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PODCAST

Relationship Advice

Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich

Relationship Advice helps listeners uncover the stuck spots in their relationships by taking expert advice from three licensed professional counselors and boiling it down into digestible tips and tools. Colter, Cayla, and Lauren help people to see that the first step to connecting with somebody else is by connecting with you. They focus their show on understanding and navigating the cycles that couples face, how to practice individuation, and staying in an emotionally regulated state. Just them each

health & fitness mental health

All Episodes

54:08

What Our Withdrawer Spouse Can Teach Us

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/27

FREE 10 Day Couples Challenge Check out Relationship Academy! In this episode, we explore what pursuers can learn from withdrawer partners instead of seeing them as the “problem” in the relationship. Withdrawers often bring steadiness, pacing, self-regulation, and a needed reminder that not every issue has to be solved immediately. When pursuers can appreciate these differences, couples can move out of blame and into a more balanced, secure connection. Main Talking Points: Slowing Down

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48:06

How To Treat Trauma

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/25

FREE 10 Day Couples Challenge Check out Relationship Academy! In this episode, we talk about what trauma treatment actually looks like and why healing is not as simple as “telling the story” or getting the memory out of your brain. Trauma is not only stored as information. It is often held in the body, in our nervous system, and in the protective responses we learned in order to survive. Because of this, effective trauma work usually requires more than talking through the details. It requires

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54:05

How To Know If They Are "The One"

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/22

How do you know when someone is truly the person you want to build a life with? In this episode, we talk about the big question so many people ask in dating: How do I know if they’re “the one”? We share how we each knew with our own partners, then walk through the real-life markers that can help you understand the long-term viability of a relationship. In this episode, we explore: Shared values Emotional support Healthy conflict Lifestyle fit Hard conversations

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58:31

How To Stop Jealousy From Sabotaging Your Relationship

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/15

Jealousy and envy can feel shameful, but they often reveal important fears, longings, and unmet needs beneath the surface. In this episode, we explore the difference between jealousy, the fear of losing something we already have, and envy, the pain of wanting something we do not feel like we have. We also talk through how to slow these emotions down, bring them to your partner with vulnerability, and move away from control, criticism, monitoring, or resentment.Main Talking Points: Jealousy

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53:17

Connection vs Safety

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/08

In this episode, we talk about how couples can use simple “scales” to better understand each other’s energy, desire, and capacity. Instead of assuming what your partner means when they seem tired, anxious, disconnected, or resistant, naming where you are can turn confusion into context. These tools help couples move out of all-or-nothing thinking and into clearer, more generous communication.Main talking points: Energy Check-Ins Naming Capacity Getting Context Importance

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50:07

Emotional Regulation and Why It’s Important In...

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/04

Today we are discussing what it really means to regulate. You know that feeling when you are suddenly not quite in control of yourself? Maybe your body gets tense, your thoughts start moving fast, your tone shifts, or you feel like you might say or do something you would not normally say or do. That is often a sign that your nervous system is activated and needs support.In this episode, Cayla, Colter, and Lauren break down what self-regulation actually looks like in real life and why it matters so

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59:21

Anger in Relationships

Relationship Advice ·

2026/06/01

Anger can feel disruptive in relationships, but it often shows up for a reason: it signals that something important feels blocked, unfair, or violated. In this episode, we explore how anger can either push partners into blame, shutdown, and disconnection, or help clarify needs, values, and boundaries when it’s expressed with regulation. The goal isn’t to get rid of anger, but to understand it, lower its intensity, and communicate it in a way that keeps both people connected.Main Talking

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43:29

‘You Can’t Do This’ Is NOT A Boundary

Relationship Advice ·

2026/05/28

If there is one thing to know about boundaries, it is that a boundary is not about what you need somebody else to do. It is about what you are going to do in response to somebody else’s behavior. Colter, Cayla, and Lauren discuss boundaries from a psychotherapeutic lens and give tools for how to better communicate boundaries. Main Talking Points: Our bodies are the indicator for when we need to set boundaries. Boundaries exist on a continuum, not as binary bookends. Communication of

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55:43

Withdrawers: When Keeping the Peace Backfires

Relationship Advice ·

2026/05/25

In this episode, the crew dives into the “withdrawer” role in relationships and how rigid, all-or-nothing responses can quietly create disconnection. They unpack why withdrawers often appease, shut down, or avoid conflict altogether — not because they don’t care, but because disappointing their partner feels intolerable. The conversation explores healthier alternatives to passive or rigid boundaries, including slowing down, using buffer statements, getting curious, and learning how to tolerate

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50:15

Before You Pack: The Conversations Every Couple Needs...

Relationship Advice ·

2026/05/15

Vacation stress usually isn’t about the trip itself — it’s about the unspoken expectations couples bring into it. In this episode, the hosts unpack the conversations that can completely change the tone of a vacation before you ever leave the driveway: money, planning, intimacy, parenting, downtime, technology, and more. They explore how different nervous systems, personalities, and expectations can either create connection or turn a “dream trip” into the same fight in a different location.Main

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50:49

Everything That Comes Before Intimacy with Matthew...

