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PODCAST

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan Carson

Hey Happy Campers! Camp Counselors is a good natured podcast hosted by your favorite fake camp counselors Zachariah and Jonathan. Here at Camp Shady Birch we love the great outdoors in theory, but we’d rather spend our time making friendship bracelets, spreading camper gossip, keeping our heads in the clouds, and avoiding archery. We know we would make great camp counselors minus the fact that we know nothing about camping. So grab your sunscreen and bug spray because things are about to get

comedy

All Episodes

00:36:47

BIG Bathroom Stall Horror - Trail Mix #95

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/08/04

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper who became the most famous girl on campus, for all the wrong reasons, a camper with a nightmare waiting outside the bathroom stall, and a camper who came face to face with an intruder. Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ Bring your A-game and talk to your doctor. Learn more at Apretude.com or call 1-888-240-0340. ➜ Tear. Pour. Live more. Go to LiquidIV.com and use code CAMP at checkout to get 20% off

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00:58:36

145 - I Ate A Chocolate Covered Pickle... Foul.

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/30

LET'S GET PICKLEDDD lol. This week, we are soaking up the brine and reflecting on our recent religious retreat to Picklesburgh! Yes. The pickle festival. We’re talking pickle beer, pickle fudge, and a chocolate-covered abomination that should have someone behind bars. Probably Jonathan lol. It’s tangy. It’s chaotic. It’s everything you never knew you needed to know. LOVE YAThis episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts. Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour! Want

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00:31:46

Stinky Yoga - Trail Mix #94

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/28

IIn this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper torn between a life she loves and a future she didn’t ask for, a Chicken Cutlet Caper, and a tale of a camper causing the most unintentional grand opening sabotage in yoga history. Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour HERE! Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories! Camp Songs: Spotify

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01:18:01

144 - Whoopsie! We Hate It!

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/23

In this episode we are recapping our friends trip, the haunting HGTV show Decorating Cents, Jojo and so much more!This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts. Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour! Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ Download Cash App Today: https://click.cash.app/ui6m/2daxxo2x As a Cash App partner, we may earn a commission when you sign up for a Cash App account. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking

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00:25:59

Major League Episode - Trail Mix #93

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/21

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper who got very passionate during the Passion of the Christ, a camper who got a lap dance on Halloween… and an even bigger surprise six months later, and a camper who had no choice but to flush part of her soul sister. Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour HERE! Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror

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01:03:52

143 - From Cheesy to Queasy

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/16

It's episode 143 campers!!!! i love you, mean it. We are talking about Katy Perry's publicly appointed flop era and her breakup with Orlando Bloom. We also recap our wild and wonderful trip to Asbury Park for our live comedy show. Yes, Jwoww herself showed up, and no, we’re still not over it. Plus: why electric stoves are the enemy, a quick detour into Demi Lovato discourse, and a chaotic pile of other things we just had to get off our chests. Camp is in session. Pack light, fart loud.This episode

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00:32:07

Lost in the Woods at Work - Trail Mix #92

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/14

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper asking the question "am I the asshole? Or is my brother?" Another story about a camper whose coworker got lost in the woods (and things go south quickly), and a camper who learned that one man's trash is another woman's accessory. Get your tickets to see Zachariah Porter's new Live Comedy Tour HERE! Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ Talk it out, with BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first

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01:00:40

142 - I Can Only Assume

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/09

In this episode we unpack a dramatic parking lot rice explosion, a woman who ingested her friend's house keys, and our eternal disdain for Jack Berger. Plus, Jonathan confesses his love for hardware stores, which is somehow... not a bit. It's an emotional rollercoaster of nonsense and neuroses. Just how we like it.This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts. Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ Go to BollAndBranch.com/camp to get 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set

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00:31:31

Bridesmaid Floral Smackdown - Trail Mix #91

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/07

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about Zachariah and a brush with an illness he didn't know about, a wine drunk camper who wrestled a child for flowers, and a steamy shower session that ended up on the bathroom floor.Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ Tear. Pour. Live more. Go to LiquidIV.com and use code CAMP at checkout to get 20% off your first order. ➜ Talk it out, with BetterHelp. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at

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01:02:58

141 - The Fill-My-Hole Initiative

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/07/02

In this episode, a mystery is unraveling itself before our very eyes campers! Who is Marc? Where is Fatima?! Then, we take a road trip (watch out for potholes) to a Pennsylvania town with a surprisingly creative solution to fix their streets. Plus, we've got a 138 year old tortoise who's proving it's never too late to become a dad. And obviously so much more I can't type out because my hands are tired. This episode was mixed and edited by Kevin Betts. Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our

