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PODCAST

Dear Dr. Tracy

Welcome to Dear Dr. Tracy, the podcast that helps you navigate the everyday challenges of relationships, marriage, and parenting with expert advice and real, relatable conversations. Hosted by clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, this podcast is your place for honest, no-nonsense guidance on love, intimacy, boundaries, and communication. With over 18 years of experience, Dr. Tracy brings a mix of clinical expertise, evidence-based research, and personal insights as a

health & fitness mental health

All Episodes

48:38

How to Handle Your Partner’s Disappointment Without...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/08/14

In this episode of Dear Dr. Tracy, Dr. Tracy and Greg explore a listener’s struggle with saying no to her husband’s request—especially when his disappointment feels “loud and heavy.” During a tense family vacation at his parents’ cottage, she wanted to leave early, but agreed to stay longer to avoid upsetting him—only to end up in tears.They unpack:Why so many people put their own needs aside to keep the peaceHow fear of disappointing a partner can quietly erode connectionThe difference between

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45:16

ICYMI: Defensiveness vs Assertiveness

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/08/07

In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits with her husband, Greg, to unpack the often-misconceived topic of assertive vs defensive communication styles. They answer real questions from the community about what it looks like to champion self-respect and a deeper understanding of your partner by lending practical steps to change the defensive patterns in our relationships and implementing assertive and authentic responses. In this episode, they discuss: Important examples of defensive and

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40:24

When Sexual Desire Feels Mismatched: Emotional vs....

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/07/31

In this episode of Dear Dr. Tracy, we explore one of the most common—and emotionally charged—challenges in long-term relationships: when one partner desires more sex, while the other feels overwhelmed, touched out, or emotionally disconnected. Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, clinical psychologist and couples therapist, breaks down the difference between spontaneous and responsive desire, explains why sex can feel like part of running a marathon for some partners, and unpacks how sex is often a bid for

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51:07

Infidelity Isn’t Entertainment—It’s a Wound: Why...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/07/24

When Coldplay’s Jumbotron "kiss cam" (sidenote, it's not a kiss cam, its the Jumbotron Song) sparked global buzz over an affair, it reminded us of a hard truth—infidelity is not entertainment. In this must-listen episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, clinical psychologist and relationship expert, breaks down the real reasons people cheat, from disconnection and loneliness to conflict avoidance and unmet emotional needs. You’ll learn: Why affairs happen (it’s not always about sex) The truth

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26:54

Is it Boundaries or Avoidance?

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/07/17

People talk about setting boundaries—but what if it’s actually avoidance? In this episode, Dr. Tracy breaks down the difference between real emotional boundaries and the kind that push your partner away. Understand the difference and how you can center yourself in creating healthy communication and a stronger connection in your relationship. Keywords: relationship boundaries, avoidant behavior, communication in relationships, emotional connection, healthy boundaries, conflict in

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32:50

Hot Takes, Hard Truths & the One Thing That Rekindles...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/07/10

In this three-parter, Dr. Tracy shares the real conversations happening in therapy and at home.Part 1: Is telling your child “You’re fine” gaslighting? Dr. Tracy unpacks this hot take and why parenting needs more nuance—not more guilt. Part 2: A listener asks if her husband should confront his mother for trash-talking them on social media. Dr. Tracy explores boundaries, control, and what to do when estrangement gets messy. Plus, her new book cover is finally revealed—preorders are live. Part 3:

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27:14

Why You're Always Explaining Yourself (And What It’s...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/07/03

Why do we over-explain, justify, or get defensive—especially in our closest relationships? In this episode, Clinical Psychologist and Relationship Expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish explores the deeper reasons behind the urge to explain yourself, even when it doesn’t bring clarity or connection.Drawing from her work with clients, Dr. Tracy unpacks how childhood wounds, people-pleasing, and fear of rejection often drive our need to be understood or seen as "right." You’ll learn why this pattern is so

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54:00

Vulnerability, Vacation, and the Mental Load

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/06/26

Planning a summer vacation should bring connection—not conflict. But for many couples, time away becomes a pressure cooker for everything they haven’t talked about: the unequal mental load, unspoken expectations, and simmering resentment.In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, clinical psychologist and couples therapist, is joined by her husband Greg to unpack how to prepare your relationship for vacation. Together, they dive into the emotional and logistical stress of the mental load, how to divide

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49:01

Why Can’t I Change, Even When I Know What’s Wrong?

