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PODCAST

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling Teen Before, During and After Treatment

Beth Hillman | Parent Coach for Parents of Struggling Teens

Your guide to parenting a struggling teen or young-adult, whether they’re home, transitioning home, or presently in treatment.Parents, say goodbye to exhausting confusion, overwhelm, panic and the unhelpful patterns that keep you and your family stuck. Learn how to develop healthy responses and set healthy boundaries with your teen instead of acting out of fear and anxiety.Experience the relationship-changing power of focusing on your own behavior instead of futile attempts to control your teen.Your

kids & family parenting

All Episodes

23:07

144. Parenting Without Enabling: How to Support...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/05/27

🔆 Small GROUP COACHING program starting June 11th, 2025 🔆 Sign up or learn more over at www.bethhillmancoaching.com/groups I hope to see you there! When your kid makes harmful or self-destructive choices, it's natural to want to step in, correct, and fix. But at some point, empathy might feel like enabling. How do we listen with compassion without sending the message that their behavior is okay? In this episode, Seth and I unpack the fear that being supportive might mean condoning poor

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45:08

143. Motivating Behavior Change in Teens & Young...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/05/20

🔆 Small GROUP COACHING program starting June 11th, 2025 🔆 Sign up or learn more over at www.bethhillmancoaching.com/groups I hope to see you there! When our kids struggle to make better choices, we often focus on offering consequences, creating a plan, and following through. It’s a natural instinct to try harder, create structure, and hold boundaries. But what often gets overlooked is the role that beliefs play in motivating behavior change, both our kids’ beliefs about themselves and our

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46:01

142. Feeling Used by Your Teen? How to Move Away from...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/05/13

“I do so much for them, and they don’t even notice”. Sounds like a familiar thought? Many parents of struggling teens or young adults feel used, taken for granted, or stuck in a dynamic where love feels more like a series of trades than a relationship. In this episode, I’m joined again by therapist Trevor Allen to unpack the tricky dynamic of transactional parenting and behavior: what it is, how it shows up, and most importantly, how to shift out of it. From “I let you go out, so you should ...

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34:33

141. What Are Your Expecting? - Navigating...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/05/06

It’s not your child’s job to live up to your expectations. That might sound harsh, but it’s one of the most important truths I’ve had to learn as a parent, especially during the transition home after treatment. If you’re anything like me, you might be thinking: ‘But I don’t even have that many expectations!’ I used to think that too… I wasn’t asking for straight A’s or a high-powered career path. But the truth is, I had all sorts of hidden expectations: to be respected, to be liked, to have...

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29:51

140. Parenting a Teen vs a Young Adult: Nuanced...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/04/29

🌱 LIVE Online Workshop 'Resolve The Cycle of Conflict' 🌱 May 2nd & 16th, 2025 Sign up or learn more over at www.bethhillmancoaching.com/conflictworkshop I hope to see you there! There’s a distinct shift that happens when your teen becomes a young adult, and it’s not just about age. Whether your child is living at home, in college, or fresh out of treatment, the transition from parenting a teenager to parenting a young adult is one of the most nuanced and challenging shifts we make as

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47:07

139. How to Help Your Anxious Teen or Young Adult...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/04/22

🌱 LIVE Online Workshop 'Resolve The Cycle of Conflict' 🌱 May 2nd & 16th, 2025 Sign up or learn more over at www.bethhillmancoaching.com/conflictworkshop I hope to see you there! If your teen seems anxious, unmotivated, or constantly overwhelmed, there's often more going on beneath the surface than meets the eye. Teen anxiety is more common and more complex than many parents realize. Life coach for teens Monica Crnogorac brings both personal and professional insight on how to help your

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36:03

138. Life After Treatment: How Your Kid Can Find the...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/04/15

One of the most overlooked challenges after treatment? The loss of community. Teens and young adults often return home (or head off to college) and suddenly find themselves without the peer support they had in treatment, even though that kind of support, being seen and understood by someone who’s been through it too, can be one of the most powerful parts of the healing process. “Especially for young people, the need to belong is so important” - Ciara Fanlo Your child may be craving a sense ...

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19:14

137. How to Care Without Losing Yourself When Your...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/04/08

When your teen or young adult is struggling, it’s easy for everything else to fall away, including you. It’s a pattern we both see often: parents abandoning their own needs in the name of care, staying on high alert for the next crisis, and losing themselves in the process. I remember the desperation I felt when my son was struggling. I poured every ounce of my energy into trying to get him to choose something different. I ignored my emotional, mental, and physical needs, because I couldn’t ...

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24:12

136. Finding Balance While Shifting Parenting Patterns

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/04/01

When you're doing the work to grow as a parent, it's common to overcorrect. You recognize a pattern (maybe you tend to be explosive in conflict) so you swing to the opposite end and become overly passive. It feels like progress, but suddenly you're stuck in a new extreme. In this episode, Seth and I explore what we call the "pendulum swing" of behavior and how both parents and teens experience this while trying to make real, lasting change. Whether it’s yelling one day and withdrawing the ne...

