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PODCAST

Enneagram and Marriage

Christa Hardin, MA

The Enneagram and Marriage Podcast, hosted by Christa Hardin, MA, is rooted in two decades of experience counseling and coaching couples. On top of her expert marriage advice, Christa uses the Enneagram to add another layer of understanding in how we work as individuals and gives us deeper insight into how we connect and shine together in marriage and relationships across the collective community.

education self-improvement

All Episodes

25:18

Responsive Desires: How Each Type Receives Intimacy...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/21

Understanding how your partner receives intimate invitations is just as important as how they initiate them! Discover why response styles have everything to do with personality as you learn about the gentle approach types, those who need beautiful and unhurried environments, and those who just need to know you see them in their joyful enthusiasm. We also talk about the art of saying "no" well, too, and coming back together again as well. Don't miss this excellent opportunity to refresh or recharge

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16:08

The Three Centers of Sexual Connection

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/16

Discover why you and your partner seem to have completely different experiences during intimacy! In this revelatory episode, Christa explores how your Enneagram type determines whether you connect sexually through your body (Gut Types 8, 9, 1), emotions (Heart Types 2, 3, 4), or mind (Head Types 5, 6, 7). Through real couple stories like Sarah & Mike's breakthrough from "mismatched libidos" to deep connection, you'll understand why Type 8s show love through intensity, how Type 2s can balance giving

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17:04

Initiation Styles: How Each Type Starts the Dance of...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/13

Discover the secret language of sexual initiation in marriage through the Enneagram! In this groundbreaking episode, marriage coach Christa explores how each of the nine personality types initiates intimacy in completely different ways - and why misreading these signals creates disconnection in the bedroom. Learn about the three distinct initiation styles: Direct Initiators (Types 8, 3, 7) who pursue with confidence and clarity, Subtle Signalers (Types 2, 6, 9) who create atmosphere and gentle

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21:35

The Pursuit of Happiness Together: Building Joy in...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/08

What if the secret to a happy marriage isn't finding the right person, but creating the right conditions for joy to flourish together? In this uplifting episode, discover why happiness in marriage is less about constant bliss and more about intentional practices that build lasting joy. Learn the difference between fleeting pleasure and sustainable happiness, explore the five pillars of marital joy (shared gratitude, playful connection, meaningful rituals, growth mindset, and service together), and

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38:00

When Looking Within Becomes Problematic: Gazing at...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/06

Tired of the mental exhaustion that comes from constantly wondering what others think of you? In this episode, bestselling author and pastor Sharon Hodde Miller, Enneagram 7 (7-3 pairing) reveals why examining our life without just gazing inward, but also up at God and outwardly to others can also help us to break free from the self-focused scripts that keep us trapped in insecurity. Although some Enneagram patterns fuel self-preoccupation, others fuel giving in excess so today we talk candidly for

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15:45

Breaking Chains: Independence from Old Marriage Patterns

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/07/01

Sometimes the most powerful chains in marriage are the ones we can't see. In this transformative episode, discover how to identify and break free from the four invisible patterns that keep couples stuck: the Scorekeeper Chain (mental tallies and resentment), the Mind-Reading Chain (expecting partners to anticipate needs), the Perfection Chain (redoing your partner's efforts), or any past-pattern fun/blindly following family-of-origin habits. Through real couple success stories and practical tools,

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41:38

What Tolkien's Middle Earth Teach Us About...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/30

What can hobbits, elves, and the wisdom of Middle-earth teach us about relationships? In this special conversation, Christa sits down with Philip Nation, publisher at Thomas Nelson and lifelong Tolkien enthusiast, to explore the profound relationship wisdom hidden within J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved stories. From the faithful friendship of Sam and Frodo to Tolkien's own enduring relationships with family and friends, this episode uncovers timeless principles for building lasting connections. Philip

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14:49

Masculine Strength, Feminine Strength: What Your...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/25

Here in this E + M mini, Christa explores the concepts of masculinity and femininity, as well as the tendency of certain types to lean toward different qualities, and how understanding this can transform your marriage dynamics. Learn which qualities come naturally to your type, which ones you might need to develop, and how accessing both strength and tenderness both offers us more resilient, balanced partnerships. Whether you're a Type 8 learning vulnerable collaboration or a Type 2 developing

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47:41

The Allender Center's Rachael Clinton Chen, 2: Hope...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/23

Join Christa for a crucial conversation with Rachel Clinton Chen, MDiv and faculty at The Allender Center, about spiritual abuse and its unique impact on marriages. Rachel brings both professional expertise and Type 2 heart-centered wisdom to this difficult but necessary topic.Discover how spiritual abuse differs from general church hurt, the specific challenges it creates for couples when one spouse's faith is shaken while the other's remains intact, and how partners can support each other's

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42:44

From The Chosen to Family Films: Nathan & D'Lytha...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/18

Join us for an inspiring conversation with filmmakers Nathan (Type 4) and D'Lytha (Type 5) Myers as they share their unique journey of marriage, parenting, and creating meaningful entertainment together. Nathan, known for his work on The Chosen and now running Grafted Studios, brings passionate creativity, while D'Lytha offers thoughtful wisdom. Together, they've created the award-winning film "Aria Appleton Shines," which tackles technology's impact on children and parental authority through the

