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PODCAST

Magnum Lovecast

Dan Savage, America"s only advice columnist, answers your sex questions on the Internets. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064 or send us your recorded question: Q@Savage.Love

health & fitness sexuality

All Episodes

80:53

Magnum Lovecast 825

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/08/16

A polyamorous trilingual woman wants to explore dirty talk. Her lovers all speak different languages. But she finds that when she’s talking dirty in her mother tongue it sounds and feels more aggressive than she would like. Any multi-lingual dirty talkers out there with wisdom to share? A bi woman and her man used to go to co-ed bathhouses. Once covid hit, they stopped. Now that there’s monkeypox to consider, should they stay out of this bathhouse? Or can they still go if they only play with each

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42:06

Magnum Extra: Gareth Russell

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/08/11

Everybody ready for a break from our fraught political moment? Pour yourself a drink, sit back and let Dan Savage and historian Gareth Russell take you back to a simpler age where women got beheaded for having premarital sex. That’s right! It’s Henry the VIII, baby! Gareth Russell’s book Young and Damned and Fair: The Life of Catherine Howard, Fifth Wife of King Henry VIII got Dan Savage’s monarchist juices a flowin’ and their conversation is a bit of a deep dive into royal history. And don’t worry,

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83:57

Magnum Lovecast 824

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/08/09

A man is about to have his wedding. He and his fiancé are swingers, and he wants the whole wide world to know it. His fiancé is more reticent to let family members know. Should he tell his children that they will be staying at a swinger’s resort after the ceremony and that they plan to bang a couple of their wedding guests? Monkey pox isn’t going anywhere folks. Dan brings back Dr. Carleton Thomas to talk about the vaccine, and how to communicate about it better. On the Magnum, Dan brings back

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79:42

Magnum Lovecast 823

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/08/02

So many bi and adventurous queer men this week! A 61 year-old gay man has never, ever, ever been near a vagina since he emerged from one 6 decades ago…until now. He is seeing a trans man and finds he is loving pleasing him, but can’t quite make penetration work. And, another gay man had a great time with a trans man. So much so, that he wants to start seeing cis women. Is he ethically obliged to tell them that he has been gay all his life? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Zachary Zane, aka BOYSLUT

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44:57

Magnum Extra: Michelle Goldberg

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/28

Oh boy! We are so very honored to welcome Michelle Goldberg to Sex & Politics. Michelle Goldberg is an author and opinion writer for the New York Times. She and Dan commiserate about the state of left wing politics. Why is the right so successful at growing their numbers while the left fights among ourselves? Why is the Democratic Party riddled with elderly politicians? What does Goldberg think about Bernie Sanders? Who would she support for President in 2024? It’s all here, and of course, she

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45:01

Magnum Lovecast 822: Extra

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/27

We’re putting out a special extra show for you all. It is becoming clear that monkeypox is spreading quickly through the gay community, and that the national response has been disorganized and unclear in its messaging. Dan spoke with Dr. Carlton Thomas, a gastroenterologist, who has been treating gay men, and attests to how painful this disease can be. The two talk about the disease, dispel some myths, and discuss the danger of anonymous, multi-partnered sex right

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79:27

Magnum Lovecast 822

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/26

My boyfriend is TOO HOT! A woman is dating a very gorgeous man. The ladies come running when they walk into the bar, and some of them get nasty. At first the caller found this an exciting turn-on. But now she just feels jealous and demoralized. How can she turn the jealousy into arousal? A woman was perusing porn, and saw a man she is convinced is her ex. It’s been six years, and they parted amicably. She thinks it’s great that he’s doing this, but she feels compelled to let him know she saw it

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79:02

Magnum Lovecast 821

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/19

A bisexual woman came out to her conservative mother, and amazingly, she didn’t flip out. But she did beg the caller to keep it secret from the rest of the family. Mommy thinks there should be white pride parades. The caller’s girlfriend is Black. What could go wrong? A transman likes violent sex, almost crossing the line from consensual non-consent into rape. His wife worries that he will resent her for objecting. Therapy for all! On the Magnum, anxious polyamorists rejoice! Our guest this week is

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38:13

Magnum Extra: Phoebe Maltz Bovy

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/14

Dan chats with writer and podcaster Phoebe Maltz Bovy about her piece on Substack about drag queen story hours. They do a deep dive on how drag has morphed over the years, how the conservative right are weaponizing fears of drag queens, and how Dan Savage used to rock it in heels. If drag is interesting to you, (and you should be. It is!) this is the show for you.

