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PODCAST

The Captain"s Log

The Captain’s Log is a podcast from The Whatnauts where we can talk about all the pop culture news that has caught our attention, share stories from our lives, and get into all kinds of shenanigans. We play games, talk about the movies and TV shows we are watching, and have a great time just hanging out.

tv & film

All Episodes

109:38

Interesting Blue

The Captain"s Log ·

2025/01/15

Episode 287. It's a snowy start to 2025, blessing Melissa with a sighting of the rare Snow Stan. Kyle still doesn't know how to drive but now has a new car. We catch up on winter break moviegoing and read over our media stats from 2024. Kyle read dozens of detective novels, implores us all to watch Pachinko, and introduces us to Chicken Nugget, a Korean show about a girl who turns into an anonymous, silent chicken nugget and her father and boyfriend just have to deal with that. Melissa

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134:34

The Whatnauts Grand Prix 09

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/12/18

Kyle and Melissa are here for a chill end-of-year celebration, looking back on our year in podcasting and looking ahead to our 2025 goals. We give out our Review Show awards, play a game of "What the Hell Were We Talking About?", run through our recent cinema experiences, talk about fancy cocktails and fancy mansions, and finally share our thoughts on the weird twist in the otherwise conventional neo-noir show Sugar.Click here to watch a video of this episode.(00:00) - Intro (00:03) -

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149:06

Rotten Tomatoes Movie Predictions 2025

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/12/11

Episode 287. We're back for a feature-length discussion on movies! We go over our predictions for the Rotten Tomatoes critics' score for the past year's movies, and create predictions for the year ahead. What movie got an even 50? What's the lowest score we've ever seen? Do we think Mission: Impossible -- The Final Reckoning could match or beat the score for Dead Reckoning? Which will score better, Superman or Fantastic Four: First Steps? How many people will die in The Monkey? How many

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79:24

Bit by a Helicopter

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/11/13

Episode 285. We have a lot of existing movies to talk about, like Conclave, Anora, Heretic, and Piece by Piece, and we have an exciting pitch for a new Inspector Gadget movie that's a Substance-esque body horror but also one of his hands is a different vape on each finger. Hear us, Hollywood!!! Melissa reveals the most mysterious song on the internet. Kyle looks at all those chickens (it's just one chicken). We discuss the trailers for Brave New World and Thunderbolts*, where we want to see

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85:14

McRib Sterling VI: The McRooms

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/10/30

Episode 284. Your ghost hosts Slimer and Mimer are here for another Halloween special re-telling old Captain's Log anecdotes as "scary" "stories." Enjoy your szechuan McFlurry as you hear tales of the last two Kyles in the world, a life wrapped in foil, being kicked by the NFL robot, the fate of The Boobie Bouncer, your life being mysteriously tied to a movie marketing stunt, German Monday, the scariest 90s cartoon character to encounter in a liminal void, and old internet meme becoming a

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86:47

I Now Pronounce You Two Monoliths

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/10/21

Episode 283. Kyle gets attacked by a falcon. Melissa dares to ask if vests are just adult bibs, and if you can make a paper football out of a Fruit Rollup. She eats an entire bowl of Kelce Mix cereal while Kyle recaps his old roommate's wedding in great detail. We read through our Movie Fantasy League drafts, marvel at Maymont Park, praise Liquid IV, ask if Saturday Night needed more chaos, and applaud SIXTY-YEAR-OLD MAN Keanu Reeves for becoming a race car driver.Click here to watch a

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86:02

Hitting Brach Bottom

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/10/02

Episode 282. Get out your T-squares, we're talking Megalopolis! Melissa tries to sell us on The Substance, and Kyle shares the cartoon joy of Transformers One, Avatar: The Last Airbender live in concert, and being the first and maybe only person in his city to buy a ticket to see a Gundam movie in theaters. Melissa recaps her trip to Disney World, featuring edutainment and a biiiig cookie. We also discuss trailers for Thunderbolts*, Ballerina, and Sinners, and try to identify the Mtn Dew

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74:20

A Big Year for Sandworms!

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/09/18

Episode 281. With the success of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice and Dune: Part Two at the box office, is a sequel to Tremors far behind? What if it's already secretly on the calendar, masquerading as a normal film, but surprise, a big worm pops out at the end? Kyle gives us advice on surviving a plane trip. Melissa shares the mystery of Celebrity Number 6. We discuss your new stepdad The Boobie Bouncer, a dishwasher mistake, our favorite weird little guy, Coke-flavored Oreos and Oreo-flavored

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81:16

Wet Detectives

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/09/06

Episode 280. Kyle goes kayaking in Tampa and sees dolphins and maybe the world's largest sand dollar. Melissa goes to a metal concert less for the music, more for live snakes and big demon puppets. She also deals with her office moving to a new building full of liminal white hallways, heat traps, and incessant beeping. We talk about the prolific crime series Homicide: Life on the Street now that it's finally streaming, the bizarre Tommy Westphall Universe from St. Elsewhere, and the

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77:25

Blue Guy & Green Guy Meet Blue Guy & Green Guy

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/08/21

Episode 279. Now that the Olympics are over, it's time for fall to begin, with random sightings of kids out in public already wearing their Halloween costumes. We get nostalgic with Didi and confounded with Borderlands, and discuss two new movies based on true events starring the actual people from those events, Kneecap and Sing Sing. We recap movie and TV news from D23 and beyond, including Pixar's first TV show, the weirdly horror-tinged Tron: Ares, and a Pacific Rim prequel. Melissa is

