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PODCAST

The Opinion Machine???

You definitely need another opinion, and this is it.

society & culture philosophy

All Episodes

00:26:12

#142 Won’t Stop Believin’!

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/28

Wherein I ramble about belief and the resulting disappointment when it is placed in others who will inevitably let you down.I make excuses and defend the innocent people who ended up on Epstein’s island and bet that, because of them and the innocent victims, many people are going to be bummed when files aren’t fully revealed.I miss lots of important details which will likely result in rebuke from some of holier than thous.No refunds.

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00:38:18

#141 AI Is Glorified Slutty Fake Librarian

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/12

Wherein I compare AI to a lifeless spell checker programmed to be a deceptive half obedient librarian prostitute who wants to give you almost everything you want so that you never get what you actually need.It is also useful if you know how to use it & never believe that it cares about you.It’s programed to make you think it cares about you like a friend, laughing at your jokes, even if it doesn’t understand them.It doesn’t care.It won’t care.It can’t care.Ever.No refunds.

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00:38:09

#140 Naked Kanye & The $19m Swastika

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/11

Wherein I compare parts of my life to Kanye & his Super Bowl swastika t-shirt stunt by telling the story about the time I almost got arrested for taking pictures of a naked neighbor on The Golden Gate Bridge.Lots of bad words, ideas & dead naming.I defend other bad people & use the n-word when talking to my dog.What makes you so great?No refunds.

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00:29:51

#139 Cynicism & The “Good” Show

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/10

Wherein I argue that sitting in a tub, stewing in your own filth in the town square, holding a lantern, looking for an honest man, isn’t the virtuous criticism of society that you think it is.Spoiler: I’m describing the alleged origins of Cynicism.Yes, dogs are the best, you will never be as pure as a dog and Charlie’s Taco Shop creates far more happiness than your tub stunt.Aka you aren’t superior to actual doers, builders & those who stick their necks out.Please chill the fuck out.No

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00:36:31

#138 The OK Anti-Anti Declaration

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/09

Wherein I angrily rant & criticize so-called conservatives & libertarians who smugly refuse to acknowledge that they might be finally getting what they have been after because they built their fragile identities around being ANTI, which now leaves them in crisis as they cling to the last morsels of victimhood rather than admitting they might have been wrong by actually supporting anyone who might disappoint & embarrass them.It’s pathetic, obviously self serving, revealing, & counter

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00:22:22

#137 Voice Messages Are “Creepy”

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/09

Wherein I leave a long voice message responding to the retarded claim that voice messages are inherently creepy while making a lukewarm argument that text messages are actually creepy if you think about it.Nowhere in meatworld would you ever mistake a 57 year old man for a 15 year old girl. That only happens in text.Fuckin weird.Some of yall are going to be offended, thinking I’m talking about you.I will neither confirm nor deny.No refunds.

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00:26:06

#136 Fake Laughter is Satanic

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/02/08

Wherein I paint myself into a corner by setting a policy to unfriend anyone who uses a laugh react to a serious good faith argument only to have a colleague of 35 years unknowingly test that policy less than 5 minutes after posting it.Spoiler: I reluctantly unfriended him.Religious terminology is used mostly to piss off arrogant atheists who look down their nose at religious people.Good versus evil is legitimate no matter your level of religiosity.No refunds.

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00:27:08

#133 The Lone Individualist

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/01/25

Wherein I sloppily propose that collectivism needn’t be seen as the enemy of individualism & vice versa by revealing stupid fashion choices, pink zebras, & peaceful loads of napping baby animals.Everything is fine when your belly is full and your feet are warm. Pretend you’re my therapist if you want. No refunds.

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00:30:15

#132 The Not So Amazing Polly

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/01/23

Wherein I boast & brag about getting blocked by one of the many witches of the new world while making a case for why AI & mRNA technologies should be allowed to proceed in a relatively unfucked with manner so long as Americans keep their guns. It doesn’t bother me that you don’t listen to these. I don’t listen to your podcast either. Most of yall are weirdos anyway 😉 No refunds.

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00:25:48

#131 Imaginary Bullshirt

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/01/21

Wherein I preach about focusing on reality rather than the imaginary BS that credentialed charlatans want you to believe. Plenty of irony and hypocrisy. Too much throat clearing. I don’t edit. No refunds.

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00:31:13

#130 Weaponized Incompetence

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2025/01/11

Wherein I launch into a frothy unhinged rant about the fires, friend who are possibly Feds and demand that every person be held accountable even if they are retarded and can’t aim a space laser.None of this should be construed as advice or an incitement to violence. No way. DO NOT PULL OUT KAREN BASS’ FINGERNAILS. Spittle detected. No refunds.

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00:24:43

#112 The Morning Show

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2020/01/07

How Allegedly Powerful Women Are Absolutely Crushed By Sex In The Workplace, Powerful Men Are Easily Crushed By Bad Dates & Apple Does It’s Best To Pretend They Are Different.Aka: Feigning Powerlessness Is Insulting To Everyone. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:21:37

#111 Mean Sisters

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/30

Full Mean Sisters, Half Mean Sisters, & Step Mean Sisters. Aka: Relax, This Probably Isn’t About You, But It Might Be. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:21:35

#110 Almost Catastrophic Christmas Eve Eve

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/26

How Catastrophic Thinking Wastes Everyone’s Time, Sucks Up All Your Energy & Never Solves A Single Problem Aka: Use That Energy To Actually Fix Shit --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:21:10

#109 The Trouble With Certainty

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/22

It’s Pretty Good For Emergencies, Trigger Pulling & Wrestling But Not Much Else. Aka: Uncertainty Is More Fun. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:23:09

#108 God & The Devil Are The Same Fella

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/18

Love & Hate Are Inseparable, Hot Depends On Cold, & The Worst Shit You Can Imagine Is What Makes The Best Shit You Can Imagine So Great. Aka: Maybe A Little Gratitude For Your Shitty Attitude Is Inevitable So Maybe Just Deal With It. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:25:32

#107 Vaccination

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/06

Deadly Invisible Bugs, The Religious Fervor & Hysteria On Both Sides, & The Redundantly Mathematical Probability That You Are Reacting Irrationally. Aka: Math Is Your Friend, Hysteria Is Not. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:21:02

#106 Staying Positive

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/05

It Isn’t Easy, It’s Hard & Sometimes It Feels Impossible. Aka; Still Beats Hauling Buckets Of Sewage Out Of The Basement. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:20:00

#105 You Wish!

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/04

Self Love, Self Loathing, & The Projections Thereof Aka: How You Feel About Donald Trump Is Likely How You Feel About Yourself. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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00:39:51

#104 Tofurkey

The Opinion Machine??? ·

2019/12/02

Turkey & Tofu, Apples & Oranges, & Bruce & Caitlin Aka: How To Depopulate Your Next Thanksgiving Dinner --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/theopinionmachine/message

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