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44:37

Tenth Avenue North’s Mike Donehey, Type 4: Bringing...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/16

What does it mean to bring light to the darkest seasons of life and faith? In this deeply moving post-Father’s Day episode, Mike Donehey, lead singer of the reunited Tenth Avenue North, shares the heart behind their new album “Learning to Trust.” As a social Type 4 married to a Type 2, Mike demonstrates the courage to go to those dark feelings, sit with them, and grapple with them honestly—both in his music and his marriage. The album, which explores “the midnight hour in a person’s faith,” was born

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14:42

When Emotions Are High: How to Self-Soothe in...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/11

When emotions run high in relationships, knowing how to self-soothe can make the difference between connection and disconnection. In this practical mini-episode, we explore a few way each instinctual variant, Self-Preservation, Social, and Sexual/One-to-One, approaches calming when feelings are intense. We also break down a bit further to designate heart types of each instinctual variant needing emotional safety, head types seeking mental clarity, and body types requiring physical grounding. In this

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57:06

Stories In Our Struggles: Terry Real's RLT Approach...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/09

What if the key to a stronger marriage isn't avoiding conflict, but learning to dig in and work through difficult moments? In this practical episode, marriage therapist and relational life therapist Zach Brittle, 8 brings over a decade of professional wisdom combined with personal insights from his Type 8-Type 2 marriage. Host of the popular Marriage Therapy Radio Podcast, Zach shares his gifted perspective on the stories that often lie beneath our relationship struggles and offers Terry Real's RLT

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54:20

The Unfiltered Truth About Aging and Advocacy with...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/04

What does it mean to age with strength and wisdom? In this powerful episode, Kathleen Henderson, 8 (8-9 pairing) shares her honest journey and OR nursing background to help others through health challenges, empowering you to use your voice and your spouse through the seasons through health challenges and through the evolution of marriage in later seasons of life. As a Type 8 married to a Type 9 with adult children, Kathleen opens up about self-advocacy in healthcare, life, and work settings,

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54:05

The Beautiful Home Reset: Refining Your Spaces...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/06/02

As we step into a summer of refinement here at Enneagram and Marriage, what better time to focus on creating homes that truly work for our families? In this insightful episode, interior design and home organization expert and author Whitney English, Type 4 (4-9 pairing) shares her room-by-room approach to creating spaces that are both beautiful and functional. Whitney believes that anyone can live a beautiful life, that "if you're real you can't be ugly," and that everyone is creative—some of us

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28:02

AI in Your Marriage: For Better or for Worse

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/05/28

Is artificial intelligence becoming the third party in your marriage? In this timely episode, we explore the growing trend of couples turning to AI for relationship advice, planning, and emotional processing. Based on survey data from real couples, Christa unpacks three major benefits AI brings to marriage—from vacation planning to communication tools—and three significant concerns about emotional bypassing, digital intimacy, and false authority. Drawing from relationship research and real-world

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50:09

Special: Author Kristen Strong (2-5 Pairing) on...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/05/26

In this special Memorial Day episode, Enneagram Type 2 Kristen Strong shares her powerful journey as a social Enneagram 2 giver and also military wife who spent two decades moving across the world, constantly rebuilding friendships and community. Author of "Desperate Woman Seeks Friends," Kristen offers vulnerable insights into the acute loneliness facing all of us in the busy culture of today and practical wisdom for anyone struggling to make meaningful connections through busyness, loneliness,

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28:47

To Wholly Love Someone: The Healthy Practices We...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/05/21

What does it truly mean to love someone with your whole being? In this transformative episode, we explore the essential practices needed to move beyond surface-level connection into profound, soul-nourishing love. Drawing from both Enneagram wisdom and practical relationship insights, we unpack how your personality type influences your capacity for love, and offer compassionate strategies for breaking through the childhood patterns and defense mechanisms that limit your ability to love completely

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54:06

Embracing Adventure & Partnership in Marriage...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/05/19

Influencer and Coach (Enneagram & Coaching) Hillary McCaskey, 9w8 joins Christa to explore how her Enneagram type shapes her marriage to an 8. Together they discuss how Hillary's 972 Tritype influences her ability to support her Type 8 husband's dreams while finding her own voice—culminating in both a healthier and more attuned marriage as well as their bold decision to embrace a comfortable life on the road as the traveling duo @VanKaskeys on YouTube. Hillary also shares her powerful journey

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25:01

Enneagram Wing Influence: Understanding Subtle...

Enneagram and Marriage ·

2025/05/14

Christa takes you on a journey through the subtle influences of Enneagram wings in marriage relationships. In this illuminating episode, she explores how our wing tendencies can sometimes take over our interactions with our spouse without us even realizing it. From the silent withdrawal of a 1w9 to the stubborn resistance of a 9w8, Christa breaks down real examples of how each type's wings manifest in marriage - both helping and hindering connection. Discover practical strategies for finding balance

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