x

75% of people globally want unbiased news (Pew Research) but are concerned they're not getting that.

Get balanced coverage with Symby. See how stories are covered across diverse outlets and spot when one side covers a story the other skips.

PODCAST

The Otis Advisory

Pat Fant aka Uncle Otis

HIGH VELOCITY HOOT from Universal Foolishness: Original News Cartoons as short-form podcasts. Dump you old Think Tank and wade into these guilt-free waters with Tio Otis - finishing off political correctness for a grateful nation. Slower listeners keep right>>>>

comedy entertainment news

All Episodes

00:01:30

HUNTER FOR PRESIDENT

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/08/02

Hunter started out with nothing and still has most of it left. Like when he’d get in trouble for peeing in the pool at the Best Western. "Hunter you get out of there right now. Your daddy’s gonna wear you out when he gets back from Epstein's. I'm telling him what you did in that pool.” Sometimes, what's left of his mind plays tricks on him. Now Hunter thinks he wants to be president to finish raiding the little honey pot Joe left for him over in China. But wait – did you know there’s a Mrs

en

00:01:30

ZOHAN THE CONQUEROR

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/07/25

Say hello to Zohan the Conqueror, the latest fanboy of the lunatic fringe, now running for mayor of New York City. It’s obvious, Zohan only has a beatnik-level view of what makes the world work, but he’s still planning to run this con on YOU and the coalition of the unhappy next election day. He’s the shiny new locomotive pulling the Hate America First Train into Bankruptcy Station. Zohan the Conqueror (as his mamma calls him) is on board for anyone who’s lost their appetite for work. “Chicks dig

en

00:01:29

Courtesy Lights

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/07/09

Any minute now a judge will try to make Trump go get back all the bunker busters he loaded on the plane to Iran, then bring them home and put them right back in the garage where he found ‘em. That’s because Orange man didn’t ask permission first. He didn’t call Sandy Cortez or that really smart one, Ms. Crockett to see if it was OK! Think of it like a Hollywood stop where you just slow roll on by in your B2. Judge will tell Trump to just fly all that stuff home and don’t be doing this again

en

00:01:29

BUNKER BUSTER WITH CHEESE

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/28

There’s a prize waiting for anyone who can finish their Bunker Buster with Cheese and keep it down for 8 seconds - just like the rodeo. The Bunker Buster comes tail up to go down easy at forty-five degrees. And when it hits bottom you'll know it, so have s quick exit planned if things get messy. Wait, what’s that? The Bunker Buster comes with an automatic second helping, built right in. Now what can you do to get ready for your next Bunker Buster? First, get out of the way! Call in sick. Take

en

00:01:29

ALCATRAZ GIFT SHOP

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/25

Orange man wants to reopen the world-famous Alcatraz criminal resort. It’s been rusting and falling down for years, kinda like Sleepy Joe, but Alcatraz can still be restored, Joey probably not. Alcatraz has a special place for people who take their shoes off on airplanes, remove tags from pillows or pull their rotary nose hair clippers out at dinner. Remember Santa doesn’t stop at the county lock up, so do you really think he’s going to Alcatraz? Hell no? Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

00:01:30

Meet the Activist

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/23

Complaining is real popular, and nobody enjoys it more than the activist. Say hello to three-dollar Bill, he’s the new front page of the Donkey Party. When Bill’s not busy at Hamster Fight Club night, he and the other humanized mice like to head downtown for a paid appearance at the local street riot. Bill brings plenty of concrete chunks to hurl at police, and have some left over to share with the other kids so they can go to jail too. That’s America! And if $3 Bill has graffiti skills, well

en

00:01:30

Men Are Back

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/11

When you need a tire changed or a refrigerator moved to the second floor, who do you call? You call a man! Men are back, and are finally done with putting their hair up in mouse ears and going with you to the mall. Don’t be asking men to tell you which sheets they think are the softest. They have no idea – none - and anything they say is just to make you feel better. Men are no longer impressed by things like Kamala's bunions, so quit asking. And if a man brings a bag of Pork Rinds to your

en

00:01:29

Brooklyn Bridge

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/06

The Mexican Navy is looking for a new navigator after somebody over there tried to drive their one hundred fifty-foot-tall boat underneath the one hundred thirty-foot tall Brooklyn Bridge. Not a good look! Pealed the top right off right in front of where congressman lady Sandy Cortez stays, and supposedly gets her laundry done. Hear what came next with Otis. Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

00:01:30

Inside Out

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/06/02

You know that trick where you turn your socks inside out to get another couple of days out of them? Well, that’s what the donkey party bosses have in mind for Kamala. Just turn the lady in the pant suit inside out for another go at the controls, and do it fast before Sandy Cortez de Putanasa gets it all. But what's the difference? Aren’t you tired of complaining yet? I know I am. Imagine how much more we could get done around here if everybody put down the dopey little signs and walking around

en

00:01:30

What Men Want

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/05/30

What Do Men Really Want, aside from the usual stuff like getting to wipe your nose on your sleeve or maybe a good stool softener. Men are simple organisms who still think they can play Wipe Out on the steering wheel. But know other stuff too like what a woman is. Hell, men are experts in that. They know today’s modern girl isn’t looking for any fluff. Fang Fang isn’t up all-night waiting for that box of Christmas pajamas with the bunny feet and tail. It comes down to one thing: “What would Roy

