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PODCAST

Don"t Open This Podcast

Don"t Open This Podcast

Take a guided tour into terror as Mike and Tim bring fans new and old into the world of horror every 2nd and 4th Monday! You"ve been warned. Don"t open this podcast!

tv & film

All Episodes

01:26:48

Pitch It Or Ditch It

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2024/01/22

To kick off 2024, Mike and Tim are cracking open the crypt of cinematic treasures and breathing new life into those forgotten films that never got their sequel! From eerie autopsy rooms and otherworldly invasions to twisted small towns and superpowered nightmares, we're stitching together sequel plots that will make your skin crawl and your imagination soar. But beware, dear listeners, not all tales are meant to be retold! You hold the power to decide which sequels should be unleashed upon the

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03:33:21

Year In Fear 2023

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/12/25

A very scary Christmas to all our listeners! As we close the books on 2023 here at Don't Open This Podcast HQ, we reflect on all the horror packed into this year with an episode absolutely overflowing with terror! Mike and Tim delve into some thoughts on almost 50 films this year with everything from rambunctious redcaps to flesh-eating fairies so get ready for a King-Sized (King of the monsters, that is) episode! Did we miss some of your favorites? Let us know as we hunt down those stragglers to

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01:57:46

Anatomy Of A Franchise - Silent Night Deadly Night...

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/12/11

Tis the season, dear listeners! That time of year when the stockings are hung by the chimney with scare, and the slay bells are ringing! So naturally Mike and Tim return to their Anatomy Of A Franchise series with an extra dose of Ho! Ho! HOMICIDE! to delve into the whackiest Christmas horror franchise ever: "Silent Night Deadly Night!" Is that not enough? Then you can open one gift early as Tim, Mike, and Kristen carve up a Spotlight On Fright for Eli Roth's Thanksgiving! So, settle

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01:29:38

Coffin Talk Vol 2 (with Adrian Correia)

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/11/27

The Coffin Talk continues as Mike, Tim, and Adrian solider on into Part 2 of their freeform discussion on everything from modern objective horror criticism and effective visual storytelling scares to their favorite kills and some behind-the-scenes on your horror favorites. Also, listen in as Mike and Tim pick Adrian's brain on anything he can share from his work as cinematographer for the closing chapter in the Rick/Michonne story in The Walking Dead: The Ones Who Live before it releases in

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01:46:46

Coffin Talk Vol 1 (with Adrian Correia)

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/11/13

October may be over, but the party hasn't stopped at Don't Open This Podcast! Mike and Tim record live from Don't Open This Podcast HQ on Halloween night as they welcome on their dear friend and fellow horror-head, cinematographer Adrian Correia to wind down the party with some hair-raising roundtable discussion! There is something for everyone as the crew tackle the anatomy of a good jump scare, what makes a great horror scene, Tobe Hooper's masterful handling of Texas Chainsaw 1

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02:30:55

The DOTP Halloween Countdown!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/10/23

STEP RIGHT UP, BOILS & GHOULS! IT’S TIME FOR A SPINE-CHILLING CORNUCOPIA OF FRIGHT! It’s that special time of year, when your two devoted hosts push themselves into full blown horror overdrive! This week Mike and Tim unleash 10 rabid flicks tailored to each day of the week leading up to an extra special double feature on the night of Halloween! From Dunwich Horrors and Haunted Carnivals to Waterfront Slashers and Body Snatchers! So don your favorite latex mask & a fistful of candy corn

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02:15:09

WTF Did We Just Watch?!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/10/09

Don't Open This Podcast is about to get a little bizarre as Mike and Tim dive headfirst into bonkers territory with 6 head-scratching, eyebrow raising oddities! Stops along this crazy train include a devil child rigged basketball game in THE VISITOR, all the screaming gunfire you could want in HOWLING 2, the meta-horror clip-cinema massacre that is CAT IN THE BRAIN, a chimpanzee searching for supernatural vengeance in PHENOMENA, and a family that redefines being close in SOCIETY before we roll

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02:06:52

A Comedy Of Terrors!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/09/25

Greetings Boils & Ghouls! Your trusted horror hosts Mike & Tim return to tickle your funny bone this week…before ripping it from your tender flesh! That’s right kiddies, Episode #39 “A Comedy of Terrors” serves up 6 heaping platters of Giggles and Gore! Horror Comedies of such malignant magnitude that you’ll literally be splitting at your sides with maniacal laughter! The boys team up with TUCKER & DALE in a futile attempt to defeat Evil, sit in on a self-help group to aid RENFIELD in

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02:15:26

The Return Of Remakes That Don't Suck

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/09/11

Just when you thought it was safe to write off remakes, it's The Return Of Remakes That Don't Suck! On this episode, Mike and Tim dive into iconic horror remakes that defy the odds and breathe new life into classic terrors. From the genetic nightmares of "The Fly" to the haunting allure of "Suspiria," we're exploring films that not only pay homage but elevate the originals. So grab your popcorn and join us on another thrilling episode of Don't Open This Podcast, where remakes are anything but a

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02:17:34

Unsung Horror Vol. 4: Stephen King Rules!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/08/28

The Summer of Fear is over! Mike and Tim have survived Camp Carnage and are back to bring you your regularly scheduled programming. This week they're resurrecting the fan-favorite Unsung Horror series with a King-Sized episode for you, Stephen King that is! From high-flying vampires and incestuous felines to evil entities and malicious machines, this episode is jam-packed to keep you running during the graveyard shift! So dim the lights and tune in because we're gonna scare the hell out of

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01:50:45

Summer of Fear: Mailbag of Doom!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/08/14

IT'S ALL LED UP TO THIS! The Summer of Fear culminates in the first annual MAILBAG OF DOOM! As Mike, Tim, and a newly-deprogrammed Kristen wait out the night at Camp Carnage, they return 20 of your most terrifying listener questions with their most horrifying answers! From final girls and hot takes to mystery callers and good old fashioned horror detective work, this one's got it all! So, park your rafts and settle in for the escape from Camp Carnage on DON'T OPEN THIS PODCAST!

