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PODCAST

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life

We are Simon & Lorra. A married couple. Mum & Dad to three kids... One in his 20s, one at uni, one fast approaching her teens. We love each other to bits but we also realise that we want to kill each other a lot. One day that quote will probably be used against one of us in a court of law. Each episode, we"ll chat about our marriage, love life, kids, London, relationships, anything relevant in the news and we"ll recommend anything we"ve seen, played, read or listened to. Contact us on

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

26:55

#HAWSTL 022 - "A STARSTRUCK GYNAECOLOGIST"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/08/19

A bonus episode of sorts... As we'll be spending a month out of the country, we've invested in some field mics to record wirelessly and wherever we are. So, we gave them a go in the car (quite noisy) and had a bit of an unscripted chat. We talked about:• Travel plans.• The possibility of Lorra crying again on the pod.• An absolutely gross fingernail story.• Bathroom quietness in teen relationships.• A starstruck gynaecologist.• Hospital small-talk near genitals.• Jock-itch research.• A smells recap

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43:11

#HAWSTL 021 - "I'M GOOGLING 'JOCK ITCH' STRAIGHT...

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/08/18

Episode 21 of #HAWSTL (Husband and Wife Sentenced to Life) stumbles around subjects like a legless uncle at a wedding. We chat about:• Forest fruits green tea.• A bizarre car smell.• High-achieving kids who are rubbish at home.• Booking the dreaded trip to the UK.• Father-in-law similarities.• Holidays ruining health plans.• The TV theme that made Lorra cry this week.• What we want for Leo as he starts university abroad.• #INSTAGATE• A blue-tick Wife's Whinge.• An open-plan Husband's Hump.• A

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49:29

#HAWSTL 020 - "HE HAD CHRONIC DIARRHOEA. HE WAS 4 HRS...

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/08/09

We're back! And it's ep20 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life). So much going on in this one and it gets more emotional than we ever have before. We talk about:• Lorra finally extacting Simon's 'Clarksons'.• The difficulties of dieting.• The varieties of middle-aged w****rs.• Solitary exercising.• Northern accents dying out.• Whether lab-meat is veggie or not.• The UAE getting Amber status.• A 'Wife's Re-Whinge' that faced a strong rebuttal.• 'Husband's Humps' about Lorra's new 'scent'

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50:08

#HAWSTL 019 - "THERE WAS WEE LEFT IN THE TOILET"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/07/28

We're back with another bumper podcast episode of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life). We tried to record one at the weekend but SOMEONE had a strop! Instead, today we talk about...• Back to work blues.• The politics of making-up.• Games with the kids.• Olympics spoilers.• Expo crisp news.• Covid brain science.• What Millennials think makes someone old.• A 'Wife's Whinge' about the toilet flush.• A 'Husband's Hump' regarding board game 'bantz'.• A 'Would You Rather?' about stuff vs

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38:34

#HAWSTL 018 - "I HAD A PUDGASM"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/07/20

A bit of a gap since our last pod but we've squeezed plenty into episode 18 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life), including...• Surprise rain.• A working weekend at a posh hotel.• Crazy bed making.• Lorra's far-too-detailed toilet story.• A 'Wife's Whinge' about Lamp forgetfulness.• A 'Husband's Hump' about rude face surveying.• A 'Would You Rather?' about being supportive vs being honest.• A listener's (Russell) relationship fashion fight.• Recommendations of 'The Sparks Brothers'

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32:13

#HAWSTL 017 - "EPILATING THE SOUTHERN END"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/07/10

We're on a "staycation" (vomit) this weekend, so this podcast was recorded a little bit early. And for episode 17 of #HAWSTL,w e talked about...• The approaching Denmark vs England game.• Avoiding being an "It's Coming Home" guy.• Sitting down to wee,• Packing being one of the worst jobs.• The benefits of living in a holiday destination.• Purchases that cause arguments and break-ups.• A 'Wife's Whinge' about stupid-buying.•A 'Husband's Hump' about gross, lady-body job help.• A teeth vs sofa 'Would

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26:27

#HAWSTL 016 - "THRIFT SHOP AESTHETIC"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/07/07

