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PODCAST

Couples Therapy In Seven Words

Dr. Bruce Chalmer

Be Kind, Don‘t Panic, and Have Faith. Psychologist Dr. Bruce Chalmer and educator Judy Alexander talk about relationships, interview fascinating guests, and answer your questions.

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

59:35

How Can Improv Improve Your Relationship? An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/02/07

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/andrew-davies/.Improv is all about spontaneity, fun, listening, and being willing to play. How can improv help you improve your relationships, romantic or otherwise? Our guest in this episode, Andrew Davies, combines his love and training in theater and Judaism, and beings the joy of improv to children and adults of all ages. We had fun talking to Andrew, and we hope you’ll have fun listening to this interview. Among the many nuggets of

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37:38

Four Things Your Therapist Wants You to Know

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/01/31

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/four-things-your-therapist-wants-you-to-know/.What should you know before you start therapy? Christina Caron wrote an article about that in the New York Times (link below), and Judy and I talk about the four things Caron wrote about, and apply them specifically to couples therapy. As we discuss, therapy is often fluid, especially with couples. Goals can shift, the two members of the couple can differ in their opinions about how the

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40:03

A Hopeless Romantic and the Masculine Ideal: An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/01/24

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/gregory-diehl/.Our guest in this episode, Gregory Diehl, describes himself as a Romantic Idealist, which, he explains is a fundamentally hopeless position since perfection is impossible. And he remains an idealist even as his own love life hasn’t yet come to fruition. We talk about his ideas about the complementarity of masculinity and femininity, and about the retreat center he has established in Armenia. Gregory’s website is

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01:00:06

If Men Have All the Power How Come Women Make the...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/01/17

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/jack-kammer/.Talking about gender issues can be a minefield. Talking about ways in which not only women, but men too are victims of implicit bias can get you canceled—as evidenced by what happened to our guest’s book when he wrote about that. Our guest, Jack Kammer, has the distinction of being a target of cancel culture before the term was coined. We talk about his experiences thinking, speaking, and writing about bias against men. We

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41:27

Diversity, Diagnosis, and Nonsense: When Ideas Turn...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/01/10

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/diversity-diagnosis-and-nonsense/.Okay, I (Bruce) get to rant in this one. Bring on the arguments! How does the good idea of diversity turn into the ideology that makes universities insist that candidates for faculty positions sign loyalty oaths? How does the good idea of understanding the experience of trans people turn into the ideology that says you can’t question whether someone who grew up in a male body should be allowed to swim on

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44:43

From Near-Divorce to a Thriving Marriage: An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2025/01/03

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/sophie-orozco/.What can you do if your husband tells you he no longer loves you, and is ending your marriage? Do you have to just give up? Our guest in this episode, Sophie Orozco, faced that very situation. And her friends, advisors, and therapists told her to just accept it and move on. But Sophie was determined to find a better outcome. She gave herself a year, and discovered that not only could her marriage be saved, but that it was

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46:06

How Can You Tell If Your Therapist is a Quack?

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/12/27

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/therapist-is-a-quack/.Is your therapist a quack? We’ve talked about how to know if you should leave a relationship—what about a relationship with a therapist? What are the signs that you should dump them? As you’ll hear in this episode, thinking about that led us to talk about when diagnoses, such as ADHD or narcissism or Borderline Personality Disorder, can be damaging, even though they are also often useful. Feel free to argue with

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53:54

Becoming a Better Husband: An Interview with Angelo...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/12/20

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/angelo-santiago/.How can men be better husbands and partners? Our guest in this episode is Angelo Santiago, a Marriage and Relationship Coach with a specialization in helping men become better husbands. Angelo had me (Bruce) on his podcast, “Better Husband,” and we were delighted to return the favor. Angelo’s website is https://www.angelosantiago.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and

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41:21

How Do I Know When to Call It Quits in A 40-Year...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/12/13

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/quits-in-40-year-marriage/.A listener question prompted this episode: “Fred” wrote to us asking how to know when to end a 40-year marriage. Judy and I talk about this dilemma from several angles. How do couples get to that point after so many years of relative stability? What’s the role of intimacy in a couple? Are there ethical issues to consider? Let us know what you think. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to

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01:02:05

What the Heck is Self-Love, Anyway? An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/12/06

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/jonathon-aslay/.Our guest in this episode, Jonathon Aslay, is a relationship coach who works especially with people (most often women, but some men) in mid-life. We talk about the particular issues that arise for people at that stage of life, and how Jonathon helps them navigate them. It’s a lively discussion—we had fun! Jonathon’s website is https://www.jonathonaslay.com/. His YouTube channel is

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55:56

Reframing Pressure as a Choice: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/11/29

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/brian-hite/.Our guest in this episode, Brian Hite, has quite the blend of experiences to offer: he’s a Hollywood stuntman with over 100 credits, a Ph.D. in Organizational Psychology, and a sports performance coach. In his speeches and trainings, Brian challenges some conventional assumptions about pressure, motivation, and performance. And his energy is contagious—check out this episode and see if your own level of motivation kicks up a

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37:52

Sex Therapy for Older Adults: An Interview with Dr....