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01:41:55

Summer of Fear: That's All Folk-Horror!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/07/24

THE SUMMER OF FEAR MARCHES ON! Your unflappable hosts continue their journey through the perilous waters of Camp Carnage as they raft towards danger in hopes of rescuing their resident fact girl, Kristen! Using their time wisely as they drift downstream, the guys get into a deep discussion of all the cult-y, devilish goodness that the Folk Horror genre has to offer. From demonic claws and deadly cults to skewed mythologies and harrowing hit men; this episode has it all! So, step FORTH my child,

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01:41:25

Summer of Fear: Tides of Terror!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/07/10

ATTENTION CAMPERS! With the sun setting on another day at "Camp Carnage", your fearless “Guides through the Ghastly”: Mike, Tim, & Kristen, invite you to dive into the chilling depths of our "Summer of Fear Marathon" with PART 2: "TIDES OF TERROR"! As the camp descends further into chaos, we're turning our gaze seaward to explore the murky world of Aquatic Horror from it’s very floor to just below the surface, plumbing the depths in search of brine-soaked

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01:50:18

Summer of Fear: Gimme S'more Slashers!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/06/26

Attention Campers! With the Summer now here, your trusted counselors of the macabre: Mike, Tim, and Kristen welcome you to “Camp Carnage” for the start of our “Summer of Fear Marathon” where the nights run hot and the blood runs cold! So grab a s'more and gather around the fire as we kick off part 1 with “GIMME S'MORE SLASHERS “ visiting all the best in Summer slaughter. From backwoods maniacs , possessed axe murderers, and time jumping satires to classic lakeside stalkers and teenage tales of

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02:45:59

Death By Numbers Vol 1

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/06/12

Your days are numbered, dear listeners! Or at least these titles are because this week, Mike & Tim channel their inner morbid mathematicians, assembling an equation of fear that only the most daring of listeners should attempt to solve! Six films that span decades & mine terror from the deepest recess of the horror genre! Initiate yourself with the old fashioned chills that ONE DARK NIGHT has to offer before checking your shredded nerves into room 1408 at the infamous Dolphin Hotel. The

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02:00:53

Anthology of Anthologies Vol 1

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/05/22

GREETINGS KIDDIES!!! You have stumbled upon a rare treat indeed. Join your ghoulish guides Morbid Michael and Terrible Timothy as they take you on a putridly pun filled journey into cinematic fear! Brushing the cobwebs from their microphones, they peel back the bloody curtain, granting YOU full access to not ONE, not TWO, but THREE collections of horror to chill your marrow filled bones! This week, Mike and Tim are tiptoeing into the decrepit crypts of 1972, as the guys exhume the ghoulishly

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02:17:38

High Rise Horror Vol 1

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/05/08

This week Mike and Tim take you on a pulse pounding tour up six flights of fear - into towering terror like you’ve never imagined! Grab your scarf as the guys head to Canada with an early Cronenberg offering guaranteed to give you SHIVERS, then it’s off to a bloodstained dystopia packed to the gills with action, murder, & DREDD. Attempting to catch their breath, your guides fly over to Germany for an Italian splatter-fest of epic proportions with DEMONS 2. Next stop is Barcelona, Spain to

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02:12:31

Dreamworlds & Hellscapes

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/04/24

This week Mike & Tim venture to strange, uncharted territory! Descending first down “Jacob’s Ladder”, the guys also attempt to deconstruct plans to a carnal “House that Jack Built”. A quick diversion to the reality bending world of “Before I Wake” leads them to a meeting with Nic Cage as they set out to avenge the untimely death of his dearest “Mandy”. Spiraling further down this rabbit hole, your hosts narrowly escape the darkness held at bay only by “The Sentinel” as they finally drift

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01:28:39

Mall Mayhem: Shop Till You Drop...Dead!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/04/10

ATTENTION PODCAST LISTENERS!!! Welcome to EPISODE 28 : Mall Mayhem! Join Mike & Tim as they fire up Mom’s Station Wagon & take you on a blood soaked tour of that All American Institution- The Mall!!! Our first stop will be Los Angeles for some binge shopping with the “Night of the Comet” crew, then a pit stop in a small town plagued by “The Mist”. If we manage to make it out of there, it’s off to the food court to meet up with a lovelorn maniac in “Phantom of the Mall” before finishing our

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02:08:00

Fresh Cuts: Five Servings Of Fear!

Don"t Open This Podcast ·

2023/03/27

Tim and Mike serve up a five course feast of fear, including a couple "listener recommended" leftovers from 2022! The piping hot main course features some very recent 2023 releases that are still tearing up theaters along with several others currently haunting streaming sites. Just be sure to save some room for coffee, dessert, and bloodshed as the guys deliver a Spoiler Filled Extra segment on Scream 6 at the VERY END of this otherwise SPOILER FREE episode.

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