For her birthday, our 9yr old daughter wanted to take her Spanish boyfriend for a romantic, Italian meal, which we were about to head out for, so we didn't have a heck of a lot of time... But managed to just about squeeze an episode out. Here's what we talked about...• Hating the word 'staycation'.• Our 9yr old's romantic date.• 10 things you shouldn't wear on a date.• Scary sunglasses science.• Hospital visits and kooky doctors.• A clothes pile Wife's Whinge.• A fringe-terrorist Husband's Hump.•

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27:58

#HAWSTL 015 - "NOBODY LOOKS GOOD SNOGGING"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/07/03

Episode 15 almost didn't happen because we were mid-birthday party for our youngest, Betsy Pearl. But, like the troopers that we are, we walked the fifteen paces to the studio and talked for a whole 30mins. Legends! And here's what we talked about...• Our current Chart position (26th).• Can mums have a G&T at their kid's party?• Matt Hancock Video Apologist.• What TV habits put us off someone.• Simon's "art".• The Women who buy it.• Lorra's Parosmia.• Dissing Chronotherapy.• Simon's alleged

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32:10

#HAWSTL 014 - "BED LEGS PHENOMENON"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/30

A pre-listen warning... There's a proper argument in episode 14 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life'. We also talked about...• The 'Bed Legs' phenomenon.• Science... What makes an internet troll?• Simon admits to trolling an awful car hire firm.• Lorra has a pop at Simon's Tweets.• Chrissy Teigen schadenfreude.• A survey about partner time.• Lorra's travel-ban rant.• Signs of the (allegedly fictional) male menopause.• A proper bag barney on 'Wife's Whinge'.• A 'Husband's Hump' about eyebrow

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35:08

#HAWSTL 013 - "SOMETIMES I'LL GO FULL NUDDY"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/26

Episode 13... But is it unlucky? We'll after making an appearance at No.25 in the UAE Podcast Charts, we disappeared again, so maybe there's something in it! Today we talked about...• Secret superstitions.• Lucky Perfume.• Father's Day Feedback.• "Spite-buying".• Simon's 'Dadzy' leading to an accidentally distasteful moment.• The results of our knickers survey.• Parent bedroom rules.• Wife's Whinge/Husband's Hump synergy.• Lorra's anti-husband-fondling diatribe.• Great news for men (like Simon) who

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34:15

#HAWSTL 012 - "I'M LIKE CHOCOLATE FOR P.M.S"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/23

Simon tried to get out of recording ep.12 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life', due to extreme exhaustion but Lorra twisted his arm and it could be the best episode yet! Today we talk about:• The sexy boob-grab yawn.• Potted Dog listener feedback.• Is Yorkshire a foreign language?• Being the white, middle-aged, talentless Stormzy.• Exercise/orgasm science.• 8 signs your marriage is in trouble.• A Father's Day 'Wife's Whinge'.• A sticky 'Husband's Hump'.• A time-travel 'Would You Rather?'•

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34:26

#HAWSTL 011 - "SUPERMARKET ETIQUETTE"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/19

Episode 11 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' is, once again, overflowing with marital discord and tales of trying to get by. Today we talk about...• Just how international our podcast is.• Listener feedback on mind-reading, evening crisps and middle-aged midnight.• Lorra learns what 'potted dog' is.• Multiple hospital trips in 24 hours (feat. dodgy French accent).• Dad's taking bullets and killer instincts.• Embarrassing teen Covid plasters.• Our first podcast freebie!!!• Bin damage.• A beds

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32:15

#HAWSTL 010 - "CRISP DIP PROTOCOL"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/16

We made it to double figures! And episode 10 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' (#HAWSTL) is pack to the rafters! We talk about:• Podcasters replacing friends.• Feedback on accidental texts, jab reactions & sexy-time duration.• When is Middle-Aged Midnight and the text cut-off?• The difference between day-crisps & evening-crisps.• Crisp/dip protocol.• A 'Wife's Whinge' about hiding food.• A 'Husband's Hump' about double false hope.• A 'Would You Rather?' between the bedroom and

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28:04

#HAWSTL 009 - "THERE WAS A PUDDLE ON MY CHAIR"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/12