Relationship Advice ·

2026/05/04

What does “true intimacy” actually mean—and why do so many couples feel disconnected even when they love each other? In this episode, we sit down with Matthew Raabsmith and Joanna Raabsmith, relationship experts and co-authors of Building True Intimacy, to unpack the deeper layers of connection most relationships are missing.We dive into their Intimacy Pyramid™ framework—a powerful model that explains why so many relationships struggle at the foundation and how couples can rebuild safety, trust,

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41:01

When To End A Relationship

Relationship Advice ·

2026/04/27

Ending a relationship is rarely about one big moment—it’s usually a pattern that keeps repeating despite effort, conversations, and growing awareness. This episode explores how to tell the difference between normal relationship challenges that can be worked through and deeper signs of incompatibility or emotional disconnection. We talk about what it looks like when one or both partners stop showing up, when the same conflicts keep resurfacing without resolution, and when the relationship begins to

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54:57

Navigating Friendship Conflict & Changing Friendship

Relationship Advice ·

2026/03/20

Friendships change as people grow, and those shifts can bring up grief, confusion, frustration, or fear.In this episode, we unpack how growth, life transitions, shifting values, and changing capacity can create tension in friendships, and why our first instinct is often to fix, judge, withdraw, or take it personally. We talk about how asking better questions, staying open instead of defensive, and making space for both grief and care can help friendships adapt rather than fall apart. The goal is not

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53:34

If I Have To Ask, It Doesn't Count

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/28

Why does it feel so disappointing to ask for what you want? In this episode, we unpack the hidden belief that “if I have to ask, it doesn’t count” — and how that mindset turns simple needs (compliments, celebration, affection) into silent resentment. We explore the shame, fear of failure, childhood triggers, and meaning-making underneath it all — and how shifting from mind-reading to curiosity can completely change the dynamic.Main Talking Points: • Mind-reading myth • Meaning-making traps • Shame

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53:35

Why Everyone Thinks Their Partner Is a Narcissist

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/23

When someone says, “I think my partner is a narcissist,” they’re usually not chasing a diagnosis—they’re trying to make sense of a relationship that feels controlling, confusing, and painful. This episode slows it way down and compares narcissism with insecure attachment patterns (pursuer/withdrawer) and neurodivergence, since the impact can look similar even when the why is totally different. The big differentiator they keep coming back to is flexibility: is there willingness to reflect, learn,

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13:33

Behind Every Criticism There Is A Request: QUICK ADVICE

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/19

Couples Values Construction for 2026⁠⁠Here you can find some more instruction on how to construct your values as a couple as well as the values list. ⁠⁠Get $100 off Spark My Relationship⁠⁠ 14 hours of relationship content Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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51:20

Psychology of the State of the World

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/16

There’s been a wave of major U.S. events stirring up big emotions, and this episode stays out of political commentary to focus on how people psychologically respond—in themselves, in relationships, and online. In this episode, Colter, Cayla, and Lauren unpack how nervous-system activation, bias, privilege/positionality, and “defensive attribution” can shape what we believe, how safe we feel, and how we treat people who respond differently. They also walk through 10 common “archetypes” of coping with

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67:13

The Art of Negotiation with Kwame Christian

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/09

Negotiation isn’t a “business skill” — it’s an everyday relationship skill. Today we sit down TED Talk speaker, best-selling author, and podcast host of Negotiate Anything, Kwame Christian. He is recognized as one of the world's top negotiation experts, and he got good at it by treating tough conversations like a learnable muscle (not a personality trait). He breaks great negotiation down into three core skills—listening, curiosity, and emotion management—and offers a flexible framework

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60:13

Why Your Partner's Body Image Matters More Than You...

Relationship Advice ·

2026/02/02

Body image isn’t just “how you look”—it’s how you feel in your body, and that inner experience can quietly shape conflict, closeness, sex, and day-to-day connection in a relationship. Today, we sit down with Samantha Jerome (registered dietitian nutritionist + certified diabetes educator) reframes “health” as a whole-person process—food, movement, sleep, stress, relationships, creativity—and warns that extreme New Year “reset” mindsets often turn into control, shame, and burnout. The episode

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13:51

State Of The World: QUICK ADVICE

Relationship Advice ·

2026/01/29

Couples Values Construction for 2026⁠⁠Here you can find some more instruction on how to construct your values as a couple as well as the values list. ⁠⁠HOLD ME TIGHT - Workshop Jan 31 and Feb 1, 2026⁠⁠ Join Cayla Bozovich, LPC, EFCT for a jam packed and fun weekend of learning about how to take your relationship back to a 10 ⁠⁠Get $100 off Spark My Relationship⁠⁠ 14 hours of relationship content Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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