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PODCAST

Goop Yourself

Bryan Rucker & Aggie Hewitt

Bryan Rucker & Aggie Hewitt love and hate Gwyneth Paltrow"s lifestyle brand Goop. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

comedy alternative health

All Episodes

34:50

Ep. 47: What's TINA Got To Do With It?

Goop Yourself ·

2017/08/25

It's been a HUGE week in the Goopiverse. TINA (Truth In Advertising) is recommending Goop to be investigated for harmful and illegal health claims. Can you believe it? Unfortunately, this means the newsletters will be a snooze for the foreseeable future (no more Yoni eggs or earthing.) Aggie and Bryan catch you up on the latest legal news, discuss their fasting strategies, and guide you through a field of avocados, denim, and nontoxic bug spray. Remember to follow on insta @goopyourself, twitter

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41:08

Ep. 46: Gwyneth's Two Top Tools

Goop Yourself ·

2017/08/18

This week's goop is all about Barry & Phil, two old shrinks who may or may not have sex with each other. They devised "The Tools," tricks that will help you defeat "Part X" and live your best life. Sounds boring? It is! Luckily Aggie & Bryan dive deep into their first fast day, Grace & Frankie, and 90s diet gurus. Thanks for rating and reviewing us on Apple Podcasts, our beloved tomatoes! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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40:26

Ep. 45: Spirit Animals and Bedroom Manuals

Goop Yourself ·

2017/08/16

After another hiatus, Aggie & Bryan are back to catch you up on all things Goop! We discuss spirit animals, childhood sex hangups, liquid eyeliner, and fun salads. We're also way too excited about Apple Ivanka Martin's foray into gluten-free pizza recommendations. Bryan reports back from his brief but goopy sojurn in Reykjavic, and both he and Aggie have a big diet announcement to make. If you like the show, please rate us 5 stars in Apple Podcasts. Pakka pér fyrir! Hosted on Acast. See

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43:51

Ep. 44: You're Masturbating Like An Asshole

Goop Yourself ·

2017/07/28

Cover the kids' ears for this one! The goop newsletter is all about desire this week, and GP gets into it. She tells you how to have sex with your partner, a rando, or all by your lonesome. Don't forget to breathe and journal! Bryan and Aggie disagree on if straight men and women can be friends and the pleasures of a Boca burger, but they do agree on one thing, tunics are great! Be sure to rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts and follow us @goopyourself on insta and @goopyourselfpod on twitter

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44:37

Ep. 43: Upskirt Shots and Salad Thoughts

Goop Yourself ·

2017/07/22

Aggie & Bryan go on a journey today, touching on everything from cutting edge 80s salads to the literary canon of YA horror author Christopher Pike. We also discuss female anatomy again, so sorry. What is this podcast even about? Oh yeah, Goop. We go into the continuing saga of Gunter V. Paltrow, a new travel guide format, and another winning tip from Ask Jean. Follow us on insta @goopyourself and twitter @goopyourselfpod, and rate us 5 big ones on Apple Podcasts. Gracias! Hosted on Acast. See

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45:58

Ep. 42: Gwyneth Fights Back

Goop Yourself ·

2017/07/17

And we're back! After a three week hiatus, Aggie and Bryan have a LOT of goop to cover. We talk everything from cult documentaries to kimchi parties, from beach totes to ancient civilizations. We also discuss goop (and Dr. Steven Gundry's) strongly worded rebuttal to a certain hater (the gynocologist who said jade yoni eggs might be more poisonous than tomatoes.) Can you imagine the nerve! Thanks as always for listening. Be sure to rate us 5 stars and review us on Apple Podcasts, tell your friends,

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30:15

Ep. 00: The Long Lost Goop Yourself Pilot Episode!

Goop Yourself ·

2017/06/30

Unfortunately Bryan and Aggie are unable to record a new podcast this week, so we've dug up our very first, never released episode of Goop Yourself from way back in May of 2016. Listen to baby Aggie and baby Bryan talk about pourover coffee and anger management. We also thought describing every outfit sold on Goop would be riveting audio. Live and learn. Stay tuned for a brand new episode next week, and be sure to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. DANKE! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy

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36:33

Ep. 41: Toxic Mold and Tracy's Scold

Goop Yourself ·

2017/06/23

Aggie and Bryan argue about fanatical excerciser Tracy Anderson. Is she an aspirational goddess or a weird crackpot selling eating disorders and weird protein bars? Probably both. We also discuss how toxic mold poisoning might be prevented by tearing your house apart and following a paleo diet. Plus, $60 vibrational stickers NOT endorsed by NASA, complicated conditioning regimens, and a trip inside Gwyneth's Goop lair. Don't forget to rate us on Apple Podcasts and follow us @goopyourself on

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36:17

Ep. 40: Gwyneth Puts The Hell In Health

Goop Yourself ·

2017/06/17

Aggie and Bryan report back from (reading about) In Goop Health, the Goop Wellness Summit unleashed on the tragic white ladies of Los Angeles. It's as insane as expected, with aura photography, collagen martinis, and yoni eggs galore. We also talk about the benefits of hypnosis, Jean approved face wipes, $4500 cooking classes, and why we're all drinking water completely wrong. Please rate us five stars on Apple Podcasts, follow us @goopyourself on insta and @goopyourselfpod on twitter, and spread

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26:03

Ep. 39: Now Our Clothes Are Killing Us Too!