Episode 009 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' was recorded less than 24 hours after our second Pfizer vaccine shots.Today we talked about...Yesterday's day from hell.The Relationship Card.Unusual sweat.Graduation.Strong & pretty gross Pfizer side effects.Lorra's "Wife's Whinge" about tea.Simon's "Husband's Hump" about an infuriating phone habit Lorra has.A very deep "Would You Rather?" about mind-reading.A listener voicemail about air conditioning.And a two-way compliment.Recommendations

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30:08

#HAWSTL 008 - "HE MADE LARRY GRAYSON'S FALSE TEETH"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/09

On episode 8 of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life', Lorra went for the jugular on Wife's Whinge, with an issue that will have most women screaming "YES SISTER!" out loud. We also dissected...• Making Deals with the Tooth Fairy.• A false teeth claim to fame.• A 'Lady Boxing' license-to-perv blag.• Simon's massage paradox.• Husbands and their assumptions.• An accusation about Lorra being filthy.• A "bedroom fun" 'Would You Rather?'• An email about TikTok toileting.• Lorra's album recommendations.•

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24:01

#HAWSTL 007 - "A GIANT CUTTING HIS PUBIC HAIR"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/05

Episode 7 of #HAWSTL is a real rollercoaster ride, beginning and ending in actual tears.. We talk...• The last day of school ever.• Pub lunatics... Dubai vs the UK.• A 'clicking' Wife's Whinge.• A 'hairy' Husband's Hump.• A filthy, fatherly Would You Rather?• Our brand new feature... Readers' Wives... And Husbands.• A great film recommendation.• A lovely, honest compliment.We're starting to get some great emails from you about marital humps & relationship whinges... But we want more. You can

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27:33

#HAWSTL 006 - "NATURALLY QUITE A HAIRY PERSON"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/06/02

Episode 6 of Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life is packed to the rafters...We may be accidentally sending out messages that we're swingers (we're not).• Tales of teenage stupidity.• Hitting rules in the 70s.• Simon's new, happiness vibe.• Password hell.• Top 10 reasons for getting dumped.• Garden lethargy.• A serious bathroom breach.• Lorra's commando experience.• A facial compliment.And in ourRECOMMENDATIONSbit, Simon re-recommended a great playlist if you ever need background music. It's called

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26:50

#HAWSTL 005 - "IT LOOKS LIKE POORLY WEE"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/05/30

First outing for our brand new intro jingle today.We'd done a bit of sunbathing and Lorra had done a bit of drinking before (and during) today's recording. It shows. We touch on Eurovision fame, "Covid Nose" (and the worst time for your smell to return), another Marmite/Bagel combo, Redknapp baby News and a hypothetical relationship with a model.As usual, we've got a Wife's Whinge & a Husband's Hump... And Simon introduces a brand new way to end the pod. Will it catch on? Who knows?!And in our

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27:24

#HAWSTL 004 - "INTERRUPTING A CROW'S FUNERAL"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/05/29

Episode 4...Blagging the Pfizer.A big cat in the wild.A bird in the bedroom.An animal funeral interruption.A disappointing fast food move.A minty "Wife's Whinge".A "Husband's Hump" about a (ahem) size issue.A "Would You Rather?"Recommendations.Grandma's on the telephone.If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your marital disputes, emailhusbandandwifepod@gmail.comand we'll sort them out on the show. Same email address for any communication, feedback or sponsorships (wink wink)Thanks for

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25:34

#HAWSTL 003 - "PAUL MCCARTNEY'S BAGEL"

Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life ·

2021/05/28

Episode 3 with Simon & Lorra.We talk...A rare bit of (surprisingly enjoyable) football.Lorra's stomach problem.Paul McCartney's Eye Yoga.Paul McCartney's bagel.The perils of tweens & the evil internet.Post-covid office capacity.A "Wife's Whinge" regarding table choice.A "Husband's Hump" concerning bikini deposits.A "Would You Rather?" featuring a swinging sex chair.Recommendations including Mark Ruffalo's fictional testicular injury.If you'd like to tell us about one (or many) of your

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223 results

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