en

00:01:30

Mud Pies in Space

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/05/16

If you've been getting your powdered Margarita mix from China, I think I'd be making other arrangements. Orange man has changed all this so we don’t forget how to make our own essential fixins. We shouldn't have to rely on China for medicine, memory foam and dead flashlights. “But, Oh Uncle Otis, everything’s gone global now!” Well not everything – mudpies is still a local thing - good clean fun that comes right out of the back yard for free. Mud pies exist for one reason: to give you something

en

00:01:29

Steaks in Cages

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/05/12

If you’re even thinking about stuffing a T-bone down your shorts at the Walmart think again. Due to shrinkage (used to be called stealing but that was too real) they’re now keeping the steaks in little wire cages to keep your grubby mitts from stuffing Mr. Roast down your pants and heading for the parking lot. If you’re keeping score, this all started with locking up the deodorant and toothpaste - now it’s on to the Veal of Fortune. Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

00:01:29

Dented Can

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/05/02

It all makes sense when you think of Kamala as the dented can on the store shelf. Poor little dented can, it’s sad that nobody wants it anymore being all smushed and caved in. Pushed aside for the shiny new can, the one with the fresh AOC label, except that one’s about to be banned for all the fake coloring in it. Of course, there is one color you don’t have to worry about. Right, it’s Orange! Nothing phony - Orange is different, and it won’t make you sick. Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

00:01:29

Tanks Alot Kamala

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/05/01

Kamala is about to open the doors to her new Think Tank! “We’ll think about anything for a price,” giggled Kamala. It’s like the self-licking ice cream cone of bad ideas, but there it is anyway. Tanks Alot Kamala is mostly particle board and sounds like a cry for help that no one hears. It even has its own flush handle built right into the tank for when things get messy. Let’s check the ingredients: “May contain bull-corn. Has no wow factor. Could cause white winter itch." So what can you

en

00:01:29

OTIS OPENS YOUR MAIL

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/04/21

Otis gets a lot of prison mail. But when the weather’s nice, he likes to walk around the neighborhood to see what everybody else got in the mail. You can learn a lot about your neighbors by going through their mail. Take this nice lady for example. Dear Ms. Jones, Oh look, it’s from the free clinic. It was fun seeing you again this week - red and irritated - well that’s not going to clear up. Oh here’s a birthday card from somebody named Boom Boom Willie. Probably met down at the community pool

en

00:01:29

Class Clown

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/04/17

Congressman-lady Jasmine Crockett really likes being the only botanical in government. But don’t be fooled by all the flowery words. Jasmine knows nothing pays off faster than class clown when you need to get noticed, before that AOC gets it all. Remember the circus business is nothing new for Jasmine! Throw in a pair of hoop earrings and a couple of media stink bombs and you’ll get ‘em talking. Then just sit back and let the cameras do all the work. This shake down isn’t going to stop anytime

en

00:01:29

Crawfish Are Not Fish

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/04/16

Everybody knows, crawfish are not fish. Never have been. Try putting crawfish in the microwave and you’ll see what I mean. The stuff in there runs out all over the place, gets all over the floor and everything. Meat doesn’t do that. You can do better. Look, a million flies can’t be wrong. Even Greenland doesn’t allow crawfish, wonder why? Ask the medical examiner. They know crawfish are like sticker burs. You’re not dealing with a bag of frozen peas here. Crawfish are pre-historic, and

en

00:01:29

Being Chuck Schumer

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/04/15

The only thing more dangerous than being Chuck Schumer right now is being Chuck Schumer driving a red Tesla. That would be a bowel-curdling trigger event over at Camp TransAntifa, the Nottingham Forrest of the pumps and pearls fellas with an itch for firebombing. I know it’s getting harder to score this stuff. But Orange man doesn’t care. He’s sending Tesla firebombers to the pen for 20 big ones. But don’t write him off yet, Chuck is like cat pee. You’ll never get the smell out. Hear Podcast ~

en

00:01:29

Incinerated Persons

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/03/07

Don’t be looking for a Mother’s Day card in Wisconsin. “Mother’s Day cards don’t say mother anymore,” said Governor Shagnasty. In Wisconsin, Mother has been changed to “Incinerated Persons” – wait, is that right? By the way, now that Orange man has declared English the official language of America, when someone tells you “no worries” – you can just say, “hey speak English!” Otis explains. Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

00:01:29

Over Easy

The Otis Advisory ·

2025/02/27

The barnyard is buzzing this week over the high cost of eggs. Somebody gave the chickens the flu, probably caught it at the gym like everybody else. But what you really need to worry about is egg smuggling. There coming across the border from everywhere, Smuggling eggs can get messy. Stuffing a dozen or so down your shorts to cross “over easy” in El Paso works fine, until you sit down. Otis explains. Hear Podcast ~ Wash Hands

en

285 results

Similar Podcasts

射後不理＃爽就好了

咪咪 & 淳淳

Therapy Gecko

iHeartPodcasts

百靈果 News

Bailingguo News

Old Time Radio Comedy

solgoodmedia.com

The Hard Yarns Podcast

Cameron Branch and Daniel Delby