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/06/19

In this solo episode, Clinical Psychologist and Relationship Expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish explores a common but painful experience in relationships: knowing what your partner needs, wanting to show up differently, and still defaulting to old, self-protective patterns.If you’ve ever said, “I love my partner, but I keep shutting down,” or “I know I’m hurting them, but I don’t know how to stop,” this episode is for you.Dr. Tracy shares a relatable story from her own marriage, explains how nervous

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28:06

Parenting Through Discomfort: Speaking up for our kids

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/06/12

In this solo episode, Dr. Tracy shares a personal story about standing up for her child, navigating hard conversations with other parents, and teaching children how to build trust in friendships. She explores what it means to act on your values, model courage, and help kids make sense of complex social situations.RESOURCES: Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠ Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠ Ready to deepen your

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30:49

Gaslighting, Manipulation & Mislabeled Pain:...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/06/08

What if the words you're using are keeping you stuck? In part two of this conversation, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Morgan explore how to step out of pathologizing language and into deeper emotional responsibility. You’ll walk away with practical tools to create healthier dialogue, rebuild safety, and connect more meaningfully with your partner. Learn more about Dr. Morgan Anderson - https://drmorgancoaching.com/Say hello to her on IG - https://instagram.com/drmorgancoaching RESOURCES: Join the next

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39:04

Gaslighting, Manipulation & Mislabeled Pain:...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/06/05

Is your relationship being hurt by the words you’re using? In this episode, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Morgan, attachment theory expert and psychologist, unpack how terms like “gaslighting,” “narcissist,” and “manipulation” are often misused—and why that misuse is damaging our relationships. Tune in for an honest, expert-led conversation that challenges oversimplified narratives and brings back the nuance we desperately need. Learn more about Dr. Morgan Anderson - https://drmorgancoaching.com/Say hello to

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42:37

The Silent Drift: Why So Many Couples Feel Like...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/29

In this episode, Dr. Tracy unpacks what The Four Seasons on Netflix gets right about long-term love. From emotional distance to growing apart, invisible labor to unspoken resentment, this isn’t just a show—it’s a mirror. And if you're feeling the quiet disconnection in your own relationship, this one's for you.RESOURCES: Join the next More Than Roommates Challenge! ⁠Click here⁠ Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠ Discover your relationship negative cycle with

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38:44

Resentment and the Micro Moments: The Mug Left Beside...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/22

In this episode, Dr. Tracy shares a personal story about a mug left beside the sink—and how something so small can symbolize something much bigger in a relationship. Sitting with her husband, Greg, they explore how resentment builds in everyday moments, especially during busy seasons like summer when couples often shift into "roommate mode."They talk about: How micro-moments can quietly erode connection Why summer often intensifies disconnection The importance of naming resentment

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42:58

Understand Your Inner Parts with Britt Frank

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/15

In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits with therapist and author Britt Frank to explore her new book Align Your Mind—a guide to understanding the inner conflicts that leave us feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or out of sync with ourselves. They talk about the power of "parts work"—the idea that we all carry different inner parts with competing needs and beliefs—and how learning to listen to these parts can transform our mental health, relationships, and self-trust.Listen in and discover:What “parts work”

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50:44

When a Bad Apology Isn't Enough

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/08

We’ve all heard it: “I said I’m sorry, what more do you want?”In today’s episode, Dr. Tracy and Greg unpack why so many apologies miss the mark — and what you can do when you’re left feeling unseen, dismissed, or even more hurt after hearing “sorry.” Together, they explore why bad apologies happen (hint: it’s not always malicious), the emotional cost of apology fatigue, and the scripts you can use to move from surface-level repair to real reconnection. If you've ever felt stuck in a cycle of

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18:51

5 Small Shifts That Build Real Connection

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/04

Emotional connection isn’t built by grand gestures—it’s created in the quiet, everyday moments between you and your partner. In this episode, Dr. Tracy shares 5 practical ways you can actually build connection with your partner, especially when things feel distant. Whether you’re stuck in the roommate phase or craving more closeness, these simple shifts can bring you back to each other—one intentional moment at a time. Learn more with Matthew Fray ⁠here⁠. ⁠Listen to our previous episode on

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52:27

Breaking the Myth of “Happy Wife, Happy Life”

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/05/01

We’re breaking down the myth of “happy wife, happy life” and why it’s quietly harming relationships. Dr. Tracy and relationship coach Matthew Fray explore how focusing only on your partner’s happiness can lead to resentment, disconnection, and the slow breakdown of intimacy. Learn why sharing your inner world matters more, how to move past the defensive narrative, and creating intentionality in the art of noticing to creating healthy habits in your relationship. Learn more with Matthew Fray

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31:11

What I’ve Learned in 10 Years of Parenting (And What...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/04/24

In this deeply personal solo episode, Dr. Tracy reflects on a decade of motherhood—and the ways parenting has reshaped her identity, her marriage, her boundaries, and her inner world.This episode isn’t a guidebook. It’s a truth-telling moment for anyone feeling lost, tired, or stretched too thin. RESOURCES: Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here! Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: Take it here Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100

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48:01

The Romance You Want Starts With These Questions with...

Dear Dr. Tracy ·

2025/04/17

In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits down with author and producer Lindsay Jill Roth to talk about her new book, Romances and Practicalities—a love story woven together with 250 thoughtful questions designed to deepen connection and spark meaningful conversations between partners.Together, they explore the space where romance meets real life—how couples can navigate everyday responsibilities without losing the spark, and why asking better questions is the secret to building a lasting relationship

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