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PODCAST

No Crying In Baseball

When Patti and her potty-mouthed friend talk baseball, you"ll know this is not a baseball podcast for lightweights. This is the real deal, from real fans. Because diamonds are a strong woman"s best friend, and there"s no crying in baseball.

sports baseball

All Episodes

55:08

Don’t Question the Voice in Your Head

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/04/12

Opening weekend brought us PitchCom, a couple of bench-clearing conversations, and a labor rant about MLB mobile ordering not allowing us to tip our stadium workers. Seth Beer proves our bf designation absolutely on point, plus boyfriend heroics from Teoscar Hernandez, Bobby Witt, Jr., and Juan Soto. There’s former bf joy with Nelson Cruz (if you *have* to have a DH…) and picked too soon Joey Bart, plus dominos falling with Pedro Severino. Jazz and Rachel go full Pottymouth. Patti searches

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55:00

Udders Up!

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/04/05

Patti and the Pottymouth boldly predict the upcoming season’s award winners and champions. Our logic is as airtight as you would expect (Patti goes where the Matts go and Pottymouth follows her heart). The minor leagues are brazenly getting to second base more quickly, and taking all of our money with this year’s ¡Copa de Diversión! merch. We congratulate the Tigers for treating Tork right, the Cardinals for bringing back Tio Albert, and the O’s coming to an agreement with Trey Mancini. Our

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44:03

Vigilant and Unpredictable

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/03/29

Patti and the Pottymouth reveal their Fantasy Boyfriend Baseball rosters for the new season, backing up their selections with references to Wardle vs Wordle strategies, adult beverages, philanthropy, children, and cars. So that tracks. Sticky stuff is back, bringing a new level of awkward to umpire duties. NYC caves to the sports lobby and rolls back a vaccine mandate, while Toronto fans tell unvaxxed players on US teams where to put their accusations of competitive imbalance. The Red Sox

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47:20

March is Mad and Rocking

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/03/22

NCiB boyfriends of the past are making splashy news in trades and free agency. We dwell on Freddie and the Welcome Matts, Eugenio’s qHar, and Miami’s Soler power, among other big bats and homecomings. We profile our fantasy pitching squads – Pottymouth goes west coast with Giants pitching, and Patti is still grooving on Hammers pitching since the World Series. COVID protocols are back in conversation, along with juggling NYC vaccine mandates and Canada’s public health protections. How

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73:43

Ideally, You Have an Adult Beverage in One Hand

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/03/15

Cheers to the end of the lockout, the beginning of spring training, and finally an Opening Day countdown. Patti walks you through the new CBA agreement including the rule changes, the Police Blotter feels like old times, and Pottymouth suffers the first bitter breakup of the current boyfriend season. We celebrate Pottymouth’s restraint in having saved Wander Franco until this year as her Ray’s pick, while Patti chooses dancemaster Ji-man Choi. With the matchmaking skills of our West Coast

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60:48

Can We Also Ban Rob Manfred?

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/03/08

There should be a new NCiB drinking game for the number of times we say “league-imposed lock-out” in this episode. This week’s CBA negotiation update requires Patti to add yet another layer of complication to Rule 5 Draft, talk about ghost wins (they are a thing!), note that the player’s union is taking steps to protect stadium workers but as yet the League is all talk, and remind dear listeners that spring training and the regular season could have started on time, while negotiations are

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53:24

We Digress or We Drink

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/03/01

We get feisty over “hostile” CBA negotiations, and stand with “furious” players. We call Rob Manfred on his ridiculous assertion that there is a deadline that needs to be met or games get canceled. It’s YOUR lockout, MLB! Thank you Atlanta Hammers for being compelled to release your financials therefore providing actual data. And for you billionaire vs millionaire folks, please give Sara Sanchez’s Thousandaires piece a read. Pottymouth requests a vegetarian version of new CWS boyfriend

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61:10

How Much Money Do You NEED?

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/02/22

Forced to find the good in the Yankees, Pottymouth is clearly won over by new BF Estevan Florial. Patti gives the nod to impeccably groomed Giancarlo Stanton and his “fricking forearms.” For the Cardinals, Pottymouth flies like an eagle with Edmundo “Mundito” Sosa and Patti cheers Noots-not-boos for Lars Nootbaar. We note that it is the lockout, not CBA negotiations, forcing a delay in spring training games and we catch you up on the latest proposals. We ponder the sheer size of the deal

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56:34

Get the Puck Outta Here

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/02/15

Superb Owl Sunday was the greatest cross training day of our lives. We discuss the problematic boys vs men conversation in Olympic hockey and then immediately reference baby goalies, and Patti gets uppity about her alma mater. This week brings the longest police blotter of all time, featuring domestic abuse, assault, a class action suit, and controlled substances. We are very quick to judge, but that’s the beauty of us. Pottymouth has had her eye on new Red Sox boyfriend Jarren Duran all

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63:03

Baseball Boyfriend Trifectas

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/02/09

CBA negotiations heat up a notch as the League tries to bring in the Feds while the Players instead bring in the fans. Cowboy Joe hangs up his chest protector and yet still no women umpires in sight. Pottymouth adds a prize to her Hernandez collection, naming Teoscar as her Blue Jays boyfriend. Patti puts in a bid for beer with the Biggios with her pick of Cavan. For the Reds, Pottymouth Blind Sides us by selecting Kyle Farmer, and Patti is swayed by qHAR, Mookie, and a wacky career path to

