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PODCAST

Park Bench Ontology

is a low-stakes existential crisis disguised as a comedy podcast for people quietly losing faith in the script of modern life. Each week, comedian and writer Gavin Stephens dissects the absurd machinery of capitalism and culture — from sitcoms to wealth inequality, Baudrillard to people who talk in the movies — exposing the broken myths, invisible rules, and slow-motion collapse we all pretend isn’t happening.Presented by The Chonilla Network. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more

comedy philosophy

All Episodes

129:21

Episode 108 – #NoMoreAlberta

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/04/13

Nick Durie joins us again on a bright, beautiful Sunday afternoon in downtown #HamOnt. We start off by asking if it’s okay to fuck an angel, then we take a stab at modern feminism. What does it take to be a good comic? We go into it. Hackers, Madonna does stand-up, artificial intelligence and much more!

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75:44

Episode 107 – Arguing Ari & Easter

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/04/05

Gavin joins us after his 16+ day tour, and tells us about his experiences throughout different cities on the west coast. We “celebrate” Easter by talking shit about Moses and The Ten Commandments. We also talk (argue) about the recent Ari Shaffir scandal, and the Trevor Noah’s tweets.

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104:55

Episode 106 – Megan Answers Our Questions

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/04/01

Megan Pettit (@meganshpettit) and Nick Durie (@ndurie) join us. We talk about the plane that turned back home after a passenger crop dusted the entire cabin. Megan takes our questions, and as you’d expect, they’re all misogynist and awful. Manolis tells us a story about how he made an audience member cry.

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178:34

Episode 105 – Sex Refrigerators & Viral Douchebags

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/03/23

Isi starts off the podcast by trying to register brazzers.porn, but it’s already registered. Nick Durie joins us again. We talk about a small, confused town named Taber, Alberta – that has recently banned swearing, spitting and yelling. A couple of asshole teens go viral for throwing a hamburger and drink at a sleeping man at McDonalds – but don’t get the response they were hoping for. Because they’re fucking douchebags. Then we talk about swinging with other couples.

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126:24

Episode 104 – The JUNOS

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/03/16

Isi Commisso comes back to the circle, along with Nick Durie. We talk about the JUNOS in Hamilton, and Manolis’ crush on Alanis Morissette. The guys get into some comedy stories, and like usual, we should probably not be putting them online.

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146:20

Episode 103 – Women’s Day & Mayce’s Goose

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/03/08

Mayce’s pet goose turns three. Manolis makes us all proud by fucking his Fleshlight (purchase here!) once again – which has been used at least five times. The guys discuss recent shows in Brantford and Kitchener. We also pay respect to International Women’s Day, but of course, Manolis’ stories didn’t really make it easy.Remember to join in on our #GirlsNightOut Stock Photography Challenge!

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111:43

Episode 102 – Air Band

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/03/02

First time comics Nick Durie (@ndurie) and Ethan Morice (@ethanmorice) join us, while we get into what it’s like to become a comic, your first time on stage, and dealing with bombing. We also decide to start an air band.

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126:44

Episode 101 – Sitcoms & Vanilla Ice

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/02/22

We talk about Mayce’s new AUX channel show, PrankYou. Then we dive into sitcoms, like Two and a Half Men. Did you know the “laugh track” wouldn’t even exist if it weren’t for Hitler? Jordan explains. We also talk about toxic people & how to handle them.

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128:46

Episode 100 – Melanoma In Your Ass

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/02/16

Gavin starts off by comparing the podcast to the KKK. Was the moon landing faked? We order Chinese food to celebrate the big 100. Manolis’ “asshole tanning” invention gets ripped off by another entrepreneur. #BrianWilliams & the new #Ghostbusters.

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142:25

Episode 99 – #HamOnt Comedy Scene & The Monetary System

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/02/08

The Hamilton comedy scene is taking off and everyone’s starting to notice – we talk about Hamilton Magazine’s (@hamiltonmag) front page feature. Is Amy Shumer a jerk? We decide. Then, we also take on the anti-vaccination crowd and the monetary system. Why not, right?

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175:07

Episode 98 – Graphing Hook

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/02/01

Our first topic: we talk about the proper disposal of a dead or dying cat, quickly cover the spelling of “grappling hook”, then resume cat disposal methods. Gavin sees Charlie Kaufman’s movie, Synecdoche, New York. Colin Quinn argues that “cool comics” aren’t authentic, and harms the comedy scene.

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140:56

Episode 97 – Gun & Hammer Brothers

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/01/30

We offer our opinions of the locally notorious Eastgate Square robbery by two dudes – one with a gun, the other with a…hammer? Then we all went down the natural progression of “what if we robbed a store?” If you could live forever, would you want to still be able to have a boner? Robot dicks are covered extensively. “We’re supposed to fuck these things, right?” was said in this podcast. Enjoy.

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135:04

Episode 96 – #JeSuisCharlie

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/01/18

Guest comedian Jordan Hoath joins us. We read Manolis’ love poem, and ask him how he’s doing after his recent breakup. We also discuss the recent terrorist attacks in Paris. Bill #Cosby is met with protestors at his Hamilton show. The guys debate over patio anti-smoking laws. #JeSuisCharlie

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117:56

Episode 95 – Heartbreak & #Cosby

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/01/11

Hilarious comedian Megan Pettit (@meganshpettit) joins us while we talk #Cosby. Hamilton mayor Fred Eisenberger says he won’t be going to the #Cosby show, but hopes others make their own decision. Manolis talks about his recent breakup, and we examine the recent surge in popularity of vinyl records.

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104:26

Episode 94 – Dustin Diamond’s Rage

Park Bench Ontology ·

2015/01/05

This week we briefly try to pretend we know anything about the missing AirAsia flight. Dustin Diamond goes crazy and stabs a dude in the arm pit. How old were you when you first watched porn? Marriages are down, porn viewership is up – we examine the connection. The Interview is released and Mayce introduces us to “Henry’s Kitchen.”

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123:20

Episode 93 – Vegetarians & Secret Santa

Park Bench Ontology ·

2014/12/29

Guest Michael Moses joins as while we talk about Manolis’ new vegetarian diet. We exchange some ridiculous gifts for our half-assed secret Santa. Would you open for Bill Cosby if given the chance? We also talk about “The Interview” and implications of responding to threats from North Korea. Also, Manolis admits to having sex in recreational centres.

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90:05

Episode 92 – Window Sex

Park Bench Ontology ·

2014/12/23

Where was Gavin today? He refuses to tell us. We play another round of “racist, bigot or prejudice?” We also launch our new website!

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128:39

Episode 91 – #Conan & #PETA

Park Bench Ontology ·

2014/12/15

Are you tired of “to the left of me is…?” Too bad. Comedy and depression, why are they often linked? Is philosophy in comedy ego or altruistically driven? We try to get Gavin on #Conan and #PETAs interesting #HamOnt billboard is discussed.

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85:11

Episode 90 – Porn Preferences

Park Bench Ontology ·

2014/12/08

Mayce talks about his first magic gig…at a biker bar. We revisit the Michael Brown case just as Darren Wilson is found not guilty. We also discuss interracial porn preferences.

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146:25

Episode 89 – Bill Cosby & Psychopaths

Park Bench Ontology ·

2014/12/01

Toronto experiences another week of sexual harassment (weird), we talk about diets, the history of jazz and musicians & comedians stealing from others. Yep, we talk about Bill Cosby, and what it takes to be a psychopath. A set of questions might lead you down a path you don’t like.

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386 results

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