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PODCAST

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe

Gastor Almonte and Shalewa Sharpe

The War Report w/ G-N-S is comedy a podcast about the news that matters; but also the news that doesn"t. We cover Joe Biden and Joe Budden with equal energy and professionalism. The best news and pop culture podcast - period. Hosted by comedians Shalewa Sharpe and Gastor Almonte.

comedy

All Episodes

01:24:11

Ep. 014 - Before the Madness

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2021/01/07

Note* Today's episode, like all episodes, was recorded on the Tuesday prior to the release. Before all of the... everything. In today's episode, Shalewa jacks renames office supplies and Gastor has to explain to his son what is zoom appropriate attire. They also discuss the end of Adobe Flash, the return of the OG Batman Michael Keaton, and the decision by American Airlines to stop allowing emotional support animals. Link up with

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00:34:17

Bonus Ep - Give me 2 checks! I need 2 checks!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2021/01/04

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor talk about your upcoming stimulus checks, Young Thug's lack of knowledge of Jay-Z and Andre 3000's discography and wonder if Hilaria Baldwin's 10 year performance as a Spanish women should be commended. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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01:25:12

EP. 013 - Get Rid of your Trees!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/31

In today's episode, Shalewa rediscovers the magic of movies, and Gastor needs to rush to get rid of his Christmas Tree before the year kicks off. Together, they discuss Lori Loughlin's release from jail, Mariah Carey's reign on top of the Christmas music charts, and how nose picking is spreading the corona virus. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno

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00:36:30

Bonus Ep - Nugget After Dark

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/28

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor talk about how to rock your Faux Fur, "Nugget after Dark," and wonder if having the both the nicknames Prince and Blanket are too much for one Jackson. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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01:27:40

Ep. 012 - The Black Super Powered Edition

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/24

In today's episode, Shalewa and Gastor share they new found super powers, the long overdue Barbara John Statue in the Capitol Building, and what's the best way to deal with a less-then-average sandwich artist. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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00:36:29

Bonus Ep - We Want them Howard Stern Checks!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/21

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor dream of cashing in like Howard Stern and come to the defense of a local Amazon Delivery driver. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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01:14:19

EP. 011 - It's DOCTOR Jill Biden to you!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/17

In today's episode, Shalewa and Gastor chin-check Joseph Epstein for taking reckless about Dr. Jill Biden Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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00:28:31

Bonus Ep - Be more like Casanova

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/14

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor encourage teens to "fight the power" by wearing any nail polish they want, show genuine concern for Logan Paul, and salute their growing fanbase in Wappingers Falls, NY Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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00:47:18

Ep. 010 - Always Good

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/10

In today's episode, Shalewa applauds the success of Roddy Ricch but wonders what his summer would have been like in a non-quarantine 2020, while Gastor shares with the listeners how his "Always Good" mantra works. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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00:29:09

Bonus Ep - George Clooney's Secrets

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/07

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa doubts the legitimacy of George Clooney's proclaimed hair routine, while Gastor grows concerned for Joe Biden's ability to survive the presidency based on his most recent injury. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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01:19:06

Ep. 009 - Where's Rita?

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/12/03

In today's episode, Shalewa wonders who came to Rita Ora's party, while Gastor wonders if drinking Hennessy before games was the key to Marshawn Lynch's success. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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00:29:58

Bonus Ep - Grown folk know about the Eggplant imoji

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/30

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor discuss the future of fake faces created by artificial intelligence and how to talk to your parents about their sex life. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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01:02:06

Ep. 008 - Lil Wayne deserves a presidential Pardon!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/26

In today's episode, Shalewa goes off on Sherwin-Williams, while Gastor invites 3 people, and only 3 people, to Thanksgiving. Together, they discuss the likelihood of a Donald Trump issuing a pardon of Lil Wayne. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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00:41:30

Bonus Ep - Don't name your son Scooter

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/23

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor discuss Michelle Obama calling out the Trumps on their nonsense, and why you should never date a guy named Scooter. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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01:12:44

Ep. 007 - Benny the Butcher vs McDreamy

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/19

In today's episode, Shalewa is in a better place now that Mercury is no longer in retrograde, and Gastor is learning what that means. Together, they discuss Chris Brown's future in the OnlyFans market, Costco's business practices, and wonder how Blue Ivy Carter has a better agent then they do. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram:

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00:19:33

Bonus Ep - Party In the US of A

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/16

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor look at the Music Charts and see what songs have become hits in the aftermath of the election. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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01:00:20

Ep. 006 - What's more expensive: a Travis Scott verse...

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/12

In today's episode, Shalewa deals with her passive-aggressive cat while Gastor bonds with Shalewa because they both came from "No-pets" households. The duo talk about Ben Carson's sickness, life after Trump's presidency, and paying $55,000 for a McDonalds' toy. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this

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00:36:32

Bonus EP - We're still here.

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/09

*Bonus content was recorded during election day, during uncertain times. In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor find out who Antonio Brown is bunking with, and who the "Karen's" of the country voted for. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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01:00:43

Ep. 005 - Is the World Over?

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/05

In today's episode, Shalewa fights off the last effects of Mercury in Retrograde while Gastor learns Maine's 2-letter abbreviation. The duo also discuss the Lil Wayne choosing Trump over Love, and find a new way to compare Obama to JayZ Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast:

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00:29:27

Bonus EP - Kanye for President!

The War Report w/ Gastor Almonte - N - Shalewa Sharpe ·

2020/11/02

In today's bonus episode, Shalewa and Gastor consider buying property in Sicily for dollar, and discuss the "probable" (ed. - Gastor's words only) Kanye West presidency. Link up with us. Instagram: @WarReportPod @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Twitter: @SilkyJumbo @GastorAlmonte Theme music "Guns Go Cold" provided by Kno of Knomercyproductions Twitter: @Kno Instagram: @KnoMercyProductions --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/warreportpod/support

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