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PODCAST

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40

Stephanie McLaughlin

Sometime around age 40 (+/-) you might start feeling like some part of your life no longer fits and you don"t know what to do about it. It could be at work or at home - or simply inside of you. You might be asking questions like, "How did I get here?" Or, "Is this all there is?" "Is this what I"ve been working so hard for?" Or, "Why aren"t I happier?" Growing out of her own experience turning 40, Stephanie McLaughlin became captivated by the big “four oh,” and how people handle the milestone

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All Episodes

01:01:45

Turning 40 and Going on 50 First Dates

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/07/16

Julie Hutsell-Starling was in her mid 30s and in the middle of a toxic relationship she couldn’t extract herself from when she heard a song that changed everything. It was the catalyst to finally leave this relationship and start the healing process. When she started dating again, she was so clear on what she wanted that the dates were actually interviews. After roughly 50 first dates she met the man she would eventually marry. Now that she had found a wonderful, loving relationship, it ignited the

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01:17:07

Pod Swap with Family Twist

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/06/25

Corey Stulce from the Family Twist podcast hosts a special "pod swap" episode of the Forty Drinks podcast with guest Jordan Elizabeth Braxton. In this engaging conversation, Jordan shares the intimate and powerful story of her transition journey. From her early realizations and the challenges faced within a religious family to the life-changing moment of discovering she was intersex, Jordan opens up about her struggles and triumphs. She discusses the pivotal decision to transition, the impact on her

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01:07:50

Turning 40 and Changing the Things that Muck with...

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/06/18

In this week’s episode of Forty Drinks, Stephanie talks with Erik DeRosa about his profound midlife transition and struggle with mental health. Erik grew up with severe anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder, masking it under a facade for 25 years while pursuing a high-pressure career on Wall Street. At age 33, a dissociative episode forced him to confront his mental health issues and seek therapy. His life took a transformative turn when he discovered skiing, a passion that ultimately led him to

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01:09:46

Turning 40 and Embracing the Bare Minimum

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/06/12

In today’s episode, Jeff Glauser shares his transformative journey from feeling stuck and unfulfilled in his mid-thirties to finding purpose and stability in his forties. Coming from a background in sports journalism, Jeff struggled with imposter syndrome and missed opportunities. Faced with financial hardships and personal setbacks, including a bankruptcy and his marriage ending, Jeff sought a path to reinvention. Through establishing ten daily habits centered on self-improvement and

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55:34

Turning 40, Conquering Cancer and Planting Roots

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/06/07

In this episode of the Forty Drinks Podcast, Gregory Halpen discusses his transformative journey from a tumultuous youth to finding stability and purpose in midlife. Gregory shares his struggles with substance misuse, the allure and challenges of life in New York City, and a life-altering battle with cancer at age 46, which led him to reevaluate his life, ultimately grounding himself and pursuing his passion for the arts more seriously. Gregory's story is a vivid example of resilience and the power

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01:03:56

Turning 40 and Waking From the Fairy Tale

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/05/31

When she was 31, Laura Ballet met a man 11 years her junior that she would spend the next decade with. He acted mature for his age and she acted a little young, so they met in the middle on many things. The relationship was mostly wonderful, but she put blinders on to avoid the things she felt were missing. However, once she started asking herself the hard questions, she couldn’t deny that something important was missing for her. She chose to take a leap of faith and listen to the little voices

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01:00:43

Turning 40 and Kicking the Soul Sucking Job to the Curb

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/05/21

As a former "fat kid," Lauren Herskovic had deep seated insecurities that led her to choose professional roles that didn’t give her what she needed because she didn’t think she deserved it. She spent seven years as the COO of a startup where the founders made her feel like she was good at her job and dangled the carrot of the “big payoff,” but it came with severely compromised boundaries. Ultimately, she found her way from soul-sucking burnout to success and authenticity in the real estate industry

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53:37

Turning 40 and Ditching the Lying, Cheating Narcissist

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/05/09

As Ginny Priem approached 40, she was focused on her career and enjoying the life she had built for herself. Then she met “Chad,” who worked his way into her heart and home with his two kids. A year later she met a friend who presented her with evidence that “Chad” had been seeing someone else the whole time. One of the alleged instances occurred when Ginny knew she was overriding a sense that something was wrong. It was only after getting out of that relationship that she started to ask the hard

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01:09:49

Turning 40 and Peeling Back the Layers of the Onion

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/05/02

Sara Letorneau is a writer, editor, poet and writing coach who will turn 40 later this year. She grew up in a “normal” happy family in a working class suburb in Massachusetts where she was taught that the traditional life milestones would make her “happy:” go to college, get a job, find a boyfriend, get married and have kids. But we all know that it’s not that easy. Sara has made her way through some elements of the midlife Ick, in her job, her friendships and in her romantic relationships. And,

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40:44

Turning 40 and Leaving the Bureaucracy for Science...