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68:13

Drugs are Different Than Rules

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/02/01

Patti and the Pottymouth make plans to join Big Papi at Cooperstown for the impending zoo and a voting makeover. There is some movement on both sides of the CBA negotiations but the stated willingness on the part of the league to miss games is Very Disappointing. The Minors will start on time and eyes will be on the mandated housing for players and the newly un-mandated vaccine situation. Pottymouth makes a one of these things is not like the other game of her Mariners BF choice Kevin

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58:59

21 Pun Salute

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/01/25

Today’s episode features a surprising number of references to Roberto Clemente, awkward puns, and post-production inserts. Pottymouth goes full Criollos for this week’s boyfriend picks – Vimael Machín for Oakland and no-no catcher Victor Caratini for the Padres. Patti’s A’s guy is Skye Bolt for many reasons that are not his name, and exercises her once a year forever boyfriend option on Padre Jake Cronenworth. Pottymouth and Big Papi both give Boston writer Dan Shaughnessy crap for his HoF

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64:46

Glass Ceilings and Outfield Walls

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/01/18

We celebrate declaring boyfriends for the Guardians instead of “The Cleveland Team.” Pals Pottymouth and Patti choose pals Yu Chang and Bobby Bradley. For the Mets, Pottymouth looks to Yadi fan Tomás Nido, while Patti goes local with Adam Jones fan Khalil Lee. International Signing Day brings a phenomenon to the Nationals and “Little Altuve” to the Blue Jays. The League brought a disappointing economic proposal to the player’s union making it even less likely spring training will start on

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55:59

The Donut Hole of Limbo

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/01/11

That’s where we find ourselves in lockout land. Coaches can get jobs (yay, Joey Cora!), but players can’t get jobs as coaches (Sorry, Adam Eaton!) There are rumors of new economic proposals but no one seems to be in a hurry to get this done. We learn that sleeping in your car at an intersection is not a crime.Pottymouth selects Captain America-level nice guy David Fletcher as her Angels BF for this season. Patti gets a little weepy over Brandon Marsh’s family and is all-in on this center

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69:26

Not A Drinking Game – But it Could Be

No Crying In Baseball ·

2022/01/04

Anzoátegui is the new “adorable.” Pottymouth’s favorite word to say not only comes up in our international baseball segment, but sneaks its way in to this week’s boyfriend picks for the Tigers and the Cubs! We begin and end with some winter heartwarmers of Minor League owners and hockey fans changing lives for the better, and we break those warm hearts a little in between.The Iowa Cubs sold to Endeavor and then surprised all of their full-time staff with a share in the profits. Kyle Seager

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32:58

Pottymouth: Origin Story

No Crying In Baseball ·

2021/12/31

It wasn’t a spider bite or gamma rays that gave Pottymouth her Red Sox fandom superpowers, it was her Dad. Hear Bob’s stories of Ted Williams, childhood trips to watch the home team from the bleachers, brushes with fame, and the nice Jewish boys playing for the church league. He confirms the till now urban legend of pulling young Pottymouth from the Fenway stands to protect her from the salty language, gives in to our awkward attempts to get him to say “Schwarber,” and becomes the only

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65:42

Beer with Grammy Pat

No Crying In Baseball ·

2021/12/28

Upon further review, Adalberto Mondesi gets the Royals boyfriend nod from Pottymouth and Patti makes another early, bold choice for ROY with Bobby Witt, Jr. For the Marlins, Pottymouth hopes for A+ with Avisaíl Garcia, and your hosts want to have a beer with the maternal grandmother of Patti’s pick, Jazz Chisolm. As the lockout continues, there’s more time to explore the economics of it all, discuss the effect on injured players, and fill that last remaining manager gig with the A’s

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65:51

Smokey Things and Santa Hats

No Crying In Baseball ·

2021/12/21

NCiB is 100% Boosted! A photo of Pottymouth’s Twins BF pick, Mitch Garver, drinking a beer while wearing his baby in a sling, has us waxing nostalgic and digging for similar photos from our own collections, while Brent Rooker’s Twitter feed is like a visit to the pop culture aisle in Patti’s brain. Showing her excellent judgment, Pottymouth sticks with Juan Soto as her forever BF when we get to the Nationals, while Patti goes hard against type with end of season breakout star Lane Thomas,

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69:08

Vulgarity, Desperation, and Shots

No Crying In Baseball ·

2021/12/14

Fueled by local distilleries and breweries, Patti and the Pottymouth present their new boyfriend selections from the Rangers and the Pirates, with a bonus of Pottymouth sharing her research strategy tips (hint: it involves googling the word “scandal”). Please welcome Adolis Garcia (made us say “ARod”), Corey Seager (also made us say “ARod”), Ke’Bryan Hayes (we want to have a beer with his dad), and Roberto Pérez (we want to have a beer with his mom). We propose a science project involving

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67:43

Our Boyfriends are Back, and Locked Out

No Crying In Baseball ·

2021/12/07

Patti and the Pottymouth kick off a new round of baseball boyfriends with their picks for the Orioles and Diamondbacks. Pottymouth profiles comeback player of the year Trey Mancini, and homegrown utility player Josh Rojas. Patti finally celebrates Adley Rutschman Day and finds a way to tie it to labor negotiations. She also selects almost-Olympian Seth Beer, because we love our Beer here at NCiB.Advocates for Minor Leaguers announces a steering committee to create a collective voice, and

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444 results

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