage compassion to self and other, inclusion

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53:03

(46) Want, Will, Should or Must: Is the Sex You Are...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/12/18

Numerous sources in our tradition demonstrate that sex in marriage must be mutual and consensual, and at no time can sex be forced or coerced. However, If a woman has been taught that she must do what her husband wants and she is responsible for protecting him from sin, she will fear the consequences of saying no. In this episode, Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn discuss how non-consensual sexual dynamics can be built in to the system even as normative Jewish law forbids coercive sex. We

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50:11

(45) Navigating Relational and Sexual Intimacy During...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/11/08

Pregnancy and childbirth are profound events in the life of a couple. The physical, psychological and hormonal changes that occur to women during pregnancy and in the postpartum period can impact both partners and affect emotional and sexual intimacy. Couples must learn to adjust to a changed family system and a new identity as parents. Observant Jewish couples are additionally affected by laws that restrict touch during childbirth and in the postpartum period. In this episode, Rabbi Scott Kahn and

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46:14

(44) Infertility and Relationships

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/10/03

Infertility and pregnancy loss affects relationships: with self, God, partner, family, friends and community. In part 2 of this two part series, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum discuss the general implications of infertility and pregnancy loss on these relationships and on marital intimacy and sexuality. Listen to Talli and Rabbi Scott discuss this as well as the specific considerations for observant Jewish couples. Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to get additional episodes,

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41:12

(43) Infertility and Pregnancy Loss (Part One): A...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/09/13

The liturgy we recite on Rosh Hashana includes references to fertility and childbirth. God remembers Sarah, Rachel and Chana by answerIng their prayers for a child. The poem “Hayom harat olam,” the ‘birth day’ of the world, evokes images of pregnancy. For individuals and couples struggling with infertility or pregnancy loss, this can be triggering, painful and isolating. In the first of two episodes on infertility and pregnancy loss, Talli and Scott speak with Dr. Aimee Baron, founder of I Was

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54:43

(42) ‘The Surrendered Wife’ and Marital Intimacy:...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/05/17

Last month, Orthodox Jewish journalist Avital Chizhik-Goldschmidt published an article in The Atlantic highlighting the popularity of Laura Doyle’s 2001 New York Times bestseller, ‘The Surrendered Wife,’ among Orthodox Jewish women. Doyle’s book provides a practical guide to marital bliss and harmony, suggesting that women stop being critical and demanding of their husbands, respect and trust them, and regularly engage in self-care and “be vulnerable.” Many would consider this to be sound

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43:14

(41) Mindfulness, Pleasure and Orgasm: The Jewish...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/04/06

Judaism values sexuality in the framework of marriage, both for the purposes of procreation and for relational intimacy. But does Judaism sanction the enhancement of physical pleasure, or should it be minimized? Do the Sages relate to pleasure differently in men and women, and how aware were they regarding the female experience of desire, arousal and orgasm? Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum as we discuss the “Jewish Pleasure Principle.” Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to get

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49:33

(40) "Male and Female He Created Them": Trans,...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/03/09

According to Jewish sources, God created humans as distinctly male or distinctly female. The roles, obligations and privileges of each gender are clearly defined in our tradition. Yet, not everyone conforms to the gender assigned to them at birth and some individuals experience their gender as distinctly opposite. Can Orthodox individuals who identify as non-binary or transgender find welcoming places, literally and figuratively, in Orthodox society? In this month’s episode, Talli Rosenbaum and

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54:01

(39) Straight FOMO, Hymenal Myths, Vasectomy Envy,...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/02/08

In this month’s episode, we turn the mike over to you, our listeners, and answer a handful of the many questions you have sent in on email, Facebook and Instagram messenger. Listen to Talli Rosenbaum and Rabbi Scott Kahn discuss what happens to queer women who don’t want to miss out on traditional marriage and sexual reproduction, when you are angry at God, when babies destroy your sex life and much more. Join here for the full podcast episode. Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to get

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58:26

(38) Reproductive Health and Halacha Part 2: Birth...

Intimate Judaism ·

2022/01/11

Reproductive health ensures that couples can lead satisfying sex lives, and make informed decisions regarding family planning. Decisions related to birth control methods are generally guided by various factors, including health, convenience, cost, preference, and sexual or other side effects. For most observant Jewish couples, these decisions are also informed by Jewish law. In the second episode of our two-part series on reproductive health and halacha, Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum speak

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48:11

(37) Reproductive Health, Birth Control, and Jewish Law

Intimate Judaism ·

2021/12/07

Reproductive health is relevant to all couples in their childbearing years. Family planning, fertility interventions, and the use of contraception are guided by values and Halachic considerations, and involve several other factors including financial concerns, personal and professional goals, desired family size, and relationship stability. Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum in the first of a two-part series on reproductive health and Halacha. Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to

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59:15

(36) Out of the Closet Without Shame: Balancing...

Intimate Judaism ·

2021/11/09

In past decades, being Orthodox and gay meant suffering in the closet, or choosing to live authentically at the expense of religion. Today, more LGBTQ individuals and couples wish to retain their religious identities while embracing their sexual orientation. Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum in a moving interview with Rachel Weinstein, Shimmy Feintuch and Joshua Brook. Become an Intimate Judaism Patreon subscriber to get additional episodes, merch, and more, including a Q and A dropping this

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51:26

(35) Sex Positivity, Sexual Health, and Sexual...

Intimate Judaism ·

2021/10/11

The World Health Organization defines sexual health as fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and considers sexual pleasure to be a basic human right. In Judaism, sexual pleasure is valued, but only in the context of marital sex, leaving many people in conflict between their sexual health and spiritual health. Join Rabbi Scott Kahn and Talli Rosenbaum as they discuss the six principles of sexual health, and how they conflict with or align with Jewish

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52:24

(34) Men Are Pigs and Women Are Distractions: What...

Intimate Judaism ·

2021/08/31

During the month of Elul, hundreds of high school graduates flock to Israel for their gap year programs, yeshivot, and seminaries. This year offers experiences of high level learning, spiritual growth, increased maturity, new friendships, and fun. But many students experience confusion, particularly around their developing sexuality. The legendary “Night of Tears” refers to the night that some yeshiva boys and seminary girls are encouraged to end their boyfriend/girlfriend relationships for the

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01:03:27

Whose Business is My Unorthodox Life, Anyway? (BONUS...

Intimate Judaism ·

2021/07/26

The Netflix reality show, My Unorthodox Life, has been the talk of much of the Orthodox world since it was released less than two weeks ago. It tells the story of Julia Haart, who first developed a shoe line, and quickly rose in the world of fashion. She now is the the CEO and co-owner of Elite World Group, the world’s largest modeling network. As most of you probably know, the reason that her story is different from others is that Julia was an Orthodox Jew named Talia Hendler living in Monsey. She

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