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/04/23

David Hankins spent 20 years in the Army working in logistics. He retired at 42 and had to figure out what his next act was going to be. There would be stability to support his family, but he would also chase his dream of becoming a professional writer. Despite David’s midlife transition looking pretty smooth, there has been a lot of uncertainty. In both his search for a civilian job and his efforts to break into publishing, he’s heard a lot of no’s, or gotten no response at all. His approach to

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01:07:17

Turning 40 and Going from the Streets to Safety to...

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/04/17

Allison Doss has a multi-faceted midlife transition that took her through several harrowing phases. She moved to the “big city” after high school and was quickly recruited to become a stripper. She went from stripper to high-priced escort to homeless and drug addicted, prostituting to pay for her fix. At 40 she got into recovery but quickly replaced her pursuit of drugs with the pursuit of a man, who she ultimately married. That should be enough lessons for one person, but her husband came out to

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42:48

Turning 40 and Embracing Intimacy Over Sex

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/04/09

Karl Beckstrand was exposed to gay sex at age 8 by a male peer. Because of that experience at such a tender age, Karl developed a dysfunctional relationship with sex. He became hypersexual from that first encounter at age 8 until he was about 40, at which point he went to the other extreme and became a recluse for a decade. Here, he tells the story of how he learned to get his emotional needs met in a healthy way. Guest BioCollege media instructor Karl W. Beckstrand is the best-selling

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50:21

Turning 40 and Saying Yes for a Year

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/04/02

Joe Scales approached 40 wondering why he wasn’t happier. He had a job that paid well, two incredible kids and he had been married for 20 years. He wondered why he didn’t have “it” all figured out yet (when it seemed like everyone else did), which led him to questioning many of his decisions along the way. He realized that the problem was himself and his focus on questions that began with “why.” There were plenty of other questions that he could ask that might help him shake loose of his malaise,

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47:46

Turning 40 and Transitioning From Warrior to Civilian

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/03/26

John Lawyer spent more than a decade as a warrior in the Middle East and, upon his return to civilian life in the United States, struggled with his identity and how to engage with the world. He went from someone who was “important” in the desert - someone who directed where troops and airplanes went - to being just another person living in what he thought was a muted world that moved in slow motion. And then one night he woke up to a profound moment of clarity, some call it an awakening, that helped

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30:15

Transition vs. Change: Navigating the Midlife Transition

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/03/19

Welcome to Season 5 of the Forty Drinks Podcast. I’m kicking off the season with an exploration of transition versus change, which are entirely different things according to William Bridges, PhD in his best-selling book, Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes. Transition vs. Change: Navigating the Midlife TransitionStephanie McLaughlin kicks off season five of the Forty Drinks Podcast by exploring the concept of transition versus change, inspired by the best-selling book by William Bridges,

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01:08:04

Turning 40 and Rewriting My Story

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/02/28

Stephanie Rose checked off a huge number of major life events in her early 30s, in a bit of a whirlwind fashion. She met and married her husband, bought her first home, gave birth two her two kids, and experienced the death of her mom. Then, at 39, she started a business and realized she didn’t really have a frame of reference for who she was any more and felt like she needed to get to know herself better. So she used exercises from Julia Cameron’s The Artists’ Way and then developed some of her

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01:14:47

Turning 40 and Touched by an Angel

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/02/22

Vince Kramer ignored three major wake up calls in his 40s, before the Universe - or whatever you prefer to call it - finally got his attention. First, he narrowly missed piloting one of the United flights on 9/11. Then, he experienced a major financial setback due to United Airlines declaring bankruptcy. And, finally, his marriage ended and he realized he needed to stop ignoring these signs and figure out what was missing in his life. That’s when his journey of self discovery really began. Guest

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01:17:47

Turning 40 and Healing First Generation Wounds

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/02/13

Susie Castellanos Hansley is a first-generation Mexican American who was raised by her grandmother from the age of two after her mother died, along with her siblings and cousins. Susie found school was a refuge and something she was good at. She followed the school path straight through a Ph.D. and postdoctoral studies only to find that teaching didn’t suit her, which led to years of trying to find the right professional fit. She equated her value as a person with her ability to earn an income, so

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51:46

Turning 40 and Stop Making the Same Mistake

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/02/09

Birgitta Visser kept making the same mistake over and over again in her romantic relationships. She had an acute case of what she called “doormat syndrome,” which meant she didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but that meant she would compromise well beyond what was reasonable in her relationships. That left her “walking in her own shadow,” neglecting her own feelings and needs until she was the one who got hurt. The roots of this behavior lay in childhood experiences of abuse and loss and a

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44:42

Turning 40 and Facing your Stuff so you Don't have to...

The Big Four Oh: The Podcast About Turning 40 ·

2024/02/01

As mother-daughter relationships go, Renee says hers with her mom was pretty good, but she never felt like she had permission to be herself. When she was a girl and her mom would make a dress, she’d make a smaller one in the same style and pattern for Renee. Her mom liked bright colors and patterns and Renee would have preferred more unobtrusive clothes. Renee wanted to fit in but her mom wanted her to stand out. Renee says she often thought the first line of a book on her life would be : "When I

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