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PODCAST

Hot and Bothered

Not Sorry Productions

Hot and Bothered is all about the power of romance culture. We analyze romance novels and movies to better imagine our own happy endings. Episodes release weekly on Tuesdays.CURRENT SEASON: Hot and Bothered (Movie Edition)We make Hot and Bothered because we are interested in the way that love stories have impacted our lives and culture. For our fifth season of the show, we’re turning our attention to romantic films. Vanessa and Hannah McGregor dig into the canon of romantic films,

arts relationships

All Episodes

24:58

Epilogue

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/12/03

This week Vanessa talks about how the Friends-to-Lovers trope reflects the love she has for her real life partner, and how writing her own romance novel has allowed her to discover the importance of trust in her relationships.Meanwhile, Ariana interviews Vanessa about the importance of happy endings, how romance novels have helped her through her own life, and why she and Ariana started this podcast anyway. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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33:02

Let This Drive a Wedge Between You: Lauren Sandler

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/11/26

Vanessa and Julia deal with a Reddit question from a woman whose boyfriend has recently found religion. Should his attempts to convert her end their relationship?To explore this question, Vanessa talks with journalist Lauren Sandler about her research on Christian Romance Novels and their writers. At the heart of their discussion lies the question: how religion can affect romance? They discuss how religion can bring some people closer, and can tear others apart. Hosted on Acast. See

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42:48

Extra-Virgin (Like Olive Oil)

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/11/19

This week, Vanessa’s friend, Liz, writes on the “Widowed Virgin” trope, telling the story of a Jewish widow who finds sexual awakening after her husband’s death. Vanessa reflects on her own Jewish upbringing, and confronts the familial urge to marry within the religion.Vanessa, whose partner is non-Jewish and German, examines what it means to love someone outside of the community she was raised in. She turns to her brother, who married a wonderful Jewish woman, to discuss how important it really is

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43:07

Delete Your Social Media: JenReadsRomance

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/11/12

This week Vanessa and Julia discuss a boyfriend’s jealousy of his girlfriend’s dream man. Can someone’s fantasy life be threatening to their relationship?To get answers, Vanessa talks with popular Romance advocate and critic Jen Prokop, of @JenReadsRomance on Twitter, about romance novel covers and why they should (or shouldn’t) change. We also hear a clip from Vanessa’s interview with Nichole Perkins who talks about representation in romance covers, and how they could improve.Send us your own

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52:26

Treat Today Like No One is Watching

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/11/05

Jen wants to write a romance with her daughter as the main character. Vanessa just doesn’t understand why it has to be so...creepy.This week on Hot & Bothered, Jen uses the trope “Fake Relationship to True Love” to explore what her daughter’s future relationship might look like as a powerful, self-actualized woman in the modern world. When it takes a creepy turn, Vanessa wonders what sort of message Jen is hoping her daughter will hear. With the help of The New York Times’ romance columnist

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33:05

Stay Safe: Steve Almond

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/10/29

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy tackle one of the most intense Reddit questions yet: a girlfriend considering leaving her boyfriend -- a serial drunk driver.With the stakes high, Vanessa and Julia struggle with how to give the best advice. For advice on advice giving, Julia turns to advice columnist, podcaster, and writer, Steve Almond. Together, they discuss the patriarchal problem of male rage, and what lies between the lines of love advice questions.Send us your own romance advice

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35:49

A Really Solid 60% Guy

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/10/22

Elizabeth and Vanessa’s parents both got married fast, and fell in love after.This week on Hot & Bothered, Elizabeth writes about the trope “Marriage of Convenience.” She’s taking this opportunity re-write her parents failing marriage with a happy ending. But the more Elizabeth writes, the more Vanessa wonders if Elizabeth is carrying some of the worst parts of the trope into her own life. She and Vanessa explore: how parents can inform our own idea of love, what it means to settle versus what

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32:47

Monogamy Isn’t Working: Katie and Pam Mingle

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/10/15

This week, Vanessa is joined by Katie Mingle from 99% Invisible. They explore this week’s Reddit question written by a woman in a 10 year relationship who’s experiencing feelings for another man.To find an answer, Vanessa and Katie call Katie’s mother, romance novelist Pam Mingle. Together, they revisit a question from earlier in this season: whether love at first sight exists. Pam, Katie and Vanessa consider the difference between romantic love and motherly love, the failures of monogamy, and

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38:52

Mom, Don't Listen

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/10/08

Marissa Martinelli is writing a real sex scene. Vanessa is READY.This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Mistaken Identity.” As Marissa tries to write a good sex scene for her mistaken characters, she and Vanessa explore the vulnerability of explicit sexuality, and wrestle with the freedom and the oppression of coded sexual language.Vanessa turns to writer, romance-novel reader, and co-host of Thirst Aid Kit Nichole Perkins to understand what we talk about when we talk about throbbing

