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PODCAST

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

Love & Life is your place for conversations grounded in psych research, psychotherapy, and Biblical truth to help you THRIVE in love and life! Join psychologist Karin Anderson Abrell, Ph.D. and pastor and psychotherapist Elliott Anderson, M.A., as they focus on relationships and how to flourish therein with a holistic approach to emotional and psychological well-being, recognizing we only thrive when we nourish each of these key domains—Mind, Body, and Spirit. Together they bring over 60 years

society & culture relationships

All Episodes

00:33:55

Can Relationships Actually Be Easy? Ep. 287

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/02/14

The Love & Life family is a diverse bunch—from singles, to those exclusively dating, to engaged couples, to marrieds, to divorced folks back on the scene again. We’re all at different places in our love journey. As we thought about what we wanted to share for Valentine’s Day, Producer Tim suggested we grapple with the following: Are relationships doomed to be a constant struggle? Do they have to be SO hard? Could marriage actually be easy? Since it was Tim’s idea, I asked him to share

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00:46:55

Trauma: How it Impacts Our Relationship to Self and...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/02/09

We interrupt our series on engagement to bring you Elliott’s presentation on trauma, which he shared recently at his church. How do we define trauma? What experiences leave a trauma wound? How do these wounds impact our relationships? What does the Bible have to say about trauma? Is there hope for healing? If so, how do we heal? We’ve all experienced some level of trauma—Big T or Little t. Perhaps you never fought in a war zone or were the victim of a violent attack, but we all

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00:36:22

Let's Talk About It: Almost 25% of American Women are...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/02/06

As anyone who’s experienced depression can tell you, it’s brutal. And, with almost 1 in 4 American women taking antidepressants, it’s clear many of us are suffering. What’s going on? What’s to be done? In this latest episode of our “Love & Life: Let’s Talk About It” series, Miriam Conner and I explore depression in America—especially as it relates to women. Specifically, we consider: How depression is conceptualized. The evidence that debunks the “chemical imbalance” explanation. Why

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00:34:44

Let’s Talk About It! All the Hot Takes We’re Not...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/02/06

Welcome to Love & Life: Let’s Talk About It! So, what exactly are we talking about? All the hot topics we’re not supposed to touch—the subjects that get you censored, shadow-banned, and canceled when you broach them. Censorship, shadow-banning, cancelation . . . How could this happen? This is America, the “land of the free!” Or, so we thought . . . Are we actually free if we’re not permitted to challenge assertions and dissent from dictates? How is it we now live in a society in which

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00:35:55

Do THIS When You’re Engaged to Establish a Strong,...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/02/01

We continue our series on engagement with the next segment of Elliott’s premarital counseling curriculum. Today’s episode delves into Session 1, Part 2. Elliott discusses the themes couples should address when they’re engaged—along with the exercises and activities he employs to help generate conversations around these important topics. If you’re engaged—or expect to be someday—this episode is for you! And actually, even if you’re married, you’ll find much value in this conversation. Sponsor The

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00:38:30

5 Key Patterns for Your Engagement to Ensure a...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/25

You’re engaged! Time for wedding planning! But, what about marriage planning? Because a strong, fulfilling marriage starts long before your wedding day! In fact, our engagement serves as a crucial time for us to address key concerns and establish healthy patterns which will set us up for a strong, fulfilling marriage. With over 30 years counseling engaged and married couples, Elliott has a wealth of recommendations to help you utilize this important time in your relationship. Join us to explore

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00:29:41

We’re Engaged! But, Should We Actually Get Married?...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/16

Building a strong marriage starts long before the wedding day and with 30+ years of working with couples, Elliott has plenty of solid advice for anyone newly engaged or contemplating engagement! But, first things first—it’s thrilling to accept a proposal and begin wedding planning, but we need to be sure we’re doing all this with the right person for us! Too often, premarital counseling focuses on household chores and budget, extended family relationships, etc. And yes, these are important, of

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00:30:38

We’re Engaged! But, Should we Actually Get Married?...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/11

You’re engaged! So in love! It’s exhilarating! Except, when you have cold feet. Are these just wedding jitters? Or, do you need to rethink your decision? As a former runaway bride, this topic hits home to me. Elliott and I decided to kick off our series on premarital counseling by asking a very important first question, “What if you’re engaged, but you’re feeling uncertain and unsure?” In this episode, I share the confusion and angst I experienced when engaged to my first fiancé. Elliott and I

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00:37:37

Family Roles Part II: Which Role Do You Play? Ep. 278

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/08

In part 2 of our conversation about family roles, Elliott and I share specific roles we may play when interacting with our family of origin—and others in our lives! Are you the “family hero?” The black sheep? The lost child? Join us to determine your role and how to rewrite the script should you feel your role constrains you or proves unhealthy for your adult growth and development. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your

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00:37:08

Family Roles: How They Impact Us During the...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/08

Whether we’re aware of it or not, we each play various roles within our families. And, even if we’ve grown and changed, we often step right back into our role during family gatherings! Do you know your family role? Do you understand how it impacts you during the holidays and throughout the year? Some of us have a sense of our family role. Maybe you’re the instigator or the peacemaker. The caretaker or the rebel. The leader or the clown. But oftentimes we play a role and we’re not even aware we’re

