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PODCAST

The Fifth Column

Kmele Foster, Michael Moynihan, and Matt Welch

Your weekly rhetorical assault on the on the news cycle, the people who make it, and occasionally ourselves. Kmele Foster (Freethink), Michael Moynihan (Vice), and Matt Welch (Reason) talk and laugh and drink their way to at least quasi-sanity in a world gone mad, often with the aid of clean and articulate guests. Weekly Members Only subscription edition often comes with listener mail and professional-quality (if inappropriate) singing. Analysis. Commentary. Sedition. www.wethefifth.com

news & politics

All Episodes

25:00

Members Only #158 - Fact to Face with an Anti-Racist...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/28

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Tupac’s stepfather Mutulu Shakur* The adorable and execrable Dean Reed* The worst article The Atlantic has ever published* Champagne dreams and Fifth Column nightmares* Trump in Waco * Insulin girl!* That guy cutting your hair is definitely Russian* Georgian helicopters* Schultz and Lula and Russia* Stop saying “lived experience”* That hideous school shooting * Whatever happ…

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114:30

#399 - Dumb Debates, Dodgy Dispensaries, Paying...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/23

On Monday night, to a packed house of white supremacists and neo-fascists, Kmele debated the awkward proposition “Are we too obsessed with race?” Moynihan and Welch attended. They were amused and ultimately confused. So the lads unpack just what on Earth they witnessed. After thirty minutes of conversation about drunk Fifth fans and race-obsessed weirdos, they move on to more important subjects like Trump vs. Stormy and DeSantis, the proliferation of illegal weed dispensaries, the acquisition of

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32:15

Members Only #157 - The Sex Pope Washes Your Feet

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/20

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.comWe’re still not sure if it was Peru or Chile or Gabon, but regardless…Kmele is back from his equatorial conference…but…is even really needed?? Why, yes, he is! Because in this totally sober, totally discursive Members Only pod, the lads touch on the most important subjects paralyzing the world today: Lenny Kravitz, kids birthday parties, Hilaria Baldwin…

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105:46

#398 w/Allison Schrager - "The Horrible, No Good...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/16

We do it for you, people. We don’t necessarily want to, but we do. Because you need it. In times of national crisis, the Fifth will forgo all the fun stories so we can tackle the important, necessary stories. It’s time to take your medicine, citizens of Fifdom, and allow Allison Schrager, economist and Bloomberg News columnist, to womansplain just what is ailing the American economy and why the bros and their stupid bro banks are collapsing. According to Schrager, all the people you hate are, in

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37:37

Members Only #156 - Second Sunday Live! (Rebroadcast)

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/13

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Kmele at a Konference? Yup!* Moynihan spills a wee bit of tea about an old job 😬* The New Trump U* Commie spies * The DeSantis strategy * Matt’s baseball digression (on rule changes and the WBC)* This is a very good series * That Twitter Files circus on Capitol Hill* So this is exactly what we were talking about re: purity tests* Don’t identify as anything….* So very much…

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87:30

#397 - Just Some Bros Mainsplaining Manganese

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/09

It’s just like old times! Because the boys are back in town, recording together in an actual studio, andpregaming with listener-provided booze. So…yeah, things were pretty rough going in…Sorry about that. * We try to answer the age old question…* A handful of some, maybe, constitutes a New York Times trend* Let us, as men, explain something to you…* The sexual decline and fall of the podcast bro* “It’s not because you’re a woman. It’s because I’m an asshole.”* Does anyone at Fox believe anything?*

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33:51

Members Only #155 - Passports, Divorces, & Puerto Ricans

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/06

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Puerto Rican passports* Nothing works in New York* Jimmy the Deregulator* Fistfight Airlines * Kmele and Andrew Schultz at Brown* So what about Chris Rock’s Netflix special?* The travails of a listener’s white wife* In praise of Matt and Trey* A “national divorce” is dorm room, edgelord bullshit* The loss of Mayor Pepe* Number #9 dream

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114:13

#396 w/ Chris Stirewalt "Fired by Fox, Fixing the...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/03/01

* Stirewalt on calling Arizona for Biden and the Dominion lawsuit* On getting fired by Fox News* How journalism collapsed * Sean Hannity is not a conservative (he’s a Republican)* The Joe Manchin effect* This wouldn’t have happened under Roger Ailes* Overestimating the media’s influence * The inevitable conversation about mis- and disinformation* Would Chris cancel Alex Jones?* Cruz v. Carlson: the most excruciating interview ever?* Will Reaganism return??* Post-game: lab leak lollapalooza This is

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36:42

Members Only #154 - Konference Kmele, Konservative...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/27

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Konference Kmele* The most Jewish podcast in America?* Arguing an overcorrection* Michael Jackson, social conservative* Kmele sends Angela Davis a SASE* Slavery, King Cotton, and fighting with NHJ* The two books on slavery Moynihan mentioned* Listener question about maybe working for a racist conspiracy theorist* More thoughts on big boy mannequins* Clip from Ethan Suple…

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24:07

Members Only #153 - Make Way For the Big Boyz

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/20

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Apocalypse apparel* No country for fat men* Singal white journalist * A left-wing Matt *Walsh* stan * Books don’t make a man* Kancel Kmele Pls* On Mistaken Misgendering* Dippin toes, stepping on rakes* A message from Julia (TBC)* Moynihan engineers a Fifth Marriage* The zaps of SSRI withdrawl…* Burning down the house - followed by * A listener wonders: were my Italian grandpa…

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89:05

#395 w/ Katherine Mangu-Ward "Nothing Is True and...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/16