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35:25

135. Challenging the Stories We Tell Ourselves About...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/03/25

We all have an inner dialogue. But it's too easy to take the stories we tell ourselves, about our kids, our parenting, and what’s going to happen next, to start feeling like facts. In this episode, Seth and I explore how our narratives can quietly shape our reactions, expectations, and ultimately our relationships with our teens and young adults. “We have to remember that almost everything we think is a narrative. … All narratives can change” - Beth Hillman When a child returns home from tr...

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39:09

134. Helping Your (ADHD) Teen Manage Time & Build...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/03/18

If your teen or young adult constantly underestimates how long things take or insists they “have plenty of time” when they don’t, welcome to the club! This common struggle is called time dysmorphia, and it’s more than just procrastination or laziness. It actually has to do with executive functioning. In this episode, executive function coach Chrissy Nichols joins me to explain what time dysmorphia is, why it happens, and how parents can help their kids manage it without frustration or shame....

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31:04

133. When to Step Back: The Power of Disengaging for...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/03/11

Do you ever find yourself stuck in a conversation that’s going in circles, desperately trying to find a resolution? It’s natural to want closure, but sometimes, the healthiest thing you can do is step back. In this episode, Seth and I explore how disengaging can actually strengthen healthy communication with your teen rather than shutting it down. When emotions run high, it can be difficult to recognize when a conversation is no longer productive. As parents, we often enter discussions with ...

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27:03

132. Why Isn’t Your Love Enough to Make Your...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/03/04

It’s devastating to watch your teen struggle and feel like nothing you do is making a difference. You love them more than anything, yet your support, advice, and care don’t seem to make a difference. If you’ve ever thought, Why isn’t my love enough to help my struggling teen?, you’re not alone. In this episode, Seth and I unpack why struggling teens may reject the love and support they need and what parents can do with this knowledge. Many parents take their child’s maladaptive behaviors p...

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35:45

131. Navigating Home Visits: How to Approach Your...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/02/25

Home visits after treatment can be both exciting and nerve-wracking for everyone involved. It’s a time filled with hope, but with that hope often comes fear: fear of falling back into old patterns, fear of things going wrong, and fear of not knowing what to expect. In this episode, Seth and I unpack what makes home visits so important, why they can feel overwhelming, and how to navigate them with intention. Every family member brings their own expectations to a home visit. As a parent, you m...

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29:37

130. From Sibling to Mentor: The Sibling’s...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/02/18

When a child struggles, the entire family feels it. But the sibling’s experience is often overlooked. Today, we get to hear the sibling’s perspective as Ethan Gordon, a mentor for struggling kids, teens, and young adults, joins me to share his unique perspective as both a sibling and a social worker. Drawing from his personal loss of a brother to drug addiction, Ethan offers insights into his unique experiences as a sibling of a struggling teen. Navigating how much to share with siblings whe...

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39:40

129. Shifting to Healthy Communication with Your Teen...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/02/11

Healthy communication is the foundation of strong relationships. But when emotions run high, it’s easy to fall into unhelpful patterns. In this episode, trauma therapist Sarah Allen joins me to explore how communication styles shape family dynamics and what it takes to shift toward healthier, more assertive communication with your struggling teen. If you’ve ever felt stuck between being too passive or too controlling in conversations with your teen, you’re not alone. Many parents default to ...

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22:35

128. Parenting an Overwhelmed Teen (And Dealing With...

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/02/04

When life feels like too much, it’s easy to get caught in the spiral of overwhelm. And let’s face it, whether it’s your teen or yourself as a parent, overwhelm is something we all face from time to time. In this episode, we dive into how to support your teen through these challenging moments while also learning to manage your own as a parent. Overwhelm can show up in many ways, emotional shutdowns, conflict, exhaustion, or frustration, all stemming from the pressure of unmet expectations. Wh...

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36:55

127. When Nothing Seems to Work for Your Struggling Teen

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/01/28

What do you do when you’ve tried everything? Your teen has been to wilderness programs, therapeutic boarding schools, partial hospitalization programs, and more—and yet, the struggles persist. The behaviors, the fears, the maladaptive patterns, they all return in some way or form when your teen comes back home. What now?In this episode, I’m joined again by the incredible Ciara Fanlo, a former “troubled teen” turned mentor and coach for struggling teens. Together, we delve into the feelings of...

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26:47

126. Will My Work as a Parent Ever Be Done?

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/01/21

Parenting often feels like one of the most rewarding yet unrelenting journeys. There’s no clocking out, even after major milestones are achieved. In this episode, Seth joins me to explore what it means to keep showing up as a parent, even when the work feels never-ending.I reflect on how my son has grown far beyond his time as “my wilderness kid.” Yet, just the other day, we shared an interaction that reminded me our journey is still ongoing. It’s a process of meeting each other with empathy,...

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17:04

125. Strengthening Relationships Through Conflict

Parenting Post-Wilderness: Parenting a Struggling... ·

2025/01/14

Sometimes the shame around my actions feels so heavy and I feel like I’ve failed as a parent. Sounds familiar? In this deeply personal episode, I open up about one of the most painful regrets I’ve had as a parent. A moment I carried shame around for years. It was a time when I was overwhelmed with emotions and lacked the tools I have now, leading to choices I’m not proud of.At the time, I was convinced my struggling teen was doing everything “wrong” and my attempts to “fix” him only deepened ...

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185 results

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