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79:24

Magnum Lovecast 820

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/12

A bi man in an open relationship is disgusted by sweat- his lover’s and his own. How can he mitigate his revulsion? A macho, macho man wants to know why he (or anyone) is into hot wifing. Dan breaks it down and spells it out. On the Magnum, a man with cerebral palsy doesn’t have use of his hands, and cannot masturbate. Even worse, he lives in a small town, so sex workers are hard to find. Dan chats with disability awareness consultant Andrew Gurza, about sex with disability, and a special sex toy

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82:44

Magnum Lovecast 819

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/07/05

Look out, it’s a nibbler! A woman hates the way her new boyfriend kisses her. He nibbles on her lips even though she tells him to knock it off. Is this a worthy reason to dump him? A married gay man and his husband are newly polyamorous. But the caller wants absolutely nothing to do with his husband’s boyfriend. The boyfriend keeps making friendly overtures, like inviting the caller to parties. Can the caller maintain a social wall keeping invaders out? Should he? On the Magnum, learn a thing or

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86:55

Magnum Lovecast 818

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/06/28

A gay Irishman had a terribly unpleasant experience, when the man he was screwing twerked and gyrated until it felt like his dick was about to fall off. Is this a thing that’s happening? Or only on the Emerald Isle? A singer is worried that rough oral sex could harm her vocal cords. But she shouldn’t worry because Dan somehow roped in Jamie Barton, a very delightful mezzo-soprano opera singer to offer her professional reassurance. On the Magnum, Dan chats with former ugly duckling, current total

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82:32

Magnum Lovecast 817

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/06/21

Kissing?! Blecchhh! A 33 year old woman is a bit of a late bloomer. She has just started dating, and likes to have sex. But the kissing? It disgusts her. Her shrink told her she just hasn’t met the right guy. But she knows better. She doesn’t like to kiss and that’s that. How can she tell her fellas this? A bi woman is into daddy dom/little girl play. But she was incensed to see a warning on Porn Hub comparing her harmless kink to child pornography. Porn Hub is riddled with far darker stuff. Why

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78:28

Magnum Lovecast 816

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/06/14

Believe it or not, a straight male dom is struggling with how to be selfish in bed. As a dom, he learned to please his sub and obtain consent every step of the way. But his current girlfriend wants him to do whatever he wants. He just doesn’t know what that is… A mother overheard her daughter’s friend say she was bi. The mother wanted to pounce and avow her support and acceptance, but she said nothing. Should she say something super-nice next time? On the Magnum, Dan chats with kindred spirit Ryan

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46:38

Magnum Extra: Alex Steffen

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/06/09

This week, Dan chats with futurist Alex Steffen about climate change, what we can and can't do about it, and how to be a good ancestor.

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82:31

Magnum Lovecast 815

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/06/07

A woman has been with her boyfriend for one year. She knew he was into cam girls from the beginning of the relationship. But lately he watches cam girls all the time- even when they are having sex. Now that he is choosing cam girls over the caller, she’s beginning to wonder if there might be a problem. A man is coming to the end of his 9-year relationship with his girlfriend. But she is about to have surgery on her leg, and will need a lot of help. Is this a terrible time to break up? Can he leave

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79:30

Magnum Lovecast 814

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/05/31

A bi man in a monogamous heterosexual marriage keeps having his sexuality questioned by gay friends. It’s super annoying! Should he even bring up his bisexuality? Should he feel miffed? A woman with a newish boyfriend wants to try some consensual non-consent. Specifically, she wants to be woken from a deep sleep to him having sex with her. He readily agreed saying he would also like to be woken up mid-blow job. But how do they negotiate this ahead of time? When he’s sleeping so peacefully, she

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83:02

Magnum Lovecast 813

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/05/24

A trans man used to be an escort before his transition. Now that he is hornier than ever on testosterone, he wants to try sleeping with gay men. But in his escorting days he would disassociate to get through the sessions. How can he learn to be more present in bed with cis men? A woman has started dating an older man. In sharing their secrets, he confided that he likes to cross-dress. She’s game to indulge him, but what does she need to know about it? In these dark times there is only one man who

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37:29

Magnum Extra: Senator Scott Wiener

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/05/19

Welcome to Sex & Politics #4. This week, Dan welcomes California State Senator Scott Wiener to talk about the work he has done to alleviate the housing crisis. It’s a refreshing interview with a politician who is doing his darnedest to make good change. Will he ever run for Governor? He says no. (Dan says, “Yes please…”) He also answers a sex question about gay men ditching condoms. Do you have a suggestion for a guest we could bring on the show? Let us know at

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82:12

Magnum Lovecast 812

Magnum Lovecast ·

2022/05/17

An Australian woman in her mid 20s fondly remembers the intimate online relationship she had throughout high school. She thought he was 20, and though they never met in person, they would chat well into the early hours every night. Recently, she became curious about what became of him. She learned that he was in fact 35 at the time, with a wife and kids. When she confronted him, he was self-pitying in his defense. This relationship was good for her at the time. But the lie is galling, and if he did

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