* Moynihan’s hobo disaster* KMW, disinformation queen, stops by for a few, tells us how she broke her kneecap* KMW: The Fifth is staffed by crotchety scare-mongering old dudes (Ed. - This is disinformation)* So why *is* KMD the disinformation queen?* Wait, what does “disinformation” even mean??* The movie Contact is pretty libertarian * Killing old people, dead crank doctors, and libertarian Rachel Welch* According to hundreds of stupid people, the New York Times is a hate group or something*

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116:50

#394 w/ Jamie Kirchick "Hammer Time, Larry Craig...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/09

* How Jamie ended up writing about Armie Hammer* So what *is* the Hammer story anyway?* How the motivated reasoning media ignores inconvenient inconsistencies* Is there a path back from an utterly destroyed reputation?* How Jamie’s book Secret City informed his reporting* Heroes and homophobia* So is it true what they say about James Webb?* The Lavender Scare and Joe McCarthy* Who was worse, JFK or RFK?* Would anyone care about Larry Craig in 2023?* Why was Moynihan at a political event in Florida

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32:35

Members Only #151 w/ Ethan Strauss - DEI Man and the...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/06

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Armie of the damned* Jamie Kirchick’s piece on Armie Hammer* The Robin DiAngelo of Sports* Ethan’s piece on “DEI man” Richard Lapchick* The question that ended Ethan’s interview with Lapchick* The NBA’s Foreskin Ceiling * “In this day and age…”* Maverick Carter isn’t going to hire you* That shocking 1976 PBS documentary about racism in Queens * Kids don’t like sports any…

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112:07

#393 "Black Stalin, Objectivity Is Racist, & Tax...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/02/02

* The George Wallace travel app* The genius and utter stupidity of WEB Dubois* That disgraceful Dubois obit for Stalin* A copy of the Conservation of Races book* Len Downie’s rotten, horribly written piece about objectivity in news* Jeff Gerth’s really good piece about Trump-Russia coverage* Remember Hamilton 68? Bush 911? Heaven 17?* Hunter’s sexy jobs program* Did anyone notice that Ol’ Joe said that weird lie again?* Racist tax robots* What’s good for me isn’t good for thee, silly poor person*

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46:21

Members Only #150 - Memphis Madness, Ubiquitous White...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/31

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* A famous Texas hat* Kmele’s Twitter beef with a former guest* The tragedy in Memphis, the predictable response* Ubiquitous white supremacy* Don’t even read Mark Twain aloud* A listener speculates on Kmele’s “blackness”* Back to Texas: they are just nice people, says Moynihan* Name this listener’s baby* The etymology of “Kmele”* Nicola Sturgeon splutters when asked about …

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123:51

#392 "Tanks for Victory, Oscars So Boring, and Ben...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/26

A sober first segment about war and death is interrupted by our chaotic and fatphobic friend Ben Dreyfuss, who joins the Fifth to discuss his insane Twitter account and why he keeps making people really mad. * We haven’t seen many of these Oscar movies* German Leopards for Ukraine* The arrival of “Jaws star Richard Dreyfuss' actor son Ben, 36, [who was] slammed for saying he'd never have sex 'with a fat person’”* That Daily Mail article / We read Ben some of the comments* Wait, why did Ben get fired

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33:41

Members Only #149 - Georgia on Our Minds

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/24

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit wethefifth.substack.com* Santos: Hotter as a lady?* Hunter is a shitty person who makes shitty art* Kmele shuts down a Netflix indoctrination session* Georgia: Stupid people play stupid games and win stupid prizes * A shooting in LA * Another shooting in LA* A tribute to a listener* More on Cormac McCarthy (and Camus and Sartre)* Objecting to Douglas Murray* On the weirdness of the Phantom of th…

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136:32

#391 "Debt Drama, DEI, and Deceased Rock* Legends*"

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/20

* Release The List* Crosby, Not So Great* A Few Nights In Chicago* Squashing Racism ($5 Million at a Time)* Reparations and the US Constitution * A Seat at the Table* Hereditary Culpability and Entitlement* Manhattan Beach* Daily Wire vs. Mug Club* Drew Carey 🖤 CDC* “We ain’t gonna talk bout dem papers (so y’all can quit asking)”* Debt Limit Hold’em* The Anti-Woke Caucus* Florida’s “Objective” Nonsense* What Students Deserve* “If We Lose, You Lose”Recorded: 1/19/23Published: 1/20/23 This is a

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133:27

#390 "Stupid People, Stupid Ideas, and Stupid...

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/14

* The Corvette Papers* “So my friend gets arrested for murder in South Sudan…” * No sex please, he’s British * The times, they have a’ changed * From Belfast to Pyongyang* If I Did It: Eichmann versus the neo-Nazis* Russophilia, left and right* America: a net exporter of bad ideas* Is there a war on the West?* Douglas’s new podcast, Uncancelled History* In defense of Lincoln and Churchill* Regrets, I’ve had just…one* Disqualifying Kant and Hume* That idiotic USA Today piece cited by Matt * And so

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114:23

#389 "We Need to Talk About Kevin (w/ former Rep....

The Fifth Column ·

2023/01/05

* Former Rep. Justin Amash was on the floor during the leadership fight??* Brian Lamb question: What does the speaker actually do?* And what do the Gang of Twenty actually want?* Rep. Amash: Kevin McCarthy “isn’t that bright” and “will do whatever it takes to maintain power”* Why the system is broken and how it got that way* Congress is becoming more European * Reminder: Amash created (and named) the Freedom Caucus* Are you really putting yourself forward to be speaker?* The whole system is broken

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