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PODCAST

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

Kenneth Wilgus, Cynthia Yanof

A weekly podcast on parenting teens and launching them into the world. Hosted by Cynthia Yanof with Dr. Ken Wilgus, author of the book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You."

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

00:16:06

Episode 197: When Your Teenager Is Out of Control

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2025/01/14

Today we answer a listener question about dealing with a teenager who doesn't follow parents' rules and seem unfazed by any consequences parents give. Is this common? What about parents who "give up" on their teenager but let them live at home? Dr. Ken makes it clear that this is not a common problem and should be evaluated. Also, we talk about common reasons these situations occur.You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or

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00:26:48

Episode 196: How to Have a Great Spring with Your...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2025/01/07

Now that we've reached the spring of 2025, it's time to review the best ways to finish out with a high school senior. Even the most dedicated "Feeding The Mouth..." parent can struggle with these last months of their kid's adolescent life. Today we talk about how a parent can be most effective in helping a high school senior with preparation for college, trade school or whatever path their young adult child will taking after high school. Being effective means clearly and continually announcing the

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00:17:56

Episode 195: The Fire and the Knife - Lessons From...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/12/17

Today we discuss one of the most unusual chapters in any parenting book. In the new edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" Dr. Ken includes a chapter titled "The Fire and the Knife - Lessons From Father Abraham." This is really a challenge for parents who are Christians or are practicing Jews at least. For parents who are serious about their faith, there can come points in the life of raising children that we are challenged with the incredibly hard choice, "who is more important to you, God

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00:25:24

Episode 194: The Pros and Cons of Self-Awareness

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/12/10

Adolescents are more focused on their inner lives than ever before. But is this always a good thing? Jessica and Dr. Ken discuss yet another new chapter in the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." It's not enough to encourage teens to know their own feelings. This focus needs to be balanced with genuine concern for others. When your teenager tells you she's depressed or that he's anxious, is there ever a time to minimize or even ignore their complaints. Today we take on these and

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00:21:38

Episode 193: Keeping Marriage Alive When Your...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/12/03

When parents are busy raising children, a good marriage can seem like a luxury that they just don't have time for. Jessica and Dr. Ken argue that a good marriage is an essential part of raising healthy teens. As "Feeding The Mouth" parents know, adolescents need to be shown a path to their own emotional support and well-being. Marriage is not only essential for parents' emotional support but also important for you kids to see. How do parents deal with differences in parenting? We answer these and

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00:18:27

Episode 192: Homeschooling and Teenagers

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/11/26

With the second edition of the "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" book, today we discuss the tricky balance of homeschooling adolescents. Homeschool families have changed significantly over the past few years and is a more popular choice than ever. Dr. Ken reminds parents of the important issue of "who's in control here?" in dealing with arguing teens. What circumstances are good to start homeschooling a teenager and which conditions are bad for that same choice? We cover these and other aspects of

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00:28:14

Episode 191: Teenagers and Grandparents

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/11/19

Grandparents are often playing a larger part in the lives of their grandchildren than in the past. Most grandparents are popular with their grandkids when they're young, but what about during the teenage years? Today we discuss how understanding "Feeding The Mouth" principles can improve a grandparent's relationship with teenage grandchildren. Not surprisingly, Dr. Ken recommends being careful to respect your grandkids' parents (your own kids) even if you disagree with their parenting. What should a

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00:23:40

Episode 190: Adult Children Living at Home

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/11/12

There are many circumstances when adult children need to live at home. Some parents think Planned Emancipation means that's a bad thing. It isn't. Today we discuss the advantages and pitfalls of adult kids at home. What should parents pay for? What do you do when your adult kid doesn't help out around the house? Is it a good thing when parents and their adult kids become each other's best friend? We answer these and other important questions. Spoiler alert: It's not THAT an adult child is living in

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00:20:14

Episode 189: Adoption, Foster Care and Teenagers

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/11/05

Today Jessica and Dr. Ken take on the issues related to teenagers who are adopted or are in foster care. Adolescence often brings up issues of identity and origin stories that can be upsetting to parents who have poured themselves into the lives of their teenagers. Dr. Ken suggests that adoptive and foster parents focus more on Planned Emancipation goals even when there's a strong impulse to slow this process down. We also focus on realistic goals that adoptive parents can maintain in order to fully