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00:48:27

Three’s a Crowd: How Triangulation Destroys Healthy...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2024/01/08

Triangulation. It’s so easy. We all do it. But, it’s SO unhealthy. What’s triangulation? Here’s a common example: We get angry, but instead of talking to the person who upset us, we gripe about it with someone else. We loop in a third party. It diffuses the tension, but does it move us toward solving the dispute/problem? Not at all. As we continue our series on how to connect with our families in a healthy manner throughout the holidays—and always!—Elliott and I discuss the perils of

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00:38:33

Mind, Body, Spirit: Reflections on 2023 and...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/12/29

We wrap up this year with some personal reflections regarding Love & Life’s themes of mind, body, and spirit! Elliott and I discuss some revelations we’ve had via the books and articles we’ve read including: Brain Energy by Christopher Palmer, M.D. Joanna Moncrieff’s challenge of the serotonin theory of depression The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk The work of Dr. Caroline Leaf We share some intentions for aligning our minds, body, and spirit in 2024 and invite you to

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00:34:42

Family Rules: Should You Follow Them Now That You’re...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/12/14

Elliott and I continue our series on how to best engage with family members over the holidays with this episode devoted to family rules. All families have a “code of conduct.” Some of these expectations are well known by all members. Others operate just beneath the surface. How do we manage family rules now that we’re adults? How do we navigate the expectations of our family and then adjust to those of our spouse’s family—especially when these rules are so very different? And furthermore, what

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00:48:39

The Pure Fat Loss Challenge with Justin Savich Ep. 275

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/12/11

With the new year right around the corner, you may be thinking about resolutions. Many of us want to level up our health and fitness, but oftentimes we feel daunted because we’ve tried a hundred times before, yet never reached our goals. Help is here! Justin Savich, creator of The Pure Fat Loss Challenge, brings over 20 years of nutrition, strength training, and fitness knowledge to his proven program which has helped thousands of people lose fat–not muscle! Join us for Justin’s expertise about

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00:48:19

Should You Cut Off Your Toxic Family? Individuate in...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/11/30

Last week we talked about the importance of maintaining boundaries with our family during holiday gatherings. But what if boundaries aren’t enough? What if we simply can’t get along with our family? We no longer agree on anything and we can’t find common ground. Should we completely cut them off? Or, is there a better way? Today, Elliott and I discuss the Family Systems construct of Individuation and explain why it’s an incredibly important process to move through in young adulthood—whether

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00:43:48

Got Boundaries? Why They’re Necessary for Holiday...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/11/22

Holiday family gatherings should bring us closer, but sometimes they do the exact opposite! All too often, we get together only to grow apart. Help is here! Implementing principles from Family Systems Therapy allows us to cultivate true intimacy while reducing family drama. In today’s episode, Elliott and I delve into boundaries. We share concrete strategies for establishing boundaries with family members—even those who pry into your business with questions like: “Are you seeing anyone

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00:21:55

3 Ways to Avoid Family Drama Over the Holidays! Ep. 271

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/11/17

The holidays are upon us and in efforts to make the season as bright as possible, Elliott and I want to share principles from one of our favorite therapeutic orientations—Family Systems Theory and Therapy. And yes, siblings can get under our skin in ways no one else can. And sure, in-law interactions may be strained. And of course, blended families present us with unique challenges, but still—we CAN remain joyful at parties and gatherings and we CAN minimize the drama by keeping 3 key principles in

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00:48:15

Money, Values, & Love: “Dear Fellow Spender” with...

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/11/09

In fact, we’re taught to avoid talking about finances because it’s considered a bit gauche—especially when you don’t know someone very well. Furthermore, what if you’re not all that proud of your relationship with money? Maybe your bank account refuses to grow and “retail therapy” is your go-to coping mechanism! Or, it seems you just can’t get ahead no matter how much you save! Emily Burnett can relate. She’s a self-proclaimed “money mess” and “budget loather” who was thousands of dollars in debt

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00:41:30

3 Ways NOT to Stray Ep. 269

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/11/02

I asked Elliott the other day, “We’ve been talking about cheating and recovery, but what can we do to try to prevent affairs from happening in the first place?” And yes, healing is possible and, as Elliott continues to stress, we may even find deeper intimacy after infidelity. But of course, wouldn’t we prefer to grow closer to our spouse without going through a marital breakdown? In this conversation, we present 3 strategies for keeping your marriage solid and connected! We can’t control our

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00:38:34

Cheating: What's the First Step Towards Healing? Ep. 268

Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott ·

2023/10/28

After posting episodes 265 and 266, Karin and I continue to see a need to continue the discussion about cheating. So today we continue our cheating series by responding additional concerns and discuss how to start the healing process. Specifically, we address: What's the first step in the healing process? How to navigate forgiveness and grief What to do if children are involved What rebuilding trust looks like after betrayal Join us for this third segment in our series on cheating. And

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