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/11/22

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/jenn-kennedy/.What are some of the issues that come up for older adults in sex therapy? Our guest in this episode, Dr. Jenn Kennedy, tells us how she helps older couples navigate the changes and challenges of maintaining and improving their sexual connection. Dr. Kennedy’s website is https://pleasureproject.us/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign

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46:50

How Important is Sexual Health in Couples Therapy? An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/11/15

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/kelly-ghweinem/.Many therapists who work with couples are uncomfortable talking about sex with their clients—and therefore miss the opportunity to help them deal with those issues. Our guest in this episode, Kelly Ghweinem, tells us about how she helps couples with sexual issues, and how she and her colleague train therapists to equip them with the skills they need to help their clients more effectively with sexual issues. Kelly’s

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52:54

What Can Straight Couples Learn from LGBT Couples? An...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/11/08

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/laurel-roberts-meese/.LGBT couples and straight couples share many of the same issues, but there are also some characteristic differences. And our guest in this episode, Laurel Roberts-Meese, tells us not only about those differences, but about ways straight couples (and their therapists) can learn from LGBT couples. Laurel’s website is https://www.laureltherapy.net/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to

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55:11

Recovering from Relationship Trauma: An Interview...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/11/01

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/mr-jay/.Why is recovering from betrayal so difficult? Our guest in this episode, Mr. Jay, talks about what betrayal trauma is, why it’s different from other kinds of trauma, and how he helps couples recover from it. Mr. Jay’s website is https://mrjayrelationshipcoach.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer’s newsletter right from

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53:17

That No-Good Cheating Jerk Was Doing the Best He...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/10/25

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/no-good-cheating-jerk/.We’ve been getting a lot of reaction to my book Betrayal and Forgiveness. One of the common ones has been people expressing a combination of doubt and horror at the idea that someone who betrayed you was, in some way, doing the best they could. So we talk about that and related ideas. Along the way, Judy and I talk about what happened to our son Eli, who was seriously injured in a freak climbing accident. We

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57:16

How Does Your Attachment Style Affect Your...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/10/18

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/bev-mitelman/.What is attachment style, and why is knowing your own attachment style important in a relationship? Our guest in this episode is Bev Mitelman, a Certified Attachment Practitioner, who helps her clients understand their attachment styles and helps them in their journey toward a secure attachment style that facilitates better relationships. Bev’s website is https://securelyloved.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests

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39:51

Can Psychedelic Therapy Benefit Couples? An Interview...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/10/13

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/steven-radowitz/. Our guest in this episode is Dr. Steven Radowitz, who is the Chief Medical Officer of a program that uses ketamine and other psychedelic therapies to treat a wide variety of issues. Dr. Radowitz tells us how he helps people with psychedelics, and how that work can benefit couples as well as individuals. You can find out more about Dr. Radowitz’s work at https://nushama.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our

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43:43

Accountability and Relationships: An Interview with...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/09/30

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/robert-j-hunt/.What is accountability, and why is it important both in work relationships and in couples? Our guest in this episode is Robert J. Hunt, who has co-written a book about why accountability is important and how to embrace it. Robert’s website is https://nobodycaresbook.com/. Do you have ideas for topics or guests for our podcast? Go to https://ctin7.com and send us a message. And you can also sign up for Dr. Chalmer’s

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47:52

Tantric Dating, Mating, and Relating: An Interview...

Couples Therapy In Seven Words ·

2024/09/20

For the video of this episode, go to https://brucechalmer.com/catherine-auman/.What is tantra? How can sex be a spiritual experience, more than simply a way to give and receive pleasure? What is transpersonal psychology, and how does it differ from traditional psychology? Our guest in this episode, Catherine Auman, is a psychotherapist with advanced training in both traditional and spiritual psychology, and we discuss those topics and more. Catherine’s website is https://catherineauman.com. Do you

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