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30:38

It’s Eyeballs: Meredith Goldstein

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/10/01

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy marvel over their favorite Reddit dating advice question yet: a girlfriend curious about her boyfriend’s LOCKED DRAWER containing a secret object he refuses to divulge.For insight into the most mysterious relational secrets, Vanessa turns to advice columnist, entertainment reporter, and paranormal romance novel reader Meredith Goldstein. Together, they explore the boundaries of privacy, paranormal intimacy, and what we keep in drawers.Send us your own romance

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44:54

In the Next Exam Room

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/09/24

Vanessa and Brigid share everything with each other - their thoughts, their feelings, even their endometriosis diagnosis.This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Friends to Lovers.” In her writing, Brigid reckons with the way love changes in the transition from friendship to partnership. Together, Vanessa and Brigid wrestle with what they share with friends, what they share with their partners, and the intimacy born from shared pain.Along the way, Rev. Dr. Matthew Potts returns to shed

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34:44

Questionable Man: Amy Hollywood

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/09/17

This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy fight over the appropriate unsolicited advice to give a Redditor who just discovered his girlfriend lied to him about her virginity.To make sense of their conflict, Vanessa turns to feminist and religious scholar Amy Hollywood. Together, they explore the religious history and origins of virginity, and the implications of how virginity is portrayed today.Send us your own romance advice questions for future episodes on our website at

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45:14

A Helpful Scam

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/09/10

Vanessa and her sister-in-law Suzanne agree: love-at-first-sight is questionable at best. Even still, Suzanne wants to explore a love-at-first-sight romance novel while anticipating the birth of her first child.This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Love at First Sight.” Suzanne considers how a parent’s “supposed” to feel upon first sight of their newborn child, and how love grows and evolves over time. Vanessa considers the limitations of love-at-first-sight stories in a world full

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40:56

The Conundrum

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/08/27

It’s no secret Olivia and Molly would love to have a baby. Vanessa thinks she might want a baby, but isn’t so sure.This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope of “Secret Baby.” Olivia and Molly have been patiently hoping and working to bring a baby into their life. In the meantime, they craft their own vicarious happy ending, baby and all. Vanessa considers her ambivalence about having a baby, and invites a chorus of loved ones to weigh the pros and cons of her bringing a child into the

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27:38

Divorce Him: Emily Nagoski

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/08/20

That’s right! You work on your writing, we’ll work on other people’s love lives!This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy offer their support and unsolicited advice to an especially distraught Redditor wondering what to do with a husband who claims he’s no longer sexually attracted to her because of her past trauma.In addition to the obvious answer (divorce him!), Vanessa turns to sex educator and NYT best-selling author Emily Nagoski to better understand the nuances around attraction, sexual

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46:51

We All Hate Kokomo

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/08/13

Vanessa has been faithfully holding onto her old love letters. Her friend Sejal, however, has decided to burn her own memorabilia and never look back. Which one is right?This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Reunited Lovers.” Sejal has made peace with her past and seeks a vicarious happy ending for two fictional former flames. Vanessa, on the other hand, is forced to confront the reality of a former toxic lover and what it means to doctor the evidence of her romantic history.Along

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28:45

No Such Thing as Too Many Romance Novels: Margaret H....

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/08/06

Another week to work on your next writing assignment? You’re welcome! This week, Vanessa and friend Julia Argy offer more unsolicited advice to a romance-fraught Redditor caught between the love she has in her arms and the love she’s read about in books.Torn between fantasy and reality, Vanessa turns to librarian, pop culture expert, and America's Next Top Best Friend Margaret H. Willison to discuss the power of fantasy, and how imagining the love we *could* have helps us get the love we

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44:44

Best Friend Lady Pirates

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/07/30

Ariana Nedelman wants to write a romance novel, no matter how much it hurts. Vanessa Zoltan loves her friend Ariana, and doesn’t want her to do things that hurt!This week on Hot & Bothered, we explore the trope “Enemies to Lovers.” Ariana confronts her own enemy, writing, in hopes she may grow to love it again. Vanessa reckons with letting a toxic enemy near her dearest friend.Additionally, we get some guidance from Professor Stephanie Paulsell at Harvard Divinity School, and our next writing

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28:31

Dump Him: Alyssa Cole

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/07/23

Haven't finished the first writing assignment? No problem! We know writing takes time, so you'll have two weeks for each of Julia Quinn's assignments. In the meantime, Vanessa and her friend Julia Argy will buy you some time and turn to Reddit romance questions to offer their unsolicited (but solid) dating advice. This week’s advice? Dump Him.As Vanessa and Julia consider how power and money work negatively in real dating relationships, Vanessa turns to award-winning romance novelist Alyssa Cole to

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47:08

Justice for Dragons

Hot and Bothered ·

2019/07/16

Vanessa Zoltan thinks that happy endings are the best part of romance novels. Bryce Gilfillian is writing his first romance novel and refuses to write a happy ending.This week on Hot and Bothered, we explore the trope of “Updated Fairytale.” Bryce sets out to write the gay fairytale he never had growing up. Meanwhile, Vanessa wrestles with her own princes, witches, and dragons.Along the way we get a little help from Professor of Folklore and Mythology at Harvard University, Maria Tatar, and receive

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