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00:24:30

Episode 188: Great Communication With Teenagers

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/10/29

What does great communication with teens really look like and how can parents achieve that? Dr. Ken and Jessica outline the aspects of the parent-teen relationship that usually cause trouble in communication (spoiler alert: control battles). Also we discuss the more nuanced issue of what great communication with adolescents should really look like. Should parents really have the goal of being so close to their adolescents that "we talk about everything"? Are there even times when a parent should

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00:22:17

Episode 187: When Planned Emancipation Doesn't Work

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/10/22

Parents some times complain that they "tried" planned emancipation and it "didn't work." Today we talk about the common reasons for planned emancipation not seeming to have the impact parents expected. This is all covered in the new edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! podcast@feedingthemouth.com Music provided by the great John David Kent

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00:27:56

Episode 186: Planned Emancipation - Second Edition

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/10/15

As we prepare for the release of the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about the power of planned emancipation. This method is often mistaken for the practice of rewarding children's good behavior with more privileges. Planned emancipation, by contrast, recognizes the greater freedom that comes with just getting older. Parents who fearfully try to hang on to control end up weakening their influence on their adolescents. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book

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00:17:41

Episode 185: Teaching Parents To Release The Burden...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/10/08

In the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Dr. Ken explains why he added an entire chapter on the issue of burdened parents. We discuss the difficulty of providing information for parents while avoiding the appearance of having an "inside scoop" to guarantee happy, successful teenagers. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! podcast@feedingthemouth.com Music provided by

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00:20:18

Episode 184: Refocusing On Individuation - The Main...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/10/01

We're getting ready for the release of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" second edition. This gives Jessica and Dr. Ken the chance to clarify the most important themes that are unique to this approach to parenting adolescents. Today we review individuation which is the most important need that adolescents have by far. This need is so important that Dr. Ken even worries that if your teen doesn't seem to be pushing for autonomy that's not a good thing at all. Also, we take on common misperceptions

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00:25:38

Episode 183: When Parents Are Suffering

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/09/24

This was a tough episode. When parents are struggling with serious illness or other types of suffering, how should they handle their adolescent kids? Jessica talks about her own, recent diagnosis of multiple myeloma cancer and how it has impacted her adolescent and adult children. Dr. Ken talks about his wife's cancer battle 20 years ago when their children were young. There's a significant difference in how parents should deal with their kids when they are young vs. adolescents. In suffering,

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00:25:41

Episode 182: Inside Out 2

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/09/17

Today we talk about Pixar's big summer movie "Inside Out 2" in which the star, Riley, becomes a teenager. Although a really funny movie, Dr. Ken had a fair amount to complain about how we think about the inner life of teenagers. Jessica enjoyed it and so did her 13 year old daughter. Maybe Dr. Ken is just being a curmudgeon. You decide!You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from

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00:30:35

Episode 181: "The Anxious Generation"

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/09/10

Today we talk about Jonathan Haidt's new book, "The Anxious Generation." He is a social psychologist and co-author of the book "The Coddling Of The American Mind." This new book reviews massive amounts of research and delivers what Dr. Ken thinks is a "slam dunk" answer to the debate about whether smartphones are damaging to the lives of children and adolescents. We discuss the concerning data and how smartphones, social media and pornography have contributed to significant increases in adolescent

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00:35:16

Episode 180: The Big Announcement: The Revised and...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/09/03

The second edition of the "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" book will drop on November 5th! Dr. Ken finally finished the work of updating and expanding the Planned Emancipation message. Listeners of this podcast will recognize the new material covered in the book since they are many of the topics we talked about on this podcast over that past four seasons including:- anxiety and depression - ADHD, Autism-spectrum disorders and neurodiversity - brain science and trauma - sexuality and gender

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00:02:39

Episode 179: We're Going On Break Plus A BIG...

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/05/28

We're taking the summer off after our fourth season! Plus... Dr. Ken has a big announcement that will interest all "Feeding The Mouth" parents when we get back. See you in the fall!

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00:24:43

Episode 178: Bad Therapy - Part Two

Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens... ·

2024/05/21

Today we finish up our discussion of Abigail Shrier's book, "Bad Therapy." We take on her more wide-ranging critiques of psychotherapy's influence on schools and parenting. Are schools overstepping when they start monitoring the mental health of their students? When did parenting become a specialized technique for the psychologically trained few. When did parents lose confidence in simply raising their children the same way their parents raised them? We take on these and other issues related to

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