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74:29

The Doom We Made Along the Way

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/08/07

Episode 278. Kyle almost witnesses a road war. Melissa is blindsided by a new holiday and eats the best brownie that she may never encounter again. We discuss the wild rides of Longlegs and Trap, and recap the news out of Comic-Con! RDJ is our new Dr. Doom, but what if Marvel kept going and just announced more Dooms every couple weeks until we had a movie of nothing but Dooms? We talk about the potential plans for Doomsday and Secret Wars, DC trailers for Creature Commandos and The Penguin,

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83:25

McQueen of the Backrooms

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/07/24

Episode 277. If our slogan is that we "thirst for the taste of legend," and Oklahoma City is building the world's tallest building and calling it Legends Tower, we understand the bargain we've unknowingly struck to lick that building. Kyle tries a new gin and this leads him to the world of evil video game mods on YouTube. Melissa reads us a list of Street Shark names and feels the wind at a showing of Twisters. We try to describe the plots of Kinds of Kindness, talk about The Acolyte and

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64:23

Trivia Night 2024: Back in Action

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/07/10

Episode 276. Ignacio, Kyle, and Melissa gather once more for our annual trivia night! We trade custom questions about pop culture, science, soda, and shockingly, sports. What is the longest-running anime series? What year did the first Funko Pop debut? What type of food was the defunct Taco Bell item known as the "Bell Beefer?" Join us for the thrill of competition, the joy of learning!(00:00) - Intro(00:04) - Welcome and banter (02:10) - We don't really need to explain trivia, do

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79:52

In My Bunsen Burner Era

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/06/26

Episode 275. We identify a rival beverage enthusiast podcast, and ask how we can experiment more with our taste-tests, by wearing lab coats and drinking Mtn Dew out of beakers. Melissa advocates for the geriatric crime thriller Thelma, and goes to comedy podcast shows to see pizzas delivered live on stage. Kyle visits a wet n' wild paint room and catches up on the reboots of Twin Peaks and Clone High. We also discuss careful docuseries selection, the horny antics of the Olympic village, and

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85:55

Two Megatrons

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/06/12

Episode 274. How many movies does a person need to go see in a year to maintain a prosperous box office? How many Kyles need to gather in one place to get a world record? How do we continue to find new qualms and gripes about the one M&Ms commercial with the mime? We answer these questions, and discuss recent horror movies I Saw The TV Glow and In a Violent Nature, casting news for the next Benoir Blanc whodunnit Wake Up Dead Man, noir detective music tastes, sharpening your knives on a

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66:16

An Inspirational Story About Goku

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/05/29

Episode 273. It's the return of our annual tradition: Kyle and Ignacio force an oblivious Melissa to predict what video game news will be released at Summer Games Fest, and she has to compete against a Magic 8 Ball to see who can get the most correct guesses. Will we see a new Grand Theft Auto trailer this year? How about a new Metroid game? How many Goku variants will appear in DragonBall Sparking Zero? More than 20?? Also, Ignacio moves to the desert, Kyle discovers Japanese ramune soda,

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73:19

The Reverse Godfather

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/05/15

Episode 272. Kyle asks if modern screen acting performances have more spit and snot than ever before. Melissa ponders a reverse Godfather where the mob puts a bed inside your horse. We praise the new Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, including a break for spoilers and a debate on low box office vs. a theater full of people on their phones. We also discuss new releases The Fall Guy and Challengers, the buffness and blandness of Reacher, new movies in the Lord of the Rings world, and how the

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74:40

Roboburger

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/05/01

Episode 271. Kyle spots the menacing figure from the Neighborhood Watch sign in real life. Melissa asks when in your TV and movie watching you're supposed to fit in time to stare at a keepsake digital photo frame. We discuss robot restaurants, how good a person's clapping skills can be, recent TV hits Shogun and Under the Bridge, cinema oddities Sasquatch Sunset and Boy Kills World, filling out a Cinemascore ratings card, promising new movie trailers, and the entire shopping body of a

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91:43

Drawing Pokemon From Memory

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/04/17

Episode 270. You think you know what Bulbasaur looks like, but how accurately can you draw him in three minutes with no visual reference? We challenge ourselves to draw Pokemon from memory, and proceed to screw up some arms and legs, forget most things that go on a head, ask if there are any Magmar stans out there, and interrogate the uncanny valley of Hitmonchan. Kyle reminds us of his superhero origin story. Melissa demands an action movie starring a mime. We discuss new movies we've seen

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81:36

The Three-Meat Problem

The Captain"s Log ·

2024/04/03

Episode 269. If you can dream it, can you dog it! For this year's annual "Eat Vision and Snack" culinary episode, our theme is hot dogs. Kyle and Melissa have each prepared their own custom gourmet hot dog dishes to show off and snack on while we discuss our kitchen nightmares and triumphs. We also plan the logistics of recording an episode live from Chili's, share our mildly pleased thoughts on Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire and Godzilla x Kong, and catch up on Apple TV+ gems Servant and

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303 results

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