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00:38:15

Red Flag Mormon Wedding - Trail Mix #90

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/30

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper with a dead cell phone on a one-way trip through hell in heels, a camper who is just... like... annoyed, and a camper who brought back more than just wine from Italy. Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror stories! Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist | YouTube Playlist | Sammich's Secret Mixtape Social Media:Camp Counselors

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01:14:48

140 - Leading With Whimsy

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/25

This week at Camp Shady Birch, we’re taking a wild ride... LITERALLY. Counselor Z discovers a log flume for sale on Facebook Marketplace, and baby that’s just the beginning. Not to be dramatic but we suffered the ultimate bait-and-switch from an oil painting seller who yanked the art right out of our hands. We are thrashing out and lashing out in this episode, yall. And little miss U-Haul? She's in the trash. Bill Nye however... is not ;) Let's get WHIMSICAL! (sung to the tune of Physical by Olivia

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00:28:04

I Slept with My Neighbor… Now My Boyfriend Wants to...

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/23

In this mini episode, we are reading listener submitted stories about a camper whose hot-girl-walk became a neighborhood entanglement, a camper who buried their secret under cinder blocks and prayed it would never be found, and a camper who proved lightning sometimes does strike the same place twice.Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! ➜ Go to TropicalSmoothieCafe.com and find a cafe near you. Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip, confessions, and horror

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01:06:06

139 - We Bought A House And Moved Hundreds of Miles...

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/18

Surprise! We bought a house! In this episode, we unpack (emotionally, not physically... we are still avoiding the boxes and Buffy likes to sit on them) the chaotic rollercoaster of home buying. The stress, mama! The Scotch Tape Scam of it all!! Each day, our deep disdain for cheapo house flippers wallows deeper and deeper lol. We also discuss why packing is dreadful and why we’d rather be bald in a suit at a Pitbull concert. Plus, we pay our respects to Mother Ethel Cain. Welcome to our officially

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00:36:04

My Soul Was Left At The Denver Airport - Trail Mix #88

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/16

In this episode, we read listener submitted stories about a hot and talent boyfriend whose friends flaked on him, a sneaky camper who found her fiance's secret box, and a camper who took a flight spiritually, emotionally, (and eventually) literally.Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! ➜ Go to Zocdoc.com/CAMP to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. ➜ Go to TropicalSmoothieCafe.com and find a cafe near you. Check out our website and submit your inquiries for advice, juicy gossip,

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01:04:15

138 - We Are The Content We Consume

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/11

This week, we’re recapping the chaos that is our current media consumption. From buying a tear stick for attention purposes only to analyzing Hollywood plastic surgery. We also dive into the enigma that is Paul Jonas and try to make sense of it all. Then, we take a nostalgic detour behind the scenes of Clueless and wrap it up with a full breakdown of our incredible experience at Beyoncé’s Cowboy Carter concert. Yeehaw and thank you, Queen B.Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ This

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00:36:24

Dental Office Nightmare Employee - Trail Mix #87

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/09

In this episode, we read listener submitted stories about some camper work drama that is truly dental damning, a nurse who had a secret she could not hold onto any more, and a cross country camper whose final stretch of open road quickly turned to freak behavior. Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Topical Smoothie Cafe. ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Better Help. ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Factor. Check out our website and submit

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01:08:56

137 - Fried Clam Fiasco (with Grace O'Malley)

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/04

This week we are joined by comedian, TikTok star, and our hilarious friend Grace O’Malley! Grace spills the tea on her time at acting camp (including a twist she did not see coming). Plus we chat about the Navy boys flooding New York City for Fleet Week, the politics of clam chowder in the Delta Sky Lounge (but never at a concert), and so much more!Get tickets to see Grace O'Malley's Down For Anything Tour Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! Sponsors: ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by

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00:34:37

Pee Mud - Trail Mix #86

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/06/02

In this episode, we read listener submitted stories about a camper falling in love with their straight friend, a girl nearly scalped in her living room, a secret club cover up, and a bonus story about a satanic doll at bible camp. The Book of Annie by Annie Korzen Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON! ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Topical Smoothie Cafe. ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Better Help. ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Factor. Check out our website and submit

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00:59:07

136 - Surviving Coach in 34B (Read To Filth By A...

Camp Counselors with Zachariah Porter and Jonathan... ·

2025/05/28

Want BONUS CONTENT? Join our PATREON!Sponsors: ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Tropical Smoothie Cafe. ➜ This episode is sponsored in-part by Progressive Insurance. Camp Songs: Spotify Playlist YouTube Playlist Sammich's Secret Mixtape Social Media: Camp Counselors TikTok Camp Counselors Instagram Camp Counselors Facebook Camp Counselors Twitter See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at

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