Goop Yourself ·

2017/06/09

On this short and sweet episode of Goop Yourself, Aggie and Bryan discuss how toxic cotton is giving flight attendants hives, and the rest of us cancer and autism. We explain why clean risotto is great, why clean 7-layer-dip is tragic, and why Jean Godfrey June is the Sean Spicer of the Goop Administration. We also touch briefly on Gwyneth's truly bizarre appearance on Jimmy Kimmel and give you a taste of what an Aggie/Bryan Costco podcast would be like. Please rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts and

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41:06

Ep. 38: Bulletproof Coffee and Presents for Papi

Goop Yourself ·

2017/06/02

This week Gwyneth forces Bryan and Aggie to confront their personality disorders. But pretty much everyone's a narcissist, right?? We also learn how to safely consume coffee, trust the mystical wisdom of old racist ladies from Laguna Beach, and shop for Father's Day (a $1000 leather ice chest and a copy of On The Road.) If you like the pod, please rate us 5 stars on iTunes and follow us @goopyourself on instagram! WE ARE GRATEFUL. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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35:41

Ep. 37: Secret Pornography & Color-strology

Goop Yourself ·

2017/05/26

This week goop debuts the most boring sex advice column the world has ever known. This, coupled with a truly basic guide to "colorstrology" makes for a dud of a newsletter. On the plus side, we teach ourselves ESP on our iphones, Aggie delves into the world of mineral sunscreens, and Bryan come out as basket non-binary. Don't forget to rate and review us on iTunes, and follow us @goopyourself on instagram and @goopyoureslfpod on twitter. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more

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40:14

Ep. 36: Matcha Smoothies and Vintage Boobies

Goop Yourself ·

2017/05/22

It's wedding season which means spending thousands of dollars on people you used to be friends with and will barely ever see again. But if you read goop you're super rich anyway so who cares! Aggie and Bryan suffer through terrible groomsman and bridesmaid gifts and self-explanatory relationship advice, but come out the other side with another fun detox to plunge into. Please excuse the audio quality, our engineer (Aggie's dog BB) messed up. Follow us on instagram @goopyourself and twitter

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44:02

Ep. 35: You Can Pry This Egg From My Cold Dead Yoni

Goop Yourself ·

2017/05/12

This week Aggie and Bryan discuss goop's passionate defense of their ICONIC yoni egg article from earlier this year. They also talk about terrible Mother's day breakfast ideas, doctors who want to sexually exploit innocent young psychics, and why any kid would want an olive oil bundt cake. Plus, we vow to start wearing more expensive sunscreen. Please follow us @goopyourself on instagram, @goopyourselfpod on twitter, and rate and review us on iTunes. NAMASTE. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy

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47:30

Ep. 34: Siblings and Cellulite

Goop Yourself ·

2017/05/05

Oh boy, it's the week before Aggie starts the goop detox and turns her life around! In the newsletter, Gwyneth ponders the burden of being way more rich and successful than her brother. We also discuss the myth of cellulite, the magic of heart math, and the absurdity of fancy baby food. Plus, a bonus interview with Aggie's baby brother Henry Klapper to discuss their truly twisted relationship. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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32:59

Ep. 33: What's the DEAL with Human Design??

Goop Yourself ·

2017/04/30

HUGE news this week as goop announces a glossy quarterly magazine with Conde Nast, and Aggie & Bryan might have to skip a month of rent in order to subscribe. In the meantime, Gwyneth shills for a straight up cult called Human Design, hawks insane Mother's Day gifts, and has a meatball making contest with noted soulless monster, Jessica Seinfeld. Follow us @goopyourself on instagram!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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32:32

Ep. 32: Peanut Sauce and Pregnancy

Goop Yourself ·

2017/04/21

Mercury is in retrograde, causing technological mishaps and near-death experiences, so Aggie & Bryan are grateful to be in the safe cocoon that is goop. This week Gwyneth basically makes a sex tape with her favorite Thai chef, and a crazy doctor shames us into a pre-natal detox. We also learn that plants are trying to kill us. Plus, New Age emoji, spring makeup, and a plea for money. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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30:20

Ep. 31: She Sells Shiso In The Goop Store

Goop Yourself ·

2017/04/14

What's that weird leaf holding the wasabi next to your spicy tuna roll? It's shiso, duh... and you're going to want to slather it all over your body because it's now starring in Gwyneth's new perfume! Aggie and Bryan dissect the new scent - but they would rather talk about fast food, Malibu, and fast food on the way to Malibu. Plus, LA's favorite astrological psychologist teaches us to grieve, and we learn how to add algae to all our favorite beverages. This episode is sponsered by Jack In The Box

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34:21

Ep. 30: You Dim Sum, You Lose Some

Goop Yourself ·

2017/04/07

On this episode, Bryan & Aggie talk tarot cards, the benefits of walking barefoot, why gen xers are just as bad as millenials, and $5400 bags designed by the Olsen Twins. They also share the disappointment and humiliation of not being included in Goop's podcast roundup. Plus, a handy dim sum guide! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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35:19

Ep. 29: Gwyneth Tells Us To Eat Sh*t

Goop Yourself ·

2017/03/31

On this episode Aggie and Bryan fear for their lives because Gwyneth convinces them that Advil causes Alzheimers and Zertec causes cancer. The only things that can heal us: apple cider vinegar and fecal implants. Plus, more tips on how to turn your kids into boring nerds, how to prevent your crush from driving you crazy, and how to get drunk at home. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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